Chapter Text
***
What if, after years
of trial,
a love should come
and lay a hand upon you
and say,
this late,
your life is not a crime
Sudden Hymn in Winter - Joseph Fasano
***
The Summoner wandered around the castle yard where the sun shining from a cloudless sky cast its warming rays on people. She saw heroes clashing swords at the training grounds. A group of kids ran past her chasing a dog. Soldiers on a patrol greeted her.
So many people, but so far she hadn’t had any luck in finding the person she was looking for.
The castle gates opened, and Ike and his mercenaries passed through them, chatting happily with each other.
Eden waved at them in greeting and the group waved back at the Summoner. She had sent them on a quest to dispatch bandits bothering the villages near the southern border. It was a relief to see them all return in one piece, but she would expect nothing less from such an experienced mercenary band.
“Everything alright?” Eden asked.
“Yes. Everything went great,” Ike replied. “There were a lot of bandits, but they weren’t much of a challenge.”
“That’s good to hear. Go get some rest. You can give your report to Commander Anna later.”
Ike waved a salute and the group continued on their way. Oscar and Titania headed towards the stables with their horses while the rest marched towards the castle, no doubt in search of Commander Anna. Ike wouldn’t wait until later to finish the task.
Eden smiled and continued her own mission. She stopped by two of the Order’s soldiers who were doing weapon maintenance.
“Hi. Have you seen Líf anywhere?”
The soldiers glanced at each other.
“The skeleton guy?”
“We saw him head to the forest about an hour ago.”
“I didn’t ask why though and didn’t really care either. Better if he’s out of the castle if you ask me.”
Eden sighed. Many people in the Order struggled with getting used to Hel’s former general being now in their ranks. Some concealed their distaste better than others, but Eden noticed it nonetheless. She couldn’t blame them after all the chaos and destruction he sowed only a few months prior, but her hopeful wish was that they could all get along. Building trust took time, and Líf hadn’t been particularly eager to work on his part of it. That was one of the reasons Eden was now looking for him.
“Thanks for the info,” she said and headed out of the gates.
“Be careful out there. You never know with him,” one of the guards shouted after her.
Eden waved her hand as an acknowledgement of his words. She knew what she was doing.
It took a while before Eden got to Líf’s track. The forests surrounding the castle spread in all directions, and the guards hadn’t been helpful. But after wandering around a while, she heard noises that sounded promising. Eden hurried her steps.
The sounds of whacks and swishes and cracking wood grew louder as did the grunts and shouts. Eden had to duck when a flock of birds flew past her in panicked haste. Either CHOP was comparing their axes or a certain swordsman was training out here.
Soon Eden reached a clearing. Cut down trees scattered the area. A heavy fur cape hung on the branches of a tree that had been spared from the slaughter, and Eden pushed herself past it to see, as she had expected, Líf swinging his heavy sword, slashing it into a tree. The wood cracked and splintered as the blade cut cleanly through it. Branches snapped and nearby trees groaned when the tree crashed to the ground.
“What did these poor trees do to you?” Eden asked.
Líf whirled around, sword pointing directly at Eden’s throat. Only the distance between them kept Eden from flinching, and even then just barely.
Líf’s eyes were wide from surprise, but he relaxed when he recognized the Summoner and lowered his sword. His usual neutral expression quickly returned on his face.
“Why are you here?”
“I was looking for you.”
“Why?”
“We received reports of Embla’s activity near another gate, and we’re going to check it out tomorrow. I came to invite you to the group.”
Líf stayed quiet. He could not understand why the Summoner tried to include him in her little activities. This must’ve been the seventh or eighth time she had approached him since she had summoned him a month ago. Why? Why didn’t she hate him for everything he had done? The question burned on the top of his tongue but remained unspoken.
“Is this another one of your attempts to socialize me?” he asked instead.
Eden chuckled softly. “Possibly.”
“You’re wasting your efforts. It’s best for everyone if I don’t engage with them. I doubt they would want to work with me.”
“You can’t know if you don’t try.”
“Many of them openly hate me. I have seen their looks. I have heard their whispers. And I don’t blame them. Why would they want to have me here after everything I did? Why would they want to work with me?”
“It’s different now. You’re our ally. You don’t need to rule Hel’s armies anymore.”
“I don’t understand you,” Líf muttered under his breath.
