Work Text:
Last semester was what you might call utter chaos at KISS. Yuri spent an entire summer agonizing in a state of pure denial because she couldn't muster the courage to tell everyone that, in fact, she was hopelessly in love with Kitty. She wasn't even brave enough to admit it to herself.
In her view, trying to maintain their friendship was the only right thing to do. Actually, the only thing she probably could do.
With all her family drama going on, mostly because of her parent's divorce, the girl felt like she was left with no choice, not even knowing what to do with her own feelings — didn't feel right to drag Katherine into her problems cuz she didn't even know how to fix her own shit. Kitty deserved someone who could put all their efforts onto her. She deserved to be loved and taken care of. So Yuri kept all that for herself, realizing that expressing her feelings would only make things worse for everyone.
Besides, there was Juliana. Her girlfriend who came back all of sudden, and yet, the only person she was jealous of was Kitty. The only person she kept prioritizing was Katherine Song Covey. She was late for Juliana art's exhibition because she chose to spend time with Kitty instead. Yuri felt like her world was tearing apart real fast, she was pretty much confused about what was the right thing to do. Juliana was the first girl she had ever fallen in love with, she was her first kiss, first love, first date, first girlfriend, first everything… But somehow, Kitty was the one making her heart race. She was the one girl keeping her thoughts really busy.
Kitty had managed to capture her heart slowly, before Yuri could even predict it or do anything to stop her. All of Yuri's desires turned out to be about that Korean-American noisy girl who was always trying to cheer up everyone.
And gosh, Yuri really already messed up everything saying that the kiss was a mistake and she had no idea why she even kissed her. She could see in Kitty's eyes how much it had destroyed her inside, her gaze
was so cold towards her, full of disappointment and betrayal. Yuri knew that at that moment she felt unwanted —as if all her feelings had been minimized.
That was a straight up lie. Yuri did not think their kiss was a mistake. Not even for a second. Everybody could tell that Han Yuri was panicking. She was acting in the most insufferable way.
Trying to not hurt Juliana, she ended up hurting Juliana and Kitty. And at the end, she was miserably left alone. Maybe that was her fate all along. Maybe she deserves it. That could've been her karma afterwards. With enough time to spend the whole summer thinking about how stupid she'd been not to tell Kitty the truth, not to tell her how fast her heart beat every time she was near, how Yuri felt her legs turn to jelly from how weak she became when she was around her. How pathetic she became.
Pathetic because she was in love. Truly head over heels and yet, she let Minho have her girl because she was a coward and felt she didn't deserve Kitty.
When Kitty returned from vacation, it was obvious she was dating Minho. They had started dating during Minho's father's tour. They made it public through Instagram. Which Minho thought would be the best, That way, the tabloids wouldn't break the news to the world before the two of them, and they wouldn't be caught off guard.
Spending all those days together only brought them closer, and without Stella or any drama to get in the way of these two, it didn't make sense for Katherine to keep that love confession to herself. Eventually, the words were spoken, and of course Moon Minho accepted all the love she had to offer him.
The two had many dates after that. They kissed many, many times, and even more than that. After the rollercoaster of the past semester with Yuri, Kitty felt she truly deserved this. That quiet and comforting love. That reciprocal feeling. There were no complications with Minho, no obstacles. There were no difficulties in their relationship. It seemed to have come straight out of a fairy tale. Perfect.
Too perfect, actually.
So perfect, it actually came out to be boring after a few weeks. But Kitty didn't know how to bring that up to Minho without hurting him or making him feel bad.
He was indeed a good boyfriend, it wasn't his fault at all. He wasn't possessive and truly understood and respected her.
But sometimes, just sometimes, she kept wondering if Yuri was okay, if she already had eaten, if she was sleeping well, mostly wondering if… if she ever thinks about her might as well.
About their kiss, about Kitty's love letter. Does any of that ever cross Yuri's mind?
Does Yuri frequently think about her, just as often as Kitty thinks about her?
“Is there something bothering you, Covey?” Minho asked, looking a little bit confused, Kitty had a sad look in her eyes. He could tell something was off.
“Hmmm.. I’m just wondering if Yuri is doing well. With all the divorce stuff and her family apparently going bankrupt or something like that. I heard Alex talking about this so… That's a lot to deal with right now.” Kitty started to explain it, feeling a bit overwhelmed because she wasn't really sure how Minho felt about Yuri or how he was going to react about her mentioning Yurii. He was the one who caught them kissing in the first place. “She is my friend, so I really worry about her sometimes. That 's all.”
