Chapter Text
A feeling of faint unease had been plaguing the edges of Leafy's mind.
She was able to carry out her tasks, just as normal, but the spindles of anxiousness kept brushing against her everyday thoughts and tainting them with worry.
And that's itself was okay! Off days like this were even quite common for the leaf, and she had learned how to suppress her emotions quite convincingly. When a mean comment or a hostile glance came her way, Leafy would simply push away the sadness to the back of her mind and bottle it away. Neat little bottles of upset, that she would never let out.
Because she was nice.
And nice objects didn't let anyone know they had bad days. Nice objects should be nothing but nice.
But today- for once in her life- Leafy was close to unable to shove the fog back. And that was for one simple reason. Leafy didn't know why it was there.
It shouldn't be a reason. It shouldn't be a problem. But when these times of wilting and gloom engulfed the leaf, she was able to easily come to terms with it.
Someone on the street gave her an unfriendly look? There was her reason.
A backhanded mean comment from an acquaintance? That could be what caused her thoughts to go down this path.
But now, it was so different. Nothing bad had happened today, she had simply woken up with this feeling of utter uneasiness that she couldn't shake.
Leafy had tried everything she normally did, and attempted to go about her day as usual.
The lemon leaf had woken up, drank a glass of water mixed with a few drops of honey, (A habit Leafy had was being unable to eat or drink certain things without them being sweet in some way, Pin had guessed this was to do with her being a plant object.) and gone downstairs to talk with Pin.
Pin.
The mere thought of her girlfriend was enough to make Leafy smile slightly, and that slightly lifted the fog.
Pin, Leafy's darling girlfriend, could never fail to make her feel slightly better. Leafy couldn't imagine anything in the world that could compare to the beauty and strength of the red pushpin.
Leafy gripped her glass of water in her hand as she quickly descended the small staircase to the living room. Unsurprisingly, Pin was already awake. She was in the kitchen, and by the sound of sizzling and the smell of some kind of breakfast, it seemed that she had been eager to make some food and start the day earlier than usual. The pair were early risers anyway, often waking up before the sun fully crested over the quiet breeze of the fields and the birds started their lovely morning songs. It was the kind of place Leafy had grown to love, in their small home, off and away from the world, and nestled in a corner of the countryside of Goiky that lacked the sounds of bustling objects or traffic.
Another reason they were so far away, was because no one had quite forgiven Leafy for what she had done. Stealing Dream Island? It was the kind of mistake that she could never atone for in the eyes of other objects. Well, at the very least the previous contestants of bfdi forgave her… for the most part. And it's not like Leafy would ever go to Dream Island again- the further away that place was from her the better.
Pin must have picked up on Leafy's descent from the top floor, and she poked her head around the doorway of the kitchen. The thumbtack smiled, and waved Leafy over. That smile, it made Leafy's heart jump into her chest. No matter what anxiety had decided to annoyingly settle in her today, she still didn't think she would ever lose the little spark that illuminated in her at the sight of her utterly perfect girlfriend.
“Leafy!” Pin called out, in that familiar accented voice.
“Hey Pin!” Leafy quickly called back, taking a few steps forward to her girlfriend, and greeting her with a tight hug that Pin recorporated firmly, slightly nuzzling into Leafy's shoulder with a small purr. Pin smelled faintly of sugar and vanilla from her work in the kitchen, and it contrasted her usual citrus scent that matched Leafy's.
All too soon for Leafy's liking, the two pulled away and Pin led Leafy into the kitchen. The lemon leaf took a seat on the small wooden table, and nudged the curtains open slightly more to allow the warm orange morning sunlight to filter into the room. The sun simply soaking into Leafy's body instantly lifted her anxiety even more, though an undertone still remained. Oh well, she could easily pretend today. Even if she still had to deal with these feelings, no one else needed to know. They didn't need to worry. Pin didn't need to worry.
Speaking of which, the pushpin had immediately gone back into her frenzy of mixing and turning knobs on the oven, already engrossed in her activity again. Leafy already knew how much Pin loved to bake things like cakes and cookies, all sorts of pastries, and she did it regularly for Leafy. It was always a nice thing for Leafy to wake up to, seeing Pin so instantly doing something she loved.
“Sooo, what ‘ya making there, Pinster?” Leafy questioned after a few moments of relative silence. In that time, Leafy had also started shivering from the cold.
Pin quickly whipped around, and grinned. “So glad you asked!” She exclaimed, pausing her rapid stirring momentarily, and leaning up against the counter. “I'm making pancakes again, and before you ask, I know I also made them yesterday, but they turned out all flat and gross looking.” Sticking out her tongue, Pin frowned in displeasure and continued stirring, the sounds of the whisk nearly drowning out the faint sounds of chirping birds outside.
Leafy stifled a small chuckle, and took a sip of water. That was her Pin alright, defensive even before Leafy could critique her. Not that the leaf ever would, unless worst came to worst. As long as Leafy was watching her beloved do something she enjoyed, the outcome wouldn't matter to her.
There were few objects Leafy could feel this way about. Needless to say, Leafy was very critical. She saw it fit that niceness came hand in hand with honesty, no matter how brutal, and she would fairly judge anyone she saw fit before dealing with them appropriately.
