Chapter Text
Chapter One
Aki didn’t particularly want to be here, but she had promised her parents that, when she had some time off from her studies, she would come home for a visit. She hadn’t been back to Neo Domino City since she had left four years ago, and truly she hadn’t felt any desire to return. The shadows of her past hung over the city like a dark cloud, one she wasn’t eager to come under once more. But she had made a commitment, so here she was, back in her parents’ dining room, eating breakfast and wishing she was back at the university.
There was one bright spot in all of this, though.
When her father asked about her plans for the day, she couldn’t help but smile at least a little. “I thought I’d surprise Yusei and drag him away for lunch later.”
“Oh?”
Her father’s knowing grin irritated her for reasons she couldn’t explain, the small spark of joy she held all but disappearing. “We haven’t talked much lately since we’ve both been so busy, so I thought it would be nice to catch up, that’s all.” She paused to compose herself. “Though, I do wonder if they’ll even let me up to his office without telling him I’m there? It’ll still be a surprise of course, but much less so.”
“I’m not sure I follow. Why wouldn’t you be allowed in his office?”
The answer to that question seemed a bit too obvious considering her father was, himself, a government employee, but she found herself answering absentmindedly anyway. “Security and all of that. Surely I won’t be allowed to wander around MIDS alone.”
When the silence stretched on a little too long, she glanced at her father to find a puzzled expression on his face. “You don’t know?”
“Know what?”
“Yusei doesn’t work at MIDS anymore.”
She frowned, her brows knitting together in confusion. “What do you mean?”
“I wondered about it when he stopped showing up to all those events we’re always required to attend, so I asked a friend of mine over there. He resigned… almost two years ago? I guess he owns a repair shop now.”
Aki couldn’t believe what she was hearing. “Did your friend say why he resigned?”
“He didn’t know, no. I’m surprised Yusei didn’t tell you.”
“That makes two of us.” Why hadn’t he said anything? Every time she had asked how work was going, he had given a generic answer; he’d had ample opportunities to say, ‘hey I have a new job now’. What would make him keep that to himself? Whatever the reason, she was still determined to steal him away for lunch, so she could ask him herself. “Do you have the address of his shop?”
“I don’t, but I know the name of it. Should be easy enough to find.”
Easy, indeed; even if she hadn’t had the exact address, the large sign on the front of the building with the curling silhouette of a silver dragon on it would have been difficult to miss. Stardust Repair was located in an old brick building in the historic part of the North Center district, not far from where she knew his house was located. He could walk to work if he wanted (and, knowing him, he probably did, at least some of the time). The building had three garage spaces, all three doors open to let the breeze blow through, the clank and whir of tools spilling out into the street. He hadn’t been lying the last months when he’d said work was (still) busy; he seemed to be doing pretty well for himself.
As she opened the door to the office, a small bell jangled from above. She was sure no one would hear that above the noise in the garage, but they must have rigged it somehow to alert them because a moment later a woman with cropped blue hair came in through the side door behind the counter.
“Can I help you?”
“I came to see Yusei, if I could.”
Arms crossing over her chest, her eyebrow rising skeptically, she said, “He’s a bit tied up. Something I can help you with?”
Clearly this woman had some reason to be defensive that Aki couldn’t understand, but she would do her best to diffuse any suspicion. Aki shook her head. “I’m an old friend. I just came to steal him for lunch, if he’ll let me.”
The woman smirked. Apparently she’d known him long enough to know how much of a workaholic he could be. “I’ll see if I can pull him away.” She left through the same door she’d come in, leaving Aki alone in the office.
Which gave her a chance to snoop. Sort of. There wasn’t much to see. Various certifications hung, framed, on the wall behind the counter, and of course, there were the usual fixtures of an office: filing cabinets and office supplies and computers. The most personal thing in the room was Yusei’s certificate, validating his ability to fix autos. She couldn’t imagine how bored he must have been taking classes to get that, when he already knew everything there was to know and then some. He hadn’t really had a choice, she knew; it had been one thing when he had been repairing anything and everything out of Zora’s garage, and entirely another to own an actual business. With at least one employee. She still couldn’t quite wrap her head around all of this.
