Chapter Text
Today was like any other day, the sun reflected through my pale complexion. Its rays can be felt by both me and another me. Kongo Sensei has summoned me which doesn’t happen often, so that makes me happy. I wonder what he needs for me to be summoned out of all the gems.
The moment I met him face to face, it filled me with anticipation. Thus, he started speaking.
“Ghost Quartz, I will assign you a new partner. Will there be any objections?”
“No, Sensei.”
“Very well then, you can come out now.”
I turn to look behind me, strutting nearby was a gem I have met beforehand but seldom interacted with. With a dark blue complexion mixed with gold, its luscious hair was its most identifiable feature. It was none other than the nimble Lapis Lazuli.
“Pleased to meet you, Ghost Quartz.” They spoke, lifting their naturally long hair.
“Likewise.” I replied, and with that we both became partners.
Lapis Lazuli was the Librarian. There was only so much one gem could handle before textbooks started piling up. I understood why Kongo Sensei wanted to pair me up with them.
I had no particular interest in books. In my defense, I was never really interested in anything. My body moves on its own; although I am capable of thought, it is as if the passenger is the body and the body is the passenger. A slave to my own instincts one may infer.
I do not wish to be seen in any way. The concept of me exists, I can be perceived by the other gems. Although I wish that were not the case.
On the other hand, Lapis Lazuli was smart and self-secure.
Frankly, they never cared about how the gems perceived them. They spend most of their time re-arranging books, helping gems find specific studies they wish to read, and maintain the library. They’re dedicated to the job out of pure passion for knowledge and understanding. I am here to compliment that passion as their new partner.
They were always curious about their surroundings, perpetually questioning the logic of concepts. Teetering over the edge of reason and challenging the universe. It was as if they had the world in the palm of their hands but could never hold it and its entirety, yet they still persevered; which reminded me of who I once was. I, too, was once filled with dreams and ambition. But even the most determined gemstones eroded, eventually my mind surrendered to the cosmos along with my will to understand it.
Aside from casual conversation and work related exchanges, nothing stirred between me and Lapis. Safe to say it will stay that way. I wish not for our dynamic to change, I like the way we are now. Even if we get sent to missions regarding sun spots, this relationship of ours is strictly professional, nothing more and nothing less.
That was until we had a close call, when the two of us fought a new type of lunarian.
It wasn’t just another foe with a quirky gimmick, it was using pieces of our own comrades as arrowheads and that threw us both off. The mental damage and lethality of such ammunition was simply too much, even for Lapis themselves. Luckily, Kongo Sensei and the other gems came at the right time.
We retreated to the school and got our broken parts fixed by Rutile. When the doctor left to let the resin settle in our bodies, that’s when Lapis spoke to me in a natural but endearing tone, something they haven't done before. They never needed to change the way they talked until now.
“I know you’re fine, Ghost. You always picked yourself up, even after being shattered multiple times. But something tells me this time is different.” Lapis said, staring down at their leg that was shattered moments ago.
“They’re using our friends to fight against us, isn’t that weirdly messed up? What’s worse is that-” They stopped to get closer to me.
“Well... I’m gonna tell you a secret, can you keep it for me?” They whispered, looking directly at me.
I stared at Lapis for a moment, meeting their dead serious expression head on. It’s weird to say the least, I have never seen them like this. If this is what it has come to, then it must be something of utmost importance.
“Yes, I shall keep it to myself.” I replied with a stern expression painted across my face. I was eager to keep whatever Lapis wanted to share deep inside my inclusions, never to be let out.
Lapis went intimately close to my ear, whispering words that I have never once thought would come out of their solid lips.
“I want to go to the moon.”
“I want to know more about the Lunarians, I need to know why they’re trying to kill us. Kongo Sensei is hiding something from us and I demand and answer.”
“I need to know everything and anything, such as our immortality, our origin and connection with them and the admirabilis, especially how you came to be and what’s going on inside your head.”
They rested their palms into my cheeks, it’s as if they were looking at me and through me.
“You’re a two face, you are indeed Ghost Quartz but your character doesn’t match your actions. It’s as if there’s something else inside of you that makes you move. It’s like you’re not even there, you’re just a shell for show that is occupied by a parasite.”
They were so eager to know more about me, but I didn’t exactly know myself. I neither questioned my existence nor my actions. Maybe that is the problem, I have my own thoughts but never my own actions. I'm nothing but a slave to my own whims which doesn’t belong to me.
The fact that Lapis was so intrigued by me, it felt so new. For the first time in ages, it felt good to be perceived by anyone other than Kongo Sensei.
“You’re interesting and I am glad you are with me. Let’s stay partners shall we?” Lapis asked, leaning towards me.
“So long as you keep my little secrets that is.” They said, with that same old smirk they would always give me whenever we talked. Although this time, it felt different.
“Your secrets are safe with me.” I whispered.
“I wouldn’t want to be anyone else’s partner but you.” The words came right out of my mouth. It felt natural, as if it came from me. It was not a whim, this time it came from the heart.
A gem that creeped its way onto me, they coddled me with kindness and a gaze filled with curiosity. It makes me feel special. Something about them is different, the way they make me feel is nothing like how Kongo Sensei does for me. It is more intimate and personal, the warmth it brings inside of my chest makes me concerned and anxious; I do not mind feeling this way, for this sensation is bringing me immense joy and fulfilment.
Is this what they call Admiration?