But when it came to Pin, Leafy never felt that way.
She laid her glass on the smooth oak table again. “I wasn't going to ask that.” She protested.
Pin half-turned around again, a skeptical expression settling on her face. “Oh, sure. Well, in that case I hope you like pancakes because this will probably take me a few tries to get right.”
“I do!” Exclaimed Leafy. “But, with all due respect, master baker, I have to go grab something.” A mock proper tone washed over Leafy's voice as she rose to her feet. “I'll be right back!”
Pin hummed quietly and nodded, still smiling and focused on her work, and leaving Leafy to quickly make her way to the living room, eager to get back to Pin.
It was the end of winter, only just bordering onto spring, and the house the pair lived in had utterly terrible heating. Pin, being a plastic object and just rather tough in general, was more resistant to the cold air than Leafy. Though in contrast to her partner, during winter Leafy found it much more difficult to stay warm- she normally ended up layering blanket upon blanket on top of herself, or cuddling with Pin more often for the heat that emitted from her.
After coming downstairs, cold had begun nipping at the lemon leaf. She reluctantly decided it was best to go grab one of her winter scarves from the closet- normally she would only get them out during mid-winter or late autumn, but spring was seeming to bloom late this year, and frost was persistently covering the blades of grass outside that couldn't seem to be shaken off.
She opened the closet door, and rummaged around inside for a while, trying to find what she was looking for, before a small detail caught her eye. Pushed far to the back of the closet- partly obscured by a vary of coats and trinkets- lay a large white board. Part of it was concealed by hung up clothes, but from what she could see it had names and numbers listed onto it, with one name sitting clearly at the top. Her own name.
It was her niceness chart.
Years had passed since she had used this. In fact, so long that she had nearly forgotten it existed. Leafy had, at a point, just embraced the fact that as long as she was the nicest object in the world she didn't need a list.
She knew that herself and Pin would always be at the top anyway, so what was the point in keeping track of the rest?
But now- seeing it again after so long- Leafy felt somewhat intrigued.
She reached in and grabbed the chart from the back of the closet, laying it gently on the ground in front of her. Leafy's heart had started to beat faster, and she tried to ignore the part of her brain screaming at her to put this nasty chart back. A small layer of dust had settled on the old thing, and Leafy blew it off before coughing a few times. Hey gaze wandered around lazily to the rest of the names, before staring at the top slot again.
‘#0.5- Leafy.’
Her gaze was fixed on the words. Yes. That was correct. Leafy was the nicest.
She was.
Her body had started trembling now.
She had always thought so.
Now, seeing all the names below, seeing Pin below, Leafy couldn't quash her sense of doubt. Could she really confidently say she was nicer than someone like Pin? Even someone like Firey?
Perhaps not.
—
The day had passed like usual for Pin. Leafy had returned as though nothing happened, her usual bright smile ever lasting upon her face, and the pair had carried on their daily tasks.
But Pin could still tell. She could tell something was off.
Leafy was almost never open fully about her feelings, but Pin could still sense when something had upset her. It was written in how Leafy would stare off at nothing when the two were having conversations, and act more clingy than usual around Pin. The whole day Leafy had practically been stuck to her side, during the afternoon's chores, and when they went to the city to restock on groceries. Pin didn't mind this, in fact she found it endearing, but what she did mind was what- or who- was bothering Leafy.
And more importantly how she could fix it.
Fixing issues was what Pin was meant for. It's what she should be doing at all times, as far as she was concerned.
She didn't think Leafy knew Pin was aware of when something upset her, and Pin knew that if the leaf did she would only feel worse. She knew how much Leafy hated bringing down her friends, so she needed to be careful not to unintentionally cause Leafy to spiral further.
Soon enough, the day was nearing a close. Leafy's behaviors had only become more prominent, and it was causing Pin to worry. Normally Leafy was able to at least good-naturedly complain about what had annoyed her during the day, but this was different. It was unlike her.
—
Outside, the night was quiet, save for the faint wind passing through the shrubbery and trees. The moon hung low in the sky, allowing the faintest of icy light to slip through the window blinds and onto the room.
The two objects were now curled up in their bed, and Leafy was snuggling softly into Pin's side. It was comforting to the pushpin to be close like this- it always made her feel better to know she was trusted. She was the leader, she should be trusted, obviously! But It was a nice feeling to have earned the trust from someone she loved rather than to simply demand it.
Pin had just begun drifting off into a light sleep, before the unsure murmur of Leafy broke her out of it.
“Pin?” Sitting up slightly, Leafy glanced up at her partner, her gaze tainted with worry and nervousness.
Pin was instantly alert, and she smiled down at the leaf.
“Yeah? What's up, Leafster?”
Leafy remained quiet momentarily, and Pin picked up on her fiddling with the blanket in her hands as though something was stressing her. After a few moments, she inhaled slowly and replied.
“Im… nice, right?”
That question was so uncalled for- and frankly out of character- that Pin had to suppress a small scoff. Was Leafy nice? That was as dumb as asking if the sky was blue! Corkboard, what could have possibly happened to make Leafy unsure of that glaringly obvious fact?