The door opening again caught her attention; she half expected to see the lady from before, coming back to tell her Yusei was too busy, so she was pleasantly surprised to see someone else. The look on Yusei’s face alone made coming back to the city worth the grief.
“Aki! What --?”
“I promised my parents I’d come back when I got a chance, so here I am. I couldn’t very well not come to see you too, you know.”
He ran a hand through his hair, and hesitantly said, “I suppose you’d like an explanation for this, huh?”
She snorted. “Yes. But over lunch, if you can spare the time.”
He glanced at the clock. “For you, I will make time. Just let me run back and let the others know.” He darted back through the door like this lunch was the most important thing he was going to do today.
Others, he had said. So at least two. She definitely needed to find out just how many people he had working here.
He returned a couple of minutes later, slinging a black leather jacket over his t-shirt. “Where would you like to eat?”
“You know the area better than I do. What’s good?”
Yusei thought for a moment. “There’s a café down the street. We eat there all the time, partly because it’s in walking distance, but the food is good.”
“Sounds perfect.”
“Won’t need this, then, if we’re walking.” He shrugged off his jacket again, and draped it over the counter before turning for the door.
As she followed him out, Aki added, “Walking gives us extra time for you to explain why I thought you were still at MIDS.”
Pink colored his cheeks as the corners of his lips pulled into a sheepish smile. “I don’t suppose ‘it never came up’ would be an acceptable explanation?”
“Not by a long shot. You had plenty of opportunities.”
“I suppose I did.” He paused. “The truth is… it’s complicated, and I didn’t feel like over text was the right way to talk about what happened.”
That, she understood. Some things were better said face-to-face. “Well, I’m here now.”
He smiled, then, brighter than she thought she’d ever seen from him. “You are, indeed. How long are you staying?”
The temptation was strong to snap at him not to change the subject, but she refrained; she knew from experience (and her studies, as well) that, if he was changing the subject, he probably wasn’t ready to talk about it. He wasn’t off the hook, of course; she was just going to give him the space he was subtly requesting about a topic he wasn’t prepared for since he hadn’t known she was coming. In this case, she was better off letting him get around to it in his own time. “Just this week. I almost wish it was longer, but I have a lot to do before classes start back up again.” That was only half a lie; she didn’t really want to be here, but being with him again? This…was nice, at least.
Yusei steered her into the café and was immediately greeted by the girl behind the counter.
She held back her laughter until after they had ordered and found a table. “They greet you by name and know your order. You really do come here a lot, huh?”
He shrugged with another sheepish grin. “It’s convenient. And I’m hardly the only regular.”
The food was as good as he had said. He asked her about school, and she obliged, though there wasn’t much of interest to tell that hadn’t gone into a text at some point: she was still enjoying her studies and change of culture that came with a foreign country, and her roommate was just terrible as ever but she was looking into renting an apartment off campus with her friends. Beyond that, there wasn’t much else to say. And, anyway, she was itching to pry. Just a little.
“So, this shop of yours. How many people do you have working for you?”
“Three. One is only part-time -- older guy, there more because he’s bored with retirement than because he needs the income. And you met Riza. She was my first hire because she started out as a business major before switching to auto, and I needed someone who actually knows how to run a business -- plus, it was technically her idea in the first place. We’re also debating hiring a receptionist so we don’t have to run back and forth between the office and the shop so much, but that’s a work in progress.”
Three. Yusei owned his own business and he had three employees (with the possibility of a fourth), and she had known none of it. What else had she missed? …well, she certainly knew one other major thing he had left out: he still hadn’t explained why he had resigned from MIDS in the first place.
“Aki.”
