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The place that Prince Edward had brought us to was just like that little slice of paradise you’d always see advertised in magazines. The water was pristine and clear with palm trees swaying carelessly in the gentle breeze. I was almost certain I had even spied a few coconuts laying nestled in the soft white sand.
Part of me was still a little perplexed at how out of the blue the entire trip had seemed, but it was difficult not to let the mellow sights and sounds ebb into your worries and quietly wash them away.
It certainly appeared to work that way for Roberto, who had become quite melancholy the past couple of days due to the issue regarding his need to marry soon or else forfeit the throne. The impromptu volleyball game and the company of his fellow princes quickly brought the smile back to his face. It warmed my heart to see him appear so carefree again, even if for just this stolen moment.
I had discarded my shoes and buried my feet in the sand as I sat, marveling at how these men could play such a vigorous game in their formalwear. The weather was not scorching, but it was warm enough that Prince Wilfred had taken it upon himself to find shelter in the shade. Keith had eventually forefeited his suit jacket and Joshua, his scarf. I watched fondly as Roberto, some of his hair sticking to his forehead with the sweat, his cheeks flushed on either side of his bright and beautiful smile, kicked off his shoes and flung his coat absently into the sand between his shots. He really was like a little boy sometimes.
My eyes wandered past the game at hand and regarded Prince Edward. His eyes locked onto mine, as though he could feel that I was looking at him even from this distance, and he smiled warmly. It was infectious and I couldn’t help but return it.
“Oh… Oh-oh-oh!” I heard Roberto’s voice call out in this one instance I happened to look away. I turned my attention back in front of me just fast enough to see Roberto take a dive to catch the ball that had been on its way towards me. It slipped through his fingers, and as it rolled lazily to a stop at my ankles, he landed not-too-gracefully face-first in the sand.
“Roberto! Are you okay?” I shuffled my feet out of the sand and got up to crouch by his form. He lifted his head and spat out some sand, propping himself up on his arms. His eyes squinted at me and grinned as granules toppled from his face.
“Guess I’m out,” he said.
I helped him dust himself off as he glanced over his shoulder.
“Hey, Glenny-poo! Take over for me!”
“I absolutely will not,” Glenn called back, looking as indignant as ever.
“But then who will defend my honor?” Roberto pouted. He turned his gaze to Wilfred, mustering the biggest puppy-dog eyes he could. “Wiiiiil?”
The blonde haired prince gave a visible sigh, but still rose to his feet casually.
“I suppose I have no choice.”
Roberto clapped happily and I watched as Prince Edward also joined the fray as Wilfred’s partner. Despite the fact this new team was extremely laid back in comparison to Joshua and Keith’s, the two of them seemed to hold their own just fine. I watched them alongside Roberto for a time, occasionally letting my eyes wander to his profile when I thought he might not notice. He was positively glowing as the sunset played across his features and his hair swayed just lightly in the breeze. I found myself staring just a little too long. He must have felt my gaze as he turned to look back at me, laughing softly when I glanced away and my face went red.
“Shall we take a walk?” he asked and I nodded.
“Sure, but what about your things?”
“They won’t go anywhere. I’ll come get them later.” He held his hand out to me then as if it were the most natural thing in the world and I felt my heart leap. Part of me wanted to hesitate, conflicted as ever about the feelings I secretly harbored for him. We had held hands before and even then I thought it was more of a intimate gesture than he seemed to.
‘Friends hold hands.’ I remember his rationale and had immediately wanted to argue, but couldn’t bring myself to do it. That truth held firm even now and I couldn’t resist the expectant look in his eyes, sliding my hand into his own.
We walked along the shore saying little to each other, simply enjoying the company and serene landscape. The sun continued to sink slowly beyond the horizon, turning the sky into a canvas of pinks and purple clouds against a hazy orange back-drop. Just as I found myself admiring it, Roberto slowed to a stop to look out towards the sea as well.
“You know, I really have to hand it to Ed sometimes. He really knows how to pick out the beautiful things.”
“Yes, he does,” I agreed, glancing his way. “How are you feeling?” His expression didn’t change much, but it dropped, ever so slightly, and I almost wished I hadn’t asked.
“I’m alright,” he said. “It’s kind of hard to be upset when I’m in such a lovely place with such a lovely person.” He turned that smile back towards me and I felt both flattered and troubled by his words. Our hands were still clasped loosely together and I wondered if maybe I shouldn’t pull away.
This was getting difficult for me. I had gotten nothing but mixed messages from him lately. At times it seemed as though there might be something in him akin to my own feelings, but then my hopes always got dashed when he’d insist in the presence of others that we were just friends. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to be his friend – I wanted more than anything to be there for him – but the word seemed more and more a barrier to my heart every time I heard it.
“How are you feeling?” He brought me from my reverie, echoing my own words. When I focused on him again, he looked genuinely concerned.
“I’m fine,” I said, almost automatically with a smile. “Like you said… It’s difficult to be upset here.”
I felt the fingers holding my hand move an and intertwine again, more firmly this time.
“You don’t have to be so strong all the time,” he said, taking a step closer to me and making me all too aware of his presence. “I know this has been hard on you, despite how much I’ve tried to shield you from it. Heh… Or maybe even more so because I’ve been trying…” The laugh was hollow and bittersweet. I looked up at him again, feeling my entire body shiver when his finally met mine. It had to be the breeze. It had been getting cooler with the sun’s departure and I wrapped my free arm about myself as my hair began to tickle my cheeks.
Maybe he noticed my chill, or perhaps it was something else entirely, but Roberto released my hand then and wrapped me up in his arms. I was instantly soothed by the warmth of him and gradually found the courage to bring my arms up to return the embrace. I buried my face against his shoulder, daring to let myself give in to this, no matter what it was.
“Thank you for staying with me…,” Roberto said softly by my ear, making my skin flush.
“Always…,” I murmured, but didn’t know if he could hear me. All I know is that he seemed to hold me a little tighter, his fingers winding up in my shirt a little, before he leaned back just enough to look at me.
I swear I could feel his breath.
If it had not become so perfectly etched in my memory, I would almost believe what happened then was just a figment of my imagination. The look on his face was one of puzzlement, as if he wasn’t quite sure of himself as he inched a little closer, withdrew, and then bridges the tiny gap between us and pressed his lips against mine.
The kiss was quick, something stolen, but more than enough to send my heart reeling and my mind rushing to comprehend and memorize the feeling.
Roberto’s brows furrowed a little and he drew back with a renewed rosiness to his cheeks. He fumbled, mouth opening and closing as he struggled to find something to say.
“Friends kiss….sometimes,” he mumbled, despite the fact his flustered reaction gave him away horribly. The fact his eyes kept darting to me to see if I was buying this excuse at all only confirmed all my suspicions.
I smiled a little bit, crookedly.
“Yes, I suppose they sometimes do….” He looked relieved and I was glad for playing along this time. It was true, after all, wasn’t it? Didn’t the strongest relationships begin with friends discovering these things together? For once, the term didn’t defeat me as it did before; instead it made my heart swell with hope.
As Roberto shyly reached out his hand again for mine, I took it without a second thought this time.
There was a lot to be expected of him in the coming days; a rush of decisions and responsibilities. At the very least I could allow his heart to move at it’s own pace and have faith that, one day, it would find the courage to dance in tempo with mine.