“What was that?”
“You’re wasting your time. Go find someone else to join your quest.”
Eden sensed she couldn’t do anything to turn Líf’s head right now. She shrugged her shoulders.
“If you change your mind, we’re gathering at the west gate right after breakfast,” she said and turned to leave. “Oh, please don’t cut down too many trees. Mordecai really likes the squirrels living here.”
Líf stood still long after Eden had disappeared in the woods. That woman… He shook his head to push away the thought and picked up his sword. He looked at the tree trunks scattered around the area and sighed, sheathing his weapon. He grabbed his cloak from the tree branch and marched after Eden, making sure to keep enough distance between them that the Summoner wouldn’t notice him. He was not following her.
*
The sun had climbed above the castle walls. A noisy and colourful group of people had gathered near the west gate. Alfonse and Sharena stood next to the Summoner as she took out a list of names. Eden cleared her throat and the chatter quieted down.
“Klein and Inigo?” Eden called.
“Yes.”
“Professor Byleth?”
Both Byleths raised their hands.
“Byleths’ students?”
All three house leaders raised their hands, and a group of other students from all houses cheered. When Eden had asked if the professors would be available to participate in the operation, they had asked if they could bring their students. Eden had nothing against the suggestion. She often struggled assembling squads for their bigger operations. The order was filled with amazing skill, and she wanted to give people equal chances to participate instead of picking the same people every time but that came with the difficulty of choosing new people. She appreciated people volunteering themselves. It saved her from one more headache.
“Nephenee?”
As Eden continued the roll call, Alfonse’s attention shifted to the side. His neck hair stood up when he caught the eye of his alternate self in the shade of the castle wall. What was Líf doing here?
“Líf?”
Eden invited him? Why would she do that? Well, actually it made sense. She always wanted to include everyone. She reminded Alfonse of Sharena in that regard.
Eden looked around after calling out Líf’s name. Did he really not come? Then, in the corner of her eye she noticed a figure hunched in the shadows. A small smile crept on her lips and she nodded her head in greeting.
“Alright, Prince Alfonse. Everyone is here.”
Alfonse stepped forward and began briefing the squad for the day’s mission. They would march to a gate in the southwest where scouts had spotted Embla’s soldiers. They would observe the situation and dispatch the enemies to secure the gate.
“Nephenee,” Alfonse said, “I would ask you to be Eden’s personal guard today.”
“Oh, are ya.. I mean… are you sure, Your Highness?
“Quite sure Nephenee.”
“Then I’d be happy to do it.”
The march to the gate took them a better part of two hours. The squad was in good spirits, the students making the most noise bantering with each other.
Nephenee walked next to Eden, taking her job seriously from the start. Eden doubted she’d need a guard on a simple mission like this, but Alfonse always insisted on it. It was for the best even if Eden felt uncomfortable for causing worry. She couldn’t fight and the enemies were quick to take advantage of that.
After the second sneak attack on her, Alfonse had deemed it best to assign her a guard on every mission. Eden had tried to learn how to defend herself, but handling weapons didn’t come to her easily. She had managed to pick up some knowledge on self defense and carried a dagger on her waist next to Breidablik, but the little knife didn’t do much against trained soldiers or assassins.
Líf trailed behind the rest of the group, observing them quietly. Why did he decide to do this? He could not answer. Eden’s voice had stayed in his head all night. It was aggravating. He couldn’t care less about “getting along” or “making friends”, but some part of him couldn’t say no to the Summoner, not anymore. He had tried his best, but now he was on this endless march staring intently at Eden’s back, watching the movement of her hands when she gestured while talking, and feeling irritated when one of the Faerghus kids blocked him from seeing her smiling face.
When they arrived in the vicinity of the open gate, Alfonse signaled the squad to stop in the shade of trees out of clear view. The area swarmed with Emblian soldiers. There were at least fifty, maybe more. According to the Order’s knowledge, the gate led to the rural countryside somewhere in the World of Radiance, but it must’ve had value for Embla to be captured with such a force.
“That’s…more than the report said,” Alfonse said. He turned to Eden. “Your plan?”
Eden scanned the upcoming battlefield. The enemy consisted mostly of infantry soldiers and cavaliers. No fliers or armored units which was good. She hated dealing with both.
