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Fjord didn’t think very much about having to go to the Wildout Campgrounds for an emergency meeting, he was just glad that they weren’t all trying to squeeze into Veth’s condo again. He wasn’t even surprised that she didn’t specify what the emergency meeting was for. But that didn’t mean he wasn’t curious … and a little worried. He didn’t think Veth had anything like the Cerberus Assembly or Ukotoa to fight.
He and Jester made their way through the wide fields surrounding the main cabin, shoes crunching on dead grass that had been presumably painted to act as the field for some sort of sport. At least the camp seemed like it was between sessions. There were no kids around except for Luc, who was playing a complicated version of fetch with Nugget. Or maybe that was the issue - had something happened to the camp’s children? Did she need them to act as counselors again? Were the grounds themselves haunted?
If there were any clues, Fjord didn’t notice them. The door to the main cabin opened with an obnoxiously loud creak, and everyone inside - the rest of the Nein, including Kingsley - turned to stare at them.
“Hiii, sorry we’re late! We super lost track of time.” Jester said, waving, then bouncing over to an empty seat. Fjord, noting that the remaining chairs seemed to be closer to Luc’s size than his, chose to squat next to one instead of actually sitting on it.
Veth blew a whistle that was at the end of a button-filled lanyard. It was incredibly shrill and loud and, in Fjord’s mind, completely unnecessary in the small space.
“All right, since the last of us finally showed up, we can begin,” she said. Then she fell silent. Everyone stared at Veth, expectantly. Veth stared back. Outside, Nugget barked at some seagulls.
“Sorry, did I miss you saying what we’re doing?” asked Yasha. She had tried to take one of the tiny seats that had been set up, but it had collapsed under her weight. Still, she sat on the broken pile of wood.
“No. I’m just trying to figure out how to say this,” Veth admitted.
“Do you need more time?” asked Caleb, concern and care evident in his voice. “We would all help you with whatever you need, you know that?”
“Oh! We can all turn around and you can tell it to our backs if it’s super embarrassing,” said Jester.
“It’s not … I don’t … I’m going to call this off,” Veth mumbled.“I’m sorry for getting you all out here for nothing.”
“Veth,” said Yeza softly, placing his hand on her shoulder.
Veth mustered some sort of bravery and stood up a little straighter. “I could use your help. We’d have to go to Felderwin the day after tomorrow.”
“Is this the Cerberus Assembly?” asked Caleb.
“Is it a cult?” asked Yasha.
“Is it the syphilis bandits?” asked Jester.
“Why wait until the day after tomorrow, we can go now if we really need to,” pointed out Beau.
“No, it’s the Day of Heart and Hearth,” admitted Veth.
“Wait, no, that was yesterday,” said Beau, clearly confused.
“In Felderwin we celebrate until New Dawn,” explained Yeza.
Yeza looked towards Veth and when it became clear she wasn’t going to explain any more, he picked it up for her. “Luc said something recently about not remembering Felderwin beyond, well, the Kryn invasion, so we thought it would be a good idea to take him back and visit during the holiday season.”
“Right, and you all helped out with Caleb’s holiday thing and Beau’s holiday thing, so I thought it was time for you to help out with my holiday thing. We can do Caduceus next, I guess,” said Veth.
“I’m actually perfectly fine celebrating the day of Heart and Hearth with my family,” said Caduceus, “You’re all invited, if you want to make it out there.”
Fjord, Jester, and Kingsley had been there for that first year, and he’d remembered some strain between the newly reconnected family, but if Kingsley wasn’t going to say anything, neither would he. Maybe that was normal for families.
“Maybe it would make sense to visit during a less, ah, loaded time?” says Caleb
“Yeah, if it’s anything like my Heart and Hearth growing up, it’s a bunch of seething resentments and passive aggressive gift giving.” said Beau.
“Nope, it’s perfect. Any other time, all of the attention would be on me - well, us,” she said, indicating herself, Yeza, and presumably Luc outside, “and this way we can fade into the background with the least amount of attention paid to us.”
Fjord felt Jester about to ask why she didn’t want to spend any time with her family, and put his hand to stop her. “You’d be visiting your family there? You’ve got brothers right?”
