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James had finally dared to ask Regulus Black to be his boyfriend exactly one month ago. They had been teasing—flirting with each other for far longer than that, and now James could introduce Regulus as his boyfriend, the love of his life, the prettiest star in his darkest night.
They were lounging together on the sofa in the Marauders’ flat, which James had decided to move out after he found a perfect place for him and Regulus, but who knew how long it would take. So now, Regulus had left his family, earned a blood-traitor name just like his brother did, all to be with James. He still couldn’t believe it was real—that Regulus chose to have this life with him.
The thought made him overwhelmed, James tightened his hold on Regulus as the younger boy nuzzled closer, feeling the warmth of his skin. Regulus clutched a hot water bag on his stomach. James wished he could soothe all the pain away, he didn’t like it when Regulus was in pain. If James could have cramps for him instead, he would gladly do it. But unfortunately; he couldn’t, and no spell could alleviate it either.
Regulus had told James that all James needed to do was to hold him (and buy him some chocolate), and James was doing as he was told. He felt like he could have done more. He didn’t know how cramps felt—he had no idea how much pain they could cause, and his mother stopped menstruating not long after James was born, he had absolutely no clue. However, he did have some girl friends, courtesy to Lily Evans, who had tried teaching him about how people who menstruate suffer every month by getting angry at him for the smallest thing ever and order him to go get her a water bag, (Lily once said that she was more comfortable using them more than any magical spell that barely helped anyway, perhaps it was because of familiarity), a painkiller pills, and a hot chocolate in which most of the time it was Remus who got the chocolate for her.
(And yes, Lily was the one introducing Regulus to the world of Muggle’s-period-painkiller-invention or whatever she called it.)
Sure, James wasn’t so unfamiliar with the concept of menstruation, but he still knew so little of it anyway. Besides, this was Regulus Black! It was Regulus Black!
James kept his face straight, his finger trailing on Regulus’ arm as he scrolled on his phone, trying his best to distract Regulus from the pain. At the other side of the sofa, sitting beside Regulus, leaning against the armrest was none other than Sirius Black.
The subtle glances Sirius kept throwing at Regulus—James noticed them, even if Regulus might not. Sirius didn’t say anything, all he did was sit there and watch TV. Still, Sirius’ presence was comforting to Regulus. James knew. He just knew.
“What the fuck is that?” Regulus said, his eyes narrowed judgmentally. His phone was playing a video of a group of people dressing up as the Lorax in a bright orange body suit and dancing in front of a tree. Or shaking their arses would be more accurate. James knew the train, he thought it was the funniest thing on earth. His boyfriend seemed to agree with him. A soft chuckle escaped from Regulus’ lips—a blessing to his ears. “They look stupid.”
“I know.” James smiled. “They’re dressed up as the Lorax. Do you know about The Lorax?”
“What even is that?” Regulus shook his head. “An alien?”
“No,” James laughed. Regulus still looked up at him with that adorable face of his and all James could think was: life is unfair, because Regulus is simply too beautiful, even with a frown on his face. “It’s a movie about—um… trees, I think?”
“You don’t sound so sure.”
“I’ve never watched it.”
His simple answer seemed to satisfy Regulus enough. He didn’t ask any more questions, just kept watching the video and laughed along with James.
“What are you two giggling at?” Turned out it was Sirius, who asked another question. James told him like he told Regulus, except that Sirius knew exactly what James was talking about. “Oh. Are you watching those videos? It’s literally the dumbest shit. We should do it for Halloween though.”
“You mean dress up as the Lorax?” James grinned at the idea of them wearing the same costume, doing the dumbest shit together—Sirius’ own word, by the way.
“Exactly.” Sirius returned the same playful grin.
Regulus turned to his brother suddenly. “You know The Lorax? Have you watched it?”
“Once, I guess. Long time ago with Mary and Remus.” Sirius shrugged. “Why? You want to watch it?”
“No, not really,” Regulus replied. “Why are they dancing at the tree?”
Sirius’ eyebrows furrowed, and he thought about it for a while before simply shrugging again. “Don’t remember. Maybe they’re helping the tree to grow faster?”
“How would that help it grow faster?”
“And how the fuck would I know? Maybe it's magic.”
Regulus grumbled something that sounded like useless, then he snuggled up on James’ neck again. If Sirius was offended, he didn’t show. He didn’t even retort, probably because Sirius didn’t want to risk upsetting Regulus. Or getting Regulus mad at him like James unintentionally did to Lily dozens of times before.
