Work Text:
Three hours.
Nakaupo na ako dito sa same spot sa Meow & Brews for exactly three hours, fourteen minutes, and twenty-two seconds. Yung laptop ko? Bukas. Yung spreadsheet ko? Walang laman kundi yung blinking cursor na parang nangi-insulto na sa akin.
"Work from home," they said. "It will be productive," they said.
Productive my foot. Paano ako magiging productive kung yung view ko ay si Jhoanna Robles na kasalukuyang nakikipag-usap sa isang fat orange cat na ang pangalan—kung tama ang pagkakarinig ko kanina—ay Siopao?
"Siopao, wag mong kainin yung tissue, bad yan," Jhoanna cooed, her voice doing that specific pitch shift na ginagamit niya kapag animals or babies ang kausap. Naka-squat siya sa floor, wiping a spilled latte with a rag while balancing a tray on her other hand. Yung apron niya, medyo tabingi. Yung messy bun niya, totoong messy na, may ilang strands ng buhok na nalalaglag sa mukha niya.
Lord, patawarin niyo ako, pero gusto ko maging tissue. O kaya si Siopao.
I took a sip of my drink. Lasang damo.
Here’s the thing: I hate Matcha. I absolutely despise the grassy, earthy taste of it. Mas gusto ko pa uminom ng purong asukal na may konting kape. But three weeks ago, Jhoanna—the owner, head barista, and resident ray of sunshine of this chaotic café—told me with twinkling eyes, “Miss Aiah, try mo yung Matcha Latte ko. Special blend yan, promise, magugustuhan mo.”
Ano bang magagawa ko? Tumanggi? Sa mukhang yan? Sa mga matang yan na parang nagniningning kapag nag-a-alok ng bagong item sa menu?
So, eto na naman ako. Ordering my daily tall Matcha Latte, drinking it like it’s the elixir of life, just because Jhoanna Robles made it with her own two hands. Even watching her whisk the matcha powder makes me feel weak in the knees. The focus in her eyes, yung maliit na kagat niya sa lower lip niya kapag nagsasalin siya ng gatas...
I let out a shaky breath and adjusted my glasses. Focus, Aiah. Act normal.
I typed a random sentence on my laptop just to look busy. The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog. Delete. Jhoanna has really nice arms. Delete! Shit.
Napansin kong tumayo na si Jhoanna mula sa floor at nagpagpag ng kamay. She flashed a smile at a customer entering the door—yung smile na labas lahat ng ngipin, yung smile na nagpapaliit ng mata niya. That smile should be illegal. Or taxed. It’s definitely hazardous to my health.
Napatingin siya sa direksyon ko.
Panic mode: Activated.
Agad kong binalik ang tingin ko sa screen. Kunwari busy. Kunwari binabasa ko yung napaka-importanteng email from a client (na spam message lang naman talaga about hair loss treatment). My heart was hammering against my ribs like a trapped bird.
I heard footsteps approaching. Not just any footsteps. I’ve memorized the cadence of her walk—mabilis, magaan, parang laging nagmamadali pero graceful pa rin. Like a caffeinated deer.
"Miss Aiah!"
I pretended to be startled. Nag-angat ako ng tingin, practicing my best 'calm and composed' expression. Yung expression na nagsasabing, 'Ah, hello, I am a functional adult who is definitely not obsessing over the mole on your neck.'
"Oh, hi Jhoanna," I said. My voice sounded steady. Good job, self. "Musta?"
She beamed at me, wiping her hands on her apron. May konting matcha powder sa pisngi niya. Gusto kong abutin at punasan, pero baka himatayin ako kapag dumikit ang balat ko sa balat niya, so wag na lang.
"Eto, stressed kay Siopao," she laughed, gesturing to the cat na ngayon ay natutulog na sa ibabaw ng espresso machine. "Ikaw? Pangatlong oras mo na 'yan ah. Grabe naman ang dedication sa work. Baka ma-burnout ka niyan?"
Hindi ako ma-bu-burnout kakatingin sa'yo. In fact, you are my energy source. Photosynthesis is shaking.
"Deadlines," I lied smoothly. "You know how it is."
"Sabagay," she nodded sympathetically. Then, she looked at my cup. "Hala, ubos na agad yung Matcha mo? Grabe, favorite mo talaga 'no?"
I felt a bead of sweat roll down my back. "Ah... oo. Sobra. The... earthiness? It really... wakes me up."
"Sabi sa'yo eh!" Jhoanna clapped her hands, looking ridiculously proud of herself. "Alam mo, try ko next time lagyan ng konting strawberry syrup. Feeling ko magugustuhan mo 'yun. Strawberry Matcha!"
Strawberry and grass. Sounds horrific.
"I can't wait," I said, giving her a small smile. At this point, kahit siguro lason ang ibigay niya sa akin, iinumin ko basta siya ang nagtimpla.
"Sige, sige! Bukas, on the house na 'yun para sa suki namin," she winked.
She winked.
System malfunction. Aiah.exe has stopped working. Please reboot.
Did Jhoanna Robles just wink at me? Was it friendly? Flirty? O baka may puwing lang siya? Baka nerve spasm?
"Thanks, Jho," I managed to say. The nickname slipped out before I could stop it. Usually, it's 'Jhoanna' or implied 'Miss Owner'.
She paused for a split second, and I saw a faint blush tint her cheeks—or maybe that was just the lighting? O baka imagination ko lang kasi desperada na ako?
"No problem... Aiah," she replied, dropping the 'Miss'.
The air shifted. Biglang uminit sa loob ng café kahit naka-todo naman ang aircon. Did the background music suddenly switch to a romantic ballad, or am I hallucinating sounds now too?
She tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear, looking at me with a softness that made my toes curl inside my shoes.
"Nga pala," she started, medyo nahihiya bigla. She started fidgeting with the hem of her apron. "Yung... yung book na binabasa mo yesterday? Yung may blue cover?"
My brain scrambled to retrieve the information. "Ah, The Midnight Library?"
"Oo, 'yun!" she exclaimed, her eyes lighting up again. "Narinig ko kasi maganda daw 'yun eh. Kaso wala pa akong time bumili. Maganda ba talaga?"
This was it. This was my moment.
I am Aiah Arceta, top of my class, successful architect, organized human being. But right now, I am simply a girl standing in front of a pretty barista, willing to sacrifice my entire library.
"It's really good," I said, leaning forward slightly. "Actually... tapos ko na siya. I have it in my bag right now. Do you... want to borrow it?"
Please say yes. Say yes so I have an excuse to talk to you again when you return it. Say yes so I can think about your hands holding the book I held.
Jhoanna’s eyes widened. "Hala, really? Nakakahiya naman! Baka ginagamit mo pa or rereading?"
"No, really. It’s just gathering dust inside my tote bag," I insisted, grabbing my bag and fishing out the book. Inabot ko sa kanya. "Here. Ingatan mo na lang."
She took the book like it was something precious, her fingers brushing against mine for a nanosecond. Kuryente. Legit na kuryente. Meralco could never.
"Thank you, Aiah!" she grinned, clutching the book to her chest. "Promise, babalik ko 'to agad. Baka may messy notes ka dito ha, babasahin ko."
Oh god.
Bigla akong nanlamig. Did I write in that book? Sometimes I annotate. Did I write anything embarrassing? Did I write 'Jhoanna would like this part' in the margins?
I quickly mentally scanned the book's contents. Safe. I think.
"Wala naman masyado," I laughed nervously. "Just... enjoy it."
"I will!" She checked her watch. "Hala, need ko na bumalik sa counter, dumadami na tao. Salamat ulit, Aiah! You’re the best!"
She turned around and jogged back to the counter, shouting orders to her staff.
You’re the best.
Paulit-ulit na nag-e-echo sa utak ko yung boses niya. You’re the best.
Napahawak ako sa pisngi ko. Ang init. Siguro mukha na akong kamatis ngayon. Tiningnan ko yung empty cup ng Matcha Latte sa table ko.
Bukas, iinom ako ng Strawberry Matcha. Next week, baka mag-order na ako ng lahat ng nasa menu. Next month, baka ako na ang bumili ng café na 'to para sa kanya.
Joke lang. Or not.
I stared at her back as she laughed at something a customer said. The way her shoulders shook, the way she comfortably commanded the space.
God, I am so doomed.
Sinara ko na yung laptop ko. Wala na ring sense magtrabaho. My productivity for the day peaked at giving her a book.
Tinawag ko yung isang staff para mag-bill out. I left a tip. A big one. Again. Usually, 20% is generous. I think I just left a 50% tip for a cup of grass water.
Tumayo ako at inayos ang coat ko. Before leaving, sumulyap ulit ako sa counter. Jhoanna was busy making a drink, her tongue poking out slightly in concentration.
Napansin niya siguro na nakatingin ako kasi nag-angat siya ng tingin. She waved her hand—the one holding a milk pitcher—enthusiastically. Mouthing a silent "Bye!"
I waved back, small and shy.
Pagkalabas ko ng café, napasandal ako sa glass wall at napahawak sa dibdib ko. The street noise of Manila rushed back in, pero ang naririnig ko lang ay yung tibok ng puso ko na parang nagwawala.
"Baliw ka na, Aiah," bulong ko sa sarili ko. "Baliw na baliw."
Kinuha ko ang phone ko at nag-type sa notes app ko:
To-do list for tomorrow:
1. Pretend to like Strawberry Matcha.
2. Ask her favorite color.
3. DO NOT FAINT.
I walked towards my car with a goofy smile plastered on my face, ready to do this all over again tomorrow.
Lasang strawberry na may lupa.
That was the verdict. The Strawberry Matcha Latte—bright pink at the bottom, swamp green at the top—tasted exactly like sweet, synthetic strawberry syrup mixed with fresh garden soil. It was visually cute, I’ll give it that. Aesthetic kung aesthetic. Pero yung lasa? It was a culinary crime.
