Work Text:
Numi's POV
I blinked awake from the blinding light from the broken blind in my room. I roll over to look at her sleeping but am met with an empty pillow and the face of my hentai body pillow staring back at me. It's been a month since I saw her in Japan, but it's been longer since she was sleeping next to me. I'm still not used to her not being here. Slowly, I sit up in my bed bringing my knees to my chest and folding my arms around them. I tell the Noombas how much I miss her every chance I get, and we still talk every day, but it just doesn't fill the void with being able to just hold her. She said she might be very busy in the coming months, so I am scared that means we won't talk, but you know, maybe it's good that we get space, maybe it's good that she has other things to do. I rest my chin on my arm as an alarm on my phone goes off reminding me I need to go to the gym. I slide my legs down and climb out of bed to get ready. I pulled open my cupboard and pulled out gym clothes and the hoodie that she wore. I then shower and brush my teeth, then get dressed. While I am in the car, I take a whiff of the hoodie. It still smells like her, but it's going to need to be replenished soon.
While working out, I check my messages and, sure enough, there it is the good morning and good night message followed up by a meme or photo of cute animals. A smile impulsively appears on my face as I read through it. She makes me so happy, especially when she's being cute like this. I stared a bit at the photo she sent, reading the caption aloud, "You never fail to amaze me. Every day there is something new that makes me love you even more than the day before." With a kitten showing its belly, my face is a little warmer now and my smile is wider. I shake my head and keep working out with a gigantic smile on my face. One of the guys here is looking at me weirdly as if I am a psycho, guess my smile was too wide. I head to the locker room, pull on my hoodie and take my bag out of the locker and leave. I get back home, shower again and get changed into more comfy clothes and I start typing out the message I want to send her. I also find the appropriate memes I want to send in case I get too sappy. I lay there for a bit, staring at the ceiling, remembering the mornings where we'd cuddle right after I went to the gym. Her head buried in my neck, our legs wrapped together. Fuck I miss her.
I sit up and message Tonki and start rambling about not being sure how I was going to deal with Michi being so busy during these next two months. "I don't know Toni. I really miss having her here. I miss waking up and seeing her face. Is that weird? Am I being too clingy? SADGBFJGAGFAGHFASDKFHASKJHISLKDFNUO? Am I? I maybe it'll be a good thing that she is busy. Then it gives her some space from me and my clinginess. What do you think we should do another tarot reading because, you know, last time it said we needed to take space and I want to see if the cards still think that is what we need what if it says something worse? You know what, never mind, let's not do the tarot reading. I don't want to piss off the cards or gods." It's late in the Philippines, so she probably won't respond for a few hours? I know that, yet I stare at the messages and wait for her response. I jam my phone in my pocket, missing it twice, then I hurriedly head to the studio and slam the door, locking myself in and start to write music. I know that I have a collab with Bao, Yuzu, Tricky, Lucy, Giri and Shoto tomorrow, so at least I'll have a distraction that I can focus on.
Michi's POV
It's weird waking up in a different bed. I'm still used to waking up to her staring at me with that goofy smile across her face. I eat a little bit and take my medication and sit in silence for about ten minutes. It's weird that I miss her just being there when I do this. Her just sitting there, my hand in hers, as I stare blankly at the world for a bit. I look at the spoon she made me nailed to the wall and I get that stupid smile again. I can't believe she made that for me without knowing what it meant. She's so cute and silly. I need to check if she messaged me gotta do the dailies as always. I scroll through my notifications frantically searching for her message, but there is nothing. I open Discord on my PC just to check and see if I need to fix my VPN. No, it's not that I can see everything from everyone else. I clicked on the chat my message had sent, but no reply. Did I do something did I say something? I started to reread the message I sent to make sure that I didn't just drop a nuke and go to sleep again, but no, it's not that. I then look at the meme I sent. Maybe it was a meme. Let me delete it. I have a better one, a cuter one. I find the meme and send it after deleting the other one. Only then do I see Do Not Disturb and the status that follows reads: "I am going to be isolating myself for a bit, sorry for doing this again, but I need it."