Another video of The Lorax appeared on his feed. And another. It took James three videos to realize Regulus clicked on the hashtags to watch this dumbest shit specifically. Oh, Regulus really liked this for whatever reason. James couldn’t help but smile when Regulus’ fingers rolled over the screen again. He was still laughing at people in orange body suits. Cute. Like, really cute. This probably made James fall harder for him, as if he didn’t break every single bone already.
Regulus’ body shook slightly as he kept giggling— James could feel Regulus’ laughter in his soul. Then, suddenly, it just stopped. The shaking disappeared and came back, but more tremendously. A hitch breathed. A sniffle. And oh, Regulus was crying.
“Reg?” Putting his phone away, James’ hands came to hold Regulus’ face. His beautiful gray eyes were closed tightly, his nose and cheeks red, glistening with tears. “Reg? Love, what’s wrong?”
All Regulus did was cry harder. Before James knew it, Sirius was already right beside Regulus, trying to have a look at his brother’s face.
“Are you hurt? Do you want pills—or chocolate—or anything?” His voice laced with worry he didn’t try to hide. But Regulus just shook his head and said nothing. James was confused. He didn’t know what was happening. Did he do something wrong? Was the cramp getting worse?
“Regulus,” Sirius said softly, his hand resting on Regulus’ shoulder. His expression was tense, yet there was something in his eyes so tenderly. “What’s wrong?”
Regulus took a deep breath before pushing himself out of James’ embrace, which left James with nothing but fear. The air in the room suddenly felt so cold and breathless. Then, slowly Regulus opened his eyes that were filled with unshed tears. He spoke, his voice cracking. “Nothing’s wrong.”
“Love—”
“Regulus. I need you to tell me what’s wrong so we can help you, alright?”
Sirius’ tone was very careful and calm. Yet still stern— the kind of tone that you knew you had to comply.
Regulus glanced at Sirius warily, while Sirius merely offered him a gentle smile, and a hand that delicately wiped Regulus’ tears on his cheeks away. “It’s just not funny anymore,” Regulus said abruptly.
“Uhm— what?” The question left James’ mouth without his consent. He didn’t even notice he had spoken it out loud, not until Regulus burst into a sob and a glare from Sirius. “Wait. I’m sorry—”
His mouth shut completely when Sirius pulled his brother into a hug and shushed James with his finger on his lips, signaling him to stop fucking talking. Or something close.
Regulus was now sobbing into Sirius’ chest, his whole body shaking. The sound almost made James jump off the building, he never wanted to hear Regulus cry again. James didn’t know what kind of face he was making, but somehow Sirius could keep his mask calm. Not that calm though, because at the corner of his mouth, there was a little curve. Sirius was holding Regulus close, rocking them side to side, his hand caressing Regulus, and he was stifling a laugh. All the while James sat there, dumbfounded and useless and confused.
“Why are you crying?” Sirius asked with a hint of endearment. He knew why and asked anyway, perhaps it was another way to tease Regulus. James could never understand how siblings work. “Are you seriously crying over people shaking their arses at the trees?”
“People in orange body suits,” James added helplessly.
Sirius looked at him, amused. “Yeah. Thanks, James. People in bloody orange body suits shaking their arses at the trees? Is that what you’re crying over, Regulus? Was it so emotional?”
James didn’t know why Sirius decided to rile Regulus up. The memory of furious Lily Evans was still crystal clear, which already scarred him to death.
Regulus, with his fists clenching on Sirius’ band T-shirt, answered with a broken sob. “No. It stopped being funny,” he hiccuped, “and it was stupid. I don’t know why I laughed.”
That only confused James more.
“I agree. It was really stupid,” Sirius said, pressing a kiss on Regulus’ hair. “I don’t know why you laughed either. Even I didn’t laugh.”
What the fuck are you saying? Is what James was trying to convey by his expression. Sirius knew what James was doing, he knew, of course, he knew. Their hearts were linked together and so were their minds. Sirius only shushed him again. Again!
Regulus lifted his head up, staring at his brother with eyelashes still wet and tears still streaming down his face. “Are you still going to wear that for Halloween?”
(Regulus spat that like it was something rotten)
“Well, do you want me to?”
“No.” He shook his head furiously. “You’re already stupid enough.”