“Three brothers: Loro, Marish, and Hoberrt,” says Veth, “Loro’s wife is named Lia, and Hoberrt is married to Latt.”
“Doesn’t sound like you’re very close to them. Anything we should know about?” asked Caduceus.
“No, they’re fine. They’re just … small town folk.”
Fjord didn’t really understand what she meant by that, but he was still suspicious of it.
Then Yeza put his arm around Veth and said “I never cared for the way they treated my Veth.”
Everyone was silent for a minute, taking that in. Then Yasha said “Okay. Who do we need to kill?”
Caleb shrugged philosophically and pulled out a small pad to take notes.
“Nobody, we don’t have to kill anybody! I’m going to go back, I’m taking as many of you with you as I can so they can forget that I’m there, I’m going to show Luc Felderwin so he knows what it looks like, and that’s it!”
“… I don’t suppose you can visit Felderwin without them knowing?” Fjord asked.
“No, it’s too small, everybody knows everything. I tried to talk Yeza into going with disguises, but he didn’t think it would work.”
“You know those fake mustaches never stay on your face.” Yeza’s tone suggested that this was a well worn argument.
“If you want, I could use some super fancy magic on all of you?” asked Jester. Fjord could tell that she was making up new personas for the family already.
“No, Yeza’s right. They’d still know. They’re canny with outsiders,” said Veth.
“… all right. The day after tomorrow it is. Anything we should know before we leave?” said Fjord.
“No, I think we covered it. We can walk to my Great-Aunt Kyla’s house which is a couple of hours from the Felderwin town center, we should be fine.”
“… Likes, dislikes, how to behave?” Fjord suggested.
“You know how you had a full battle plan and chalkboard strategies for mine - don’t you want to do the same for yours?” said Beau.
“… Nope! We’re winging it. Just be yourselves. I’m sure it will all go perfectly.” Veth put on a grand smile.
Fjord made a mental note to bring some health potions along, just in case.
The trip from Felderwin’s town center did indeed take a little over an hour. They’d polymorphed into giant eagles to help shorten the trip, but Veth, perched and giving directions from on top a transformed Caleb, would demand that they land whenever they passed a new orange grove, so she could climb the trees to take a few on the road. Fjord, who had grown up with oranges as an impossible extravagance and had learned to think of them as a carefully guarded resource on a ship, instinctively grew fearful that some farmers or guards were going to immediately materialize to chase them away. Never mind that they could take on anyone who did show up. The others didn’t seem to share his fear - not even Caduceus, who simply used his height to stretch up and grab a few, no climbing needed.
He had to admit that the oranges were good - somehow more citrus than he was used to, sweet and sour at the same time. Fjord ate his carefully, making sure not to waste any of the juice.
The polymorph wore off before the travel was finished, but Veth was adamant (to Luc’s disappointment and Yeza’s relief) that they would be better received on foot. It wasn’t long before they came to a small copse of houses, a dozen clustered together among the fields. Great-Aunt Kyla’s house, when they reached it, was modest in size. A covered area extended off one side of the house. Fjord had seen them in Nicodranas to help protect carts from the hot sun, but here a collection of carts were parked alongside the dirt path and the covered area seemed to be made into a makeshift dance floor.
In all fairness, it seemed like there were more of Veth’s family in the house, more in the front yard, and - from the sounds of it - the most raucous game of dominoes that Fjord had ever considered was happening in the back of the house.
“This is your family?” Fjord asked.
Veth looked around. “About half of it. Hmm, wonder who angered who now.”
Fjord’s concept of family was mostly based on his fellow sailors - who are not known for their extensive ties to large numbers of people on land - and the rest of the Nein. His concept of a large family was the Clays, with seven of them all in one home. This was dozens. And if the next few moments were suggestive of anything, he would be expected to greet each of them individually. A few people came out of the house, Veth said his name, they all said theirs, and they dragged him from group to group. Names and relations were shouted in quick succession as there were hugs, quick kisses, handshakes, and in the case of the very intense domino players, a brief nod and moment of silence before they lapsed back into their argument in Halfling.