Right she mentioned needing time away. It's been about two weeks now and her communication has been dwindling. She even sometimes only sends me one-word responses. I guess that meant everyone except for the Roomies and Tonki. I hope she's okay. I really do. I stare at the screen waiting for her to say something, hoping for even the smallest response. I hear a ping and I snap back to reality a message from Mata. We have a collab later. Why is she messaging me now? I open the DM, "Michi, are you okay the collab started five minutes ago?" shit I wiped my eyes, noticing only now that, at some point, I had started to cry. I quickly set upstream and go live, opting for a Chibi model and joining the call with Mata, Zen, Geega, and Ama. "Hi guys, sorry I lost track of time," I say. After joining the call. I looked over at the chat and greeted them by mustering as much whimsy as I could. We play a horror game that Zen zennapped us into again and, honestly, it's the distraction I needed. We play for around three hour. Mata calls me right after we end, and we talk catching up on some stuff that has happened in the past month. "Are you okay if you seem a bit off?" She asks. Her kind tone makes me want to just rant and say everything I am feeling instead of what I say is, "Yeah, I am good. I just got distracted looking at the pictures of my US trip. I also spent a while trying to write the perfect good morning message for Numi." I hear Mata release some air, and she reminds me that she is there if I ever need to talk about anything. I smile, she can't see it, but it's there, and tell her that I know and will make sure to talk if I need it.
I talk to chat for a bit and we do some reacting. Then there's a clip of Numi talking to Bao, Yuzu and Lucy. The clip starts with Numi talking about how she has been isolating herself from people. The other three chime in with a collective "Really? You've been texting us a lot more recently." I don't realise it, but I let out an audible "Oh." Chat starts spamming that Mata had seen the clip and thought I had too. So it was me. She could have told me I would have understood. Would I have understood? Does she think she can't tell me things? am I that unbalanced? She's going to abandon me like everyone else. She said she would never do that. Did she lie about that? I feel my eyes sting as tears start to roll down my cheeks. Fuck WHIMSY WHIMSY WHIMSY WHIMSY. I open my mouth to talk, but I can't. I hear the discord call sound, and it's Ferro. I answer, and he tells me to stop reacting and take a second.
I mumble that I will do that and mute my mic while I head off to the bathroom to wash my face and breathe. I feel the ring she made me and remember that day at the aquarium. She was so nervous and cute, her face a little flush. She never let go of my hand, no matter how sweaty it got. I remember us watching the fish in the tunnel when she gave it to me. Her hands shook as she explained that she had made it by hand and that she had VODs that I could watch of the process. That memory made me smile, but now all it does is hurt. I can't keep streaming like this. I need to handle this. I straightened up and headed to my PC and told Ferro I was going to end stream, my voice still shaky and fresh tears running down my face. I click end stream and stare at my wallpaper and, before I know it, I am typing a message to Numi. I hit send after a moment's hesitation. I put my Discord on Do Not Disturb and start working. I can do something about that. I can focus on that and deal with everything else later. I don't want to feel that right now.
Numi's POV
It's almost been a month since Michi's projects started. I hope she's doing okay. I have been giving her space. I take a breath. I've gotten used to waking up alone, but I still miss her being in my space or just feeling her hand in mine. The problem now, though, is that we haven't spoken at all for a week now, and I am not dealing with it well. I wonder if she's doing okay. I should call her. No, maybe it's better to give her space. Tonki said that we could do a reading today and that she would call me in a bit. The past week has been me venting to Hami and Tonki about how much I miss her, and how much I wish she were here right now. How every single day we don't talk. I am getting more and more frantic. I have to talk to her soon. I miss my Michi. I get a notification from Tonki and I rush to my PC. I answer her DM. She calls. We start by talking, and she tells me that she doesn't think Michi is doing well. She starts talking about her day, but I have zoned out, and I scroll through my Discord to find Michi. There are four notifications. I set Do Not Disturb to ping me if she messages me. Why didn't it? I opened the message to a paragraph from her.
I started reading it aloud, "You know if you just wanted to not be around me, you could have told me that I think I would have understood. I thought you were self-isolating to help with some stuff you were going through. I found out through chat and a clip that, no, you just don't want me around anymore. I was going to be busy for the next two months, but that never meant you and I weren't going to talk every day. I understand that you don't want me around. Just please tell me I don't want to find out from a clip of you and your friends. I love you and I miss you. I hope you are doing well even though you aren't going to read this or reply." I stare at the message and Tonki has also gone quiet. What is she talking about? Clip with my friends... The message is a week old. Hold on, let me check Deejay and the others. It's none of them. "Numi, I'll send you a clip from her channel to her reaction. I think I know what she is talking about," Tonki says," I can hear her typing and I see the clip pop up. I watch it and laugh when Ferro loses his shit on the mods for approving the clip when there is more context to it. Michi comes back. Her voice is very shaky, and she just says Bye, guys and ends the stream. I hang up the call with Tonki and immediately pull my phone out to call Michi.