“Oh, shut up.” Sirius just sighed and shoved Regulus’ head back down, resting on his shoulder. “Fine. We won’t wear it. I didn’t actually want to wear it anyway.”
“Good.” Regulus’ voice was muffled.
The two brothers didn’t say anything else after that. Regulus didn’t move away from Sirius, instead he was getting more comfortable and calm, his body stopped trembling, he recovered from sobbing, and only a sniff could be heard in this quiet room. Sirius’ hand stayed rubbing Regulus’ back, adjusting his water bag to make sure Regulus’ cramps wouldn’t get worse. Soon enough, Regulus fell asleep in his brother’s arms.
“Prongs?”
It was Sirius’ concern voiced that made James realize he had been doing nothing for—what minutes? Hours?
“Prongs, can you hear me?”
James managed a small nod. “Yeah. Yeah, I can.”
“Good.” Sirius frowned slightly. “Are you alright?”
“Oh, I’m fine. Just—” He swallowed down a lump in his throat. “You’re very good.”
Sirius raised an eyebrow at him.
“I mean you’re good. At this.” James gestured his hand to Regulus, sleeping soundlessly and peacefully. “At Regulus.”
“I’ve got years of experience, Potter.”
“I know.” James laughed softly, his eyes never left Regulus’ sleeping form. “I’ve never seen him like this before. You know, crying over something like that.”
“That means he’s more comfortable with you.”
James was trying not to blush, he was sure he failed miserably judging by the teasing smirk on his best friend’s face. This felt as if he was getting a blessing from his brother-in-law.
“Was he always like that?” James asked instead.
Sirius looked taken aback for a moment before he nodded, his hands still holding Regulus close. “Yes. I’ve been dealing with this since he was eleven, James. Eleven. Can you believe he once cried because I bought him two plushies instead of three? He told me they came in a set, they were a trio or something. And I left the other one out, that I didn’t care about the feeling of being left behind. He was twelve, I think.”
Sirius told the story angrily, and James knew he was only faking it. James could see it in Sirius’ eyes—there was softness and nostalgia in there. James didn’t blame him, Regulus must have been so adorable with his baby cheeks and red nose. And a pout, maybe.
“So what did you do?”
“I brought the last one, obviously.”
“You spoiled him, pads.”
Sirius only shrugged. But he was proud of himself.
Silence settled between them. And James decided to destroy it. “I think it was funny, though.”
“Oh yeah, me too.”
“But definitely stupid.”
“Definitely. But still funny. And don’t say that to Reggie”
“Sure.”
Regulus stirred lightly, and Sirius just put a hand on his head and patted him, then Regulus went back to his deep sleep.
James couldn’t help but admire him. Regulus might be his boyfriend, but he was still Sirius’ little brother; the one Sirius’ had been taken care of for his whole life.
Still, James felt a little guilty that he didn’t do more for Regulus. He should have done something. He could have done something.
“James.” He looked up to meet Sirius’ eyes, and there was warmth inside. “I think Regulus really appreciates that you’re here. And that’s more than enough”
Before James could say anything, the front door was opened, followed by the sound of footsteps making their way to the living room. Remus walked inside, hands full of grocery bags. He stopped dead in his tracks when his eyes landed on Sirius. (And Regulus and James.) A small smile appeared on his face. “What happened when I was gone?”
James got up to help Remus with the bags, putting them down on the table as quietly as he could.
“The Lorax happened,” James replied.
“What?” Remus looked so confused, he searched James’ eyes as if he was trying to get a confirmation. “Did you lot watch The Lorax?”
“Moony, why was the Lorax dancing in front of the trees?” Sirius asked instead, which only made Remus more puzzled.
“Why the fuck would you want to know that? Is this about the trend?”
“Just answer the question, Moony. Is it because of magic? Did the dance help the trees grow faster?”
“No, I don’t think so. It had nothing to do with the plot, I think? The dance was popular just because it was in the ending scene.”
“Oh,” Sirius’ shoulders slumped, he didn’t hide the chagrin on his face at all. And honestly, it was devastating. “Well, that’s disappointing.”
James walked back to the sofa, crouching down to feel Regulus’ hot water bag. It had already gotten cold. “I’ll make a new one,” he said to Sirius before taking the bag from Regulus’ abdomen. Regulus didn’t even stir, just sleeping silently in the comfort of Sirius’ arms.
“Did you really think that dance is a magic thing?”
And when the evening came, they did watch The Lorax together, despite Regulus’ attempts to protest.