The truth is, Minho felt a little jealous of the way Kitty talked about the other girl. The affection in her voice was clear, the way her voice trembled when she said that name, how her eyes darkened and she was immediately unable to maintain eye contact —it killed the boy inside. The girl's dilated pupils made everything obvious, even if she tried to deny it to her death.
He kept all those feelings to himself. Despite everything, he trusted Kitty.
“I bet she’s okay, you know. You know Yuri, she’s all spoiled and bossy. But you’re a good friend for worrying about her.” The boy gently stroked the corner of her face with his hands. “Don’t worry so much. She’ll be fine, okay? Yuri is strong.”
“Yeah, but Yuri is much more than just a spoiled and bossy-bratty girl. She has a huge heart and suffers in silence to prioritize others. So I don’t know, I just worry about her.” Kitty didn’t want to start a fight, but deep down her heart ached at the thought of just imagining Yuri suffering. “But maybe you’re right.”
“Don't worry too much, Covey. I'm sure Alex is making her really busy with family stuff. They're in Australia having a vacation. If Yuri doesn't end up being eaten by a shark, I'm sure she will survive everything she is going through.” Minho jokes, making Kitty laugh a little.
“I don't think Yuri can even swim, so I don't think she will ever come close to the ocean to get eaten by sharks, Minho.” Kitty pictured that perfectly, imagining Yuri in a bathing suit at the beach, afraid of getting in the water because of how scared she would be of all the fishes, the jellyfishes especially, and everything else she could think about that could harm her. This made Kitty unconsciously break into a sad smile.
She was missing Yuri so badly.
“Well, even better, so that means she will be okay in Australia.” Minho said confidently, trying to make her laugh again.
But it didn't work because Kitty remembered how Australia had those giant spiders. And how Yuri was terribly afraid of spiders.
“I'll text her just to check if she's ok. Give me just a sec’, please.” Kitty quickly pulled her phone out of her pocket and searched for Yuri's contact. Once she found it, she started typing a message.
But she wasn't really sure what to say exactly.
So after a while, she just typed.
Hi, Yuri. How are u doin in Australia? U ok with all those giant spiders? Lol
Xoxo, Kitty
She felt really stupid typing that, so she just deleted it right after. As if she never really texted Yuri that. Minho still had that apprehensive look; deep down he knew Kitty was confused about how to act around Yuri.
[...♡…]
Summer ended, and Yuri hadn't even sent a single message to Kitty. Things with Minho had become increasingly boring. When classes finally resumed, the group of friends was reunited. Yuri was back; she and Kitty had vague conversations at KISS, and even as friends, they still maintained a certain distance.
Yuri watched all those interactions between Kitty and Minho and was dying inside; hiding her jealousy was proving to be a terribly difficult task. Probably the hardest of her life. Despite sharing a dorm room, the two barely met there.
“Did you know Kitty had a picture of you in her room from when she liked you?” Q brought up the subject randomly while they were sitting on the couch, just him and Yuri watching a queer movie. “I saw it once. It was a polaroid from the day you went to get the cassette player. I thought it was pretty cute. She was really in love with you before you fucked up everything.”
Yuri had never really noticed this. She had never been in Katherine's room. But it was a comment that certainly made her heart race as if it were about to explode.
“Why are you telling me this?” Han questioned, trying to calm her own heart.
“Because it’s obvious you like her. It’s noticeable that you’re practically jumping on Minho out of sheer jealousy towards the two of them together. It’s funny because you wasted the opportunity when you could have had her all for you, when she would definitely have picked you. Seriously, you lesbians are so dramatic. Like, look at you now. Pathetic. Suffering in the corners because of her. I understand Kitty being a bisexual mess. But you truly are the most insufferably complicated lesbian I know.” He teased his friend, but in reality, he just wanted her to take action. “For once in your life, be honest with your feelings, Han Yuri. Just tell her how you really feel.”
“You realize that she's dating Minho, right? That me coming up with a whole love confession would cause so much unnecessary drama between our group friends, right?” Yuri starts to speak, getting up from the sofa.
Q smirks.
“Oh, so you actually agree that you are in love with her right now.” He says absolutely flabbergasted, but definitely enjoying the tea.
