Archive of Our Own ^beta

Steve didn’t like Jonathan, and Jonathan didn’t like Steve. They had made that perfectly clear during their conversation in Dimension X.

The pair had also made it clear that they would both back off from Nancy. Just because Jonathan had broken up with her, it didn’t mean they didn’t still have feelings for each other, and it certainly didn’t mean that Steve would pursue her either.

Steve had been so sure his crush on Nancy had completely dissipated by now; he had clarified it countless times when he was bickering over the topic with Dustin, back when Dustin was in his match-making phase. So why was there something still nagging him in the back of his mind? Why did he feel a glimmer of hope when he found out about Jonathan and Nancy’s breakup?

That was a thought for another day; Steve had his priorities, and having some crazy realization while he was lying in bed in his pajamas was definitely not one of them.

Pushing the thought to the back of his mind, he crawled out of his bed, lazily stretching his limbs as the morning light filtered through the blinds and cast bright stripes across his cluttered room. Piles of clothes dotted the floor, reminding Steve to clean his room later. God, he was so bad at chores lately, and there were so many, seeing as he basically took care of the entire house now.

He cast a quick glance at his clock, its red digits glowing against a stack of cassettes, while he hopped into his jeans. Panic quickly arose in his chest when he saw the time displayed. 11:17 AM. Shoot. Steve had promised to meet Dustin at his house at 11:30 to drive them to the diner across town, where they planned to meet up with the rest of the party.

Dustin hadn’t clarified whether Steve was actually joining the group there, but either way, Steve didn’t mind.

“I’m sick of babysitting those kids anyway. Can’t Dustin just get a goddamn license already, anyway? He must be old enough by now.” He muttered, shrugging a navy sweater over his head, determined to get out the door before he ended up becoming even later.

He rushed through his bathroom routine, teeth brushed hastily and not for nearly long enough, and four puffs of Farrah Fawcett spray in his dampened hair. Damp, never wet.

Steve had become better at leaving the house in this state. In high school, he would need hours to get ready, usually spending a good chunk of that time staring at himself in the mirror, scouring his face for any imperfections that Tommy H and Carol could make fun of him for.

Slipping his Nikes on and reaching for his keys, Steve sped out the door and into his car. 11:25. If Steve drove quickly enough, he might be able to avoid Dustin’s wrath.

-

“What the hell, man, you’re like, two whole minutes late!” Dustin berated in the passenger seat.

“Oh, I’m sorry! Mind you, if I could teleport, I would! Shouldn’t you have your driver's license by now anyway?”

That seemed to shut Dustin up, who grumbled a few words underneath his breath before finally settling down.

The pair drove in silence for a few moments before Steve cleared his throat and spoke up again.

“So, how’s that, uh, Dungeons & Dragons game of yours going?” Steve was trying to be more interested in Dustin’s hobbies lately, especially after the fight they had in the Upside Down. He wanted to be more like Eddie to the kid, an older brother rather than just a “babysitter”. Dustin wasn’t a baby anymore; he was almost an adult, in fact, and Steve had to get used to that. Steve wanted to rewind time, back to the days when he would work with Robin in Scoops Ahoy, but he knew that wasn’t possible. So he just had to suck it up and grow up.

“It’s going good,” Dustin started. “Maybe I could get Mike to write a campaign that the whole group can play, even Joyce. I mean, I wouldn’t be able to persuade him, but Will definitely could. It’s so unfair, Mike never listens to the rest of the party! Seriously, what is his problem?”

Oh yeah, Steve thought to himself as he blocked out Dustin’s tangent. He had forgotten that part of showing interest in people was getting involved. Listen, Steve had improved a lot since his high school days, but he still sometimes felt himself slip back into his old demeanor, especially when he was struggling. It was sometimes just so much easier to be mean than to fake politeness and contentment. That was something his dad had taught him over the years, along with Tommy and Carol and Billy and a bunch of other people Steve didn’t want to remember.

They had shaped him into an idiot, somebody who bullied people for fun. Specifically Jonathan. God, Steve still hadn’t properly apologized to him. The guilt he carried from what he did to Jonathan had been an increasing topic of his thoughts lately, and he just wanted it to stop already, so that Steve could stop beating himself up over the situation.

As he drew closer to the diner, he parked his BMW and, with it, his jumbled thoughts.

-

The two boys approached the entrance, Dustin bouncing ahead when he caught sight of the party through the window. Steve hesitated for a moment, wondering if he was welcome to join, before he saw a boy with brown, shaggy hair beckoning for him to come in. Jonathan Byers. Dear God, why was he here? He must have driven El or something, since she still didn’t have a bike, and could no longer fit on the back of Will or Mike’s.

Approaching the booth in which the party was squeezed into, Steve tried to nudge his way onto the edge of the seat, which was brightly colored, yet worn.

“Sorry. This booth’s full. I guess you’ll just have to sit with Jonathan somewhere else.” Mini Wheeler piped up. Although he seemed much happier after the whole Upside Down thing had ended and he broke up with El, he was still by far the most annoying kid in the group. Little squirt.

Steve glanced at the others for help, but they all avoided eye contact. He didn’t want to be rude and leave Jonathan, so he sat down opposite him in the next booth, trying to make himself appear comfortable.

Jonathan retrieved a menu, browsing through the selection of food, so Steve did the same. They sat in awkward, slightly uncomfortable silence like that, holding sticky, stained menus and pretending to browse the food options for a few minutes before a waiter made her way over to their table.

“Welcome to Hawkins diner. What can I get for you today?” She drawled, raising her voice slightly to make herself heard over the sound of chatter in the background.

After ordering and receiving their food, after many failed attempts at small talk, Steve finally decided to speak up about what had been nagging at his mind. Might as well get it out of the way now.

“Hey, uh, Jonathan? I just wanted to say, I’m really sorry, man. I know we kinda had this conversation already in Dimension X, but, like, I feel like you deserve a better apology, y’know. I was such a jerk to you in high school, which was ages ago, and more important stuff has happened since then, but still. You didn’t deserve anything that my group and I did to you; it wasn’t cool, and I really shouldn’t have done it. Jeez, this is a terrible apology, but I just wanted to say it and get it off my mind, I guess.”

Jonathan seemed to consider what he said for a moment before replying, “Thanks, man, that means a lot. You were an idiot then, to be fair, but you were right in saying that it has been years. Honestly, I’m sorry too. I was being super creepy, taking those pictures of you guys, and I shouldn’t have beaten you up, no matter what you said or did. I could have killed you, Jesus Christ.”