Work Text:
Fuck, Ragatha needed to get this paper done ASAP.
She’s been everywhere all week – each of her classes demanding more work than the last –and she feels just about ready to fall apart. Ragatha considers herself a productive person, never straying from her strategically organized online calendar. But mid-terms struck her like a truck, and suddenly she had slipped into the ocean that is her current workload.
Now, Ragatha sits in the cheap desk chair in her dorm room, overly conscious of the work she's expected to finish tonight. Her alarm clock blinks, 10:22 PM. Typically not a time she’d consider late, but through the last week and a half, she hasn’t slept earlier than 2:00 AM. She eyes her bed longingly.
She needs a break. She needs sleep. But she can’t, not yet – she has barely an hour and a half to hand this in. As if to reignite her resolve, she reaches for another sip of coffee – her third cup today – and tries to reign in her focus back onto her paper.
She taps at her keyboard – barely forming a coherent sentence or two – before finding herself zoning out again. Ragatha honestly thinks she’d have fallen asleep then and there if the buzzing of her phone didn’t bring her back to reality. She blinks once, twice – then registers the caller, Jax.
Oh. Right. She’d been practically ignoring him all week. Not out of any hostility, she may add, but between balancing studying and her assignments, Ragatha knew that she would be in a much deeper rut had she allowed herself to entertain Jax. He very intentionally brought her away from her perfectly planned schedule; and with her workload as dangerous as it was right now, she couldn’t afford to mess around.
She also just wasn’t really sure what to make of him at all. Jax kept himself hard to read, his behaviour consistently unpredictable in a way that induced major headaches. In any group setting, he’d act like Ragatha was his primary rival; poking, prodding, doing everything in his power to one-up her. But afterwards – when it's just him in Ragatha’s car as she drives him home from whatever party they find themselves in – he’d shift his tone ever so slightly, and Ragatha let herself believe it was because he liked to spend time alone with her.
As much as she enjoyed the song and dance that was bantering with Jax, she wasn’t ready to play that game at her current point of mental exhaustion. She looked back at her buzzing phone, and she briefly considered ignoring his call; to silence her phone and close her eyes.
Perhaps he can have her for five minutes... Until it hits 10:30 PM, then her five-minute break will be over.
“...Jax?” Ragatha spoke, sleepiness lacing her voice more than she’d like.
“Heya dollface.” Jax responded in his characteristically lazy cadence. It was the first time she’d heard his voice in a few weeks now, and she had to admit the familiarity, even through the phone, was a bit soothing. She envied his careless disposition.
“What’s up? I’m a bit occupied, please make it quick.”
“God, you’ve been ‘busy’ all week. Can’t a guy just call you to say hi?”
“I don’t think you’ve ever called me first, Jax.”
“Not until you made me double text you, like, twice this week. See how desperate you’ve made me?”
“Yeah okay. Sorry,” she replied, exhaustion seeping into her tone as she tried and failed to muster up the energy to entertain Jax’s nonsense. “I’ve got a lot to do tonight, okay? If you don’t need anything immediately, I need to get back to work.”
“Relax, Rags. I’m not here to add to your ever infinite pile of work,” he mocked, and she felt a tinge of frustration building up. “I don’t need anything except for you to let me in. I’m dropping by your dorm in a few.”
“Wait, what?” was all Ragatha managed to articulate before Jax ended the call.
She sat still for a moment, the arm gripping her phone still suspended mid-air as she processed what he said. She didn’t have time for this! He knew she’s been stressed out of her mind, she didn’t understand why he decided to add to it now of all times. She’d been carefully trying to swim back up to safety, narrowly avoiding the constant tidal waves trying to drown her, and there he comes to push her down just beneath the surface. Finish the job.
She retied her hair and sat back, lying in wait, trying not to entertain that particular line of thought. She mentally prepared to immediately kick him out.
It was only a few minutes until he arrived at the door, his dorm room situated one floor above hers. He knocked three times in quick succession, as if he was already impatient from waiting.
