Chapter Text
James. Jimmy Novak. Jimmy. Are you there?
Jimmy recognized the angel immediately. He tried to locate where its presence was coming from, but there was nothing to look at - he couldn’t see anything. He couldn’t feel, either; he didn’t even think there was air to breathe. In fact, if his sense of proprioception was to be trusted, he didn’t have a body. What was the last thing he remembered? A demon had shot him, and then he’d used his dying breaths to let Castiel the angel take control of him again. And then there was the constant brightness, the ringing - he didn’t know if it had been a millisecond or a million years since he was bleeding out on the floor of that barn. Had the angel kept him until the end of the universe? The end of time?
The presence reached out to him once more.
The universe has not ended.
Its return startled Jimmy, which seemed to… amuse it?
Is something wrong?
Jimmy snorted, or at least, he would have if he had air to snort or a nose to snort with. Nothing can possibly be wrong; there’s nothing here at all, he thought distantly. The presence was amused again. Stop laughing at me when I can’t even hear you! I don’t even know how you’re doing it, but you are. You’re laughing at my thoughts!
I apologize, I realize this is not a human method of communication. Wait one moment, please.
After a few seconds - or years; time was undefinable, Jimmy got his first bit of sensory input since all that angelic buzzing had stopped: he could feel part of his face. Or a face, or a simulation of some human mouth. He cleared his throat, because that was something he could do now, and he spoke. “Castiel? It’s you, right?”
Yes.
Jimmy could hear himself speaking, but Castiel’s voice still wasn’t quite… a voice. It seemed to come from every direction at once, and it was nothing like a human voice.
“Where are we? Where are you?”
The archangel smote me. They destroyed both of us on a molecular level.
“What?! If I- if we- Then how are we here? Wherever ‘here’ is, anyway.”
I feel that my father restored me.
“Your father. God? Why would He bring you back if the archangel had you killed?”
Yes. I believe He has more work for me. Raphael smote me to ensure that Lilith would be killed. I betrayed Heaven’s plan.
“He sm- Wait, you did WHAT?”
I think Heaven has gone rogue after my father’s departure. They needed to kill Lilith because she was the only thing holding Lucifer back. When I awoke, I was attached to your body again. I don’t know why.
“You said that God restored you, but that- that still doesn’t explain how I came back. What happened?”
Raphael’s powers left your soul heavily damaged. I had to rebuild you piece by piece. I wasn’t finished reattaching your soul back to your body yet. That’s why none of your senses are of any use to you at this moment.
“You were the one who brought me back? You needed permission to get back into my vessel?”
No, Jimmy, that isn’t why I brought you back. When I woke up and started to rebuild your soul, I was already in your vessel.
“Then why did you bring me back if you didn’t need to?”
For the first time in their conversation, Castiel’s not-voice hesitated.
Every human soul is created by my father. I don’t feel right allowing the existence of a soul to simply end. Another pause. And… I wanted to give you another choice. Jimmy, I may have been given control, but… if you prefer that I leave, I will not force you to keep me. I’m confident that I will be able to restore your connection to your human body so that you can live again.
“I don’t need that. You can stay in my vessel.”
The angel paused again. It had to stop doing that, because it was putting Jimmy on edge every time it did. Every time he did?
Jimmy, I will be alright if you cast me out. My survival does not require a vessel.
Jimmy tried his best to project the energy of briskly shaking his head in refusal. “No. No. Even if you leave me alone, there’s no way I can start over with everything else that’d be chasing me. Going back to my family would be like inviting demons straight into my home, again. And thanks to whatever you did, there’d probably be angels to worry about too.”
You wish to remain my vessel?
“Yes.”
This time, there was no holy light descending from the sky to take control of him -- It was simply a latent cosmic force letting go of the restraints it had put on itself. And this time, Jimmy knew exactly how bright it would all be.