“Is that what this is all about?” Yuri sighs deeply, trying to adjust her posture. “OK, I'll admit it. You won. Yes, I'm fucking in love with Kitty. I probably always have been, way before the kiss. Even before she could even confess her love with that love letter. Because since she came into my life, everything felt truly different. I wanted to be closer and closer with her even if at first we kinda hated each other. Suddenly all I wanted to hear was her laugh, her silly jokes, somehow, her smile became my favorite. Even back when I was dating Juliana. My life turned yellowish because of Kitty. She became the prettiest girl I had seen. I started to miss her when she was not around, and when she tried to kiss me, back at the practice room I stood there, waiting for her to actually do it. Yes, I'm a pathetic, loser lesbian, who had the chance to have her and lost her to a boy who claimed her to be his saesang with that misogynistic ass behavior. And I'm fucking jealous of Minho because he is the one dating her right now. That's what you wanna hear, Q?”
“Yuri…I think you should-” Q said it with an apprehensive look, but Yuri didn't let him finish his sentence.
“I miss her so badly it hurts. I always think everything could've been different if i was brave to tell her the truth. What would've happened if I said that I loved her back. If I wasn't a fucking. I don't deserve her, but I wish she was mine. Not because I see her as a possession of mine, but because I wish I had the chance to make her my girlfriend. Sometimes all I keep thinking is that maybe, just maybe, I could've loved her the right way.
Maybe… Just maybe I could've been the one. The right choice. The only dream I have is Kitty to be in love with me again, just one more time, so then I can make things right. When I lay on the bed Kitty is the first person that comes to my mind. I just can't stop thinking about her. ” Yuri could feel the tears coming up from her eyes. She started sobbing uncontrollably. “I love her. I truly love her. I love Kitty more than anything. But she doesn't belong to me.”
“Is that really true, Yuri? You love me?”
That voice wasn't Q's.
It was Kitty.
Katherine freaking Song Covey.
That was right there the whole time. Listening to her say all of them. She just witnessed a love confession.
Yuri was hundred percent sure her heart stopped for a second and she felt like it was about to faint at any moment.
“Do you… Do you actually mean that?” Kitty asked again, her voice cracked, getting closer to the other girl. Q was having a blast, because that wasn't intentional at all, he didn't expect Kitty to come back. “Why didn't you tell me all of that? You just acted like my feelings were one-sided, but you did… You did love me back.”
“I was afraid. Look, Kitty. I've never had a friendship like ours. Never once in my life. You became very important and dear to me, so when I realized what was happening right in front of me I completely panicked. I thought it would lose you forever. So I stepped back, because I didn't see myself being a good girlfriend to you. And I was so confused because I truly believed that I had to be with Juliana, because she was back to be with me again. Even though I wasn't sure of my feelings for her, I tried to insist on it, even after we had broken up. Because it felt the right thing to do, I felt like I owed that to her. But deep down, I always knew that I was in love with you all the way. But I had so many things going on, that bringing you into the mess didn't feel right. You already had your problems. I'm sorry for making you feel like your feelings weren't valid or that they were one-sided. That was never true. I… I have loved you since the first day you crashed into my life. I was just too afraid to admit it. But I'm truly sorry for making you sad and upset because I ended up minimizing your feelings for me. I've hurt you because I tried to not hurt others and that's fucked up.” Yuri felt like a huge weight had been lifted from her chest; saying all those words aloud seemed completely unreal. “You deserve better. You always deserved better than me. I can never offer you the quiet love you deserve. I overthink. I'm insecure. Sometimes I'm too jealous and grumpy. I have so many flaws. I'm not a princess that has come to rescue you from a fairy tail.”
Kitty was in a state of complete shock.
“You don't have the right to say all of this to me right now. Ugh. Han Yuri, you just… You broke my heart last semester, and now, there you are, saying that you would do anything to win me back to Q. That you always loved me. That 's not fair. That's not how things are supposed to work.” Kitty felt as if her heart was stuck in her throat, her breathing became harder because she was very anxious. “I broke up… I broke up with Minho.” Yuri raised her eyes, looking directly at Kitty when she said that. “Because even if he was in fact a prince charming, I couldn't love him in the same way as he loves me. I thought it could, at first I really tried, but… It became boring. It became predictable. Too safe. And all of that… Because I couldn't stop thinking about you. Every thought I had came straight back to you. I need… I need a minute to breathe.”