She met his gaze.
“I know you want to know why I left MIDS, and I will explain it all to you, but, just for now, can we leave it? Let me take you to dinner tomorrow, and I’ll explain after that.”
She smiled. “That sounds like a fair proposal.” She had time; she could wait one more day.
As promised, he showed up promptly at 5:45 the following evening, driving an actual car rather than his d-wheel, sporting a nice button-down shirt and blazer -- both things she was sure he hadn’t worn much in the last two years since there was little demand for a mechanic to dress business casual, after all. She hadn’t been sure what to expect, really, but apparently he had taken an appreciation for the finer things in life, and the restaurant reflected that: dim lights and a gourmet menu with prices to match, but not so fanciful that she felt out of place without a cocktail dress either.
The waiter recognized him, not for being a regular like the barista had, but rather for his previous work; sometimes, especially now, when she was with him, she easily forgot that he used to be a fairly prominent public figure -- and, in some ways, still was. To the rest of the world, he was the savior of the city and the inventor of ground-breaking technology; to her, he was just Yusei.
“Would you like wine?”
She glanced up from her menu. That might be nice, but she knew he had never been one for alcohol particularly. “I don’t need it.”
“Not what I asked.”
Blunt as always. “I suppose. Perhaps just one glass, though -- unless you’re planning on some as well.” So many things had changed; perhaps that had too.
He shook his head with a small smile. “Can’t say that I was. I don’t really drink.”
“Never acquired that particular taste, huh?”
“Never felt like trying.”
At least something had stayed the same. As the evening wore on, she felt as though both nothing and everything had changed. Two old friends, sharing a meal -- a familiar scene, yet nothing about it felt normal. It was as if she had left a room for five minutes and upon returning found that someone had moved all the furniture just slightly to the left -- different in a way that she couldn’t quite pin down on a first glance but enough that she knew something wasn’t quite right. The same, but not. Time had a funny way of doing that, she supposed. He was the same person she had always known -- the same kind and gentle soul -- but he had grown and changed just the same as she had. The saying was true then: you really can’t go home. Life could never be how it once was; while change was not inherently negative, she still had to get reacquainted with once-familiar things as if she had never truly known them at all -- as if seeing again now in the light what she had once only known in the darkness, the true form being revealed but only some of what was expected and much that wasn’t.
The more she learned, the more she wanted to know. Aki wanted to see all of him and everything he had become. Now she found herself truly wishing her stay could have been longer.
They finished their meal, Yusei paid the bill, and they stepped out into the heat, the sunset slowly fading beyond the horizon.
“It’s a lovely evening,” Yusei commented, “and there’s a park across the street. Care for a walk? I still owe you an explanation, after all.”
Truthfully, she had been afraid he’d forgotten and she had been dreading having to bring it up again but she also couldn’t have let it go if she’d tried. She should have known better, really; he had promised to tell her, and he always kept his word. “I’d love that -- both parts.”
They continued in silence for a few moments, wandering down the path until they came upon a pond, the last light of the day reflecting in vibrant color across the water’s surface. He led her to a bench slightly off the path and sat down.
A moment passed before Yusei took a breath and leaned forward, his elbows on his knees. “Truthfully, while I’m not ashamed of what happened, the reason I resigned from MIDS still isn’t something that’s easy to talk about. The short version is that I left for my own health and well-being; the long version is… well, a lot more complicated.