I hear a few beeps, then the phone starts ringing. I hear it click and her voice comes through in a whisper, "Numi, why are you calling me on my phone?" she asks. "You are on Do Not Disturb on Discord and I didn't want you to miss the call because, um... we need to talk because I think we had a massive misunderstanding." I say my voice cracking a little. Holy shit it's so good to hear her voice. "I am in a meeting right now. I will have to call you back, is that okay?" she asks, her voice clearer and louder. "Oh okay, I'll turn off Do Not Disturb, so I will actually get notified when you call. I love you," I hear the phone click as the call ends. She didn't say it back. She is in a meeting, so I get it, but maybe I deserve that. After about an hour, she calls me. This time she is louder." Hi Numi, what did you want to talk about?" Her tone is very measured. It's almost like it was a business call. I told her about that her, Hami, Tonki and some friends were on my whitelist though it looks like an update broke it. When I finish talking she's quiet for a bit. When she does talk her voice is noticeably softer, but still measured. I reassure her that I would never abandon her, nor would I want her to never be around me. I explain the clip and show her the full version from Deejay. After what she had seen I start mopping about her being gone, and how much I miss her. I hear her chuckle. Saved I hope.
She starts talking about the two months she was going to be busy and expresses how she was never planning on not talking to me during that time. She talks about her and some of the Ex-VSJ girls getting to do an IRL meet and greet soon at some of the US conventions with Gamer Supps. I listen to her talk about how they managed to get Zen to agree but only if she could be in full cosplay. Mousey would be well enough to at least say hello, but not much else just yet. She said they would all help her out with that until she is well enough to be able to do more. I start thinking, but you are sick too. I start asking how her treatments have been going and how she is doing. She starts off by saying that the treatments have been going well. Though she did say she had lost around seven kilograms even though she has been eating daily. I feel my eye twitch a little and take a deep breath. I ask how long she is going to be staying in the US for the cons. She pauses and says, "Well, um... the thing is, I needed a work visa, so... around three to six months... I have a B&B booked, so um... don't worry about that." Her voice is very shaky and keeps cracking. I feel my jaw tighten a little. She wasn't going to tell me that she was coming... Did she think the Noombas and 4Skins wouldn't talk about it or that I wouldn't be at one of them and see her? "So your plan was to come to the U.S. not tell me, book a B&B, stay in the U.S. for three to six months and do convention Meet and Greets. That I will likely be a part of or at least aware of." I say the annoyance filling every word. "I uh... didn't want to intrude especially for that long." she says more unsure.
"You are telling me I could have you with me for six whole months? Do you have someone to drive you to treatments while here, someone to drive you to the doctor at any time if needed? Why would you think you would be intruding when, the last time you were here, I told you I wanted you to be here longer. We even talked about you staying for six months for the first time!" I am trying to plead with her. I hear her get a bit flustered and start frantically typing. I ask her what she is doing, and she replies, cancelling the B&B I booked. We talked about plans for getting her medication. Setting up a doctor to help with treatments that she needs. I plan the things we can do between the conventions. We plan our hotel rooms for the other conventions in different states. I let Hami and Avery know that she is going to be coming. We even talk about setting up a place where she can set up her PC so she can stream more. I tell her that she is not allowed to sleep anywhere else, because I barely got used to her not being beside me. We spend the night talking until I fell asleep on call. The last thing I hear as I fall asleep is, "I love you."
Michi'S POV
Today is the day that I fly to the US. I've packed everything I can think of. I spoke with the US psychiatrist along with my current psychiatrist. I also spoke with my other doctor, and he spoke to the one in the US. That at least means my meds and treatment are sorted. Numi talked about picking me up from the airport again. I am excited to see her again. I wonder how it will feel to be back in her home again. I wonder how she will feel when I have been there for more than a month. I am scared that she will grow to hate me. I know she tells me that she won't, but it always feels like it is only a matter of time before something about me pisses her off. I made some plans for someone to house sit for me.
There are people coming today to pack up my PC to ship it to her house. I am watching the time while I wait for them. I hear the door click open. It's Ollie and my mom. They see me sitting on my couch. I stand and rush over to hug my mom, and then Ollie. I show Ollie the office so she can stream while she's here. As we finish, I hear a ring at the door and quickly go to check. It's the people that are going to ship my PC. I take them to it. They take less than an hour and are off. My mom looks like she is about to cry. I am going to be gone for half a year. It's going to be hard to not see her and my dad as frequently as possible. I told her that we could call and text everyday. I am going to miss spending my free time with them. Ollie looks excited, and I remind her that if she does get busy to let me know and Kuro can take over. Ollie smiles and nods. I know it's a lot to ask. She is probably going to be very busy soon, and I want her to know it's okay if she can't help.