"So?" Jhoanna asked, leaning over the counter, eyes wide with anticipation. Halos dumikit na yung dibdib niya sa glass display ng mga pastries. Her messy bun was held together by a bright yellow clip today. Cute. "Masarap ba? Sabi ko sa'yo bagay yung strawberry sa matcha eh."
I swallowed the concoction, ignoring my taste buds screaming for justice. Tiningnan ko si Jhoanna. Yung hopeful smile niya. Yung way ng pag-tild ng ulo niya to the side waiting for my validation.
"It’s... interesting," I started, voice surprisingly steady. "Actually, masarap siya. The sweetness cuts the... uh, grassiness. Good combo, Jho."
Sinungaling ako. I am a pathological liar. Pero kung ang kapalit naman ng pagsisinungaling ko ay yung pag-aliwalas ng mukha ni Jhoanna, then sign me up for hell. I will drink dirt water for the rest of my life.
"Yes!" She did a little victory fist pump inside the counter. "Sabi na eh! Ilalagay ko na 'to sa official menu starting next week. Ipapangalan ko sa'yo. The Aiah Special."
Nabuga ko ng slight—very slight lang—yung iniinom ko.
"Ha?" I choked, grabbing a tissue faster than light. "The what?"
"The Aiah Special," she repeated casually, wiping the counter even though it was clean. "Tutal ikaw naman nag-inspire nito. Tsaka ikaw unang nakatikim. Cute kaya pakinggan. 'One Aiah Special for takeout please!'"
She giggled.
Ako? I died. Deceased. Cause of death: Jhoanna naming a drink after me.
Kailangan kong kumalma. My heart was doing cartwheels inside my ribcage. Is this flirting? Is this customer service? Is this just Jhoanna being her naturally charming self that ruins my life on a daily basis?
"That’s... that’s really sweet of you," I managed to say, feeling the heat rise to my ears. I fixed my glasses, a nervous tic I’ve developed solely because of her. "Pero baka malugi ka niyan."
"Asus, hindi 'yan," she waved her hand dismissively. Then, her expression shifted. Naging medyo seryoso siya, biting her lip. "Nga pala, Aiah... yung book. The Midnight Library."
"Oh," I straightened up. "Did you read it?"
"Kalahati pa lang!" she said quickly. "Pero grabe, ang ganda. Nakaka-relate ako kay Nora minsan. Yung regrets? Yung 'what ifs'?" She sighed, leaning her chin on her palm, staring at me directly. "Ikaw ba, Aiah? Marami ka bang 'what ifs'?"
Oo. What if halikan kita ngayon? What if sabihin ko sa'yo na kaya lang ako nandito araw-araw ay dahil sa'yo? What if hawakan ko yang kamay mo?
"Everyone has them," I replied vaguely, sipping my strawberry-soil drink just to do something with my mouth other than confessing. "But I try to focus on the 'now'."
Jhoanna nodded slowly, her gaze lingering on my face for a second too long. Or baka imagination ko lang ulit.
"Speaking of 'now'..." she started, drumming her fingers on the counter. "Anong ganap mo this weekend? Like, Saturday?"
Nag-pause ang mundo. Even the espresso machine stopped hissing.
My brain went into overdrive.
Calendar check: Saturday. 10 AM client meeting. 2 PM site visit in Taguig. 5 PM dinner with family.
"Wala naman," I lied straight to her face. "Free ako. Bakit?"
Priorities, Aiah. Clients can wait. Buildings will not collapse if I move a site visit. But Jhoanna asking about my Saturday? That is a once-in-a-lifetime event.
"Oh, really?" Her face brightened. "Kasi... I was planning to go sa Fully Booked sa BGC. Maghahanap sana ako ng ibang books ni Matt Haig. Kaso wala akong kasama, si Stacey kasi may date, si Mikha naman busy. Naisip ko lang... since ikaw nag-recommend nung book..."
She trailed off, looking shyly at the register.
Is she asking me out?
Is. She. Asking. Me. Out?
Kalma, Aiah. Baka naghahanap lang ng tour guide. Baka naghahanap lang ng taga-buhat ng libro. Don’t assume. Assuming leads to pain.
"I can go," I said, my voice sounding a little too eager. I cleared my throat to tone it down. "I mean... I was actually planning to buy some art materials din sa BGC. So, sakto. We can go together."
"Talaga?" She beamed. "Yay! Sige! Saturday, 2 PM? Kita na lang tayo doon? Or sunduin kita?"
Sunduin kita.
"No!" I exclaimed too loudly. Napatingin yung ibang customer. I lowered my voice. "I mean, no need. I’ll meet you there. Sa entrance na lang."
Hindi pwedeng sunduin niya ako. Makikita niya kung gaano ako ka-stress mag-prepare. Makikita niya na magpapalit ako ng outfit limang beses bago umalis.
"Okay! It’s a date!" she chirped happily before attending to a new customer.
It’s a date.
She used the word. She dropped the D-word.
Bumalik ako sa table ko na parang lumulutang. I stared at my laptop screen, purely decorative at this point.
It’s a date.
It’s a date.
It’s a date.
Saturday. 1:45 PM. Fully Booked, BGC.
Nandito ako fifteen minutes early.
Actually, nandito na ako ng 1 PM pa. Nasa kotse lang ako, nagpapalamig ng aircon kasi pinapawisan ako ng malapot kahit naka-linen polo ako and trousers. I aimed for "effortlessly chic," but I feel like I look like "nervous architect trying too hard."
Amoy Le Labo Santal 33 ako. Naligo ako sa pabango. Sana hindi siya ma-suffocate.
I was standing near the entrance, pretending to check my phone, when I saw her.
Jhoanna Robles outside of her barista apron is a dangerous concept.
She was wearing a simple white oversized t-shirt tucked into high-waisted denim shorts, and white sneakers. May dalang tote bag. Naka-lugay ang buhok. She looked fresh, radiant, and painfully simple yet beautiful.
Para siyang slow-motion sa paningin ko habang naglalakad palapit. The crowd parted for her (in my head, at least).
"Aiah!" she waved, jogging the last few steps towards me.
"Hey," I smiled, tucking my phone inside my pocket. "You’re early."
"Excited eh," she laughed. "Kanina ka pa?"
"Kararating ko lang din," I lied again. Pangatlong kasinungalingan ko na 'to this week para sa kanya. My moral compass is broken.
"Tara? Pasok na tayo, ang init sa labas," she said, instinctively reaching out to grab my arm.
She held my arm.
Her skin against my linen sleeve.
Warm. Solid.
Hinila niya ako papasok ng bookstore. I let her drag me. Honestly, she could drag me into a volcano and I’d probably thank her for the warm atmosphere.
Once inside, the smell of new books and coffee calmed me down a bit. Jhoanna immediately went to the Fiction section. Sumunod lang ako sa kanya na parang bodyguard. Or a lost puppy. Take your pick.
"Ito oh," she pointed to a book. "The Humans. Maganda daw 'to sabi sa reviews."
Pinanood ko lang siya. The way her eyes scanned the blurbs. The way she bit the inside of her cheek when she was thinking. The way her brows furrowed slightly when she checked the price tag.
"Mahal pala," she mumbled, pouting. Ibabalik na sana niya yung libro sa shelf.
My wallet was practically screaming inside my bag. Bilhin mo na, Aiah. Bilhin mo na ang buong shelf.
"I can buy it for you," the words slipped out before I could stop them.
Jhoanna looked at me, shocked. "Hala? No! Grabe ka naman. Ang mahal nito, Aiah."
"Treat ko na," I insisted, desperate to spoil her. "Since... uh, libre naman yung Strawberry Matcha ko last time. Return of investment?"
She laughed, hitting my arm lightly. "Luh, scam! 180 pesos lang yung Matcha, 'to 800 plus! Lugi ka sa ROI na 'yan."
"I’m bad at math," I deadpanned. (I am an Architect. My math is excellent. But for her, I will forget how to count.)
"Huwag na," she said firmly but gently. "Next time na lang kapag sweldo. Hanap muna tayo iba."
Naglakad siya papunta sa Filipiniana section. I followed, watching her back. Why is she so stubborn? And why makes that her even more attractive?
Habang tumitingin siya ng mga comics, I stood beside her, trying to gauge the distance between our shoulders. If I move two inches to the left, magdidikit na kami. Should I move? Or is that creepy?
"Ang bango mo," she suddenly said, sniffing the air casually while reading the back of a graphic novel.
I froze. "H-ha?"
Tumingin siya sa akin, sniffing again near my shoulder. "Ang bango mo, Aiah. Ano pabango mo? Amoy... mayaman na mabait."
I felt my face burning up. Mayaman na mabait. "Ah... perfume lang. Just... something I grabbed." (It was my most expensive bottle).
"Bagay sa'yo," she smiled softly, looking straight into my eyes. Within the narrow aisle of bookshelves, feeling ko kami lang ang tao. The ambient noise of the bookstore faded.
Her eyes were dark brown, mesmerizing. May maliit na nunal sa leeg niya na ngayon ko lang nakita nang malapitan kasi hindi siya naka-apron. I wanted to trace it.
"Thanks," I whispered, my throat dry.
"Bagay sa'yo maging mabango," she teased, breaking the tension with a grin. "Kasi mukha kang laging seryoso sa café. Dito, parang... mas relax ka."
Relax? I am currently having a tachycardia attack, Jhoanna.
"I like books," I said simply. "And... good company."
Did I just say that? Did I just flirt back?
Jhoanna stared at me, surprise flickering in her eyes. Then, a slow, genuine blush spread across her cheeks. Not the lighting this time. Legit na blush.
"Ako rin," she said softly. "I like your company, Aiah."
We stood there for a moment, suspended in the silence between the shelves of history books and poetry collections. My hand twitched by my side, wanting to reach for hers.
Just then, a kid ran past us, screaming about comic books, bumping into my leg. The moment broke.