“Byleth and Byleth I want you to take your students and flank the enemy. Klein if you would once again take the archers and provide support in whichever way you see fit.”
While Eden was giving out orders for the rest of the Heroes, the Byleths divided their students into groups. One Byleth took the Blue Lions and the other one took Black Eagles. That was the natural way. The two classes didn’t mix together well, a problem the professors wanted to work on, but not on this mission.
Four students from the Golden Deer house stood around awkwardly until it was decided that Lysithea and Hilda would go with the Eagles and Marianne would join the Lions.
“What about me, Teach?” Claude asked, hands behind his head.
Eden’s attention shifted to the discussion. The two groups were even in numbers and unwilling to give the other group an advantage of one more member. Because while it wasn’t meant as a competition, students of both houses had already decided in their minds that they would have to prove themselves the better house. It was Black Eagles versus Blue Lions with a couple unfortunate Deer mixed in.
“Claude, if you want, you can also join the rest of the archers. Klein is the Archer General in his home country, so I’m sure you would be able to learn a lot from him too,” Eden said.
Klein smiled looking slightly awkward. He never got fully used to that title and considered it too grand for him. But the Summoner appreciated his skills and placed a lot of trust in him, so Klein did his best.
“I’m fine with that,” Claude said.
“Great. And Líf. You could—”
“I’ll go in by myself. Everyone else stays away.”
“I see. Well, everyone, take your positions. Alfonse signals the start of your attack.”
Eden had thought Líf could’ve advanced with Alfonse and Sharena, but if he didn’t want to, letting him do what he wanted would be better. Eden knew she could trust Líf on the battlefield, so letting him fight on his own would yield better results than forcing him to work together with other people. She could make accommodations for him since joining the party was already a big step forwards.
Alfonse took the lead of the operation, and the Heroes charged to the battlefield. Judging by the calm reaction of the Emblian soldiers, they had expected the Order to arrive. The enemy soldiers quickly fell into their own formation and clashed with the heroes.
Eden and Nephenee stayed in the shade of trees a safe distance away. Nephenee stood in attention by Eden’s side, gripping her lance tighter than Eden was used to seeing.
Eden hadn’t interacted much with the mercenary outside of seeing her on the training ground and when dealing with Ike’s mercenary band as a whole. But from the moment of Nephenee’s summoning, Eden had had a good feeling about her. She was kind and dutiful, and anyone that beautiful couldn’t be bad at heart. Eden almost envied the effortless beauty. Her chestnut brown hair was nothing compared to Nephenee’s striking light green hair. She carried herself so well, body strengthened by life in the countryside and working as a mercenary. She was a perfect combination of personality, beauty and skill. But it seemed even then Nephenee wasn’t fully confident.
“No need to be nervous,” Eden said. “Everything will be fine. My bodyguards rarely need to do anything.”
Nephenee nodded and relaxed an inch. She had participated in many battles with Ike’s mercenaries, but at this moment she felt like she was holding her lance for the first time. What if something went wrong, and it’d be her fault?
“How have you enjoyed your time here? I’m sorry I haven’t been able to talk with you much.”
“I’ve had a good time. Everyone’s been real nice to me. I’ve met some new folk too.”
“Hearing that makes me happy. Be sure to let me know if there’s something bothering you.”
“I’ll remember that. Thank you.”
Eden observed the flow of battle. The Emblian soldiers had a slight advantage in numbers, but the two Byleths on the Order’s side were worth at least three people each. Eden loved watching them fight. Witnessing talented fighters in their element was fascinating, and Byleth Eisner was no exception. The way both of them moved, dodging and striking, quickly retreating, combining their sword skills with the use of magic when the enemy got too far away. Skill and confidence oozed from their every decision.
She sought out Líf’s distinct figure from the sea of fighters. While watching him fight, Eden quickly realized why Líf going alone hadn’t been the worst idea. Líf’s sword, Sökkvabekkr was a cursed blade, a detail Eden had forgotten. Whenever the sword made contact with the enemy, a wave of dark energy blasted from it, biting into anyone in its radius, friend or foe. Eden noticed how Líf did his best to steer clear of his allies. His angry shout at Annette, who came too close, made the girl jump back in shock but saved her from being struck by the sword’s cursed energy.
Rustling from the bushes behind them caught Eden’s attention. She turned around just as an axe swung towards her. She yelped and jumped back.