She opened the door, and there he was. He grinned at the sight of her, posed with one hand on his hip and a paper bag in the other. She wouldn’t - couldn’t allow him to distract her for long, the deadline looming over her like a particularly heavy weight. She cursed herself for even letting herself get into this situation, soothed that thought with the knowledge tht, then cursed twenty times over as she looked up at Jax’s face again.
“What do you want?” She asked him, arms crossed. She hoped her exhaustion wasn’t showing on her face, but wasn’t too confident.
“Missed you too, Rags,” Jax responded sarcastically. “God, you look horrible. Did you even sleep last night?” He attempted to walk in as he spoke, but Ragatha blocked the doorway, lightly pushing him away.
“I’m serious. I have a shit ton to do. Why are you here?”
“‘Cause I’m sick of seeing you like this. Look at you, I bet you didn’t even eat today. C’mon, you can afford a snack break.” He shook the paper bag at her. Donuts, probably sourced from the shitty place near their student residence.
If Ragatha’s brain wasn’t as fried as it was, she would have realized how out of character this was for Jax. Checking up on her, bringing her snacks; she’d be turning around this interaction in her mind for ages, asking yet again what this means and what his intentions really are. And maybe she will, when she wakes up tomorrow with a clearer head. But for now – maybe for the better – she doesn’t register his behaviour.
The promise of food makes Ragatha realize how hungry she’s been; even if it’s just a couple old donuts from the convenience store. As she takes a moment to consider his offer, Jax slides into her dorm and immediately makes himself comfortable in her desk chair.
She needs him to leave… After she has a donut or two. It's a powerful bribe, sugary food. One even she can't resist.
“Fine… But I need the chair. And if you’re gonna stay here, please be quiet.”
“But I’m already so comfortable here, and you need a break anyway. You can have it back later.” He drawled, knowing very well he’s blocking her access to her workspace. He tosses her the paper bag after grabbing himself a donut.
She would have – maybe should have – argued with him further, but the second she sat on her bed, she couldn’t help but collapse backwards with a sigh. She hasn’t moved much from her desk at all in like, six hours? Seven? She sighed, allowing her mind to blur for a second or two before remembering she had company - and more importantly, work to get back to. She sat back up and grabbed a donut. Jax eyed her, clearly analysing her every action.
“Isn’t this assignment for Kinger’s class? Why don’t you just beg for an extension?” Jax spoke between bites of donut, gesturing for her to pass him another one.
“Because I don’t need one,” Ragatha said, handing him the bag, watching him rummage through it for a few seconds. “Besides, it’d look really shitty of me if I asked for one a couple hours before the deadline, right?”
“But Kinger loooves you, Rags. He literally wants you to be his TA – that guy’s like, practically your dad. I’m pretty sure he would let you push for a few more days.” He argues with a grin, as if he knows for a fact he’s winning this. He leaned forward as he spoke, as if examining all the signs of exhaustion on her.
“Face it, Ragatha, you’re burnt out.”
She didn’t look at him, just looking down at her half eaten donut as she considered the idea. Burnt out. It flashed into her head - the instant relief, the softness of her bed, the warmth of her blankets… For just a moment, she thought of the weight being lifted from her shoulders.
Despite how good it sounded, Ragatha also knew she had a reputation to maintain. She was Kinger’s favourite for a reason; for her punctuality and her enthusiasm. She couldn’t help but feel like she would be letting him down — and letting herself down, too. And the longer she spent considering options, the longer she was away from work; she needed to make a decision now.
“I can see you overthinking your brains out. Just do it, Rags. I know Kinger won’t give a fuck. If he does, I will literally write your next paper for you.” He says with a confident finality, getting up from his chair and walking over to her.
“C’mooooon Rags. We can email him right now and get it over with.” He grabs her wrists and pulls her up, bringing her back to the chair, shuffling through tabs and pulling up Outlook with ease, signing into her account. Like he's done this a million times before, this kind of intervention.
Ragatha lets him do it, slightly in awe of how… surprisingly sweet it was. She could bet Jax is going through the motions like this on purpose; to make her think that he’s only acting this way because she's “burdening” him or something of the like, but she had a feeling this was out of genuine care. And that reason was enough to push her to write that email, if it meant just a little more time with him like this.