Jhoanna laughed, stepping back. "Tara, tingin tayo sa art section? Diba bibili ka ng materials?"
"Ah, oo. Right. Materials," I stammered. I totally forgot about my fake errand.
As we walked towards the art section, I realized something terrifying.
I wasn't just crushing on her. This wasn't just a simple infatuation because she makes good coffee and has a nice smile.
Watching her excitedly point at a set of watercolor paints, explaining colors to me even though she knows I’m the architect/artist between us... listening to her laugh echo in the quiet store...
I am in love with her.
I am absolutely, irrevocably, disastrously in love with Jhoanna Robles.
And I have no idea how to survive this without making a fool of myself.
"Aiah, look! Color blue oh. Favorite color mo diba?" she held up a tube of Cerulean Blue.
I never told her blue was my favorite color. Not once.
Napansin niya?
"Paano mo nalaman?" I asked, breathless.
"Lagi kang naka-blue eh," she shrugged, smiling innocently. "O kaya white. O kaya black. Pero pag naka-blue ka... mas nag-g-glow ka."
She turned back to the shelf, humming a tune.
I stood there, clutching the strap of my bag, feeling my knees turn to jelly.
Lord, kunin niyo na ako. Or bigyan niyo ako ng lakas ng loob. Kasi konting-konti na lang, luluhod na ako dito sa gitna ng Fully Booked para ialay sa kanya ang buhay ko.
There is a specific kind of hell reserved for people who miss their morning routine.
Alas-onse na ng umaga. Nakahiga ako sa kama, balot na balot sa duvet na parang human burrito. My head felt like it was stuffed with cotton balls, my throat was scratching, and my temperature was battling with the Philippine humidity.
But the worst part? Not the fever. Not the body aches.
The worst part was that I wasn’t at Meow & Brews.
Hindi ko nakita si Jhoanna today.
I stared at the ceiling, miserable. Usually, by this time, nasa pangalawang cup na ako ng kape (or that grassy matcha she forces on me). Usually, nakita ko na yung messy bun niya. Narinig ko na yung tawa niya habang kinakausap si Siopao.
"Baka isipin niya ghosting," I croaked out loud. My voice sounded like a broken exhaust pipe.
What if she thinks I’m ignoring her after our 'date' sa bookstore? What if she thinks I didn’t like the time we spent together? What if she forgets my existence entirely and finds a new favorite customer to torture with strawberry-flavored garden soil?
Overthinking while sick is a dangerous sport.
Inabot ko ang phone ko sa bedside table. No messages. Syempre, wala naman siyang number ko. We follow each other on Instagram (I may or may not have stalked her account until 2019 purely for research purposes), pero hindi naman kami nag-d-DM.
I was about to resign myself to a day of misery and scrolling through her IG stories when the intercom buzzed.
Napakunot ang noo ko. I didn't order food. Wala rin akong inaasahang bisita. Unless my fever demons have manifested into physical form.
Pinilit kong bumangon. Hilong-hilo ako habang naglalakad papunta sa console ng intercom. I pressed the button.
"Yes?"
"Delivery po for Unit 402 via reception," the lobby guard said.
"Wala akong delivery, Kuya," I replied weakly.
"Ma'am, may nag-iwan po dito. Aakyat daw po siya saglit kung papayagan niyo? Kilala niyo daw po. Si..." There was a pause, like the guard was reading a name tag. "Si Jhoanna Robles?"
Nag-stop ang mundo. Or maybe my heart stopped. Either way, something stopped functioning.
Jhoanna? Nandito? Sa building ko? Sa lobby? Aakyat?
"Papasukin niyo po," I said automatically, purely on instinct.
The moment I released the button, panic set in.
Fuck.
Tumakbo ako sa salamin sa hallway. I looked like a disaster.
My hair was a bird's nest.
My eyes were puffy.
I was wearing oversized pajamas with cartoon bears on them.
May Koolfever patch sa noo ko.
"No, no, no," I whispered frantically. Sinubukan kong ayusin ang buhok ko gamit ang mga daliri ko. Tinanggal ko yung Koolfever patch (bad idea, biglang kumikirot ulo ko) tapos dinikit ko ulit (mas bad idea, hindi na dumidikit).
Before I could even brush my teeth or consider changing into something socially acceptable, the doorbell rang.
Okay, Aiah. Calm down. Act cool. Act like a dignified sick person. Not a dying walrus.
Binuksan ko ang pinto nang dahan-dahan.
And there she was.
Jhoanna was wearing her café uniform—black polo shirt with the Meow & Brews logo, apron still tied around her waist—like she just ran out in the middle of a shift. May hawak siyang brown paper bag at isang cup carrier.
She looked worried. Her brows were furrowed, and she was slightly out of breath.
"Aiah!" she breathed out when she saw me. Her eyes scanned me from head to toe, lingering on the failing Koolfever patch on my forehead. "Hala, sabi na eh. May sakit ka."
"Jho?" I leaned against the doorframe for support, partly because I was dizzy, mainly because seeing her this close in my own territory was overwhelming. "Paano mo... how did you know I live here?"
"Nabanggit mo dati diba? Yung sa may kanto lang na pinaka-mataas na building kahilera ng café," she explained quickly, stepping a bit closer but respecting the threshold. "Tapos tinanong ko sa guard kung kilala ka, sabi ko emergency. Sorry, ang creepy ko ba? Hindi ka kasi dumaan kanina eh. Nasanay lang ako na... andun ka pag 8 AM. Tapos nag-aalala ako baka kung napano ka na."
Nag-aalala ako.
She noticed my absence. She’s worried. She left her café to check on me.
I wanted to kiss her. Right there. Germs be damned.
"Hindi, it's okay," I managed to smile, though I felt weak. "You're not creepy. You're... sweet."
Namula siya ng konti. Inangat niya yung paper bag.
"May dala akong lugaw. Luto ni Mama, dinala ko sa shop kanina para sana lunch ko, pero mas kailangan mo. Mainit pa 'to." Then she lifted the cup carrier. "Tsaka syempre... Strawberry Matcha. Without ice. Para warm."
The Strawberry Matcha. Even in sickness, it haunts me.
"Jho, you didn't have to," I whispered. My defenses were crumbling. Seeing her care for me like this was hitting all my weak spots.
"Sige na, kunin mo na," inabot niya sa akin yung mga dala niya. Our fingers brushed. Her hand was warm, grounding. "Kumain ka ha? Need mo ng laman sa tiyan bago uminom ng gamot."
Kinuha ko yung paper bag. "Thank you. Really. I... I don't know what to say."
She looked at me with those soft, puppy-dog eyes. "Pagaling ka, Aiah. Kulang yung araw ko pag wala yung favorite customer ko."
Favorite customer.
She started to back away. "Balik na ako sa shop. Tumakas lang talaga ako. Si Stacey na nagwawala sa counter."
"Wait," I called out.
She paused. "Po?"
"Ingat ka," I said softly. It felt inadequate for the storm of emotions inside me. I wanted to say 'Stay', 'Hold me', 'Marry me'.
"Ikaw din," she smiled, giving me a small wave. "Pahinga ka na. Bye, Aiah!"
Sinara ko ang pinto pagkaalis niya.
Sumandal ako sa likod ng pinto, hugging the paper bag of lugaw to my chest like it was a sacred relic.
Why is she like this? Why does she have to be so dangerously thoughtful?
Dinala ko yung pagkain sa kitchen counter. I opened the container. The lugaw smelled like ginger and chicken and comfort. And beside it, the cup of warm Strawberry Matcha.
Written on the cup in permanent marker was a note in her handwriting:
Get well soon, Aiah! <3 (Inubos ko yung stocks ng strawberry syrup para dito, ubusin mo ha! :P)
Umupo ako sa stool. Sinimulan kong kainin yung lugaw. It was delicious.
Then, I took the cup of warm Strawberry Matcha.
I took a sip.
Warm, sweet strawberry syrup mixed with grassy, earthy matcha. Still tastes like heated soil with sugar. Still objectively weird.
Pero inubos ko.
Simot. Walang tinira.
Dahil galing sa kanya. Dahil effort niya. Dahil iniisip niya ako habang ginagawa niya 'to.
Pagkatapos kumain, humiga ulit ako sa kama. My fever was still there, but my chest felt light.
Binuksan ko ang IG ko. I searched for her name.
Jhoanna Robles (@jhoannarobles).
I typed a message. Deleted it. Typed again. Deleted it.
Finally, I settled on:
Me: Thanks for the lugaw and the drink, Jho. The best lugaw ever. You saved my life today.
Sent.
Two seconds later, nag-reply siya.
Jhoanna Robles: Yieee buti nagustuhan mo! Pagaling ka dyan Miss Architect. See you pag magaling ka na! Miss ka na ni Siopao (at nung barista).
Binitawan ko ang phone ko sa mukha ko.
Napapikit ako at napangiti nang parang tanga sa ilalim ng kumot.
Miss ka na ni Siopao (at nung barista).
Lord, kung lagnat lang ang kapalit para alagaan ako ni Jhoanna, okay lang kahit araw-araw na akong magkasakit.
Actually, wag naman. Kailangan kong gumaling. Because now, I have a new mission.
I need to ask her out on a proper date. Hindi bookstore trip, hindi accidental coffee run. A real date.
Pero bago 'yun, tutulog muna ako. Because dreaming about her is the second best thing to seeing her.
I was ready.
Nakatayo ako sa tapat ng full-length mirror ko, giving myself a pep talk that would put TED Talks to shame. Three days akong absent sa Meow & Brews dahil sa lagnat (at dahil sa emotional recovery from the lugaw incident).
Today, I return. Not as the sick, pajama-clad Aiah who looked like a zombie extra from The Walking Dead, but as Aiah Arceta: Architect, functional adult, and woman on a mission.
