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English
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Published:
2026-01-14
Updated:
2026-01-14
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2,971
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9/?
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Bad luck is stalking me

Summary:

A girl with a gun almost kills me and this guy follows me everywhere, that woman in a fedora is scary, Felix stop following me! that dead guy from the bench sends me on a quest to find the fucking Holy Grial or whatever, FELIX KEEPS FOLLOWING ME- NO WE ARE NOT FRIENDS and a whole other bunch of stuff happen to me so yeah (Felix owes me a Kinder so I guess I wont kill him).

Trigger warning: Swears, Blood, Fights, Cringe, Bad Writting In General, More Stuff I Don't Remember...

Chapter 1: Ado and the psycho girl with a gun

Chapter Text

You know you really fucked up when you procede to be chased by a little girl with a 44 calibre gun. I can assure you, little girls with 44 calibre guns are like, the worst. Ah never mind, turns out there are worse things.

Anyway, I'll explain myself: I was one random day, Tuesday seven in the month of July. It actually happened to be my birthday, so it wasn't exactly a random day. Therefore, I shouldn't have been that surprised, I mean like every cliche novel starts with the main character's birthday for some reason.

I was with my besties near the beach, I don't really remember why, and the weather was so hot, as in I was fr melting.

I was going to ask my friends to buy me an ice cream (I do have a problem with eating to much ice cream), when this little short girl, with this long black hair that reminded me of crows and these blue-green eyes that reminded me of my sister's bff for some reason. She was wearing this like weird white dress, that reached her knees, and that had this big, also white bow that wrapped around her thighs. Idk why I remembered with this amount of detail, maybe it was my brain saying: *Oy girl like watch out she's de dangerous.* Obviously I do not listen to my brain because both it and I are stupid.

Well anywho, she looked at me directly onto the eyes, with this indescifrable gaze, and spoke to me for the first time, 'cause, well, I didn't know her obviously (I think).

"Give me the sceptre."

Tbh, my honest reaction was to think: *wtf?*, and say:

"What?" (Bro she was like 10)

"The Wizard's sceptre."

Nah so I fr thought the girl was like playing some weird fantasy game, so I decided to join, obviously.

"You'll never have the mystical sceptre of the Wizard! Only me, Queen of the Apprentice Guild can bear its power! You'll never beat one of the Fallen!" Bro I was on fire!

Yeah, so the kid hit me with the "seriously?" glare, as much as my friends, and like the rest of the street, since I was literally shouting like I was possessed. Not that I cared about them.

Anyways, that's when said little girl took out the 44 calibre gun and shot the poor grandpa that was just randomly sitting in a bench, which happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. Poor grandpa.

Now that's, when I ran.

"Girl, where you going?" Shouted my dumbass friends, who fr didn't want to run. So like I didn't stop and I pointed to the poor grandpa who later motionless on the bench, unconscious or worse (probably worse tho). And then at the FUCKING SCARY GIRL WITH THE GUN. Sometimes, my friends were truly blind people.

But this time they were legit not seeing the girl. Like they looked around as if they were looking for something, besides the girl was literally in front of them. They did curiously look at Grandpa, by the position he was in the bench, it seemed as if he had fallen asleep. But going back to the girl, like it was incredible, they were ignoring her completely. As if they didn't even see her! Well, that's when I kind of noticed she wasn't there anymore.

"You are correct, they are unable to see me..." Said voice just kind of sounded just from behind me , so I turned around instinctively, "Now, I suggest you give me the sceptre, If you don't wanna die." She concluded with a terrifying smile that scared the shit out of me.

"What the fuck are you talking about???" I was kind of desperate and all, seeing that she wasn't there anymore literally pointing a real life gun at me (or at least I hoped it was a real one and not a feel 'cause I'd look stupid otherwise). No wait, never mind, let it be fake. "What sceptre of the Holy Shit do you want??"

"Shut up, child, you know of what I speak." *No, like that's the whole point of asking a question* It was still weird how she called me child when she was like five foot tall but I assure you she was terrifying asf.

Probably, I should have just ran away again, but like I tired, and anyways, I don't like dying.