I pack my carry-on, making sure I have the essentials. Ollie has already left and gone home. I did set up a group so that it would be easy to communicate with everyone. It's already nine pm. My mom and I leave locking the house behind me. We drive to the airport, the road a blur. As we arrive, I give my mom a big hug before I check in. I tell her I'll miss her and will bring back souvenirs for her and dad. I walk through the gate my heart heavy, but also excitement at seeing my friends again. I hope I get to see more of where she grew up and do things she likes.
Once I have boarded the plane, I try to get as comfy as I can before take-off. I take out gum, a charger cable, and headphones. I switch my phone to aeroplane mode. I feel the plane lurch, and we start taxing down the runway. I fasten my seatbelt and put a piece of gum in my mouth. The plane picks up speed, and we lift off the ground and are flying. Once we reach altitude, I look through some of the movies. Superman, Fantastic Four and a few other newer movies are there. People said Superman was good, so I pick it. Eventually we arrived at our layover in Tokyo. It goes by quickly and in two hours we are boarding again and off. About an hour after take-off, they bring us our food and I then take my medication. I fell asleep listening to one of Numi's Vods. Soon I will be back in the US.
ARRIVAL MULTI-POV
The wheels of the plane touching tarmac jolt me awake. I hear the rest of the cabin erupt in applause and cheers. We come to a full stop. Still groggy, I unbuckle my seatbelt and start to collect my things. My seat neighbour seems to have helped me by putting my phone on charge. I picke it up, unlock it and turn aeroplane mode off. My phone instantly starts to ping. I find my mum and tell her that I have landed safely. I then check for Numi's message and see a little paragraph followed by a photo of a sign with my name on it. The caption on it says, "Can't dox you this way." I chuckle and read the paragraph and make the effort to reply to her properly. I also let her know that we are going to be departing the plane soon, and I'll find her after baggage collection. Everyone in my row takes turns grabbing their carry-ons. Once I have mine, I slide in to join the mass of people exiting the plane.
As I step outside I have to squint my eyes at the midday sun beating down on us. I didn't realise that the cabin was that dark. My vision now momentarily impaired by the sun, I walk towards baggage claim. I am constantly watching the surrounding police, scared that they might decide that I shouldn't be here for whatever reason. I wait by the conveyor belt watching as bag after bag passes until I see one of mine and grab it. Now time for round two of catch the bag. This round lasts significantly less time and I grab it and head off to TSA. They inspect my bags, x-ray them and ask some questions. I answer, and they find nothing wrong with my luggage, and I am free to go. As I pass through the sliding door of arrivals, I start scanning for her.
I arrived at the airport a little earlier than planned, but that's not important because I am here. I look up at the times and try to find her flight. Oh, she hasn't landed yet. Great. I have time to get to the gate. While I am at it, I grab a coffee from one of the stores. I made sure I spelt her name right. I don't want to hold up a sign with her Vtuber name and dox her. While I am in the store, I see someone selling bouquets of flowers. They are a nice purple with little black dots on the petals as if it had little beauty marks. I walk over and ask the lady how much. She smiles and just hands it to me and says, "I hope she loves them." I smile and say thank you. I drop a twenty dollar tip in her bucket and rush off to the arrival gates. I pull out my phone and see a paragraph from her followed by," We are getting off now. I'll see you soon." I finish my coffee and throw it in a trashcan. I then read her paragraph. I think about replying, but would rather say what I want to say to her face.
I get to the gate and hold up my sign. I stand to the right in the open so she can hopefully see me as soon as she gets out. I get a few looks from some of the people waiting alongside me. One of the guys walks up to me and asks who I am waiting for. Without a thought, I say, "My wife." He nods his head then keeps hovering nearby. I started to feel a little self-conscious about the outfit I wore. Is she going to hate it or does it look good? I am wearing a tan turtleneck, with dark blue jeans and a hoodie. Though the hoodie is for her, not me. I also have my vans on and barely any makeup. It's been what feels like an eternity before the first person walks through the gate. I watch as people pass by, my stomach tightening as I watch them walk past me. I lift my sign higher, hoping that she sees it easier. The guy who has been hovering decides that it's a good time to try to strike another conversation with me. I ignore him and keep scanning the faces in the crowd trying to pick her out.
There. I see her. I rush forward. I timed everything perfectly this time. I jump. I catch her and feel her legs wrapped around my waist. We stay there for what feels like forever. Locked in an embrace. I don't want to let go. I look at her face, smiling so wide. I can see the Joy in her eyes and that goofy smile...