Chapter Text
“so, not a big swimmer, huh?”
luca still looks at her like he’s surprised she’s even talking to him. not that she ever gave him the silent treatment. it’s funny, the way his eyes get all big and his eyebrows unknit whenever she says anything to him that isn’t, like, an ancient curse or an insult of some sort. he shakes his head slightly, cheeks flushing.
“i mean, i can swim,” he says quickly, pulling his knees up to his chest. “i just didn’t bring a bathing suit, that’s all.”
“you didn’t bring a bathing suit to the beach?” lilliana asks wryly.
“you’re not swimming either,” he protests. he’s got her there. she shrugs and stares out at the rest of the group splashing around down in the water. afternoon sunlight glitters on the crests of the waves, sea foam lapping at the shore in a steady rhythm, like breathing. the sand is cool under the umbrella where lilliana sits with luca, and she digs her fingers into it, watching it run between the cracks in her clenched fist.
the first time she met luca, she could tell right away he was another one of milly’s stray cats, even though he wore a crisp blue polo shirt and a nice watch. that watch was ruined in the ocean two months later. luca wasn’t the same as someone like jack, poor and outcasted, but she could still tell he was in need— of what, it didn’t matter. friendship, a place to belong. not money, but that was about the last thing cape june offered anyway.
she thought he was probably going to be a spoiled, arrogant european, like that girl jack was always with during the school year, so she had a little fun with him. the hazing process, as it were. make him think she hated him. but the more time she spent with him the more she realised he definitely did not deserve to have his feelings thrown around. he was too earnest, too hopeful for that. plus, he was obviously beloved by the rest of the group, and he kind of grew on her like weeds. she’s become kind of fond of him now. but if he still thinks of her as the girl who works in the purple tent and never smiles, as he called her to milly a couple weeks after they first met, then she isn’t going to correct him. she’s spent time building up that reputation, after all.
“i didn’t bring a bathing suit from italy,” luca clarifies after a few moments of silence, staring decidedly out at the horizon. lilliana scoffs.
“that was kind of dumb.”
he shifts uncomfortably, his knees sinking down to lay flat on his beach towel again. lilliana shoots him a sidelong glance and notices the black mass of his binder is visible through his white t-shirt.
“if it makes you feel any better, i don’t have a bathing suit either,” she says in a blasé voice, because she knows luca really wants to have a sad outcast moment about his gender identity and she doesn’t want to sit through that. the thing is, milly’s got the same problem and he just sucks it up and wears a bikini top with swim trunks. it’s the confidence that sells it. no one cares if you’ve got breasts or not when you’re surfing or swimming against the cape june tide. they’re just mesmerised.
“how come?” luca sighs, looking wistfully out at the water.
“no point,” lilliana says. “i burn so easily i don’t even bother going out in the sun.”
“huh.” luca sits up a little straighter, considering it. “i guess i never thought about that. i mean, you work at the boardwalk, aren’t you outside all the time?”
“i work in a tent,” lilliana corrects him. “i haven’t owned a bathing suit since junior high. it doesn’t matter how much spf i slather on, i’ll get a gnarly sunburn no matter what.”
“that sucks,” luca says absently.
“yeah, it does. next time you’re ruining your own fun like this just think about the fact that at least you tan and don’t burn.”
luca nods and looks down quickly, resting his hands on his thighs. lilliana lets the sand run through her fingers again with a slow sigh. luca really needs to get out there and do something. surf, night swim, go sailing, learn to skateboard or roller skate or whatever. he really needs to stop being so in his own head. doesn’t he realise how good he’s got it? how good he’s going to have it for the rest of his time in cape june? how cared for he is?
she watches him from the corner of her eye. apparently not.