“I was plenty happy working there, don’t misunderstand. I enjoyed my work; my coworkers were wonderful -- I’m still friends with several of them. But, one day, out of the blue, I had a panic attack at work. I didn’t really know what had set me off and, truthfully, I didn’t want to consider the cause, so I just brushed it off as nothing. But, over the course of a couple of months, I had more, with increasing frequency. I kept ignoring them because I didn’t want to admit to what was happening or what that could mean for my job. Then, one day, Haga walked in on me in the middle of one. He patiently helped me through it, but afterward, when he found out that wasn’t the first time, he gave me an ultimatum: either I could get help or he would suspend me. He recognized what I had been trying so hard to avoid, and I finally had to face the fact that I had a problem that wasn’t going to go away if I ignored it hard enough. So…I started going to therapy. I won’t bore you with the details, but the bottom line is that working at MIDS was, itself, triggering my attacks. In the end, I decided I needed to find something else for work -- not to run away from the problem, but to give me more space and time to work through it. So I went back to my roots, and truly, I love this too. I’d missed working on engines when I was at MIDS -- I hadn’t really had the time aside from general maintenance on my own vehicles and certainly no time to tinker like I’d had before. So, I went back to school, got my certificate, and ended up with my own shop. And now I don’t think I’d rather it be any other way.”
“That must have been the most boring year of your life.” A comment on the least important thing he’d said, but with the weight of this revelation hanging heavily between them, she needed some way to clear the air a little. It wasn’t that she didn’t want to talk about such things, but she needed a moment to process everything. He had been going through so much and hadn’t said a word -- typical Yusei behavior, really; he would never willingly “bother” his friends with his problems. Knowing that was just the way he was didn’t make the thought any easier to stomach, however.
He let out an amused huff. “Not as much as I had expected, but… Yeah, it was pretty boring. Worth it, though.”
“You’re happy then?” Even before he answered, she knew; the gentle smile gracing his face easily out-shone the last rays of the glorious sunset reflecting off the water before them.
“Yes. I’m happy. Really, and truly.”
“I’m glad. After everything, you deserve to be.”
He turned to face her. “So do you.”
“I am.” And she was. …Wasn’t she? But if she was telling the truth, why did her words feel so much like a lie?
Heading back to school felt strange for reasons Aki couldn’t comprehend. She hadn’t wanted to be here in the first place; leaving again should be a relief. But she couldn’t stop turning the same question over and over in her head.
Are you happy?
She was the one who had asked it, but he had turned it back on her, and she had felt uncomfortable ever since. And she couldn’t figure out why. She loved everything about her life now, and her studies, and where she was living. Everything was perfect.
So why wouldn’t that thought leave her alone?
As she found a seat in the terminal to wait for her boarding call, she had plenty of time to think everything over.
She had told him she was happy, and she was. But when she had come back home, a shadow had descended and hadn’t really left the entire time she had been here. If she were honest, sometimes a ghost of that darkness encroached on her even while at the university, wrapping its icy fingers around her, but when she was there and not here, that apparition had been far easier to shrug off and leave behind. She had hoped to leave it behind entirely when she left to study abroad, but it had followed her against her will. Leaving the city hadn’t allowed her to outrun her past the way she had hoped. The distance had helped, to be sure, but the weight was still there, clinging on for dear life, no matter how hard she tried to shake it off.
But Yusei -- Yusei was thriving. Despite the past he could never completely leave behind, he seemed to be completely at peace now. He had stayed in the city he loved that had caused him so much pain, and somehow…
Somehow he had ended up better off for it.
The traitorous voice in the back of her mind gave her the answer: You ran away. You’re still running. He didn’t.
The truth hurt sometimes, and the irony of the situation was not lost on her. He had faced his past head-on and found the future; she was locked into a mad sprint with her past hot on her heels, moving too quickly for her future to ever come fully into focus.
She had been running for so long that it had never occurred to her to stop.
Taking a deep breath and letting it slowly back out again, she decided this wasn’t the time or the place to figure out a solution. (When that time and place would occur, she didn’t know, but right now, she didn’t want to deal with it. The irony. Regardless…)
Instead of dwelling on a problem she couldn’t currently fix, she pulled out her phone and opened the little-used group chat.
Aki: did you guys know there are three new duel lanes in Satellite?
Several people are typing…
She grinned. Since she had an hour until her flight still, she may as well cause a little mayhem.