“They’ve been playing against each other for forty years; you’d think they’d at least agree on the rules by now,” said Yeza, a little grumpily.
Fjord, for his part, did his best to reciprocate whatever greeting was given to him, kneeling down to allow for the halflings to have better access. Yasha and Caduceus were of no such help, and the Felderwin halflings ended up craning their heads up and miming kisses from three feet away. Beau quickly moved into position, finding her place next to an elderly man watching the lechón on a magically turning spit. How she came to have a bottle of beer in her hand, Fjord may never find out.
Fjord went to join her, but from somewhere within the whirling conversations, he heard his name.
“Fjord would be great at it - he’s so big and strong and imposing.”
It was Veth; talking to her … aunt? Cousin? Fjord couldn’t remember which. A middle aged but very elegant looking halfling, at any rate. He was immediately suspicious, but quickly remembered why they were in town in the first place. It wouldn’t do to get into an argument in front of her family.
“I’ll do my best to be of help in any way I can,” he said with his most grandma-pleasing smile.
The look that Veth gave him made him even more suspicious. But he allowed himself to be led over to one of the carts parked in the front of the house. Covered by a blanket were a half dozen bottles of thick, cream-colored liquid, stored in large glass bottles with the label ‘Brenatto’s sweetened carbonated water’ mostly ripped off.
“Here’s the deal - keep the kids away from the coquito and if anyone comes outside for a refill, make sure they take from these bottles, not from any other ones.”
“How can I tell if someone is old enough to have coquito?”
“It’s just Cyril, little Kyla, and Orla you have to worry about. If it’s Da’nee or Beyna, you can let them have some, but make sure they feel like they’re getting away with something.”
Fjord stared blankly at her.
The woman shrugged. “If they’re tall enough, it’s probably fine.”
She craned her neck up at Fjord.
“I mean, taller than yeah high.” She indicated a height that was at the Fjord’s mid-thigh instead of his hip. “The second part is more important - nobody else’s coquito - they have mine.”
And then she walked away, leaving Fjord to watch the party at a distance. It was strange - looking from here, this would have been the sort of family that he would have wanted as a kid. There was shouting, sure - but people smiling and laughing, some kids running around the cartport. Even the domino arguments looked … comfortable. Lived-in. It was a sense of permanency that Fjord would have loved, once upon a time, when everything seemed like it could be upended in a second.
He didn’t doubt that Veth had her reasons, but he somehow expected that Felderwin be staid, a little stuffy. More like the Lionett estate. Veth’s problems would be that she was too brash. But from the sounds of the party spilling out, it was difficult to imagine that to be the case.
There was another halfling with a half dozen bottles of coquito next to him. This one was slightly younger than the first. Fjord had started to categorize the attendees based on how much they resembled Veth, and this one was further out on the spectrum - possibly an in-law?
“I’m sorry, but I’m supposed to be guarding this coquito - unless that’s the stuff that’s supposed to be given to children?” Fjord explained.
The halfling snorted.
“That Vyn’ee’s batch?”
Fjord stared blankly.
“Veth’s aunt?”
Fjord thought about pretending he knew the answer.
“Light skin, badly bleached hair in curls, wearing a green dress?”
“Oh yes, that was the one.”
“I’m Veth’s Sister-in-law, Lia. And trust me, Veth wants you to be handing my stuff out.,” Lia said, and Fjord still looked unconvinced. “You see, Vyn is from Felderwin Tillage, so she gets her rum from Revvetha’s distillery. Not our Veth, Revvetha Ardi. Meanwhile, me, and Veth, and half the people here are from Felderwin proper, so we go to Dawn Coo’s - much better.”
“I was told…”
“Look, just take the coquito, and if anyone needs a refill, use mine first. She won’t know if you don’t take hers, but I will.” Lia looked like she was willing to make good on that threat, though Fjord really didn’t understand how. The bottles that Lia handed over looked exactly like the ones that Vyn’ee had put under his protection - down to the ripped up labels from Brenatto’s apothecary.