“Nephenee!” She called her guard, but she was already caught up to the situation. Nephenee quickly stepped to stand in front of Eden as two soldiers emerged from the woods.
“Stay behind me,” Nephenee ordered.
Eden scanned the battlefield. They were a long distance away from the nearest soldiers. The Order had the upper hand, but Emblian soldiers put up a good fight. Calling off fighters from the battle to help them could turn the tide in Embla’s favor, especially since a large part of their squad was younger, more inexperienced Heroes that could easily get overwhelmed.
Maybe Nephenee could take the soldiers down. She was a skilled fighter. She was picked as the bodyguard for a reason.
Metal clashed against metal as Nephenee blocked the enemy’s axe with her shield. She swung her spear towards the swordsman, who tried to attack from the side. Two against one was tough even for an experienced fighter, but Nephenee knew she could’ve handled the soldiers easily if she didn’t also have to worry about protecting the Summoner.
Eden tried her best to balance between staying behind Nephenee and not being in her way, but the Emblian soldiers didn’t give them time to breathe. Eden could see Nephenee was starting to struggle. The axe-wielding soldier had an advantage over her, and the swordsman constantly tried to get past her to attack Eden.
Then the soldiers coordinated an attack that threw Nephenee off balance. She stumbled, dropping her guard. The swordsman yelled triumphantly and swung his sword to strike her.
Eden’s body moved before her brain. She pulled out the dagger from her belt and crashed against the swordfighter, stabbing her dagger in his shoulder. The soldier screamed, and slammed his elbow on Eden’s face.
Eden stumbled backwards, wrenching the dagger out. The left side of her face throbbed. The blade of her dagger dripped with blood. But Nephenee found her bearings again. The only problem was that now the swordsman was 100% focused on Eden.
“You’ll pay for that you bitch!” The soldier spat on the ground and dashed forward.
Eden yelped and ducked out of the way. After being almost killed multiple times within the first couple months after arriving to Askr, Alfonse had forced Eden to take combat lessons which resulted in her getting her dagger. However, a large part of her training consisted of dodging and deflecting attacks long enough that someone would come to her aid. On the training grounds she performed well, but in real situations, when her life was on the line, her nerves got to her and she stumbled more, struggled more, panicked more.
“Eden!” Nephenee shouted. The axe-using soldier was holding her from coming for Eden’s help. “Take this!”
Throwing away her shield might’ve been the stupidest thing Nephenee had done in a while, but she had to keep Eden safe somehow. She couldn’t protect her with her spear now that they were separated, so maybe her shield could provide her some protection. If Eden could catch it.
The shield flew through the air like the world’s heaviest frisbee, and Eden jumped out of the way before it slammed into her chest. Dodging the swordfighter’s attacks and trying to swipe back with her dagger, Eden danced closer to the shield until finally diving to pick it up.
Gritting her teeth, Eden collected her strength and raised the shield in position just in time to block an attack. The steel sword struck against the shield, and Eden’s teeth clattered. If she survived this, she would never again grumble when Alfonse called her for training.
Blocking a hit after hit Eden glanced at the battlefield again. No one had noticed her and Nephenee’s predicament. The heroes were rounding up the remaining soldiers, but unfortunately she would have to disturb them before they could finish. She could not hold off for long.
“Help!” she shouted as loud as her exhausted lungs let her. “Help! Alfonse!”
Eden didn’t have time to check if anyone had heard. The archer squad would have the best chance at helping her fastest, but Eden bouncing around unpredictably would be a major problem. Her jumping in front of an oncoming arrow was a high risk, and an even higher possibility.
“No one is coming for you little girl. So why don’t you just give up?” the soldier said. He was getting annoyed at this meaningless struggle. The girl was supposed to be an easy mark, but instead she stabbed him and kept blocking his attacks with the worst shielding technique he had ever seen.
Eden’s thoughts raced. Her arms grew more tired with every hit the shield absorbed. What if she threw the shield at the soldier and used Breidablik to summon a Hero? No, the risk was too high. While she had summoned heroes on the battlefield before, it wasn’t guaranteed to work. She should try to hold on and wait for help.
“You. Are. Starting. To. Piss. Me. Off,” the soldier grunted between swings.
