Chapter Text
Dimitri is unnerved by the professor at first, yet enraptured all the same. It isn't until a while after they return to Garreg Mach and he hears passing conversation among a few knights guarding the halls that he pieces together why.
The Ashen Demon.
He doesn't know what forces made it so that out of everyone the three could have sought help from that night, they happened to find a man who is not only a renowned mercenary, but the previous captain of the Knights of Seiros. He heard Jeralt's moniker mentioned once or twice back in the kingdom and during his time at the monastery.
However, this is the first he's heard of his prodigy, or her reputation.
Dimitri sits silently at his desk, leaned forward and head bowed in an effort to look as if he's paying attention to the book on battle strategy that lays open on its surface - but instead, his eyes are on Byleth.
She has ceased her lecture for the day, a rather enlightening presentation on group tactics, and now reclines at her own desk with her attention fixed on some papers scattered across it. The way she sits looks uncomfortable, her shoulders in a tight line and her hands folded in her lap with an unnatural stillness.
The rest of the classroom is just as quiet as everyone reviews the day's material, save for the occasional cough, sniffle, or birdsong from outside.
He’s struggled to remove his gaze from the professor ever since the night they met, something his classmates have no doubt noticed, but that he is unable to change no matter how much he tries.
Though he will never admit it aloud and feels guilt over such thoughts, he finds the nickname given to her by those who know of her repute uncomfortably suiting. With her pallor skin, dark hair, and vacant eyes, the first part of it is true, at the very least.
As for 'demon'...
Witnessing her in combat was like watching a whirlwind in human form. Although unsurprising for the child of a former Knight of Seiros, her show of skill left a mark on his mind, as did her apparent detachment while she routed the group of bandits with swift decisiveness.
He recalls how the bandit leader they struck down remarked of her empty gaze, and her facial expression has more or less remained just as empty. Her earlier lecture, while informative, was as cold and flat as her typical demeanor.
It reminds him of Dedue, but even the restraints on his dear friend's emotions come loose from time to time.
That being said, the professor's aloof behavior gives off a vibe of uneasiness, but it may just be that she sticks out at Garreg Mach like a sore thumb. She doesn't appear to be much older than he is, maybe even younger than some of the other students, and yet were given a teaching position with only mercenary work in her history.
He assumes the appointment is at least partially due to her own instructor being the man who has now returned to the ranks of the Knights, but it still seems like a lot of responsibility to take on for someone who - at first glance - looked to be her father's shadow, rather than an individual with leadership and tactical experience of her own.
Even while her monotonous voice never shakes and the lessons she’s given thus far have been valuable, her distance and coldness show how she specializes primarily in the material that she teaches, rather than the art of teaching itself...or social interaction in general.
It must be difficult for her to deal with not only his own keen interest, but the others' as well. The air of mystery around her situation flocks most students from all three houses to her like energetic children, save the more standoffish types. He's made an effort to avoid causing any further stress she might feel as a result of the attention, but something that toes the line always slips out when he gets the opportunity to speak to her alone.
Despite his apprehension about her ineffectual nature, there is so much he wants to ask about, most of which are questions he's sure are burning on everyone's mind: her experiences with combat as a mercenary, what she knows of the Knight of Seiros' former captain and his exploits, and how she ended up as a professor in the first place.
An enthusiastic person such as Hanneman would be happy to talk for hours on end about himself and his work, but outside of lectures, Byleth seldom says more than a handful of words to anyone she speaks to. Even to Jeralt.
Dimitri at least finds comfort that her curt speech is not exclusive to conversations with him.
The Ashen Demon. He does not know whether the professor is truly the type of person who cares little for the people she defeats or the lives she takes. As one of the many curiosities in his mind, he has considered asking her directly, as the idea of it refuses to leave him be, but how one even comes upon such a dark subject in conversation is beyond him.
He sometimes catches her staring off into space while sitting or standing in secluded places around the monastery...it makes him wonder if they have their own troubled past.
"Dimitri?"
His shoulders jerk as the professor's voice pulls him from his thoughts. She’s looking back at him now, eyebrows pinched together ever so slightly in a way that could go unnoticed if his desk weren't close to the front of the classroom. He quickly breaks eye contact as his cheeks burn with shame. Still, he clears his throat and tries to keep his composure.
"Yes, professor?"
She inclines her head, although it comes off like a mimicry of concern. "Are you feeling alright?"
He nods hastily. "Yes, I'm doing just fine. Perhaps a little tired but..."
He trails off and the resulting silence twists his stomach into a knot, until someone in the classroom snickers, most certainly Sylvain.
Dimitri doesn't turn to glare at him but makes a mental note to avoid him for the rest of the day and save himself from the teasing, or maybe the rest of the week.
Byleth blinks slow and the burning in his cheeks somehow gets worse. Is she annoyed with him? Does she know he is trying to cover for himself?
Worse...does she think he is staring at her for depraved reasons?
"Make sure to get adequate rest. The mock battle is only a week from now."
The statement is a reasonable and considerate one, but the flatness of her voice offers no comfort.
"Of course, professor." Dimitri attempts a reassuring smile. "I won't let you down."
Byleth nods in return before her eyes drop back to the papers on her desk.
Some of the tension leaks out of Dimitri's shoulders and he lets out a quiet sigh of relief. He still doesn’t dare to turn his head, but he swears that he hears Felix disapprovingly mutter the words 'teacher's pet.'
At least avoiding him outside of class won't be difficult.