Q definitely didn't see that coming.
“I'll let you guys talk privately.” The boy warned before leaving. “Don't worry I'm not telling anyone about this.”
Yuri just nodded her head.
Kitty was still pretty much speechless.
“Kitty. I'm really sorry. You don't have to say anything else right now. If you want I can leave. I don't want to make you feel uncomfortable or anything.”
“No. Don't leave. Please.” Covey replied. “I want you right here. Exactly where you are. I want-”
“I want to be with you wherever you are.” Yuri confessed, just as if she was finishing Kitty's sentence.
“Yuri, I just need a little time to think. But please stay here with me. I want you to be near me.” Kitty said gently. “I'm not quite sure of what would be appropriate or suitable right now for us.”
“Don't worry. You just broke up with Minho. I'll wait however long it takes.” Yuri said, looking at Kitty's charming brown eyes. “Hm… Can I hug you a bit? I really miss your perfume.”
“Oh, please.” Kitty lips trembled. Once Yuri's arms enveloped her body, she let out a long, relieved sigh. The warmth of her body warmed her as well. “Can we just watch a movie a bit until I fall asleep?”
“Yeah, come closer. I'll grab a blanket for you and a few pillows.” Yuri said, smiling ear to ear.
“It's fine. I can lay my head onto your lap.” Kitty was so smooth about it, that they both laughed.
“Sure, Song. Whatever you want.” Yuri replied coming back from the room with the blanket already.
“Song?” Kitty wondered, completely mesmerized by what she just said.
“Yeah. Cuz you're a Song. That's your mom's last name, right? Everybody calls you Kitty, Praveena even calls you Kittycat, and Minho, he acts like a parrot calling you Covey a thousand times a day. Katherine is too formal, so I just decided to call you Song, because it reminds me of your connection with your mother and in general, how we are connected because of them might as well. It's like the red string for us.” Yuri explained with a soft smile on her lips. “You don't like it?”
“I definitely do. It's just that nobody really calms that. But I really appreciate it.” Kitty gently approached Yuri's body and laid her head onto her lap, while Yuri kept touching her hair.
“I'm sure you do, Song. Now let's watch the damn movie.” Yuri jokes.
[...♡…]
Two weeks later, Kitty and Yuri were already secretly dating. But they've decided to wait a little bit more before making it public. So they made Q swear to his life that he wouldn't tell anyone.
But Minho knew Kitty broke up with him because of Yuri, so he was suspicious, along with most of their friends.
Kitty and Yuri were at the dorm.
“I'll give you a kiss for every sentence you got it right, Song.” Yuri told Kitty. She was currently giving her Korean lessons so Kitty's grades would improve a little bit faster. She was indeed already better than the past two semesters, but was far away from being actually fluent or enough. “What do you think?”
“What about me stealing a kiss from you just right now?” Kitty said in a very bratty way. She inclines her body as she tries to catch Yuri's lips. “Gimme a smooch. Just one and I'll promise to study non-stop. Don't be mean to your girlfriend.”
“Gosh. You're such a mess.” Yuri laughs out loud while Kitty is pretty much pouting in front of her. She knows she can't resist for long. “Fine, Song. Just one and you will focus on studying. Are we clear?”
“Yes, my beautiful bossy-spoiled-rich girlfriend. I'll do whatever you want. Now gimme my smooch.” Kitty's smile keeps growing. “Please, my pretty Yuri.”
Yuri approaches and places her hands around Kitty's face, gently touching her cheeks with her fingers and subtly bringing their noses together. Their lips meet, and Kitty slowly opens her mouth, just enough for Yuri to slide her warm tongue inside. A shiver runs through the younger girl's entire body.
The sensation of their tongues brushing against each other overwhelms Covey's senses. She bites Han's lower lip and pulls her closer, squeezing her waist with a force charged with possessiveness and desire at the same time. Yuri moans without the intention to. She can't keep that to herself.
She feels intoxicated by Kitty's touch; her hands are firm, and she knows exactly where to touch and squeeze. Yuri doesn't need much to get as excited as Katherine. She feels things moving quickly, then, breathless, she breaks the kiss.
“Kitty. Back to study. Right now.” Yuri says, reuniting all her forces.