“Leave me alone then,” Eden said and jumped out of the way of another hit. She would’ve loved being left alone, because her stamina was at its limit. Over the soldier’s shoulder she saw Nephenee still fighting with the other soldier. She seemed to be doing better, gaining the upper hand.
Alfonse would never let her hear the end of this. Next time she would be stuffed in Arden’s armor.
Something whizzed right past Eden’s ear. She jumped in surprise and turned to look. Some of the archers were heading her way. Claude drew his bow as his horse galloped closer.
“You should pay attention girl!”
Eden turned to look at the Emblian soldier again, and he struck the pommel of his sword on her temple.
Stars filled Eden’s vision as pain bloomed on her head. She dropped the shield and staggered back. She stumbled on her feet and fell to the ground with a loud thud, hitting the back of her head. Gasping for breath she instinctively rolled to her side, while gathering strength to get back up. Her vision still blurry; she blinked as hard as she could trying to make her eyes work again. She heard steady thumps of footsteps against the ground. Or maybe it was her head pounding. Her hand searched for the dagger she dropped in the grass. Her fingers curled around the handle as a sword descended towards her. She raised her dagger in a desperate attempt to block the attack.
The dagger helped nothing, and the sword sliced her hand. Eden cried out in pain and tried to crawl out of the next hit’s way. Blood stained the grass.
Another arrow flew through the air, this time hitting its mark and sinking into the Emblian soldier’s wounded shoulder. He cursed and stepped back, giving Eden enough time to gather her bearings and get back on her unsteady feet. She cradled her wounded hand to her chest too scared to look down to see the extent of damage.
Before the Emblian fighter had a chance to attack Eden again, a large figure stepped between them. A dark fur cape blocked Eden’s vision. A glowing purple sword stopped the next strike from the enemy.
“You will never lay a finger on her again,” Líf growled and drove his sword into the soldier’s chest.
Sökkvabekkr was a cursed sword. As it pierced the Emblian soldier’s chest, a wave of purple energy erupted from it. Passing through Líf without causing any harm, it crashed over Eden filling every inch of her body with searing pain. She screamed. Bright white light filled her vision, and she crumbled to the ground.
Heroes summoned to Askr could not die. Even if they suffered a fatal wound, they would pass out until someone healed them, hanging on with what Eden assumed to be some god’s divine magic. Eden had theorized that since she was also summoned to Askr, this rule applied to her as well. So far she had been lucky enough to not have to test her theory, but the thought brought her comfort in this crazy world.
A warm sensation washed over the Summoner’s body. Heaviness disappeared from her limbs. The throbbing pain in her head faded away. The bleeding wound in her palm sealed itself.
“Eden? Can you hear me?” Alfonse’s voice called
Eden’s eyelids fluttered. She opened her eyes slowly, squinting at the brightness. Alfonse hovered over her with one of the Order’s healers standing behind him.
“Oh, thank Askr.” Alfonse sighed. “How are you feeling?”
“I’m okay. Is Nephenee okay? Everyone else?
“Everyone is okay. Can you stand up?”
Eden nodded. Alfonse offered his hand and pulled Eden on her feet. She leaned on his shoulder to steady herself.
Nephenee rushed to her.
“I’m sorry. I was supposed to protect you, but I couldn’t do it. You got hurt because of me.”
“Don’t blame yourself. You did good. I should’ve called for help right away. I’m sorry about that.”
Eden looked around. On the battlefield Byleths and their students were cleaning up the final stragglers of the Emblian troops. Healers walked around aiding the wounded, and a small group had gathered around Eden.
One person was missing.
“Where is Líf?”
“He left,” Alfonse said with thinly veiled contempt in his voice. “He saw you fall, and he took off.”
“I’ll talk to him later then.”
Alfonse left Eden to rest while he ordered the troops around. A small group would stay behind to guard the gate for a while to make sure no enemies lurked around. The rest would head back.
When they prepared for the return to the castle, Dimitri insisted Eden take his horse. She tried to decline since she was fully back to normal thanks to the healing magic, but it was hard to say no to a prince.
So, she rode Dimitri’s peculiar long haired horse while the prince walked next to her, one hand holding the reins. Eden didn’t have the heart to tell him that she was an experienced rider when the prince was so eager to help her. Instead she asked Dimitri how the battle had gone for him, and he replied with a few words, but after a couple more questions he launched into an in depth analysis of the battle and his own performance.