Suddenly, Fjord understood why Veth had given him this job. There was no winning. And it was a way to make him miss the party, have him watch it from the outside. In truth, when someone came out to the cart for a refill, he ended up giving them a bottle at random. Then spent the hours trying to block out the sounds coming from the house and stared off into the groves, trying to enjoy the sunset.
“You could go inside if you want.” Yasha appeared next to him. He must be more out of it than he realized if Yasha was able to sneak up on him, some sort of wiry mutt following behind her.
“I was supposed to…”
“I know. It’s fine. I need a break. Plus, there’s a dog out here, and I’ve been told he can’t come inside.” Yasha broke off some jerky and fed it to the dog - which explained how she had gotten her companion.
“The noise that bad?”
“It’s a lot of reminders of how things were with the Dolorav tribe,” Yasha said, then quickly added, “Don’t worry, I’m not planning on killing anyone here.”
“… how are they like your tribe?”
Yasha went quiet, and Fjord let the silence stretch, the sounds of the party filling the background.
“You’re with people, and you’ve got to depend on them, and you can’t just go out on your own. So conflict’s bad. Which makes being like everyone else good - and that makes standing out bad. It’s a lot of pressure.”
“Like being on a ship, I suppose.” Fjord mused.
“Probably, but with less choice in when you get on. And you’re good at being someone else. Not all of us are.”
Fjord thought about filing his tusks down, and all of the other ways he had worked so hard to fit in. How he’d gotten so good at imitating accents at a young age because it was easier to be a mirror to everyone else than to risk being himself. The implicit idea that being like everyone else was the best chance he had at survival. And then he thought about how, no matter what they tried, Veth and Yasha’s personalities seemed to shine through.
“Where is Veth at now?”
“I think she wandered back into the orchard groves a while ago. She’s right, the party’s so big, it’s easy to have everyone think you’re in the other room,” said Yasha.
Only Veth hadn’t been back to Felderwin - as herself - in a decade. The lack of care seemed odd, even to him. Had they known she was alive?
“Anyone else sneak out, too?” Fjord asked.
“I think Beau figured out which kid had the most overprotective parent and snuck out with them to teach them how to pick locks. I wonder if that’s why she packed fireworks.”
“Well, take care.” Fjord went to pet the wiry dog, but it backed away from his hand, so he rescinded the offer and wandered in the direction of the party.
The house was open enough that there wasn’t a wall of sound when he entered, but it was markedly warmer that outdoors, and smelled of fried foods and alcohol. The roof was uncomfortably close to his head, but at least it made it easy to find Jester and Caleb in the crowd. He grabbed a drink from the makeshift bar and made his way over to them.
Jester, for her part, was talking animatedly to Veth’s … cousin? And brother? Maybe? A man and a woman, at any rate. Caleb, who was standing behind Jester and watching nearby, would remember. Maybe Fjord could get the information out of him without it being obvious.
The male halfling - who was definitely related to Veth, he looked like her - had a greasy smile on his face as Fjord approached. “You must be one of Veth’s other … friends. And what is it you do?”
“I own a shipping company - A Stone’s Throw. It runs out of Nicodranas,” Fjord said, trying to sound as respectable as he could.
For his part, the male halfling looked a little appreciative. His female companion still looked a little dubious.
“Don’t you worry about leaving your little miss on the shores while you’re gone?” She said, and Fjord took a moment to realize that she had meant Jester.
“Oh no, I’m with him on most of the trips! Sometimes I’ll want to paint and catch up with Mamma, but most of the time it’s a lot more fun on the seas,” Jester said.
At this, Probably-Veth’s-Cousin whispered something to Probably-Veth’s-Brother, then stifled some giggling. Caleb frowned, and Fjord tried his best to signal ‘who are these people and what’s going on’ to him.
“And does she help with the shipping company with the help of this traveler?” said Probably-Veth’s Brother.
“Having a powerful cleric like Jester is a great help on the seas - she is a wonderful healer and uses her powers to help mend the ship and bring fresh food and water, Talyi and Hoberrt.” Caleb made sure to enunciate the last part clearly - whether this was to help out Fjord or to attempt to hide his irritation, Fjord couldn’t say.
“I’m sure having all of those waffle and pastry holidays is also a wonderful help,” said Hoberrt.
