Chapter Text
PROLOGUE
“Listen up, Deku! You’re even worse than the rest of these damn rejects you Quirkless wannabe! You really think they’d let someone like you in when they could have me?”
“It’s just that I’ve wanted to be a hero since I was little. I may not have a Quirk, but I can still try my hardest, can’t I?”
Kacchan was right. I can’t.
CHAPTER ONE
“Courage of the Weak”
Talking to yourself like this is probably a bad habit - certainly an embarrassing one, if I ever pass someone with a mind-reading quirk - but even so, I haven’t been able to talk myself out of it yet.
My name is Izuku Midoriya. This is a superhuman society, with 80% of the population possessing some uncanny ability, what we now call quirks. The supernatural became normal and dreams a reality. With the appearance of these powers, a new profession emerged. We call those who fight for justice and help others in need heroes.
Some articles I found say it’s a coping mechanism, something about organizing and understanding your experience. Which makes some sense, sure. But that doesn’t make me feel much better about the way it comes off as narration for a story I’m trying to make myself the protagonist of. And doesn’t that word feel awkward and pathetic to even think.
Despite the x-rays from my doctor, despite the fact I haven’t manifested a quirk in the past 8 years since, I believed in my heart I would be a hero. Because when things seemed impossible, he never gave up. All Might, the world’s #1 hero, my idol, always fought with a smile on his face saving everyone he could. He was there. My world was crumbling, but I made a decision that day. No matter what anyone else thinks, I have to believe in myself. And I’ll keep smiling, just like him!
So maybe not the protagonist, but at least a character with some narrative focus. A person with plans and hopes and experiences that made sense, that were leading somewhere. Embarrassing or not, stating those ideas and hopes so explicitly to myself helped.
Or at least, it usually did.
I know now that I will never be a hero.
Sighing, I shook my head to get rid of that train of thought - a little too sharply, apparently, judging by the strange look a man passing close on the sidewalk shot my way. And look at that, I don’t even need a mindreader to embarrass myself. Luckily the streets were active at this time of day, full of people rushing home from work or school, so it was easy enough to duck my head and slip forward with the crowd. Taking the less populated way home would probably be a good idea though, so I shuffled my way to the edge of the foot traffic flow and slid into a small alley, relaxing once I felt more alone with my thoughts again.
Continuing my walk in relative silence, my thoughts wandered back to the school day. It had been like so many others. From the moment I showed my face, the rest of class mocked and ridiculed me. Obviously I didn’t like that so many of my peers actively thought I was beneath them, but the one that hurt the most was him: Katsuki Bakugo, who I never stopped calling Kacchan. He’d been my closest friend until I was diagnosed quirkless. Things between us warped after that, like so many others, and now I couldn’t remember the last time we’d had a normal interaction. Auntie still spoke to my mom occasionally, but Kacchan and I never spoke to or saw each other anymore outside school. Our mothers never mentioned our faded friendship though, and I was thankful for that.
So nothing out of the ordinary really, until the reminder about high school applications at the end of the day. When our teacher pointed out that I also wanted to go to U.A. High School, the most prestigious Hero Academy in all of Japan (and in my opinion the best in the world, because All Might went there!), the class erupted into laughter. And of course the loudest and meanest was Kacchan’s.
This in itself wasn’t surprising, and neither were the yelling and shoving that followed the final bell. Even the destruction of my newest analysis notebook was understandable, if frustrating (right, I’ll have to remember to rewrite the worst sections as soon as I get home, before any more of the ink runs from the pond water). What had surprised me were his parting words.
“You know, if you really want to be a hero so badly, I might know a way. Try taking a swan dive off the roof of the building and praying for a quirk in your next life!”
Okay, so maybe the core sentiment wasn’t surprising. But saying it like that - gods, what was Kacchan thinking? He just can’t say those sorts of things! What if someone took him seriously!