My outfit was calculated. A navy blue silk blouse (dahil sabi niya blue is my color), high-waisted beige trousers, and my favorite loafers. Nag-curl pa ako ng dulo ng buhok. I put on that specific shade of lipstick that makes me look approachable but expensive.
My goal? Simple.
-
Give Jhoanna the "Thank You" gift I bought (a limited edition cat-shaped lamp that changes colors—nahanap ko online at pina-rush shipping ko pa).
-
Ask her out on a dinner date. A real one. With candles. And no matcha involved.
"Kaya mo 'yan, Aiah," I whispered to my reflection. "You are charming. You are capable. She delivered soup to your house. The odds are in your favor."
Nag-drive ako papunta sa café with the confidence of a woman who owns the world. Bitbit ko yung paper bag na may ribbon pa. I practiced my opening line in the elevator.
"Hi Jho, thanks for the other day. By the way, free ka ba for dinner?"
Too casual?
"Jhoanna, I would be honored if you let me buy you steak."
Too aggressive.
Bahala na. I'll wing it.
Pumasok ako sa Meow & Brews nang may spring sa step ko. The bell chimed.
The smell of coffee welcomed me home. I scanned the counter, ready to flash my brightest, most winning smile—
And then I stopped.
My smile withered and died a tragic death.
There was someone at the counter. Not just a customer ordering drinks. No.
Someone was leaning on the counter.
Isang babae. Naka-leather jacket kahit ang init sa labas. Short hair with vibrant red streaks. Cool piercings. Basically, the definition of "bad girl vibe" that fictional characters always fall for.
And Jhoanna?
Jhoanna was laughing. Not her customer-service laugh. Not the polite chuckle she gives to regulars.
This was the full-body, head-thrown-back, slapping-the-counter laugh.
"Grabe ka talaga, Sheena!" Jhoanna wheezed, wiping a tear from her eye. "Baliw ka!"
Sheena.
Whatever. Stupid name. (Joke, sorry Sheena, whoever you are. Not really.)
Wait, hinawakan ba nung Sheena yung braso ni Jhoanna?
Did she just—yes. Yes, she did. She playfully punched Jhoanna’s arm. And Jhoanna didn’t recoil. Jhoanna leaned in closer.
Naramdaman ko yung dugo ko na umaakyat sa ulo ko.
Is this jealousy?
Am I jealous?
Yes. Jealousy crept in like heat under the skin.
Gusto kong mag-moonwalk palabas ng café. Gusto kong sunugin yung cat lamp na dala ko. Gusto kong mag-welga.
How dare someone else make her laugh like that? That is my job. (Even though I usually just make her worry or confused, but still).
Huminga ako nang malalim. Composure, Aiah. You are a professional. Do not cause a scene.
Naglakad ako palapit. My heels clicked aggressively on the floor tiles. The sound of a woman scorned (pero hindi naman naging kami, so assumera lang talaga ako).
Jhoanna spotted me. Her face lit up immediately.
"Aiah!" she called out, waving enthusiastically. "You're back! Okay ka na?"
The 'Sheena' girl turned to look at me. She looked... admittedly cool. She had that effortless swagger. She smirked at me.
"Hi," I said, voice clipped. I turned my gaze solely to Jhoanna. "I'm fine. Fully recovered. Thanks to the lugaw."
"Mabuti naman!" Jhoanna beamed. "Na-miss kita! I mean... na-miss ka namin dito. Diba, Sheena?"
She elbowed the leather jacket girl.
Sheena looked me up and down, then grinned. "Ah, ito ba yung Aiah? Yung Aiah Special?"
Aiah Special.
So pinag-uusapan nila ako?
Should I be flattered or terrified?
"Ako nga," I replied, holding my head high. "And you are?"
"Sheena," she extended a hand. "Tropang dikit ni Jhoanna since college. Best dancer ng P-Pop world sa panaginip ko."
Ah. College friend. Tropang dikit.
Historical advantage. While I was busy building skyscrapers, this Sheena was building memories with Jhoanna.
Great. Just great.
"Nice to meet you," I shook her hand briefly. Firm grip.
"Sheena, alis ka na nga, istorbo ka sa trabaho," Jhoanna jokingly pushed Sheena away from the counter. "Doon ka na, shoo!"
"Oo na, oo na! Sungit," Sheena laughed. Before she left, she leaned close to Jhoanna and whispered something loud enough for me to almost hear but not quite. Something like, "Siya ba yun? Ganda ha."
Tapos kumindat si Sheena sa akin bago naglakad palabas ng café holding her iced coffee.
naiwan kaming dalawa ni Jhoanna.
The air felt heavy. Or baka ako lang 'yun kasi bigat na bigat ako sa nararamdaman ko.
"Sorry dun kay Sheena, ang ingay 'no?" Jhoanna chuckled, fixing her apron. "Best friend ko 'yun. Minsan lang dumaan kasi busy sa dance workshops niya."
Best friend.
Okay.
Breathe, Aiah. Friend lang. Platonic. Safe.
Wait, friend lang ba talaga? Friends can turn into lovers. That’s the most common trope!
"She seems... fun," I said, trying not to sound like I wanted to ban Sheena from the premises.
"Sobra," Jhoanna nodded. Then she looked at me with those soft, brown eyes that make me want to confess all my sins. "Pero mas masaya ako na nandito ka na ulit. Namiss ko yung mukha mong seryoso habang nagtatrabaho."
Strike one to my heart.
"I... I missed being here too," I admitted.
Then I remembered the bag in my hand.
"Oh, I brought you something."
I placed the paper bag on the counter. Gently. Like I was presenting an offering to a deity.
"Hala? Ano 'to?" Jhoanna’s eyes went wide. Parang bata na nakakita ng candy. "Birthday ko ba?"
"No," I cleared my throat. "It's a... thank you gift. For bringing me food nung Saturday. Sobrang na-appreciate ko."
She opened the bag carefully. When she pulled out the cat-shaped lamp, she gasped.
"Omg! Ang cute!" She pressed the button, and the lamp glowed a soft purple. "Cat siya! Tapos nag-iiba ng kulay! Aiah, ang mahal nito for sure!"
"Hindi naman," I lied. (It was imported from Japan). "Nakita ko lang, naisip kita. Or si Siopao. Or the café."
Tumingin siya sa akin. She wasn't looking at the lamp anymore. She was looking at me.
Wait, why is she looking at me like that?
Her eyes were glistening slightly.
"Grabe ka naman, Aiah," she said softly. "Lugaw lang naman binigay ko. Sinuklian mo naman ng... ganito."
"You deserve it," I blurted out.
Katahimikan.
Did I say that too intensely?
Probably.
Jhoanna bit her lip. She put the lamp down on the counter and leaned forward, resting her chin on her hands.
"Alam mo, Aiah," she started, tone teasing but eyes observant. "Kung hindi kita kilala, iisipin ko crush mo ako eh."
SYSTEM ALERT. DEFCON 1.
ABORT MISSION. SHE KNOWS.
PANIC.
My heart stopped beating. My lungs collapsed. My brain turned into white noise.
"H-ha?" I choked out. Very eloquent, Aiah. "W-what makes you say that?"
Tumawa siya. Yung tawa na magaan. "Wala lang. Kasi lagi kang may dalang something. Tsaka... namumula ka ngayon oh."
She pointed a finger at my cheek. Not touching, just pointing.
Namumula ba ako?
Of course I am! I am standing in front of the love of my life who just accused me of having a crush on her (which is an understatement).
Think fast. Deny? Confess? Play dead?
"Mainit kasi sa labas," I reasoned weakly. "Global warming."
"Sus. Aircon naman dito," she smirked. She was enjoying this. Since when did Jhoanna become the playful one? She’s usually the flustered barista! Why have the tables turned?
"Anyway," I quickly changed the topic before I spontaneously combusted. "Are you... busy tonight?"
There. I said it. Half of the plan.
Jhoanna tilted her head. "Tonight? Hmm. Closing shift ako eh. So mga 8 PM out ko. Why?"
"Dinner?" I suggested, trying to look casual by picking at a non-existent thread on my sleeve. "My treat. To... celebrate my recovery."
"Celebrate recovery amp," she laughed again. "Pero sige. Game ako. Basta libre mo ha?"
"Always," I said, relieved.
"Pero Aiah," she added, her voice dropping a notch lower. "Seryoso ako. Thank you dito sa lamp. I love it. Ilalagay ko 'to sa tabi ng kama ko."
Sa tabi ng kama niya.
My gift will be the last thing she sees before she sleeps.
I tried not to grin like a maniac.
"I'm glad you like it," I smiled gently.
"Order ka na," she tapped the register. "Strawberry Matcha?"
I hesitated.
Do I want to drink garden soil again?
I looked at her hopeful face.
"Sure," I sighed affectionately. "Make it a large."
"Coming right up, Aiah Special!" she winked.
Naglakad ako papunta sa usual spot ko. My legs felt shaky.
Nag-agree siya sa dinner.
She teased me about having a crush on her.
She put my gift beside her bed.
Maybe... just maybe... hindi lang ako ang baliw dito?
Binuksan ko ang laptop ko. Pero bago ako mag-trabaho, nag-search muna ako sa Google:
"How to act normal on a dinner date with your crush"
"Top 10 conversation starters that aren't about architecture"
"Is 'Sheena' a threat sign language meaning"
Napatingin ako sa counter. Jhoanna was showing the lamp to another staff member, beaming with pride. "Bigay ni Aiah," I read her lips.
Yeah. I’m definitely down bad. Patay na patay.
But at least tonight, I get to take her to dinner.
Humanda ka, Jhoanna Robles. I will charm you tonight or I will die trying. (Hopefully not literally, kasi sayang ang outfit).
Naka-tatlong palit ako ng reservation.
First option was a steakhouse in Makati. Too formal. Baka ma-conscious siya.
Second option was a rooftop bar in BGC. Too windy. Baka guluhin ng hangin yung buhok niya (though she looks perfect even with messy hair, I want her to be comfortable).
