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Per usual, Kun’s phone buzzed with many texts from Leo as soon as he turned it on. He grinned as he opened them.
Leo: You won't believe what Ney came up with!! Not until you see it anyway!! ;) ;)
Leo: Omg Ney is a genius. You'll love this.
Leo: Tadaaa! What do you think?
There was a picture attached to the last message. While it loaded Kun wondered what ‘great idea’ Neymar had come up with this time. The kid was half a world away and he was still putting Leo up to God knows what. If he convinced Leo and Suarez to get matching tattoos this time instead of matching novelty t-shirts Kun would have to hold an intervention and then--
Ping!
There Leo was on his phone screen, arm outstretched to take the selfie, smiling and sporting platinum blond hair? Kun blinked, and then stared out from the plane window before turning back to the phone screen. Nope, exhaustion and jetlag or not, his eyes were not playing him a trick. Leo really had bleached his hair and it looked almost metallic gray under the bright sunlight, and it was amazing.
That’s what I’m talking about!! Haters gonna hate but your hair is on fiireee!!!
He added a few heart eyed emojis for further emphasis but paused just as he was about to hit the send button. On one hand, Leo’s hair was bold and perfect and it deserved all the praise in the world. On the other hand, however, it had been Neymar’s idea, and Neymar did not need any encouragement in his outrageous schemes. If Kun approved of this one, what would he convince Leo to do next with his new found power?
Matching friendship tattoos, his brain supplied, that’s what Neymar will do. Before you get your chance.
I’ve seen you with way worse. Still, bleached hair Leo?
Kun did not like hiding his true opinion from Leo one bit, especially when Leo was really pulling off the bleached hair and beard look, but needs must. I’ll tell him how awesome he looks at the next international bre--whenever I see him next, he thought as he made his way to the airport.
*-*-*
He was busy unpacking in their Beijing hotel room when his phone buzzed with a single incoming text from Masche. It was in his trademark laconic-and-yet-surprisingly-passive-aggressive style and had an attached video.
Masche: Hope you are enjoying what you are doing to all of us. Love, Masche.
Wondering what he did wrong this time, Kun clicked on the video. It seemed to be a recorded Skype call between Neymar and Suarez. Because the one thing Kun wanted to do right after a grueling international flight was to spy on Neymar’s Skype conversations. Obviously.
“You know what I’m saying, right?” Neymar was whining to a sympathetic if a little bored Suarez, “I have been trying to get Lionel--”
Kun paused the video. Nobody called Leo Lionel except his mother and Kun, when they had a point to make. The sheer gall of the kid.
“--to try something different with his hair for ages. You too, but that’s a different matter. Then he calls me, saying ‘hey Ney, Kun thinks I should try a bolder hair style, can you please help?’ and do I complain? Do I remind him that I have been saying the same thing for years, no?”
“No, no you don’t” Suarez sighed, not that it slowed Neymar down in any meaningful way.
“I don’t. So I come up with the natural beard, bleached hair look because if there is anyone who can pull it off better than Ramsey it’s Lionel,”
Kun had to agree with that statement even as he cringed at hearing Neymar refer to Leo as Lionel, again. Someone would have to talk to the kid. Still he was enjoying watching this video a great deal more than he thought he would.
“--and I don’t say anything either when he goes, ‘yeah I think that’s what Kun was talking about.’ But what can I do Luiz, when he finally gets it done, looks smoking hot and then in two hours texts me ‘I don’t think Kun liked it’ with a sad emoji? What am I supposed to do?”
Here Suarez tried his best to be helpful and failed spectacularly. “I mean, I think the whole bleached hair craze is overrated too, if that makes a difference?” he said before the video disconnected on Neymar’s end with a loud, frustrated grunt.
Well.
He had made an offhand comment during the Copa about Leo changing his hairstyle, brought on by Perisic’s creative design. He hadn't meant much by it and he definitely did not think Leo had taken it to heart. There he was being unfair to both Neymar and his Leo and withholding well deserved praise. This would not do.
As Kun dialed Leo's number he realized that he'd been grinning for some time. As soon as his friend picked up, Kun exclaimed
“Leo! Never mind what I said earlier. Your hair looks A-MA-ZING! Now what do you say to getting, oh I don't know, matching tattoos? Tattoos that matched? We'd be so cool, AND I have the best designs in mind.”