“You have a good understanding of battle,” Eden said.
“I have trained ever since I was a child. But I also have an excellent teacher,” Dimitri replied and smiled. His analysis changed into praise of Byleth, and soon the other Blue Lion students joined in, all telling about their favorite lessons from their professor.
When they returned to the castle, Alfonse stopped the Summoner before she could wander off. He placed his hand on her shoulder, firm but gentle.
“You should rest,” Alfonse said. “I’ll report to Anna.”
“I feel fine. I have things to do anyway.”
Alfonse sighed. He should’ve known by now that there was no talking sense to Eden. “Just be careful with him. I know he’s supposed to be on our side, but I don’t trust him.”
Eden smiled and headed off. Alfonse looked after her. She was hopeless, trying to see good in people even when they might’ve been beyond saving. But Alfonse also admired that in Eden. She tried. He had done nothing to help his other self. Alfonse didn’t know how to feel about Líf. He didn’t want to think what would’ve happened if he had been in his place. It scared him.
Eden wandered around the castle grounds looking for Líf, but she quickly realized it would be a waste of time. If Líf wanted to be alone, he wouldn’t be hiding at the stables or the armory, probably not even his own room.
“He could be anywhere,” Eden muttered to herself. No one had seen Líf after he disappeared from the battlefield. He never wanted to participate in the Order’s activities, so this would’ve been a good opportunity to leave. Despite his size, Líf could move faster than the average person. He could go far before anyone could get on his trail, and he could be gone for good. He’d still be bound to Eden through the summoning contract, but he would be alone at least.
Despite the possibility that Líf was on his way to new lands, Eden’s legs carried her towards a certain location. She entered the forest keeping her senses open.
Soon enough she reached the clearing where she had found Líf the previous day. A sulking figure sat on one of the fresh tree stumps, leaning against his sword.
“There you are,” Eden said.
Líf looked up. The mask covered most of his face, but his eyes revealed a storm of emotion. He jumped on his feet, and before Eden had time to say or do anything else, Líf crossed the distance between them and pulled Eden in an almost-bone-crushing hug.
“You’re not dead.”
“No, I’m not.”
“I thought… When I heard you call for help, when you called my…old name, it brought back memories of…him. And when I thought that I had again failed to protect… That I killed another one….I… I didn’t want to see it again.”
A whirlpool of emotions swirled inside Eden. Her face pressed against Líf’s chest that had no beating heart inside, but heartache filled his wavering voice. She caught a glimpse of the man he was before Hel took everything from him.
Eden slowly raised her arms and wrapped them around Líf.
“I’m okay. Everything is okay.”
Eden’s words shook Líf awake from his emotional state. He quickly released his hold and stepped away, turning his back to Eden.
“This is why I didn’t want to get involved,” he said. “I only hurt people.”
“No you don’t.” Eden tried to step around Líf to see his face. “I saw you. You did your best to make sure no one got hurt. You saved me.”
Líf didn’t budge. He was a terrible person, and Eden shouldn’t get involved with him anymore. He would ask Alfonse to send him to a distant outpost to guard over. He was sure Alfonse would be happy to get rid of the ghost sharing his image.
Eden sighed. This grown man, pouting like a kid. She had sympathy for him, but she believed that wallowing in self pity never did anything good for anyone, and even less for someone who had gone through terrible things like Líf had. She didn’t want him to be alone.
“I have an idea. Follow me,” she said and started heading back to the castle.
Líf looked over his shoulder but didn’t move.
When Eden didn’t hear footsteps she turned around. “I said, follow me.”
She walked back to Líf and grabbed his hand. The metal glove felt cool against her skin despite it being a warm day.
Líf’s hand twitched when Eden grabbed it. Pulling free from her touch was Líf’s first instinct. She shouldn’t touch him. But when was the last time anyone had touched him so casually? How long ago did Kiran die? He couldn’t remember anymore. Maybe he could humor Eden for a little while. Yes, he would go along for her sake.
“Okay, here we are.” Eden stopped in front of a wooden door and let go of Líf’s hand. For a split second Líf wanted to reach for the touch before he caught himself.
“Why are we at the armory?” Líf asked, finally realizing where they were.
