Chapter Text
Reki thought he wasn’t good enough.
No, he knew that.
Watching Langa succeed, landing tricks on the first try while Reki practiced for months and still couldn’t get them right… he was proud. He really was.
But at the same time, deep inside him, a fire filled with poisonous flames began to grow, while another gentle and warm grew smaller and weaker every day.
His passion faded, bit by bit, until it became nothing more than a speck of dust, carried away by the wind. Sometimes it drifted close to Reki, but never close enough to reach.
At first, Reki desperately tried to grab that tiny thing, that ash-gray spark in his heart that had once been the biggest part of him. He reached for it again and again, sometimes burning his hands on the poison flames surrounding it.
He didn’t mind. Actually… he almost loved the pain.
Whenever he got hurt from overworking himself, he felt a strange sense of pride.
Yes, he achieved something.
It was a scar, but it was something. A change. An accomplishment. He worked for it, poured sweat and blood into it.
Slowly, those scars began to grow on his soul.
Slowly but surely, they escaped their mental cage and appeared on his skin, forming red and white lines in hidden corners of his body.
Soon, keeping razor blades in random places around his home didn’t seem strange anymore.
Under his pillow.
In his phone case.
On his desk.
There was always one nearby, so he could use it.
And he did.
Oh, he did so often that after some time, it became hard just to stand up. Every limb felt like a heavy weight. Sometimes he wanted to get rid of them but at the same time, he liked that something was pulling him down. Deeper and deeper into a miserable state he could never escape from.
At least… not alone.
The thing was, Reki, the little red-haired skateboarder...was alone.
God, he felt so alone.
Every time he met with the others, it felt like he was drifting further away. He wanted to be noticed. Wanted to be loved. But he never felt that way, after all, he wasn’t Langa.
Lately, he couldn’t even get close to them at S. They were stars, and he was stuck in the mud below, out of reach.
So Reki got worse.
He skipped meals.
Skipped school.
Skipped everything...rotting away in his room, forcing himself to keep up a happy façade.
He still played the role of the cheerful bean of the group. Forced jokes. Forced chuckles. Even though, deep inside, there was nothing to laugh about.
He kept his ugly side hidden. He thought he couldn’t afford to show any more weakness.
So he hid,
from his family,
his friends,
his teachers.
It wasn’t difficult. He was used to it.
No one noticed when he cut himself at thirteen.
No one noticed when he skipped meals at fourteen, hoping it would make him skate better.
(It didn’t.)
Despite everything, Reki still went to S that night.
He stood by the wall, watching Langa skate, cheering for him, encouraging him, while jealousy gnawed at his soul.
But he didn’t know yet how special this night would become.
“Hey, redhead!”
An unfamiliar voice snapped him out of his thoughts. The boy was handsome ,black hair, an ethereal jawline, the newest skater clothes, and a sweet smile.
“Hey… what’s up?”
Reki answered after a moment, slightly mesmerized. The boy looked older. Confident.
“I’m good. But what about you?” He tilted his head. “Aren’t you jealous? Being the one who isn’t Langa?”
Reki had hoped he might make a new friend tonight, but it felt like the same story again. The cuts on his arms burned more than usual. He couldn’t say anything. He just looked down.
“Chill, bro, I didn’t mean it like that. Sorry. I just thought… you were still cool.”
“Me? Cool?”
The words slipped out before Reki could stop them. How could he be cool? He was a loser. A talentless one at that.
“Yeah. I’ve seen some of your tricks. They’re cool. I learned them.”
So he learned them…
Then he must be better.
“So I was thinking,” the boy continued, “why don’t we skate together? I think I could make you a better skater.”
“A better skater?”
“Yeah. One who could even surpass Snow.”
Him?
Reki Kyan surpassing Langa, his cool, ethereal star he admired?
No way.
This guy had to be lying.
But it felt real. And Reki couldn’t bring himself to say no. He had nothing to lose. Even if he didn’t get better, he might gain a friend.
“I’d like to skate with you.”
“Oh wow, I’m so happy!”
The boy jumped forward and hugged him.
And Reki, he smiled.
A real smile.
He hadn’t felt this happy in weeks.
“Oh, by the way, my name’s Fujimura Kuro.”
“Nice to meet you, I’m Kyan Reki.”
That night, they made a promise to skate together.
And Kuro promised he would make Reki the best skater that ever existed.