Chapter Text
Mizi lay down on the cold stone floor of the marketplace, her breathing shallow. She knew her time had come, and she would let the forgiving waves of death take her, soothe the pain from the beating she had taken.
In a way, her death was her own fault. She had been lazy with trimming her real hair, too busy bargaining at the market for scraps, and someone had noticed the bright pink strands peeking out from under her wig. As a result, she had been beaten and ridiculed for ruining the rebellion’s plan.
She closed her eyes slowly, taking her final breath. The people around her didn’t care, just kept on moving as they tried to avoid acknowledging the dying woman in front of them.
Sua… will I see you in the afterlife, or will I be banished to the depths of hell for my sins?
Her body jolted, and a searing pain spread through her chest before her pain was suddenly stopped with an eerie silence. Then, a voice cut through the air—a voice that she remembered much too well.
”Mizi! Wake up, sleepyhead!” Sua’s voice called, and she tapped on the other girl’s shoulder. Her voice sounded different from the last time they had talked though, more childish than she remembered.
Am I in heaven? What’s happened?
Carefully, Mizi opened her eyes, the bright light of the artificial sun causing her to wince. But the bright light didn’t matter, because right in front of her was Sua, as a child. She seemed to be about eleven or twelve right now, before all the talk about Alien Stage truly started and life was mainly play time besides the constant abuse from the aliens.
“Huuh?” Mizi mumbled, placing a hand over her eyes.
Sua giggled, pulling Mizi up. “You were so tired after class that you just fell asleep!”
What the hell is going on? Where am I? Have I traveled back in time somehow- what’s going on?
Mizi gripped the sides of her dress taking in the world around her. It looked exactly the same as she remembered it, the bright artificial sky, the colorful flowers around them. Everything was normal- except it wasn’t, because this couldn’t be real. But she knew she had to act at least a little normal, or the aliens would worry- after all, they were always watching from the tiny cameras hidden in the flora.
“Oh. Oh wow. Hey, can you tell me the day real quick? I need to make sure I’m not missing…” Mizi trailed off, looking for a lie that would make sure Sua wouldn’t suspect anything. “I need to make sure I’m not missing my visit with Shine—I miss her so much!”
“Huh? Oh yeah, it’s Monday. The time… it’s around 3 PM.” Sua said matter-of-factly, then looked towards Ivan and Till, who were playing in the background. “You know, Ivan told me, him and Till were going to escape today, and he told us to follow his path tomorrow.”
“What?” Mizi asked, her mind reeling. Ivan and Till never ended up escaping—what happened today? She was about to ask another question, but realized she had a facade to put up. “Why would they escape?”
A look of regret flashed across the other girl’s face, which she attempted to cover up with a nervous smile. “I mean, I guess they wanna see the world outside. I don’t know, it’s such a paradise here that there’s no point in the outside world!”
Mizi frowned a little, pulling Sua to sit down with her on the soft grass. “Then why does Ivan want us to go after him?”
“Well… maybe he wants us to see too. You know, you shouldn’t be worrying about these kinds of things. It’s boring, and will just leave you stressed. Okay, my Mizi?”
“Okay. Listen, I- I need to go real quick.” Mizi said, quickly getting up. “I’m gonna go check my visit time.”
“Huh? Well, okay…” Sua mumbled sadly, laying down on the grass. “I’ll be here when you come back!”
Mizi turned back and smiled before running to the Anakt Building, purposefully bumping into Ivan so she could pull him aside.
“Oh, hey Mizi! Careful there running.” He placed his hands on her shoulders to stabilize her real quick, then turned back to Till, clearly intending to continue his conversation.
“Hey, I actually need to talk to you in private.” Mizi glanced over at Till, who had this weird expression of both shock and jealousy on his face.
The two walked over to a nearby tree, sitting underneath its false shade and security. Ivan suddenly noticed their direction and mumbled for them to go somewhere else, something about kids being able to hear them at the big holographic oak.
Instead, they went to an abandoned corridor, and then Mizi sprang her question.
“Why are we escaping separately?”
Ivan’s usually composed face transformed into an expression of shock. “How do you know about my plan?”
“I- Sua told me.”
This odd expression crossed Ivan’s face, and he looked away, mumbling something. He quickly went back to his usual neutral appearance, and explained the simple logic of escaping separately- the fact that the security camera’s blind spots weren’t wide enough for four people, it was more of a concern to see four kids who looked exactly like the kids on the missing poster towers.
Well, how come it didn’t work? Maybe that was just a once in a lifetime thing though, maybe it will be different this time around.
“Okay! Well, I’ll see you wherever we’re escaping tomorrow. I wish you luck, Ivan.”
“Thank you, Mizi. I knew I can count on you to understand.” Ivan flashed a quick smile, and the two went their separate ways.
The next morning, Mizi went to the dining hall for breakfast just to see Ivan and Till there, not speaking. Usually they were debating something stupid, or talking about music class, or even just fighting. But they never just plain ignored each other.