Jester frowned, realizing that she was being patronized. “You just told me that you celebrate three wise guys who brought some useless gifts a couple hundred years ago by putting hay in your shoes.”
“Oh no, the hay is for the donkeys,” said Talyi.
“Aren’t you worried the donkeys will eat the shoes?” asked Jester.
Hoberrt smirked and laughed. “They’re not real donkeys, of course. It’s something that we tell children.”
“Well, the Traveler is very real, and also real cool. If you want, I’m sure he would come, he really enjoys a good party.” Jester said a little loudly.
“Ah, maybe we shouldn’t summon him at this time?” Caleb said, looking a little worried.
Fjord remembered, suddenly, that they were in the midst of the Dwendalian Empire - a place with strict laws about worshiping unapproved gods, and that they were surrounded by the sort of folks that would be scandalized by that sort of thing.
Talyi whispered something else to Hoberrt. This time, Fjord thought he could hear Veth’s name in the middle of it, and Caleb snapped.
“Hallo. I understand that you are both teachers?” Caleb said, oddly calm.
“Yes, at the local primary school,” said Talyi.
“I am a teacher at the famed Soltryce Academy and a very accomplished wizard. Veth is one of my pupils, the best I have ever had the hope of teaching.”
“Veth? What does she use it for, button collecting?” Hoberrt said, and Talyi laughed.
“Among other things. She would be willing to show you, should you wish.” Caleb remained unamused. “The magic also means we can also all understand you. We are all being polite.”
Hoberrt went a little paler, but Talyi just screwed her mouth, as if she thought them being able to listen in was far more rude than she could manage to be. Fjord wondered why she thought they’d need the aid of magic - in truth, Fjord had missed the specifics of everything they’ve said, but got the jist of it just fine.
“We also understand how supportive you’ve been to Veth, these last few years. And before.”
“She could have come back here at any time, and she didn’t,” snapped Hoberrt.
“Or how much support you leant to Yeza, when he was raising your nephew alone,” Caleb continued, raising his voice to be heard over Hoberrt.
Talyi and Hoberrt’s eyes went to where Yeza was apparently idling in the corner, talking to a very old woman. Even above the din in the room, Caleb would have been audible - and Fjord thought he saw Yeza’s ears go red.
“He didn’t need our help - always thought he was smarter than the rest of us,” said Hoberrt. Which Fjord thought was a strange thing for a teacher to say.
The look that Caleb gave him could have frozen Rumblecusp. For his part, Hoberrt chose to look away.
Caleb’s naked admiration and love was uncomfortable, but it did the trick. It would have only worked from Caleb, Fjord thought. Caleb was from a different part of the Empire, sure, but he was still Dwendalian - and had the sort of prestige that the Smyt’hhs seemed to understand. Beau could have gotten away with it, perhaps - if Beau was the sort who would ever attempt such a thing.
But even with that, Hoberrt and Talyi’s embarrassment only lasted a moment, before Talyi cleared her throat and said, “It’s a family matter, and none of your business.”
They were all silent for a moment.
“I am sorry, I find myself in need of fresh air,” Caleb muttered.
“Oh, we should be going too, for reasons?” Jester said, looking for Fjord for backup.
“Oh yes, we should really check up on, ah, Caduceus. He gets so lonesome on his own.” The excuse didn’t hold much water, but nobody was going to object to seeing the end of them, either.
They pushed their way through the crowd and went out the back door.
“Thanks - I slipped a couple of oops stones into his back pocket, and I really didn’t want to be inside when they went off,” Jester said, once they were far enough from the door.
And sure enough, only half a minute after they made it outdoors, a cursing wave of people spilled out onto the lawn.
The sun had set over the western hills. The air, though still well above freezing, was starting to chill. but there was a large bonfire lit in the back for warmth. Singing and drums spilled out from the cartport, and it looked like the game of dominoes still continued on by lamplight.
Luc was talking to one of the domino players, the one that Veth had said was her father - though, come to think of it, he hadn’t reacted much to her presence.
“You have a favorite uncle already? Which one is it?” Tra’vis was saying to Luc. “Is it Loro here?”