(What if indeed, since I definitely wasn’t. There definitely was not a small part of me that felt like drowning in the pain of those words, and from my closest friend, a small part that couldn’t help but think maybe, maybe it wouldn’t be so bad-)
A strange noise jolted me back to awareness, and I froze instinctively, eyes quickly scanning the underpass tunnel I walked partway through while distracted. It was a gurgling sound like a sticky drain, echoing as I turned to see- to see…
“A villain!?” and I was frozen again, my body shaking in fear. The villain’s form was massive and undulating, as if his body was a core of continuously erupting sludge. A face slid sickeningly though the mass of green, red rimmed eyes pinned on me. Some approximation of a mouth moved beneath the eyes, but anything it might had said was lost in the buzzing of my ears. And then it launched, and although I attempted to run, it smashed into me like high tide.
The sludge was everywhere and fighting me at every turn as I tried to struggle. I couldn’t move, couldn’t breathe, as the slime villain began forcing his way inside my body through my mouth. I can’t scream or get any air in - I can’t breathe!
That realization had my limbs flailing desperately, legs pumping and fingers scrabbling. I pulled and clawed, but its semi-liquid form prevented me from getting any traction. The villain’s words reverberated around me, but the buzzing became high pitched, matching the trembling static beginning to overtake my vision.
That meant I was passing out - not good. I forced my eyes toward the end of the tunnel I came from, hoping to see something - a hero I could alert, another person passing who could run for help, a stray pipe I could grab for leverage, anything - but there was nothing. Only the empty gloom of the tunnel, the light at the end almost mocking as my struggles began to slow.
My body…is getting…weak. I… I think I’m dying… Someone…help!
Even my mental voice was slowing, a cold detachment starting to creep over my mind. If only there really had been a mind reader around, huh? They’d have a chance at hearing me…
Static was almost all I could see, all I could hear, and I knew the last remnants of my consciousness were leaving me. And just as I had accepted it, just before it all went black-
”...texAS SMASH!!!!!!!!” The flood of pain was pulled away and I felt suddenly weightless. Through the buzzing I managed to turn my head slightly, following the noise, and saw a new shape against the light from the tunnel entrance. It was fuzzy, but something about the silhouette set off a ping of familiarity in my slowed mind.
Is that…All…Might?
And then I hit something very hard very suddenly, and the blackness swallowed me again.
I felt something, a swift pulsing of air towards the front of my face. It continued as I gained more awareness, until I tried shaking the sensation away as it began to overwhelm me. The wind stopped at my movement though, and a loud voice broke the silence.
“Sorry there, civilian! Had to make sure you would be okay!”
I…I knew that voice. Everyone knew that voice. Surely I was hallucinating or something but I wrenched my eyes open anyway because what if it was-
A figure, impossibly tall and imposing, and when I forced my eyes to focus - a white muscle t-shirt near ripping across his physique, blue eyes flashing over his iconic smile, and golden hair up in a style I’d recognize anywhere.
All Might. That voice was actually All Might’s. The rush of air was All Might’s own specialized emergency stimulant meant to wake those who had passed out! It’s actually him, All Might actually just saved me! He had to make sure that I was alright and awake because ALL MIGHT SAVED ME holy WOAH -
I couldn’t hear what he said next. He was there! The most amazing hero in the entire world. Standing right in front of me! This was it - I would ask him, and he would tell me what to do, how to make this horrible day something that made sense. Of course he would know, All Might could fix anything! I reached my hand out blindly, desperately, latching onto something before everything was moving again, and we were in the air.
Okay, let it be known that this is not what I intended to do, and if I knew he was about to leap off I probably would have done something different. But I will also NOT be letting go at this point for obvious reasons!
All Might was scolding me too, just barely audible over the roaring wind, but even so I couldn’t bring myself to regret reaching out. I just needed…him. Today of all days. I had to know.
We landed on some rooftop in the nearby area, and through his scolding and occasional cough I could tell he was preparing to jump away again.
“Wait!” I’d normally be embarrassed to shout at a hero like that (especially him, the hero of all heroes) but I couldn’t bring myself to stop. “Please, I just have to ask one question!”
Watching his form lock into place seconds away from releasing his power sent a heady rush of relief and desperate hope through me. This was it though, so I pushed past the dizziness to ask, “Is it possible to become a hero even if I don’t have a Quirk? I’m a normal kid without any powers. Can I ever hope to be someone like you?”
