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Language:
English
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Published:
2026-01-01
Updated:
2026-02-17
Words:
19,029
Chapters:
4/24
Comments:
8
Kudos:
3
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79

The Inexplicable Habit

Summary:

J'zargo and Marcurio do not like each other very much.

However, bound together by mutual affection for a starry-eyed Dragonborn-to-be, they find it within themselves to put this aside. The College of Winterhold is big enough for the two of them, after all. But of course, since every good story starts with something going terribly wrong, things fall apart when the Dragonborn disappears mysteriously into a snowstorm without so much as a word.

With nothing else better to do, these two sorry excuses for mages embark on an epic quest of terrible misfortune, dramatic irony, and a slow burn bromance that might just lose that B in another hundred thousand words. Who's to say! Whether predetermined by the hands of fate, or by the dice roll of some wine-drunk Daedra, the life of the Dragonborn hangs in the balance and now all that's left to save her are two idiots and their funny, inexplicable habit of always somehow making it just in time.

Chapter 1: Preface

Chapter Text

Hello!

I understand that no one actually likes to read the preface, but please stay with me for a moment, I’ll try my best to keep it brief.

This fic is unedited. Entirely.

I, at this moment in time, have actually been dubbed by nine out of ten dentists as the world’s slowest writer— an accomplishment that would be cool if it wasn’t such a drag on my creative projects. This affliction of mine most debilitatingly affects this fic that you’ve opened: “The Inexplicable Habit.” 

I have been writing this fic. For. Years. I believe 2026 marks three years since its conception, and as it stands I’ve written only a chapter and a half. Fuck my chungus life. However! I have set myself a goal for 2026! Rejoice! 2026 will be the year I finish my draft of this fic from chapter one through twenty-three. And this, my friend, is that draft.

I have written a detailed plan of every event of this story, so never fear the eternal plague that is the disappearing author. I promise I shan’t hit a writer’s block and leave this story adrift fifteen chapters deep. It’s a matter of when I shall finish, not if. Even if you may be waiting a while.

So, then, why am I posting an unedited first draft? If I have every intention of finishing it properly, why put it into the world if it sucks instead of waiting? 

Well. Alright. Partly, it’s that I am first and foremost writing this fic because it’s the story I found was absent from the world— you mean to tell me all that Skyrim fanfiction and no one has ever thought of how obvious a Marcurio & J’zargo fic should be?— and I think if I was a reader, I wouldn’t give a single shit how unedited a fic was so long as I got to read about these two. But further, I also like the feeling of accomplishing things. I want to post my work so I can see that delicious word count go up, see the numbers tick, that sweet sweet validation. I need to feel like there’s a responsibility to finish, like I have to work on it, because there are eyes on me, you know? And also, finally, maybe someone out there will read it and comment. I write fics for myself, but having someone out there tell you that you’re doing it for people warms my heart. So if you’ve cared enough to read this far, and god forbid you continue to do so for the rest of my story, know that you’re amazing and I love you and don’t feel afraid to comment, even if it’s just a couple words. Truly genuinely a single comment can make an author’s day.

So. TLDR, some of the sentences will be bad. The pacing will be strange. But it will be out there, and that’s all that matters. If you’re kind enough to stay with me on this journey, you’re incredible, and when I finish and post the edited version you will get to say “real ones know you changed that detail.” Also, feel free to criticise or suggest anything! This is a draft, consider yourselves my beta audience. 

I love you, reader. Thank you for being here. Manifest a productive year for me (between my final year of high school and everything else going on in my stupid life)

Sincerely, 

Guardian :P