And, as if rehearsed, Luc walked over to Caduceus and took his finger.
“He makes the best fart jokes,” Luc said solemnly - and then Fjord knew that Cad and Luc had planned it.
“It’s great to meet you,” Caduceus reached out a hand to Veth’s father. From their current angle, Fjord couldn’t see Veth’s father’s face, and Caduceus’ expression didn’t betray anything.
There was a suspicious laughter coming from the eaves, and Fjord followed Jester’s gaze to be able to see Veth on the rooftop, watching the proceedings.
Suddenly, it seemed unfair to Fjord that they weren’t able to do more. They’d all come to help out, but no amount of tricks or shaming speeches could make her family better people. The Nein were here for her, she should be allowed to do more than disappear. He looked at Jester, wondering how he could bring this up to her - if they could come up with some sort of solution together.
Jester, for her part, seemed to be one step ahead of him. “Oh Fjord, I would love to dance right now, if only I had a partner,” she said, motioning for him to refuse.
“Oh Jester, I am sorry to let you down. I am too sickly and weak to keep up with you. If only I had another friend who would take my place,” Fjord said, loudly and without inflection.
There was a small thump as Veth jumped to the ground and took Jester’s hand. “All right, two songs. Las Parrandas should be starting soon, anyway.”
“What would that be?” asked Fjord as they headed towards the cartport.
“It’s just caroling, you can figure it out,” said Veth.
Veth’s timing was about correct, but her descriptions continued to be a little lacking. Fjord’s first clue should have been when he looked around for Yeza and found him in the now-empty house with a lit lamp and a book.
“I think I’ll skip it this year, get some reading done,” Yeza said.
“In here?” The smell had mostly dissipated… but it was still noticeable, and enough to keep everyone else out.
Yeza smiled. “Part of being an apothecary is getting used to strong smells. Being Luc’s father helps, too. Thank Jester for that, by the way. It’s hard to find some space any other way.”
Still, Fjord failed to anticipate the sheer amount of noise that came with the caroling - a raucous, drunken crowd utterly failing at keeping a tune, much less a harmony. Veth, for her part, joined in as much as everyone else, and nobody seemed to judge her lack of skill.
“Good job illusioning up a whole horn section,” said Beau, pointing in the direction of three trumpets and a few guitars.
“I didn’t … I think they just appeared?” Fjord said. Maybe it was Jester’s work, but none of the members of the band were unicorns.
“The band is just my cousins, they’re coming with. Makes it easier to wake everyone up.” said Veth.
“Oh wait, is that the goal?” said Jester, and then she used Thaumaturgy to open all of the windows. There was a resounding crack and a few shouts, and that seemed to be the last step that was needed to make the then-sleeping family rush outside.
“Come in, come in!” they yelled, thankfully not worried about the spells being cast on their property or the precedent being set.
Then, the mob swarmed the house, with more drinking and dancing, until it was determined that it was time to move on once more. This lasted through the night, only stopping near dawn. Caleb summoned the tower on the lawn of the last house and led the Nein inside. When they roused much later that morning - their shoes were found without a speck of hay in them. Veth quickly rounded up the party, a well-rested Yeza by her side.
“Come on, come on, it’s time to go,” she said.
“You don’t want to say goodbye to anyone?” asked Caleb.
“No, I’m good.”
Caleb looked, then shrugged. “All right. I can take Beau, Yasha, and Caduceus if you take the Nicodranas portion?” he said to Jester.
“Why thanks, but I can have my own ride home,” said Caduceus, and he quickly cast Word of Recall to prove it.
Jester quickly followed suit, and the Brenattos, Fjord, and Jester all found themselves in Jester’s old bedroom. Luc immediately took off to say hello to Bluud.
“Thank you. You all helped.” Veth said, somewhat unexpectedly.
Veth was so rarely sincere that Fjord didn’t really know how to respond.
“So, same time next year?” Fjord was joking, but he’d be willing, if she needed to.
“Maybe in five, or ten, or never again,” said Yeza, sounding angrier than Fjord had thought him capable of being.
Veth smiled wide. “Yeah. That was the best Home and Hearth festival I’ve ever been to - let’s never do it again.”