Work Text:
It was a nice, quiet afternoon at a small town outside the city walls. The long road connecting to it bare yet peaceful. The townsfolk out and about in their usual daily routine, the animals enjoying their natural habitat.
Or at least, it WOULD have been peaceful if not for the disruption of a sudden police car chase.
The people and animals could only watch with annoyance as they run and hide to get out of the way from the blaring police vehicles in hot pursuit of their target. Said target in question driving recklessly without a care in the world.
"THIS IS CHIEF HOPE ON HOT PURSUIT!!", the officer leading the chase yelled into her police radio. "IT'S PERCIVAL MCLEACH AGAIN!!"
McLeach laughed manically in response. He's been on Hope's wanted list for years now and yet she never once came close to catching him. No matter how many times she chased him, he always slips through her grasp.
“WHERE IS EVERYONE AT?!” Hope once again yelled in her radio, “I NEED MORE BACKUP, STAT!” Her radio crackled in response. “Hope, when are you going to learn to let that guy go?” “NEVER! I almost got him this time! I just need to close him off!”
Another voice crackles on her radio, albeit more annoyed than the first one: “Chief, aren’t you supposed to be stationed at the Rare Jewelry Exhibit? What are you doing abandoning your post and dragging your entire squad out for a time-wasting chase?”
“It’ll be worth it, I promise!” Hope pleaded, “Besides, McLeach isn’t even driving his usual vehicle this time! I just KNOW I can catch him!” Another voice pops up on the radio, this time from one of Hope’s squadron, “Chief, shouldn’t the mere fact that McLeach is driving a different car stick out like a red flag for us? Are you sure he’s not leading us to a trap?”
“LESS TALKING MORE DRIVING!!”
Hope slams her radio down, now more ticked off and determined than ever to apprehend the runaway poacher. She sticks her head out the window and pulls out her microphone: “END OF THE LINE, MCLEACH! I DON’T KNOW IF YOU’RE TRYING TO GET CAUGHT BUT THIS STOPS NOW!”
Instead of slowing down or even stopping, McLeach proceeds to make a very sharp turn and drives out the opposite direction, leaving Hope and her police squad in the dust. “I AIN’T BEEN CAUGHT YET!” She heard him yell from his unfamiliar vehicle. And right as Hope quickly changes directions to go after him, she could spot his pet monitor lizard peeking out from the car and making faces at her.
The very sight made Hope see red. She was NOT going to lose him again.
With her team on command, Hope hits the gas harder than she ever did before to stay on her criminal’s trail. She follows him back into the city, both barely avoiding bystanders and only treating bumping and running over everything else on the streets as a minor inconvenience.
However, what REALLY drove Hope nuts was how casual McLeach treated the whole thing. He’s being chased! He is driving a different car for no reason and could put him on a higher risk! He KNOWS how much closer he is to getting arrested! So why isn’t he stressed or worried or even a little bit afraid?
Before Hope could think more into it, she realizes McLeach has finally drove himself into what looks like a dead end street. One that was completely blocked and mere miles away from the Rare Jewelry Exhibit. At last! Hope thought, A breakthrough!
The rest of her squadron are quick to surround McLeach, leaving him very little room to escape. Hope could barely contain her excitement as she stumbles out of the car with her microphone in hand. “PERCIVAL MCLEACH, WE HAVE YOU SURROUNDED!!” She bellowed, “STEP OUT OF THE VEHICLE WITH YOUR HANDS IN THE AIR!!” Her policemen did not hesitate to pull out their guns, all ready to fire.
A minute or two passes. Hope waits with baited breath.
Eventually, the car door flies open from McLeach’s hard kick. Joanna exits the car first hissing at the officers as her owner struggles to get out, and Hope now sees why. His arms were full of why she was chasing him to begin with: a pile of exotic animal hides.
“Sorry, Chief!” McLeach apologized nonchalantly, with a tone as if he just arrived late to a lunch date. “I’d put my hands up but as you can see they are pretty full!~”
Hope’s eye twitches at his way too aloof nature. “THIS IS NO LAUGHING MATTER, MCLEACH!!”, She yelled, throwing her microphone on the ground. “You are under arrest! At least take this seriously!” Despite her warnings, McLeach merely chuckles with amusement. “Come on! Can’t a guy have hobbies?”
“I MEAN IT, MCLEACH!! EITHER GET ON THE GROUND OR WE’LL MAKE YOU-” “Yeah, yeah, yeah, get on the ground and escort me to your car.” McLeach offhandedly waves her off, interrupting Hope much to her audacity. “Listen, I would love to go with you and all, but I already have a ride waiting for me. And she will NOT be happy if she saw me riding with another woman~”
“She?”, Hope asked puzzled. “Who’s she?”
