Chapter Text
“So how’s life in the Big Apple?”
”It’s great. I have lunch with Jonathan every Saturday. NYU is even better than I thought it would be. I can really be myself there you know?”
”Yeah…”
”I tried out a new form of art with charcoal, you know? Carl said it looked cool but I think it just looked like space, if space had no stars… The professors really believe in me and—“
”Who’s Carl?”
”Oh right you don’t know!” Will laughed, “he’s my boyfriend. I met him at the bar. Turned out he goes to NYU too, and we’ve been together ever since. He shows me his stories and I show him my drawings, even the awful ones. How about you? How are you doing? Anything new in your life?”
”What do you think? Look around you.”
Will looked. The basement was as he always remembered it. Posters on the wall, the sofa that they were sitting on the same one that they’d sat on years prior, when Mike had promised that they’d ‘go crazy together’. The desk was the only thing different to what Will remembered. It was covered in scrunched up pieces of paper, and a typewriter stood pushed to the back, like Mike had not used it for a while.
”You’ve stopped writing?”
”I don’t…” a tear fell. Will’s smile disappeared completely.
”I don’t see the point anymore.”
Will rested his hand on Mike’s arm.
”Hey. Hey Mike, it’s okay. It’s okay not to be okay.”
”Easy for you to say. You’re the one living out your dream, accepted for who you are, making out with some guy at bars, giving him your drawings, reading his stories.”
Mike stood up, and turned away abruptly. His chest shook.
”Mike—“
”Just leave me alone Will.”
”You’ll—you’ll find the right girl one day.”
”The right girl?!” Mike turned back to face him. “Will, this is not about girls.”
”Then what’s it about?”
”Carl.” Said Mike, coldly.
”Carl.” Repeated Will, bemused.
”Yes Carl, your idiot boyfriend.”
”He’s not an idiot!”
Mike crossed his arms, and turned his face away to hide his tears.
”Mike, what is it?”
”Carl. He doesn’t know you. Not like I do. And he doesn’t keep your drawings in a folder under his bed. He doesn’t hold your D&D folder in his hands like it’s goddamn gold. He doesn’t know how you once drew a whole load of tunnels and covered the walls of your house in them. He doesn’t know why the back of your neck is such a sensitive spot for you. You probably have to lie to him every time he touches your neck while he’s shoving his tongue down your throat, the same throat that had that damn vine shoved all the way down it.”
”Mike—“
”He doesn’t know you the way I do. He doesn’t love you the way I do.”
“Mike…”
Mike grabbed Will’s cheeks. “Will. Will. Shit.”
”Mike…”
”After… after losing El I couldn’t— I couldn’t just move on. I couldn’t do that. I couldn’t do that to her. Or to you. You don’t deserve someone who’s not comfortable with themselves. Who doesn’t know how to be themselves without you or El. You deserve someone like Carl, who can kiss you without fear or shame. Without the ghost of a girl hanging over his head.”
”Mike, I don’t—. You said you wanted to be best friends.”
”I lied. I fucking lied. Of course I did.”
Mike slammed his lips onto Will’s.
He pressed his lips eagerly into the other boy’s. His hands wandered into the boy’s bowl cut. Heat flooded him everywhere at once. Mike pushed Will against the desk, gasping into the warmth, hips flush against Will’s own.
Will pushed Mike off him. “Mike.”
“No. No I—“ Mike kissed Will again.
“Mike, stop!”
Mike did. “Holy shit I’m sorry.” He ran a hand through his hair. “I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry Will. I shouldn’t have done it.”
” Done what? Told me everything I’ve always wanted to hear and kissed me like I’ve always dreamed of?”
“Not that. Carl. He’s going to kill me.”
Will let out a feeble attempt of a laugh before holding the other boy in his arms. “I won’t let him.” He said, rubbing Mike’s back gently.