I shut my eyes almost involuntarily as the words finished leaving my mouth. As much as I craved his answer, I knew it would change everything. All Might was the pinnacle of what it meant to be a hero. If he believed that even I could be a hero, then it didn’t matter that no one else did, didn’t matter that I had no one to even acknowledge my dream outside my own head, didn’t matter what horrible things Kacchan said tomorrow or the next day or the next. I would never stop hoping, never-
“Some villains just can’t be beaten without powers. So no, I honestly don’t think you can become a hero without a quirk. Make sure your dreams are attainable, realistic. Police work is a noble profession if your goal is to help. Understand?”
And once again, I froze.
I didn’t even process All Might changing physical form into a deflated version of himself. He kept talking, some story about a villain fight that left him wounded beyond repair. An explanation, apparently, some final advice. None of it mattered. Even as he jumped away, leaving me alone in the middle of the roof, I felt nothing. The cold static was back, washing everything in an indistinct gray.
I honestly don’t think you can become a hero without a quirk.
I found myself moving, shuffling toward the spot where All Might had been. There was a short metal railing surrounding the roof’s edge, which the hero had easily leapt over with his enhanced strength. I couldn’t see any trace of him now.
Make sure your dreams are attainable, realistic. Understand?
Slowly, I placed my hands on the railing. My world was crashing down around me, my mind screaming, but I gripped the cold metal gently. It felt so far away despite being right in front of me, barely chest high. As far away as the empty street below, so great a distance and yet as close as a single step, one easy step past the railing.
I guess I took your advice to heart more than I realized, huh, Kacchan?
As though I summoned him with the thought, a loud explosion suddenly echoed from the city beyond, startling me back into awareness. Something was clearly happening - another attack, or some sort of accident? I latched onto the distraction like a lifeline, making my way to the access door and the stairs beyond to return to the street. The pounding of my feet was almost enough to drown out the lingering thoughts, flashes of green sludge and sharp blue eyes, a ruined notebook floating in a pond with the words Hero Analysis for the Future already beginning to blur and disappear into the water, a cacophony of voices that were pitying and mocking and scolding and angry, phrases that stab through my mind in cold knives of be realistic and swan dive-
As I was saying, the pounding of feet on stairs. Distant explosions, a possible incident. I’ll think about the rest later.
Much, much later.
The closer I got, the shorter the explosions became, until I turned a corner and found myself across the street from a large crowd huddled around the entrance to a large walkway. As I approached, another flash of flame lit up the sky, painting the faces of bystanders in stark red and shadow. Definitely some sort of villain attack then.
I don’t know why I bothered to keep moving once I realized. I should have turned around and continued my useless existence elsewhere. The world of heroes and villains wasn’t one that included me, I knew that now. But before I could do more than begin the shift of my feet, the crowd moved and I was able to see the scene beyond. It was hard to get a clear visual through the smoke, but I could see a large villain. Something about the shape seemed…familiar?
Then the smoke cleared further, and I saw it. A mound of sickly green-gray slime, eyes floating haphazardly above the slash of a mouth, screaming something at the surrounding heroes.
It was him, the sludge villain from before. But that didn’t make sense - All Might had saved me (and I firmly shoved away the flash of pain-shame-despair-empty that followed that name), had trapped the attacker in an empty bottle and was bringing him into custody. He’d shown me, so how was the villain free again? Unless - …unless something interrupted All Might. Something like a stupid, needy kid who just had to cling on and drag him to a random rooftop to ask a stupid question he already knew the answer to.
…if he…if All Might dropped the villain, that means it's my fault. This is my fault.
I could see other heroes at the scene stuck trying to take this villain down. Their quirks weren’t suited to the situation, they said, something about needing to wait for someone else.
I’m the one to blame. I’m the one All Might wasted his energy on.
I knew exactly what it was like to be in that person’s shoes, to be trapped and drowning and helpless. And I had been lucky enough to be saved, by the number one hero no less, only to ruin it almost immediately. Now another person was suffering, desperate and alone despite all of the people around.