Mizi pulled away Ivan again, which caused a chorus of oohs across the room—but she didn’t care. What she needed to know was what went wrong, so she would apply this to a future escape attempt.
“What happened, Ivan?” Mizi asked urgently.
Ivan just looked away ashamedly, and then finally spoke.
“He didn’t escape because he thought we were leaving you two behind. He didn’t even give me a chance to explain that you would be coming tomorrow.” He said sullenly, his hand on his other arm.
“Well, can’t we try to escape next year?”
“No, Mizi.” Ivan’s tone was cold, and she winced a little bit. Noticing this, he softened it. “A guard caught me coming back, saw the blind spots on the cameras. They’re fixing up the cameras and getting new ones—there’s no escaping now. We’re fucked, Mizi.”
Never in my life have I heard Ivan curse. We’re all done for, aren’t we? I’m given another chance at life, and I fuck it up, as always. Well, I can atleast try to win Alien Stage and try my best not to get so mad.
After all, that’s what got me killed in my last life.
The rest of Mizi’s time in Anakt went by without much change. She desperately tried to stop Sua from sacrificing herself, but every time, she just couldn’t bring herself to put in real effort. Mizi knew—if she died, Sua would not be able to handle her sudden death. And she would definitely not be able to handle the monster that was Luka in Round Five.
My God, My Universe.
Mizi held Sua’s hand on stage, as they sang their final line. The two looked at each other and smiled, but Mizi knew what was coming.
The warm, sticky feeling of Sua’s blood splattered across the other girl’s face, and she couldn’t help but sink to the ground for a second time, shaking her lover ever so slightly to try to feel life in her dead body.
The guard put a collar on her, and took her away, announcing that she would have a round tomorrow and to rest up. But how could she do that when she had witnessed her lover die in front of her for the second time?
Luka moved around like a ninja on stage, knowing exactly how to spin her and taunt her so that when it was finally time for Mizi to sing, no words came out except a pathetic squeak. And then her face showed up, and he got so, so close…
Mizi’s fear turned into an indescribable rage, and before she knew it, she had Luka on the ground, punching and punching, the horrific sound of something cracking like music to her ears. The guards tried to seize her, but the rebellion members were faster, taking her away in the smoke of the stage.
Those rebellion days were a blur of trying to break into the Anakt system, of fighting, saying things she could not take back. Every day, Mizi cried herself to sleep, her memories taking her back to that moment in the cold transportation system that took both Mizi and Sua to Anakt Garden, those moments where Mizi stared at Sua as though she was the most beautiful girl in the world.
Every day, she tried to put herself into the project, helping critique the blueprints, finding spare parts around the place with other rebels. But she never truly saw the point of the stupid rocket. If everyone had to die for it to launch, then what was the point at all? What was the point of trying to save the future if the present would just be gone?
When she saw Till on stage, she could not help it. She needed to save him. After all, she could not save Ivan, the only boy who had never harbored attraction to her. She could not save Sua, her God, her universe. This was her last chance.
Hyuna had tried to hold her back, but she didn’t understand. She wouldn’t ever understand what it was like to need to save someone.
Mizi was too late. They had made eye contact, and Till had reached out, and the bullet whizzed past the crowd and lodged itself in his neck. Quickly, Mizi ran towards the stage, running up the side stairs she had seen in the stolen stage building plans. Till fell to the floor, and Mizi kneeled over his dying body.
She had failed again. Everyone was dead. The only person she had was Hyuna, but she knew that was temporary as well.
Hyuna’s death had happened in almost the flash of an eye, and when Mizi saw Luka, she saw the same guilty look for his lover’s death that she had seen in the mirror on herself so many times.
Before she could stop herself, she approached Luka as he was crying, and threw a punch. Again, she used him as a punching bag for her anger, something that she could use to relieve herself from all the sorrow she had been harboring for the past few months.
Mizi couldn’t live like this. Maybe she could redirect the rocket differently, land it somewhere so that she would not get burned, but the aliens would stop the seasons of Alien Stage.
Before she knew it, seven years had passed, and she sat on the marketplace floor, begging for scraps. Now, she took great care to trim her hair every day, making sure it stayed at the perfect length to not peek out from under the wig, but at the same time keep her scalp safe from itching,
But as she looked up at a passerby, her wig slipped slightly and the man saw her pink hair. He pulled off the rest of the wig, announcing loudly that he had found the witch in her hiding place.
And again, she lay on the floor, bleeding out. And again, she took her last breath.
I messed up my second chance at life, I’m such an idiot. Well, there’s nothing I can do now. I will be gone from this world.
The cheerful voice of Sua filled Mizi’s ears again, and this time she opened her eyes quickly, taking in the atmosphere. It was the exact same as when she had opened her eyes in the last lifetime. A few of her friends were playing near the stream, and the sky was a sickeningly vibrant blue color, the flowers in full bloom.
Just to test it, she let this life go to waste, making the same exact decisions she had in the previous life.
She died on the floor, and woke up in Anakt Garden once again, Sua by her side
Holy shit, I can die and revive again forever.