Third option—and the final winner—was La Creperie in Salcedo. Cozy, warm lighting, good pasta, and excellent crepes. Not too intimidating, but romantic enough to say, “I am serious about you, please love me back.”
Sinundo ko siya sa tapat ng Meow & Brews ng 8:15 PM.
When she came out of the glass doors, the streetlights seemed to shine brighter. Or maybe that was just my vision filtering out everything that wasn’t her.
She had changed out of her uniform. Naka-beige knitted top siya na off-shoulder (Lord, give me strength), paired with simple trousers and white sneakers. She looked soft. Touchable. Like a human marshmallows.
Binuksan ko ang pinto ng passenger seat para sa kanya. Yes, I went out of the car. Chivalry is not dead; it is merely waiting for Jhoanna Robles to exist.
"Wow, may pa-open ng door," Jhoanna teased as she slid in. "Service de luxe ah."
"Only the best for the best barista," I replied, closing the door gently.
Pagpasok ko sa driver's seat, the car smelled like her immediately. Vanilla and coffee beans. Can I bottle this scent? Is that illegal?
"So, saan tayo?" she asked, putting on her seatbelt.
"Secret," I smiled, maneuvering the car into traffic. "Pero malapit lang. Gutom ka na?"
"Sobra," she rubbed her tummy. "Kinain ko lang yung reject na croissant kanina."
My heart clenched. Reject na croissant? That’s it. I’m buying her the bakery.
"Don't worry," I said, gripping the steering wheel a little tighter. "We're going to eat a lot tonight. Order whatever you want. Kahit buong menu."
Tumawa siya, yung tawa na nagpapagaan ng traffic sa EDSA. "Grabe ka talaga mag-aya, Aiah. Parang laging fiesta."
It is a fiesta whenever I’m with you, Jhoanna.
The restaurant was perfect. We got a corner table near the window. The lighting was dim and amber-hued, casting a golden glow on her skin.
Pinapanood ko siyang magbasa ng menu. She was biting her lower lip again intently.
"Suggest ka nga Aiah," she whispered, leaning closer to me. "Yung... Salpicao? Truffle?"
Nagdikit ang balikat namin. Electric shock number 453 for the week.
"Truffle is a kind of mushroom. It's earthy. Masarap," I explained, trying to keep my voice steady despite her face being three inches away from mine. "Try the Truffle Pasta. Bagay sa taste mo."
"Sige, 'yun na lang," she nodded, trusting me completely. "Ikaw, anong sa'yo?"
"Whatever you're having," I said without thinking.
She looked at me, amused. "Gaya-gaya."
"I just trust your taste," I recovered smoothly.
While waiting for our food, nagkwentuhan kami. Not the usual small talk about the weather or coffee. Real talk.
She told me about her dream of expanding the café, maybe adding a small library corner (my heart soared at this—books and coffee, our things). She told me about her family in Laguna. She told me she hates ipis but loves spiders (weird, but I accept it).
I listened intently, chin resting on my hand, memorizing every micro-expression. The way her eyes crinkle when she talks about her siblings. The way she uses her hands to emphasize a point.
I am a goner. Absolutely lost at sea.
"Ikaw, Aiah?" she asked suddenly, taking a sip of water. "Bakit Architecture?"
"I like building things," I said simply. "I like creating spaces where people can feel safe. Or happy." Like how I feel when I'm with you.
"Bagay sa'yo," she said softly. "You have that... structure. You know? Yung parang matatag ka. Yung pwedeng sandalan."
Pwedeng sandalan.
Did she just call me reliable? Or comforting?
I felt a warmth spread through my chest that had nothing to do with the room temperature.
Just as I was about to say something potentially life-changing (or embarrassing), I heard a sharp voice cut through the ambient jazz music.
"Arceta?"
Nanigas ako.
I know that voice. That’s the voice of terror. That’s the voice that criticized my thesis defense in 2019.
Dahan-dahan akong lumingon. Standing near our table was Architect Alcantara. My mentor. The strict, no-nonsense matriarch of our firm’s board.
"Ma'am Alcantara," I stood up instinctively. Professional reflex. "Good evening po."
She scanned me with her sharp eyes behind rimless glasses. "Didn't expect to see you here. Akala ko you're married to the office. I heard you're handling the Rockwell project?"
"Yes, Ma'am. Taking a break lang po," I replied politely.
Then, her gaze shifted to Jhoanna.
Jhoanna was looking up at us, holding a forkful of pasta mid-air, looking confused but polite. Even with pasta sauce potentially threatening her lip, she looked adorable.
Architect Alcantara raised an eyebrow. The eyebrow that destroys careers.
"And who is this?" she asked, her tone unreadable.
Panic started to claw at my throat.
How do I introduce her?
My favorite barista? Sounds dismissive.
My friend? Sounds like a lie.
The love of my life and future mother of my cats? Too strong.
Bago pa ako makasagot, Alcantara smirked slightly. A rare event.
"Is this your girlfriend, Arceta?"
The world stopped.
Silence. Absolute silence in my head.
Girlfriend.
The word hung in the air, sparkling and terrifying.
My brain short-circuited.
Option A: Deny. "No, Ma'am." (Risk: Hurting Jhoanna's feelings, denying my own desires).
Option B: Confirm. "Yes, Ma'am." (Risk: Jhoanna slaps me for assuming, Alcantara judges us).
"Uhm," I started, sounding like a malfunctioning printer. "She's..."
Jhoanna stood up. She wiped her mouth with a napkin gracefully and extended a hand to Alcantara.
"Hello po, Ma'am," Jhoanna said with her brightest, most charming smile—the one that sells hundreds of coffees a day. "I'm Jhoanna. Jhoanna Robles po."
She didn't confirm. She didn't deny. She just introduced herself.
Alcantara took her hand, looking surprised by Jhoanna's confidence. "Nice to meet you, Jhoanna. You have a lovely smile. Rare to see someone making Arceta here look... human."
Wait, what? Look human?
Jhoanna laughed. "Nako, Ma'am! Mabait naman po si Aiah. Medyo seryoso lang minsan, pero softie po 'yan."
Softie.
Jhoanna just called me a softie in front of the most intimidating architect in the industry.
And Alcantara... smiled?
"I see," Alcantara chuckled. "Well, I won't disturb your date. Enjoy the night. Arceta, don't overwork her."
"Yes, Ma'am. Thank you po," I managed to squeak out.
Alcantara walked away to her table.
Umupo kami ulit. I felt like I just ran a marathon. My hands were shaking slightly under the table.
Tiningnan ko si Jhoanna. She was calmly eating her pasta again.
"Okay ka lang?" she asked, noticing my pale face. "Terror professor mo 'yun?"
"Something like that," I exhaled. "She... she asked if you were my girlfriend."
I watched her reaction closely. waiting for the awkwardness. Waiting for the 'Yuck, as if!' or 'Kadiri naman si Ma'am.'
Instead, Jhoanna just shrugged, took a sip of her iced tea, and looked at me with mischievous eyes.
"Oo nga eh," she said casually. "Hindi mo naman dine-ny."
Choke.
Nabuga ko ang hangin sa lungs ko.
"I—I panicked!" I defended myself, pitch higher than normal. "I didn't want to be rude! And I didn't want to assume... I mean..."
"Sus," she teased, leaning forward again. "Okay lang naman sa akin mapagkamalan. Ikaw ba? Okay lang sa'yo?"
Okay lang sa akin?
It would be the greatest honor of my existence. It would be my greatest achievement, surpassing any building I could ever design.
"I wouldn't mind," I whispered, my voice dropping to a serious, almost desperate tone. I looked straight into her eyes. "I wouldn't mind at all, Jho."
The teasing smile on Jhoanna's face faltered slightly. She saw the intensity in my eyes. She saw the truth I was failing to hide.
A blush crept up her neck. For the first time tonight, she looked shy.
"Ewan ko sa'yo, Aiah," she mumbled, looking down at her plate, pushing a mushroom around with her fork. "Kumain ka na nga lang dyan. Lumalamig yung food mo."
But I saw it.
I saw the way she tucked her hair behind her ear.
I saw the small, suppressed smile playing on her lips.
Did she... did she like the idea too?
Tinuloy namin ang pagkain. The atmosphere shifted. It wasn't just friendly anymore. There was a tension—a sweet, thick tension. Every time our hands brushed while reaching for the water pitcher, may kuryente. Every time our eyes met, parang may unspoken conversation.
Are we doing this? Are we falling?
After dinner, hinatid ko siya pauwi. Not to the café, but to her house (she gave me the address via Waze, and yes, I saved it as 'Home' in my head before correcting it to 'Jhoanna's Place').
Pag-park ko sa tapat ng gate nila, pinatay ko ang makina.
"Thank you, Aiah," she said softly inside the quiet car. "Busog na busog ako. And... I had fun."
"Me too," I said. "I always have fun with you."
She unbuckled her seatbelt but didn't open the door immediately. She turned to me.
"Yung sinabi ni Ma'am Alcantara kanina," she started, biting her lip again.
My heart hammered against my ribs. "Yes?"
"Sabi niya... I make you look human," Jhoanna chuckled softly. "Mukha ka bang robot sa office?"
I laughed, relieved it wasn't a rejection. "Apparently. I'm usually... cold. Strict. Focused."
"Hmm," she hummed, reaching out. Her hand—her warm, barista-scarred hand—touched my cheek.
Brain freeze.
System failure.
All systems down.
She patted my cheek gently. "Hindi ka naman robot eh. You're just... Aiah. And I like this Aiah."
She withdrew her hand quickly, as if realizing what she did.
"Sige na! Pasok na ako! Goodnight!" she scrambled out of the car fast.
"Goodnight, Jho," I whispered to the empty air, touching the spot on my cheek where her hand had been.
I watched her enter her gate. She waved once before disappearing inside.
Sumandal ako sa headrest ng driver's seat.