“We’re here to see if there would be a secondary weapon for you to use.” Eden smiled like she had come up with the greatest idea in the world. She opened the door and stepped in. The scents of leather, wood and metal with a hint of flowers mixed together in the warm air of the room.
“If you feel uncomfortable in battle because of Sökkvabekkr, we can find you something else to use. We have tons of different swords. You can look around and pick what would fit you the best.”
The weapon borrowing system was genius even if Eden said so herself. Each summoned Hero had their own weapon, but those who wanted some change in their lives, dropped off their weapons in the armory and picked up a new one to test out. The Order had a deal with the Anna merchants’ guild, and if someone expressed an interest in one of the new weapons they had tried, they could order it from the respective world’s Anna with the help of the Askr Branch of the Ylisse Division of Anna & Co. Thanks to the large numbers of Heroes, they had a wide variety of weapons to choose from nowadays. People didn’t need to use simple steel swords and spears anymore.
Líf blinked slowly. A new sword for him? He glanced at the blade hanging on his side. He deserved his cursed sword. It was a reminder of his nature and his cursed existence. He had done nothing to deserve better.
“Do you have ideas of what you’d like?” The Summoner continued talking while walking around the armory. “The two-handed swords are around here. Armoslayer is a classic. There’s also this sword Scáthach brought with him. But I think you might also like Wo Dao or—”
“Why are you doing this?” Líf interrupted her.
“Huh?” Eden turned around. “What do you mean?”
“Why are you trying so hard to make me included? Why can’t you leave me alone? I don’t need your help or your pity.”
The words came out harsher than Líf had intended, but if it helped the Summoner to understand she would be better off without associating with him, he could be harsher.
“I don’t want you to be alone. You don’t need to punish yourself endlessly. You deserve good things.”
Eden’s soft voice and gentle face annoyed Líf. What did she know about him? Why did she care?
“I deserve nothing! Everyone I loved is dead, and I couldn’t save them! I failed them twice! Why should I live happily now, when they’re all dead and never coming back?”
Líf’s raised voice didn’t make Eden flinch or back away. She stood her ground when Líf took a step forward, towering over her.
She should’ve withdrawn.
She should’ve been scared of him, so he could leave and be alone.
Why did she look up to meet his eyes?
“You suffering alone won’t bring them back either. I can’t imagine the pain you’re feeling, but you don’t need to carry it alone. You have allies.”
Líf scoffed. “Everyone here hates me. I know they do.”
“I don’t hate you.”
“Why?”
“Because I know that under all that pain is a good man. You have done bad things, but you did them because you had to. And you did them to save those whom you love. No one is forcing you anymore. You can start again.”
Líf said nothing. Eden took a deep breath to stop her voice from shaking.
“If you really want me to leave you alone, I will. I will never talk to you again if that’s what you want. Go wherever you want to go. I can send you back if that’s what you want. But I want to help you. I want to support you. You don’t have to be alone. I’ll be your friend if you let me.”
Silence fell to the armory. Líf and Eden stared each other in the eye. Eden’s heart beat fast and her eyes stinged from tears trying to well up in them. Líf stood still like a statue, emotionless and unreadable.
Líf broke eye contact first. He turned his head away and took a step back. One hand rested on the hilt of his sword.
Without saying a word he walked past the Summoner and out of the room.
All the strength in Eden’s body disappeared at once. The sword she had been holding clattered on the floor and she slumped on a stool next to one of the sword stands, knocking down a blue parasol that had been leaning against it. She rubbed her face with her hands. Tears burned in her eyes.
She messed up. She was the Summoner; she was supposed to help all the Heroes. She had to make them feel welcome. She had to support them. It was her responsibility, her job, and she wanted to do it. She wanted to help them all, but especially Líf. She wanted to help him, make him feel happy and accepted and…loved. He deserved it. But she drove him away. She failed.
Now Líf hated her.
Líf walked away from the armory as fast as he could. His emotions and thoughts tangled up to a big ball of ‘what the Hel am I going to do?’. That stupid summoner. She should’ve sent him away instead of offering to be there for him. When she looked at him with her tearful, blue eyes, he wanted to say yes. He wanted to think she could help him. He wanted to hang on to those words like they were a lifeline thrown to a drowning person. But if he did, he might pull Eden down with him. He didn’t want her to drown too.
It’d be better to stay away from her. Just one more person to avoid. How hard could it be?