I’m sorry…I’m so sorry.
Whoever was trapped within the sludge monster was alive and fighting to stay alive. They thrashed violently, revealing a bit of their head between waves of sludge. Spiky blonde hair bunched up in focus, and eventually the face, one I recognized instantly with a bolt of horror. Familiar red eyes, scrunched up in pain and fear, a plea for someone to help.
The sludge monster had Kacchan.
My feet left the ground before I could understand what happened.
I was running, sprinting toward that familiar face, already starting to disappear once more into the monster’s form. My body moved entirely on it’s own, shoving past the watching crowd and ignoring the shouts of alarm, my thoughts nothing but do something, help Kacchan, save him-
“Deku…?” Kacchan’s voice was rough and disbelieving, and I couldn’t blame him. What was I doing? Why was I running and why can’t I stop? Why was I trying to intervene, useless and quirkless and completely without any plan whatsoever, and gods this was a terrible idea.
But even so, the need to do something was stronger. The villain’s face solidified in the direction I now ran. My body reacted and I threw my backpack, aiming for one of those horrible eyes.
The villain recoiled from the sudden strike, causing his form to loosen. And then I was grabbing at the sludge form, desperately clawing pieces away, trying to get him out of there. Kacchan’s face came into view once more, his mouth now exposed.
“What do you think you’re doing Deku? I was totally fine!”
“Kacchan! I couldn’t just stand there and watch you–” was all I could get out as the force of a tsunami slammed into me.
The sludge villain had once again captured me within his fluid hold, and he wasted no time. Foul-smelling sludge surrounded me on all sides, shoving into my nose and mouth with bruising force.
There was no time to struggle, to think. I’d always been weak, but now I was also hurt and exhausted, drained of what little energy I had left. What little fight I could have put up was lost immediately as the sludge tore into my lungs.
Some villains just can’t be beaten without powers. Be realistic. Understand?
Just like before, but so much faster. Shadows flickered across my vision, first responders and heroes rushing around. A heavy-armed shape was screaming, “SAVE THE BOY! This thing’ll kill him!” So many heroes, so many quirks, and no one was doing a single thing to save me.
You know, if you really want to be a hero so badly, I might know a way. Try taking a swan dive off the roof of the building and praying for a quirk in your next life!
“What the hell, Deku! Fight back! Get out of here! IZUKU!” Kacchan was screaming too, much closer, but I could barely see him through the slime and the darkness closing in on my vision. At least that meant he was free, safe. I’d saved him, me, the quirkless deku. He’d have to live with that now, and some tiny, spiteful part of me was glad.
I know now that I will never be a hero.
Static was everywhere, everything, consuming every sight and sound. I knew what that meant, had known it when it happened before. I was dying. There would be no making it out of this now. Maybe that was okay. I couldn’t be a hero who saved everyone, hadn’t been even close. But at least I saved one, even if it came at the cost of my death. It was okay, it had to be.
Right?
But as darkness closed over me, I realized then that it wasn’t - it wasn’t fair, it wasn’t right, and it definitely wasn’t okay that this was how things would end. I’d never even make it out of middle school. Never even try to make it into UA, to prove them all wrong, to show that he could be useful and helpful and good. Izuku Midoriya wouldn’t get to even try to be a hero.
It’s…so selfish of me…but…
If only I had done today differently. Taken another way home, let All Might leave when he tried, just stayed on that roof instead of coming here. If only my life had been different, normal, and none of this happened at all. So many possibilities and choices, slipping through my fingers. All I was left with was regret.
I’m sorry…I just…wish…I…I had another chance…
Darkness swallowed me whole, and then there was nothing but black.
⚠︎ NOTIFICATION
[The Secret Quest:
“Courage of the Weak.”]
☑
⚠︎ NOTIFICATION
You have acquired the qualifications
to be a Player. Will you accept?
⚠︎ NOTIFICATION
Your heart will stop in 0.02 seconds
if you choose not to accept.
Will you accept?
Yes No
Yes