Hinawakan ko ang dibdib ko. Ang bilis ng tibok.
"Patay," I muttered to the darkness of the car. "Patay na patay na talaga."
I grabbed my phone and messaged her immediately.
Me: Got home safe?
(Kahit nasa tapat pa ako ng bahay niya).
Jhoanna Robles: Nasa labas ka pa eh! Umuwi ka na! Drive safe, 'Girlfriend' kuno. :P
I stared at the screen. 'Girlfriend' kuno. With a tongue-out emoji.
I started the engine, screaming internally.
I am going to marry this woman. I don't care how many matcha lattes I have to drink. I will make it happen.
Nakatayo ako sa aisle 4 ng Landers ng 5:30 PM.
My dilemma: Is buying three boxes of Gatorade (Blue Bolt flavor, kasi favorite niya daw blue), five boxes of Krispy Kreme (assorted, pero mostly original glaze kasi baka ayaw nila ng matamis masyado), and a cooler full of mineral water considered too much for a simple dance practice visit?
"Miss, pang-fiesta po ba?" tanong ng staff na nag-a-assist sa akin mag-load ng cart.
"No," I replied, adjusting my sunglasses even though nasa indoors kami. "It's for... hydration."
Hydration. Right.
Kasi mamaya, manonood ako ng practice ng dance group nila Jhoanna.
Jhoanna invited me casually via text: “Nood ka practice namin later? If free ka lang naman! :)”
If free ka lang naman.
Jhoanna, I would cancel a meeting with the President of the Philippines to watch you breathe. Syempre free ako. I cleared my schedule faster than you can say "espresso shot."
Binayaran ko ang lahat. The bill was astronomical for "snacks," pero wala akong pakialam. Kung pwede ko lang bilhin yung aircon ng studio para siguraduhing hindi siya naiinitan, ginawa ko na.
Nag-drive ako papunta sa studio sa QC. My car looked like a catering service vehicle.
Pagdating ko sa location—isang lumang building na puro mirrors ang walls sa second floor—rinig ko na ang bass ng tugtog mula sa baba.
Umakyat ako, struggling slightly with the boxes of donuts while the hired help (yes, nagpasama ako sa driver ng family namin para lang magbuhat ng Gatorade) carried the heavy stuff.
Binuksan ko ang pinto.
The smell of sweat and humidity hit me instantly. Pero hindi ako nandidiri. Because standing there, center stage, wearing loose jogging pants and a cropped top that exposed her midriff, was Jhoanna.
And she was body rolling.
Nabitiwan ko muntik yung donut.
Lord. Mary. Joseph.
She was focused. Her eyes were sharp, staring at herself in the mirror. Her movements were snappy, powerful. Ibang-iba sa clumsy, bubbly barista na kilala ko. This Jhoanna was fierce. This Jhoanna commanded attention.
The sweat glistening on her neck? Art.
The way her hair stuck to her forehead? Masterpiece.
The little smirk she did when she hit the beat perfectly? Cause of death: Jhoanna Robles.
Natapos ang kanta. Humingal silang lahat.
Then Sheena (the girl from the café) spotted me.
"Uy! Andito na ang sponsor!" Sheena yelled, pointing at me.
Napatingin si Jhoanna. Her fierce expression instantly melted into that goofy, sunshine smile I love.
"Aiah!" She jogged towards me, wiping her face with the back of her hand. "Hala, andito ka nga! Akala ko joke lang!"
"I said I'd come," I smiled, putting the donuts down on a bench. "And... I brought refreshments."
She looked at the mountain of Gatorade and donuts behind me. Her jaw dropped.
"Aiah..." she laughed, hitting my arm lightly. "Practice lang 'to, hindi feeding program! Grabe ka naman!"
"Gusto ko lang sure na hydrated kayo," I defended myself weakly. "And hungry people can't dance."
"Guys! May pa-Gatorade si Madam Aiah!" sigaw ni Sheena.
Agad nagtakbuhan yung ibang members—may narinig akong Colet, Maloi, Gwen—palapit sa pagkain. Nag-thank you sila sa akin in chorus parang mga bata.
"Salamat po, Miss Aiah!" sabi nung maliit na maingay (Maloi ata). "Ang bango niyo po! Amoy yayamanin!"
I just nodded politely. My attention was solely on Jhoanna.
She was breathing heavily, her chest rising and falling. Gusto kong punasan yung pawis niya. Gusto kong ibalot siya sa towel.
"Pagod ka?" I asked softly, handing her a bottle of water I personally opened.
"Sobra," she drank greedily. Watching her throat move as she swallowed was an experience I didn't know I needed. "Ang hirap nung choreo sa chorus eh. Laging mali pasok ko."
"You looked perfect to me," I said immediately. Too fast. Too honest.
She lowered the bottle and looked at me. "Bolera. Nakita kitang dumating nung patapos na eh."
"Even the last 10 seconds were perfect," I insisted. "Ang galing mo gumalaw, Jho. I mean it."
Namula siya. Or baka flushed lang siya dahil sa exercise? Whatever it is, she looked breathtaking.
"Break muna kami ng 15 minutes," sabi niya. "Doon tayo sa labas? Ang init dito eh."
Tumango ako. Sinundan ko siya sa balcony ng studio.
The air outside was cooler. Sumandal si Jhoanna sa railing, looking out at the city lights. I stood beside her, maintaining a respectful distance (kahit gusto kong yumakap).
"Thank you sa pagpunta ha," she started, voice quieter now. "Nahihiya nga ako eh. Ang dugyot ko tignan."
"Dugyot?" I frowned genuinely. "Jho, you look... incredible. You look passionate."
She chuckled humorlessly, looking down at her worn-out rubber shoes. "Passionate... pero hanggang dito lang naman. Hobby lang. Unlike you... you build skyscrapers, Aiah. You have a career. Ako... taga-timpla ng kape tapos sumasayaw sa gabi para feeling idol."
Napatahimik ako.
Is that how she sees herself?
Does she not realize she is the brightest thing in any room she enters? That her coffee makes people's mornings bearable? That her dancing made my heart race faster than any architectural deadline?
Humarap ako sa kanya. I took a step closer, invading her personal space intentionally this time.
"Jhoanna," I said firmly.
Nag-angat siya ng tingin. Her eyes were vulnerable, insecure.
"Don't ever belittle what you do," I told her, my voice shaking slightly with the intensity of my emotions. "You run a business. You create a community. And watching you dance earlier? That wasn't just a 'hobby'. You have a presence, Jho. You light up the stage. Or the studio. Or wherever you are."
I took a deep breath. Sige na, Aiah. Sabihin mo na.
"And for the record," I continued, staring straight into her soul. "I don't care about skyscrapers. I would trade every building I've designed just to watch you be happy doing what you love. You are... you are so much more than you give yourself credit for."
Natulala siya sa akin.
The wind blew past us, carrying strands of her hair across her face.
Neither of us moved.
"Aiah..." she whispered.
She looked at me like she was seeing me for the first time. Not as a customer, not as a rich friend, but as me. As someone who sees her.
She reached out and held the hem of my expensive blazer.
"Bakit ka ganyan?" she asked, tears forming in the corners of her eyes. "Bakit sobrang bait mo sa akin? Bakit... bakit parang sobra-sobra yung binibigay mo?"
Kasi mahal kita.
Kasi ikaw ang pahinga ko.
Kasi ikaw lang.
"Because you deserve to be seen," I said instead. "And I want to be the one who sees you."
A tear escaped her eye. Before she could wipe it, my hand moved on its own.
Hinawakan ko ang pisngi niya. My thumb brushed away the tear. Her skin was damp with sweat, but I didn't care.
"Wag ka nang umiyak," I whispered. "Sayang ang ganda."
She leaned into my touch. She actually leaned into my hand. She closed her eyes for a second, savoring the moment.
My heart was doing gymnastics. Triple backflips.
This is it. Moment na ba 'to? Should I kiss her? Or is that too much? Pawis siya, baka ayaw niya.
Biglang bumukas ang pinto ng balcony.
"Huy Jho! Tama na drama, practice na ulit!" sigaw ni Sheena.
Napatalon kaming dalawa palayo sa isa't isa.
I withdrew my hand as if I was burned. Jhoanna pretended to fix her ponytail frantically.
"O-oo! Papasok na!" Jhoanna shouted back, voice cracking.
Sheena looked at us, smirked knowingly, and went back inside.
Naiwan kaming awkward.
"So..." Jhoanna laughed nervously, rubbing her nape. "Pasok na ako? Sayang Gatorade kung di ako papawisan ulit."
"Yeah. Go," I smiled, though disappointed na naputol ang moment. "Galingan mo. I'll be watching."
"Aiah," she called out bago siya pumasok.
"Yes?"
"Thank you," she smiled. A genuine, soft, vulnerable smile. "Sa lahat. Sa Gatorade. Sa words. Sa... pagpunas ng luha."
Then she ran back inside.
Naiwan akong nakatayo sa balcony.
Kinuha ko ang phone ko.
I need to vent. I opened my notes app again.
Entry #55:
CONFIRMED: I am willing to be her water girl, her driver, her sponsor, her emotional support human.
She leaned into my hand.
I touched her face.
Note to self: Buy shares in Gatorade.
Pumasok ako sa loob para manood ulit.
Umupo ako sa sahig kasama ng mga bag nila. I watched her dance for another hour.
Every time she caught my eye in the mirror, she smiled.
And every time she smiled, I mentally planned our wedding.
Wait, masyado bang mabilis?
Whatever. Sa imagination ko, may dalawa na kaming pusa.
Pagkatapos ng practice, hinatid ko siya ulit pauwi. But this time, it was different.
Quiet confidence.
When she got out of the car, she hesitated.
"Aiah," she said through the open window. "Sa Sunday... free ka ba?"
"Always," I answered instantly.