As if on cue, the floor started shaking violently like an earthquake. A loud yet very familiar honk is heard from a disturbingly close distance. While the rest of the police squad frantically looked around confused, Hope went pale with horror. She knew exactly what it belonged to.
Like a tiger jumping from the grass to attack its prey, a giant truck leaped out from behind the police in full force, barely giving them enough time to dash out of the way as the truck ran over their police cars and swiftly making a huge spin all over the road. Hope recognized that truck anywhere, it was McLeach’s very own signature bushwhacker.
But before she could make a move, McLeach and Joanna rush towards the bushwhacker and jump into the open passenger seat, crushing his smaller getaway car in the process. For a brief moment, Hope could spot the driver with her sharp eyes. It was none other than Madame Medusa, also a criminal under the chief’s wanted list. She was rumored to be the reason why McLeach was able to move from Australia to New York.
While the chief stared in shock, Medusa makes a sudden turn on the truck after practically destroying every car in the surrounding area, including Hope’s police car that was ran over, and steps on the gas before Hope could get herself or anyone else to chase after them. The chief was near frozen in place, her plan foiled once again and her once neat ponytail now sprung all over in a messy disarray.
As the wanted fugitives left the entire team in the dust, Hope could hear McLeach shouting to her, “SORRY ABOUT YOUR CAR! IF YOU’RE LUCKY THEY WON’T TAKE THAT OUT OF YOUR CHILD SUPPORT BILL!”
~~~~~~~~
“Why are you apologizing to her?”, Medusa asked her partner as they drive away. “YOU owe me a new car, Percival! You should be apologizing to ME for even letting you borrow it!” McLeach rolled his eyes. “What? It’s fun to mess with her, and save the complaining for when we get home, Dusa! Besides, you succeeded in your part, yeah?” Medusa begrudgingly pulls out her large bag of stolen gems. “None of them are as big as the Devil’s Eye but they’re certainly enough to make a fortune.”
McLeach grins, “And that’s all that matters! None of my hides would make us filthy rich like the Golden Eagle would have but it’s enough to let me buy you ten brand new cars, maybe twenty!”
“I’ll make sure you buy yourself a new vehicle too, Percy.”
“Aw, what’s wrong with my pride and joy, Babe?”
“One for casual driving, my dearest.”
“Oh. Dang, you’re right.”
“I’m always right, my beloved~”
~~~~~~~~
By the time Hope and her battered squadron walked back to the exhibit while their ruined cars were towed away, she got a near deafening lash out from her lieutenant for her reckless behavior and impulsive actions. She already had to deal with yet another failed capture of her most wanted outlaws, as if the day could get any worse for her.
“-And while you were gone, WE had to deal with the aftermath of the heist at the exhibit that happened RIGHT under our noses! We could’ve caught the thief if SOMEONE didn’t take every single officer stationed in that building and make them leave their posts just to go after ONE GUY!”
“Wait, heist?” Hope shook out of her daze, “At the exhibit? No, that’s impossible.”
“THE BIGGEST HEIST IN THE EXHIBIT’S HISTORY, CHIEF!!”
“No, that can’t be right! That building was designed to be thief-proof, how could-”
That’s when it hit her.
The chase.
It was on purpose.
McLeach WANTED her to go after him.
He KNEW she would drop everything to get him, and in doing so, leaving the building vulnerable enough for Medusa to use his truck and steal everything inside.
Chief Hope thought she read Percival like a book, that she knows how he thinks and acts, but turns out, HE read her too much as well.
And he played her like a fiddle.
“Uh, Chief? Are you okay?”
Hope ignored her second in command, too shaken with anger to respond, her vision now lava red.
In a fit of fuming rage, Hope grabbed her police hat and throws it on the ground. She growled loudly before lifting her head up to yell at the top of her lungs at skyward:
“PERCIVAL MCLEACHHHHHHH!!!!”
~~~~~~~~
Later that night, two different homes were having dinner.
One was the defeated chief of police eating by herself in a messy, lonely apartment, too caught up in her job and drinks to be with anyone else.
While the other was the celebratory outlaw couple enjoying a nice meal and toasting to their victory, their lovely pets curled up and peaceful after eating their fill.
Hope’s determination was her strength, but it was also her downfall. No matter what she does, it’s never enough for her to feel satisfied, nor can her bad habits fill that void.
Percival meanwhile is basking in his new life. A better home for him and Joanna, a loving partner in Medusa, pulling the right schemes to make them secure. He has never been more satisfied in his life.
And as he makes another toast with Medusa before they share a kiss, he knew he wouldn’t trade it for the world.