“God, fine. I guess… I guess he wouldn’t be too mad about it.” She admits, defeated. She sits down in the chair, finally letting the poorly hidden exhaustion seep out. Jax stands behind it, resting his hands on her shoulders. It prompts her to relax her posture a bit.
They rest in a comfortable silence as Ragatha works on the new draft Jax had created, writing up a brief email asking for an extension. She barely registers Jax resting his head on top of hers, likely under the guise of leaning in to read her screen better. His arms move to hug her neck. The weight of him is reassuring rather than suffocating - entirely different from the heavy stress that was occupying her. This was warm and involved, so different to the cold and detached weight of a deadline she's learnt to live with for.. fuck, this entire semester. Maybe the entire year.
She finally sends the email once she's satisfied with it - after rereading it a good three times, closing her laptop and leaning back into Jax with a sigh. She’s careful with her movement – if Jax realizes how vulnerable he’s letting himself be, he’ll switch up immediately. And Ragatha really needs this right now. She can be a little selfish, just this once.
They sit like that for a while, and Ragatha lets herself process all the stress she's been holding onto since last week. She knows very well her problem isn’t over, that she still has to finish that essay within the week long extension she requested (originally just 3 days, but Jax pushed her to ask for more, just greedy), but the relief she’s feeling is incredible, even if her extension hasn’t even been confirmed.
It lasts until it doesn’t, as Jax suddenly rises from his position, arms leaving her neck. She briefly mourns the warmth.
“Okay now, go the fuck to bed. You’re practically falling asleep in the chair, Rags.” He swivels her chair away from the desk, facing the bed.
“Right, right…” Ragatha half mumbles, because the last week had come to crash onto her like a weighted blanket, all her movements demanding much more labour. She sluggishly rises and rubs at her eyes. There’s a slow movement in her peripheral; realizes Jax is putting on his coat, getting ready to leave.
She wants to say something to stop him. Wants to keep him here for a little longer, be properly grateful for his help. Instead she sits on her bed, meekly speaking.
“...Thank you. For coming to see me.”
“Don't need to thank me,” He mumbles, before shrugging. “Somebody had to stop you from working yourself to death. Just had to be me this time.”
“Still. Thank you.” She rebuffs, unwilling to let her gratitude slide off of him so easily. She wants it to seep in. He seems a little surprised by her insistence, before schooling his expression back into a smirk.
“Yeah, yeah, okay. You can thank me,” He clicks his tongue. “By not letting this happen again. The world won't stop spinning if you take a break for a day.”
Ragatha sighs. She knows she can't promise him that it won't happen again, knows that old habits like this die hard, but she does let a little breathy laugh out, nodding.
“I'll try my best.”
“Good enough.” Jax responds, and his hand hesitates where it resides in his pocket, she spots the little twitch in his arm before his hand lands on her shoulder, an outspoken show of camaraderie. She lets him have his moment, before moving her hand to lie over his.
There's a beat of silence, two beats, three, before he removes his hand, letting it uselessly hang by his side rather than go back in his pocket. She thinks he just might ask to stay under the guise of making sure she doesn't just go and work herself away again, but the step back he takes echoes in the room even with the carpeted floors, and she has to brighten her smile to hide her quiet disappointment.
“O-kay. Gonna get going now.”
“Yeah.” Ragatha nods, following his steps as he moves toward the door, watching him unlock it and step outside. She watches as he turns, takes a breath. About to say something. Quietens down and gives her a wave.
“See you around?” She supplies, trying to break the sudden tension.
“Yeah. See ya.” Jax nods, turns to leave. Ragatha watches him go for an appropriate amount of time, thank you, before shutting the door and locking it, pressing her forehead against the cold wood and wishing for warmth. A sigh leaves her without her permission, and she makes a beeline straight to her bed, flopping over onto it.
She wants to sleep. Push away all this stress, all these feelings aside for another night of work. Maybe she’ll finally get a rest day tomorrow, or maybe she’ll fall back into the trap of productivity.
But for now she turns her head on the pillow, and sees a bag of half-eaten donuts. And she thinks that Jax’s visit was more necessary than either of them will ever admit.