"Birthday kasi ni Stacey. Swimming sa Laguna. Kasama buong tropa," she fidgeted. "Gusto sana kitang isama. As my... plus one?"
Plus one.
Not friend. Plus one.
That implies pairing. That implies togetherness.
"I'd love to go," I said, trying to keep my voice even.
"Sige! Send ko details," she beamed. "Goodnight, Aiah! Ingat pag-uwi!"
Nag-drive ako pauwi na parang nasa ulap.
Swimming. Laguna. Plus one.
Wait.
Swimming means swimwear.
Jhoanna in swimwear.
Bigla akong napa-preno sa red light.
Need ko mag-gym. Need ko mag-prepare mentally. Need ko ng oxygen tank.
Lord, kung pagsubok ito, pakibigay na lahat. Handa na ako.
Laguna. Province of hot springs, buko pie, and apparently, my imminent death by cardiac arrest.
Nakarating kami sa private resort na nirentahan nila Stacey (well, technically ako nag-bayad ng remaining balance nung nalaman kong kulang sila sa budget, but I told Stacey to tell everyone it was a "promo discount").
The moment we stepped out of my car, chaos ensued.
"Ayan na ang royal couple!" sigaw ni Sheena na nakasampa sa likod ni Gwen.
"Jho! Aiah! Buti nakarating kayo!" Stacey, the birthday girl, rushed towards us wearing a bright pink sash that said 'It Girl ng Laguna'. She hugged Jhoanna, then hesitated before hugging me. "Miss Aiah, thank you sa lechon ha! Grabe, may pa-lechon si Mayor!"
"It's nothing," I smiled, adjusting my sun hat. "Happy Birthday, Stacey."
"Grabe, Jho," bulong ni Maloi na sumulpot sa gilid ko. "Daig niyo pa mag jowa 'no? Or baka naman sugar mommy mo? Pwede ba mag-apply na ampon?"
"Huy! Tumigil nga kayo," Jhoanna swatted Maloi's arm, but her ears were red. She looked at me apologetically. "Pasensya ka na sa kanila, Aiah. Hindi sila nakainom ng gamot."
"I like them," I said truthfully. Any friend of Jhoanna is a friend of mine. If Jhoanna loves a rock, I will build a shrine for that rock.
We settled into the villa. It was nice—pool view, karaoke machine (nako po), and an open kitchen.
Habang nag-aayos sila ng gamit, I took the liberty of arranging the food I brought. Lechon, three bilao of sushi, pizza, and crates of beer.
"Aiah," Jhoanna approached me in the kitchen. She was wearing oversized shorts and a shirt. "Umupo ka na nga lang. Bisita ka eh. Ako na dyan."
"I want to help," I insisted, slicing lemons for the tequila later.
"Ang kulit," she chuckled, bumping her hip against mine.
Bumping. Her. Hip. Against. Mine.
Friendly gesture? Yes.
Did I almost slice my finger off? Also yes.
"Magbihis na tayo for swimming!" sigaw ni Colet from the second floor.
My breath hitched.
This is it. The moment of truth.
Pumasok ako sa CR to change. I chose a conservative but flattering one-piece swimsuit. Black. Classic. Safe. I put on a sheer cover-up because I am a shy architectural blooming flower.
Paglabas ko, nasa poolside na silang lahat. Nagkakagulo. Tumatalon sa pool.
I scanned the area for Jhoanna.
And then I saw her.
Time slowed down. The background noise of splashing water and karaoke faded into a dull hum.
Jhoanna was standing by the edge of the pool. She was wearing a two-piece bikini. Pastel blue.
Blue. My favorite color.
It wasn't scandalous. It was cute. But seeing Jhoanna Robles—my barista, my crush, the love of my life—showing skin? Seeing the curve of her waist? The mole on her shoulder? Her legs?
I felt my soul leave my body.
I immediately grabbed my sunglasses and put them on. Need ko itago ang mata ko. Baka lumuwa.
Kumuha ako ng baso ng tubig at ininom 'yun ng mabilisan.
Stay calm, Aiah. Don't look like a pervert. Don't look like a starving Victorian man seeing an ankle for the first time.
"Aiah!" Jhoanna waved at me. She started walking towards me.
Every step she took felt like a drumbeat in my chest.
As she got closer, I noticed droplets of water on her skin. She must have dipped already.
"Init 'no?" she smiled, unaware that she is the hottest thing in the vicinity. "Hindi ka pa magsi-swim?"
"Later," I croaked. Voice check. "Later. Just... resting."
"Okay," she nodded. Then she turned around, presenting her back to me. She held up a bottle of sunscreen. "Pwede pa-lagay sa likod? Hindi ko maabot eh. Busy sila Sheena, nagtutulakan sa pool."
Lagay. Sunscreen. Sa. Likod.
This is a test. Lord, kung nanonood kayo, please guide my hands.
"S-sure," I stammered.
Kinuha ko ang bottle. I squeezed a generous amount onto my palm. My hands were trembling slightly.
"Ready?"
"Go lang," she said, tieing her hair up, exposing her nape.
Her nape. Weakness #1.
I placed my hand on her shoulder blade.
Warm. Soft. Smooth.
I started spreading the lotion in slow, circular motions.
"Mmm, lamig," Jhoanna hummed.
I swear, that sound rewired my brain chemistry.
Concentrate, Aiah. Spread the lotion evenly. Do not linger. Do not trace her spine. Do not think about hugging her from behind.
I moved my hand down to her lower back.
"Dito rin?" I asked, voice barely a whisper.
"Oo, dyan banda. Thanks, Aiah."
I felt her muscles relax under my touch. Whatever stress she had from the café, I wanted to massage it away. I wanted to protect this back from the sun, from the world, from everything.
"Tapos na," I said abruptly, pulling my hand away before I did something reckless like kiss her shoulder.
Humarap siya sa akin. "Thank you! Ang gentle mo naman mag-lagay."
She grabbed my hand—the one with lotion residue—and held it.
"Ikaw? May sunscreen ka na?"
"Meron na," I lied. I forgot. I don't care if I burn. I am already burning up inside.
"Sure ka? Halika, lagyan kita sa mukha," she squeezed some lotion on her fingers and stepped into my personal space.
She dabbed sunscreen on my nose, my cheeks, my forehead. She was so close I could count her eyelashes. Her eyes were focused on my face, lips slightly parted in concentration.
"Ayan," she whispered, smoothing out the cream on my cheek. "Protected na ang favorite architect ko."
I stopped breathing. Literally. My lungs went on strike.
"Hoy! Ang lalandi niyo!" sigaw ni Mikha mula sa pool. "Respeto naman sa mga single!"
Jhoanna laughed and pulled away, dragging me towards the water. "Tara na nga! Ligo na tayo!"
We spent the afternoon in the pool. I mostly stayed in the shallow end, holding onto the edge, while Jhoanna rode on Colet’s back for a chicken fight against Maloi and Sheena.
Pinapanood ko lang siya tumawa. Every time she got splashed, she’d wipe her eyes and laugh harder. She looked so carefree. So happy.
And I realized, I would bankrupt myself buying lechon and renting villas just to keep her smiling like this.
Evening. 9:00 PM.
Naka-banig kami sa garden. The stars were out.
Bottles of beer and soju were scattered in the middle. Ubos na ang lechon.
Everyone was slightly tipsy. Including me. Jhoanna was sitting beside me, her knee pressing against my thigh.
"Truth or Dare tayo!" Sheena announced, holding an empty soju bottle.
"Nako, lagot," Gwen muttered.
They spun the bottle. First victim: Stacey.
Dare: I-chat ang ex. (Chaos ensued).
Second victim: Colet.
Truth: Sino favorite niya circle of friends nila? (Answer: Maloi, kahit aso't pusa sila).
Then, Sheena spun the bottle again.
It spun.
And spun.
And landed on me.
"Ayan!" Sheena clapped wickedly. "Miss Aiah! Truth or Dare?"
"Truth," I said confidently. I am a dignified woman. I will not do silly dares.
Sheena smirked. The kind of smirk that tells you she knows everything.
"Miss Aiah... straight to the point na tayo."
She pointed the bottle at Jhoanna, then back at me.
"Anong meron sa inyo ni Jhoanna? Kasi girl, yung tingin mo sa kanya kanina habang naglalagay ng sunscreen? Pang-teleserye. So, ano? Kayo na ba? Or hinihintay mo lang siya?"
Silence.
Everyone looked at me.
Jhoanna stiffened beside me. She didn't look at me. She was picking at the grass.
The alcohol gave me a boost of courage. Or maybe it was stupidity.
"Hindi kami," I said clearly.
I felt Jhoanna relax—or was it disappointment?
"Pero," I continued, looking straight at Sheena, then turning my head to look at Jhoanna's side profile. "I am waiting. patiently. And I intend to wait until she's ready."
Everyone gasped. "Ooooooh!"
"Sana all!"
"Grabe ang linyahan!"
Jhoanna slowly turned to look at me. Her eyes were wide, reflecting the moonlight. She looked shocked.
"Aiah..." she whispered.
"Wait, wait! Hindi pa tapos!" Sheena interrupted, drunk on power. "Spin ulit!"
She spun the bottle.
It landed on Jhoanna.
"Hah! Destiny!" Sheena shouted. "Jhoanna! Truth or Dare?"
"Truth," Jhoanna said, her voice shaky. She hasn't broken eye contact with me since my answer.
Sheena leaned forward. "Jhoanna Robles. Narinig mo naman sinabi ni Aiah. Ang tanong ko sa'yo... Mahal mo ba?"
The world stopped spinning.
I held my breath. My heart was pounding so hard I felt it in my throat.
Jhoanna looked at me. Really looked at me. She searched my eyes, looking for any sign of hesitation. She found none. All she found was me, Aiah Arceta, completely and utterly hers.
A slow smile spread across Jhoanna's lips. Her eyes softened, becoming fond and tender.