Pin embraced leafy slightly tighter in her arms.
“You're the nicest object in the world- no- the universe Leafy! I don't know who's made you feel his way, but trust me, you don't need to-”
“No one said anything to me!” Leafy cut her off. “Pin, you must know by now that I don't let those idiots get to me. That would be borderline embarrassing! It's just…”
Leafy fell silent again, now frowning as her gaze averted from Pin. She sighed out a breath of air slowly.
“I'm not sure. How does one even define nice? Who's to say that I'm not just gaslighting myself into thinking that I'm the nicest?”
Ah. Well, for how good of a leader Pin may be, her brain sure did go utterly blank when it came to comforting. What could she say? Was she sure that whatever she said wouldn't just make Leafy feel worse, even by accident? Pin knew how… harsh she could often come off, though she never acted that way around Leafy, and she knew how mentally (and physically) fragile her girlfriend was. But still- she was sure that if she said anything she would just mess it all up even more.
No- no that wasn't okay! Pin needed to be capable of this- she needed to be perfect! Just as a leader should be!
“Leafy…You really don't need to worry so much.” Pin started slowly. “I know how much this- er- matters to you but… Well for one, it's easy to say you're the nicest object I know! And even if somehow, somehow, you weren't then… That's fine too!”
The end of that sentence caused leafy to nearly bolt upright, causing Pin to flinch back, and she planted a defiant gaze on Pin. That made her wince. “It is NOT fine! That's the furthest from fine anything can be- i thought you would know that by now! If I'm not the best at this one sole thing I'm capable of, how can I be worthy of anything? No less, how can I be worthy of you?” Once Leafy started talking, her words were like a flowing waterfall that couldn't be stopped- Pin could do nothing but stare in dismay as the leaf continued. Worthy of Pin? Did leafy…doubt that she deserved her? She didn't like that idea, and she quickly shoved it away. Though Leafy's spiralling sentences were still going on.
“I wonder if anyone even views me that way besides you. To them I probably just seem like an insecure trainwreck who can't deal with the fact I can never be forgiven for my mistakes. Maybe that is all I am- hah, first place on the chart indeed…” She trailed off in a bitter and sarcastic mutter near the end, and hugged her legs close to her.
Pin was still at a loss for words. Nothing had prepared her for… this. This sudden onslaught of emotions caught her off guard completely, and she had to endure a few moments of silence as she fumbled for some words of reassurance, or something, anything that she could… wait. What had leafy said near the end… ‘First place on the chart’?
Ah.
Suddenly, things became a lot more clear to Pin.
"You're thinking about the list again?” Pin asked softly, lowering her head slightly to look into Leafy's eyes. They were sad, and watering up slightly, which made Pin feel even more guilty. Leafy shouldn't have to this way when Pin was here. Hah- what a leader she was.
Leafy nodded slightly, the smallest movement of her head.
Pin sighed.
“Leafy, I really don't think you should worry about this. That much is true- but at the same time- I'll do everything in my power to make you feel deserving of being the nicest. And as you know, I have a lot of power. Like a lot. A lot lot. It's actually pretty impressive-” Pin quickly stopped herself before she could go on a tangent about how amazing she was. That probably wasn't what Leafy would want right now.
But it was true- Pin would do anything to secure Leafy's confidence, and by extension, her happiness. Though- Pin still couldn't quite wrap her head around it. Even after all these years, Pin didn't understand why Leafy, well… cared so much. In Pins eyes, so what if people hated her? So what if everyone hated everyone else, even? As long as Pin could protect Leafy, and continue to lead and boss everyone around efficiently, sappy emotions didn't matter. As long as Leafy liked her, everyone else who didnt could- for lack of a better phrase- go fuck themselves.
But if Leafy cared, then automatically Pin cared too.
Leafy was still quiet.
“And hey,” Pin continued, more softly. “You know what? I'm sure I'm not the only object who can vouch for the fact that you're the nicest, sweetest, prettiest,” Pin winked with that word, causing a small smile to tug at the corner of Leafy's mouth. “Object in the whole world.”
After another short pause, Leafy finally spoke up.
“Yeah, thanks Pin. Im- uh- Im really glad to have you, you know. And I'm sorry that I waste your time like this.”
“Don't be sorry!” Pin quickly leaned in and embraced leafy, before pulling away and planting a small kiss on her cheek. “It’s what I'm here to do.”
—
Though the night ended on that note, Pin was still shaken from all of a sudden hearing all of Leafy's concealed thoughts practically laid out before her. Even after Leafy fell asleep last night, her breath slow, and her fragile form snuggled up against Pin, the thumbtack still remained awake, staring at the ceiling and thinking. Thinking of a solution, a way she could fix things.
An idea crossed her mind in a fairly short amount of time of pondering; Pin was good at thinking. She was smart, at least smart in a problem solving kind of way. She was good at thinking of solutions quickly, whilst leafy was the one who could plot ahead to better influence things for her gain.
Now, Pin had at least one idea to solve this issue. One thing that could maybe be… A start. A small nudge to get Leafy's thoughts right again.