Chapter Text
At some point in their lives, people wonder where we go after we die. To heaven? To hell? Do those places even exist? It is a question that science will never be able to explain or ensure with certainty. Because no one returns after a final breath.
Death is death: dry, definitive, painless, something new to discover. Life, on the other hand, is what you cling to in those dark days when you feel that you cannot go on anymore. But what is that place you go to when your heart continues beating physically, yet your soul seems to have drifted away from your body, disconnected from the world around you?
Sea did not know, and he was afraid. Before his eyes, everything moved in slow motion, as if he were trapped in an overly vivid nightmare.
He knew he was in the car with his parents, enjoying a calm trip. He was aware of the music coming from his headphones, melodies that were abruptly interrupted when his mother’s piercing scream echoed inside the car. And then he felt in every bone of his body the violent impact he received when the truck in front crashed into them at full speed.
He was unconscious for who knows how long, because when he finally opened his eyes, the shrill sound of police sirens surrounded him. He also heard the voice of a man shouting his name in desperation. Sea knew who that man was, but no sound came out of his mouth. He was as if trapped inside his own body, unable to react or communicate. He tried to look around, realizing the devastation—the car was a mass of twisted metal, and blood filled the seats, staining everything a crimson color. However, despite the magnitude of the scene, he felt no pain at all.
« Am I dead? »
It was the first thing he could think. Maybe he was, maybe he had crossed the threshold into the afterlife without even realizing it. Or perhaps he was only gravely injured, with his head struck and his mind confused by the trauma.
He tried to get up, moving with difficulty among the twisted remains of the car. To his surprise, he pulled out his foot, which had been stuck beneath the seat, with astonishing ease. He felt no pain at all, not even a twinge. He moved forward, toward where a door had already been torn away. He did not see his parents’ bodies anywhere, and with all his being he hoped that they had already been rescued and rushed to the hospital.
—He’s unconscious— he heard someone say.
—Is he breathing?— someone else asked.
—His chest rises and falls slowly, but yes, he’s breathing— the first voice replied.
Sea frowned in confusion. Who was unconscious? He felt fine, or at least he felt no pain, and he could move with relative ease. He was sure he could get out of the car on his own.
—We need to remove the back part of the car. His foot is trapped under the seat— said a third voice, this time with a more authoritative tone.
When he heard those words, Sea felt a chill run down his spine. Something did not add up. It was as if they were talking about another person, about someone else trapped in the car. Following his instinct, he turned around, toward the place from which he had freed himself only a few seconds earlier.
And that is what he would never be able to remove from his nightmares.
Seeing his own body lying there, inert and destroyed, with his legs covered in blood, one of his feet crushed under the weight of twisted metal and his face scratched and covered in cuts, was the most terrifying and surreal thing he could ever have witnessed.
But how was that possible? How could he see himself there, in that state? He did not understand it. With his heart pounding a thousand miles an hour, he got out of the car and checked himself from head to toe; he was intact, his clothes stained, but without injuries.
He looked around, but no one seemed to see him leave the car. He approached the paramedic who was observing the scene with a worried expression, trying to get his attention. But the paramedic did not even turn to look at him. He passed one of his hands right in front of his eyes, but it was as if his hand were invisible. Desperate, he tried to grab the young man’s arm to demand his attention, but instead of feeling something soft and warm like exposed skin, it was as if his hand passed straight through him. At that moment, Sea panicked.
The rear part of the car was ripped off suddenly by a firefighter. Sea watched with his heart in his throat as they removed his poor body with such delicacy, as if they feared breaking it even more. They carefully placed it on a stretcher and put a respirator over his mouth, while one of the paramedics urgently asked him to cling to life.
He did not know what to do. He was paralyzed by fear and confusion, unable to process what he was seeing. But then, the voice of another officer caught his attention, pulling him out of his trance. He looked in that direction and saw another unconscious body on a stretcher, an elderly man. He could see a windshield wiper rod embedded in his leg.
—Ma’am, I need you to calm down and…— the officer was saying in a gentle but firm tone, trying to control the situation.
—He’s my husband, you must take him to the hospital quickly or he could die!— sobbed a gray-haired woman, clinging desperately to the officer’s arm. Her eyes were full of tears and terror.
—They’re working as fast as they can, ma’am. The highway is blocked, but we’ll sort this out— the officer comforted her, trying to calm her.
And then, Sea recognized him. That face was so familiar that he almost burst into tears instantly. That sweet and kind face, those bright eyes and that curly hair… Sea wanted to run into the arms of his best friend.
—He may not survive— he heard a voice beside him. The same face, the same body of the man on the stretcher was standing next to him. —It wasn’t my intention, I just wanted to answer my wife’s call…
His eyes were full of tears, and Sea assumed his own must be the same.
—I don’t know what happened…
The man looked at him with pity.
—A crash. They took the others away just moments ago.
—My parents?— he hurried to ask.
—I think so. They said you were in worse condition.
Sea could not contradict him.
—But why can I see my body like this?— he asked with a trembling voice.
He looked at his hands, watching how they seemed to grow faint and translucent, as if they were losing their physical form.
—It’s a halo— the man replied, in a gentle and understanding tone. —It’s an energy that surrounds living beings, a kind of aura. Sometimes, when death is near, that energy manifests and allows the soul to separate from the physical body, as if you could see yourself from the outside.
—And how am I supposed to get back to my body?— Sea asked desperately.
—Unless those men who save lives can save yours, you won’t be able to— the man replied in a somber tone. —You would become something like a ghost if you have unfinished business in this world.
Shia! Sea was becoming more and more frightened. But he also needed information, answers that would help him understand what was happening. The man’s explanation was not realistic nor sufficient to calm his anguish.
—But…— Sea stammered, trying to form another question, but the words got stuck in his throat.
Suddenly, his body felt heavy, as if he were being dragged toward the ground. A sudden dizziness invaded him, clouding his vision and making him stagger. The man looked at him calmly, with an expression of serenity on his face.
—You have to live, son. You have a life ahead of you— the man told him in a soft voice.
And then, Sea or his almost ghostly version fell unconscious, sinking into a dark and silent abyss.