"Sheena," Jhoanna started, never looking away from me. "Paano ko hindi mamahalin 'yan? Eh siya lang naman ang tyatyaga uminom ng Matcha ko kahit alam kong ayaw niya ng lasa."
My eyes widened.
She knew.
She knew I hated the Matcha. And she knew I drank it anyway.
"Siya lang yung nagdadala ng pusa na lamp kahit walang occasion," Jhoanna continued, her hand slowly finding mine on the banig and intertwining our fingers. "Siya lang yung tumitingin sa akin na parang ako pinaka-magandang tao sa mundo kahit pawis na pawis ako."
She squeezed my hand tight.
"So to answer your question, Sheena..." Jhoanna took a deep breath. "Oo. Mahal ko. Sobra."
The group erupted into cheers.
"Wooooooh!"
"Sabi na eh!"
"Kasal na yan!"
But I didn't hear them.
All I heard was Oo. Mahal ko. Sobra.
I felt tears prick my eyes. I am a cool, collected architect, but right now, I am a puddle of emotions.
"You knew about the matcha?" I whispered to Jhoanna amidst the noise.
She laughed, squeezing my hand again. "Oo naman. Ang pangit kaya ng mukha mo pag lumulunok. Halatang pilit. Pero iniinom mo pa rin. Doon pa lang... alam ko na."
"So... tayo na?" I asked, needing clarification. Needing to label this overflowing happiness.
Jhoanna grinned—that blinding, beautiful smile.
"Ligawan mo muna ako nang maayos. Yung walang surprise lechon. Yung tayo lang."
"Challenge accepted," I beamed. "I'll court you everyday if I have to."
"Good," she leaned in and kissed my cheek. Just a quick peck, but it burned like fire. "Kasi gusto ko ring kiligin araw-araw, Aiah."
Napahawak ako sa pisngi ko.
Confirmed.
I am dead.
Cause of death: Jhoanna Robles’ lips.
The night went on with more drinking and teasing, but I stayed right there, holding her hand, thinking about how I am the luckiest person in Laguna, in the Philippines, in the universe.
Baliw na baliw?
Patay na patay?
Understatement of the century.
I am hers. Completely.
Courtship, technically speaking, is a series of strategic maneuvers designed to win affection. In the animal kingdom, birds do mating dances. Peacocks show off their feathers.
Ako? I became a glorified GrabDriver and personal barricade against inconveniences.
It’s been two weeks since the Laguna confession. Two weeks of "proper ligaw." And by proper, Jhoanna meant “Aiah, stop buying the whole menu, just sit there and talk to me.”
So, I adjusted.
No more fake matcha drinking. Thank God.
Ngayon, pagpasok ko ng Meow & Brews, automatic na nilalapag ni Jhoanna ang Iced Americano sa counter.
"Para sa architect na hindi na nagpapanggap," she’d tease, sliding the cup towards me with that playful glint in her eyes.
"I did it for love," I’d defend myself, taking a sip of the glorious, bitter coffee. "Whatever helps your sales, Jho."
"Sus. Sales daw. Gusto mo lang makitang masaya ako," she’d counter, leaning over the counter, chin in hand.
"Isn't that the same thing?" I’d reply, dead serious.
She would blush, hit my arm lightly, and go back to work. Routine na namin 'yun. And I live for it.
Tonight was different, though.
The sky over Manila was angry. Kumukulog nang malakas at bumubuhos ang ulan na parang may bagyo, kahit wala naman sa forecast.
It was 9:00 PM. Closing time.
Naka-park ako sa tapat ng café, hazard lights blinking. I was waiting for her. Usually, sabay kaming lumalabas, but she insisted on doing inventory alone tonight because one of her staff had an emergency.
I stared at the glass door of the café.
Inside, Jhoanna was wiping tables. Even from here, I could see she was humming. She moved with a rhythm only she could hear.
Lord, paano ba kumalma? Every time I see her, feeling ko first time ulit. My heart rate hasn't gone below 100 bpm in two weeks. This is medically concerning, but emotionally fulfilling.
Bumukas ang pinto ng café.
Jhoanna stepped out, locking the door behind her. She was struggling with her umbrella because the wind was too strong.
Agad akong lumabas ng kotse.
Forget the rain. Forget my expensive leather loafers getting soaked.
I opened my giant, wind-proof golf umbrella (binili ko specifically for moments like this) and ran towards her.
"Jho!"
Napatingin siya. Basang-basa na ang sapatos niya.
"Aiah! Huy, bakit ka bumaba? Mababasa ka!"
I reached her and immediately shielded her with my umbrella, tilting it so she was fully covered, leaving my left shoulder exposed to the downpour.
"Ayos lang," I said, catching my breath. "The wind is strong. Baka liparin ka. Ang payat mo pa naman."
"Grabe sa payat!" she laughed, shivering slightly.
"Nilalamig ka?"
Before she could answer, hinubad ko ang blazer ko. Yes, cliche. Yes, parang eksena sa pelikula. But instinct took over. I draped it over her shoulders.
"Aiah, yung shirt mo nipis lang! Magkakasakit ka niyan!" she protested, trying to give it back.
"No," I held the blazer in place on her shoulders. "I have high immunity. Vitamin C everyday. Wear it."
She looked at me. Standing there in the middle of the rain, under the orange glow of the streetlamp, surrounded by the sound of rushing water.
Her hair was slightly damp. Her nose was pink from the cold. She was wearing my oversized blazer that smelled like my perfume.
She looked perfect.
"Bakit ba ganyan ka?" she asked softly, her voice barely audible over the rain.
"Ganyang ano?"
"Ganyan ka mag-alaga," she stepped closer. The umbrella created a small, intimate world for just the two of us. "Sobrang... sobra. You treat me like I’m delicate. Like I’m precious."
I looked into her deep brown eyes.
Raindrops fell from the edge of the umbrella, framing us.
"Because you are precious, Jho," I said, voice steady despite the chaos in my chest. "Wait, no. That's an understatement."
Huminga ako nang malalim. This is it. No more architect jargon. No more avoiding.
"Jhoanna, before I met you, my life was just... lines. Plans. Structures. Black and white. Efficient, pero boring," I confessed, disregarding the fact that half my body was now soaked. "Then you gave me that stupid matcha. You smiled at me. And suddenly... my world had color. Specifically, blue. And pink. And whatever color your eyes are when they catch the light."
She stared at me, lips parted.
"I don't just want to court you," I continued, desperate to make her understand the magnitude of my feelings. "I want to be the person who holds the umbrella for you. I want to be the one who drinks your experimental coffees. I want to drive you home every day until I'm eighty. I am... I am so in love with you, it's actually terrifying."
Silence.
Only the sound of rain.
Then, Jhoanna smiled.
Not her customer service smile. Not her teasing smile.
It was a smile full of love, relief, and certainty.
She reached up, her hands finding the lapels of my wet shirt. She pulled me down gently.
"Ang daldal mo, Aiah," she whispered.
And then she kissed me.
It wasn't like in the movies with fireworks. It was better.
It tasted like coffee and rain. It felt warm and soft and real.
My brain flatlined. My soul ascended.
I forgot how to hold the umbrella (but my hand stayed firm because muscle memory—must protect Jhoanna).
I kissed her back, pouring every ounce of adoration I had into it. My free hand found her waist, pulling her closer, eliminating any space between us.
When we pulled apart, we were both breathless. Her forehead rested against mine.
"So..." she whispered, eyes closed. "Sinasagot na kita. Bago pa tayo magka-pneumonia dito."
My eyes snapped open. "Really?"
She opened her eyes and giggled. "Ayaw mo ba? Sige, bawiin ko—"
"No!" I exclaimed quickly. "No take backs! Mine. You're mine now. Official. Noted. Sealed."
Tumawa siya nang malakas, yung tawang favorite sound ko na. "Opo, Architect. Sa'yo na po ako."
Sa'yo na po ako.
Words that I will engrave on my tombstone. Words that I will frame in my office.
"Tara na sa kotse," she said, tugging my shirt. "Basang-basa ka na oh. Kawawa naman ang girlfriend ko."
Girlfriend.
Looking at me. Referring to me.
Sinundan ko siya papunta sa kotse, holding the umbrella like it was the Excalibur.
Pinagbuksan ko siya ng pinto. Once she was safe inside, umikot ako papunta sa driver's seat.
Pagpasok ko, basang-basa ako. My shirt was sticking to my skin. My shoes were squishing.
But I have never felt warmer.
Jhoanna was sitting there, wrapped in my blazer, looking at me with pure affection. She reached over to the backseat to grab a tissue box and started wiping my face.
"Baliw ka talaga," she murmured fondly, drying my cheeks. "Pero mahal kita."
I caught her hand and kissed her palm.
"Mahal din kita, Jho. Sobra."
I started the car engine. The radio played a soft jazz tune.
Nag-drive ako pauwi. One hand on the steering wheel, the other holding her hand tight on the center console.
I glanced at her. Nakatingin siya sa labas ng bintana, humming softly, thumb rubbing against my knuckles.
I thought about the future.
More coffee runs. More dance practices. More bookstore dates. Meeting her family in Laguna properly. Maybe designing a house for us one day—one with a big kitchen for her and a library for me.
I am Aiah Arceta. Architect. Professional.
And now, officially, Jhoanna Robles’ girlfriend.
Whatever happens, as long as I have her hand in mine, I know I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be.
Baliw na baliw? Check.
Patay na patay? Check.
Happiest person alive?
Absolutely.
"Jho," I called out softly as we stopped at a red light.
"Hmm?" she turned to me.
"Next time... try natin yung coffee na may chocolate?" I suggested. "Para mocha?"
She laughed, shaking her head. "Titingnan ko. Baka ampalaya shake naman next time, testing lang kung gaano mo ako ka-mahal."
I smiled, staring at her lips.
"Bring it on. I'll drink the whole pitcher."
And the terrifying part is... I really would.
The End.