“You're so annoying. Ugh. Sure, pretty. Back to studying. ” Kitty's lips are completely swollen and red and her eyes are filled with pure luxury.
It takes a whole minute, but Yuri recovers from the kiss.
[...♡…]
Kitty and Yuri decided to have a date a few days later. It's the weekend so they are not at the school.
There's this really nice cinema that Yuri is sure Kitty is going to like, so she makes sure to take her on a special date.
While they are walking, Kitty realizes sometimes that makes her laugh.
“Why are you laughing, dear?” Yuri wonders.
"It's just that I just realized that every time we're together you wear shoes that make you taller than me, as if you can't accept being the shorter one in our relationship. It's always platform sneakers, or boots with heels that make you seem taller. I noticed this just now looking at you and I couldn't help but laugh." Kitty says, mocking the older girl. “Its such a cute detail and obviously a move only Yuri Han would pull..”
“Be quiet, Song. That's not even remotely true.” Yuri says pouting. “It's just… just pure coincidence!”
“Oh yeah, sure, pretty girlfriend. I'll pretend I'll believe it.” Katherine kissed her cheek. “It's just 4 cm. You know you don't have to do that, right?”
“You're the younger one already. You can't be the taller one as well.” Yuri holds her arm around hers while they walk. “So, just leave that to me, Song.”
“You're so dramatic, Han.” Kitty has to laugh, but she's so happy to have Yuri as her girlfriend. “But if that makes you happy, it's fine.”
“You make me happy, Kitty. Being with you makes me happy.” Yuri stops for a second. “I love you. And it's fate. To be with you. It's fate.”
“I love you too, Yuri.” Kitty kisses Yuri's lips gently, not for long, but just enough to warm their bodies.
After the cinema is accomplished, they go back to their dorm. On Sunday, they decided to meet their friends for a picnic, so they had to sleep early.
It doesn't take long,Kitty sleeps embraced by Yuri, hugging her deeply after they shower and put on their pajamas; their sleep is light and peaceful because nothing actually bothers them.
The next day, they're picking outfits. It doesn't take long. Once they are ready, they leave for the picnic.
Kitty is wearing a soft-pink t-shirt, while she wears a long white skirt and a pair of pink shoes. Yuri's look is very yellowish as well, she's wearing a yellow crop top and light white jeans, while she wears a white-yellow pair of shoes.
Praveena looks at them, and they can immediately tell. Those clothes aren't Yuri's. That's too yellowish for her. And Kitty's definitely wearing designer clothes that aren't definitely hers. Not that she's poor, but she's pretty sure she already saw Yuri wearing that white long skirt the other day.
Jin cleared his throat, making a noise, to get the others' attention.
"So… When are you going to tell us you're dating?" He said, suppressing a laugh.
"What? We're not dating." Kitty said, raising her eyebrows and feigning ignorance.
She and Yuri had decided to keep it a secret, at least for a little bit more days.
“Kitty. You're literally wearing a MiuMiu outfit. No shade, but that's definitely Yuri's clothing. Besides, you never wear pink.” Madison said and everyone nodded their heads simultaneously.
“Well, I woke up today feeling like I could wear pink. That's not a crime. Is it?” Kitty defended herself from the further accusations.
“No. But you never actually wear long-skirts as well. That's some atrocious shit only Yuri does because of her artsy style.” Juliana points out wanting to laugh because she can smell Yuri getting offended real quick.
“Also, Yuri barely wears crop tops. And they're definitely not yellow, Covey.” Minho sighs. “Look. If it's because of me, honestly I don't care. It's like the fourth time this week that we can clearly tell that you guys are sharing clothes.”
“Is it really that obvious?” Yuri asks, still lowkey offended by Juliana talking about her artsy looks.
“Yeah. We know u guys are f word.” Jin said, sitting on the grass. “It's fine. Just make it public.”
They did not f word. Not yet.
Yuri looked at Kitty. “Yes. We are dating.”
“Fine. Now let's eat because I'm actually starving.” Madison confesses to approaching the food everyone has brought.
They all laughed.
“I can't believe you decided to wear pink, Song.” Yuri whispered in Kitty's ear, provoking her.
“Be quiet, Han. Or you're not getting any smooches from me later.” Kitty replied, making the other one blush real hard. “I love you.”
“I love you more, Song. You will never be a mistake for me.”