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Farkle’s keeping his eye on Riley from across the small, hazy room. It was her idea to come to this Friday night college party, which Farkle was fine with as long as they went together and always knew where the other person was. He doesn’t want either of them to get into any shady situations.
Riley’s currently standing next to some guy who Farkle immediately scoffed at the second he walked up and introduced himself to her. Farkle can already guess what he wants, but he’s going to give him the benefit of the doubt before rushing in to back her up.
Farkle’s sitting on a couch with a girl from his calculus class. They’re talking about nothing in particular when he sees the guy Riley’s talking with move closer to her. Farkle immediately tunes himself in to the conversation, and he’s thankful he did.
“You seem like such a cool girl,” the guy says to Riley with a smile and then continues with a louder voice. “It’s so loud in here, though. It’s really hard to hear. Maybe we can go find a quieter room upstairs to, you know, talk, if you want.”
“Sure. Yeah, definitely,” Riley smiles, failing to notice the difference in his tone.
But Riley doesn’t even get a chance to take a step because Farkle grabs her hand, afraid that she will suddenly disappear with this guy, and warns, “Riley, that doesn’t sound like a good idea.” Riley just stares at him, a little startled by his sudden appearance.
“Maybe your friend here is just jealous because he wouldn’t mind getting you alone, too?” the guy says mockingly to Riley.
Riley’s eyes widen at the bluntness of his words, now understanding what he was interested in. And, thinking she’s answering honestly, she replies with a smirk, “Oh totally, but he would never admit it. I bet he probably thinks about it every day.” Riley playfully hits Farkle’s arm, but Farkle frowns, and with his hand still in hers, he pulls her into the closet a few feet away from them and slams the door. Outside the door, they can hear the muffled voices of the guy and his friends.
“She would have been a waste of time. Seems like she’s got a super possessive boyfriend.”
Farkle cringes at the comment and then looks at Riley. “How dare you,” he says in a controlled but forceful tone. Riley looks up at him in the darkness, confused. She was just flirting a minute ago, and now her best friend is standing in front of her, speaking with a kind of resentment she has never heard from him before. Farkle continues, “If you think I’m the same as all these other boys at this party right now, then you’ve never listened to one thing I’ve ever said to you. Then you really don’t understand how I feel about you and what I would do for you.”
Riley’s mouth is open, but she can only think of one thing to say in return. “Farkle,” she whispers apologetically.
“God, Riley. I wasn’t jealous that some other jerk in this room was going to have a chance at hooking up with you. He was going to use you. Do you really think I’m like that? Do you really see me as some desperate guy who just constantly clings to the opportunity to get in your pants one day? I was trying to make sure you were safe and that someone wasn’t going to take advantage of you.”
“Farkle, I didn’t mean to-”
“And you know what else, Riley? I’m sick of being in this constant state of wondering with you. I’m treating you like a friend, because that’s what we agreed to when we started college. We both had just gotten out of long term relationships and wanted a fresh start here, so we agreed to stay in friendship mode, but then you turn around and so easily joke about us being more with some stranger. I feel like we’re always teetering between this are we or aren’t we situation.”
Riley, getting flustered, challenges, “Are you implying that I’m leading you on?”
Farkle shakes his head out of frustration and admits, “Unintentionally, maybe. Look, when I can feel you staring at me a little longer than a friend would, I can’t tell if that means something. When we’re alone and you put your head on my shoulder, and you do that thing where you nuzzle into my neck,” Farkle stops to close his eyes and breathe, as if the memory of it is just a little too overwhelming, but then continues a second later, “I can’t tell the difference between you being tired and you wanting to be close to me. Sometimes, it just seems like you want me in a way that is more than a friend, and then other times you treat the idea like a total joke. And I don’t know if I can do that anymore. I just don’t think I can do this.”
“What do you mean by this?”
“That’s exactly it, Riley! What is this?”
“It’s you and me. It’s us. That’s all I’ve ever known. What else needs to be understood about that?”
Farkle furrows his brow, because there is too much uncertainty in her words. He says, “We’re stuck somewhere in the middle of two sides. On one end, we could find that stupid, empty room upstairs together and see what happens, but unlike that random guy, I wouldn’t leave you at the end of the night. I would be there in the morning and every morning after that. Or, on the other end, we could just stay down here and talk about respectable, strictly friend-related topics like our student loans and popular juice cleanses.”
She rolls her eyes at him and replies, “It’s not that simple.”
“You either know or you don’t, Riley. Either you want us to be more or not.”
“When did this become so complicated?” Riley asks.
“For me? The moment I met you. The exact second I looked into your eyes for the first time.”
“Stop exaggerating, Farkle.”
“I have always felt something deeper for you. Even at times when I wished I didn’t, it was always there. And I’m not talking about just physically, Riley. I mean, that has definitely crossed my mind more times than I’ll admit, but I’m really talking about us being partners, facing the world together. So if you actually think I am exaggerating, then you seriously are underestimating me and how much I care about you.”
Riley doesn’t immediately say anything in return. She thinks for a few minutes before speaking again.
“Then, let’s try,” she suggests.
“Huh?”
“Let’s give it a shot. Maybe we’re missing out on something great. Let’s start right now, you and me. Forget going upstairs, show me how you feel, right here. I know it’s not just about the physical aspect of all of this, but I also know that I didn’t totally pull those words out of nowhere before. If you want me as more than a friend, then show me.”
“What?” Farkle blurts out.
“Here’s the line,” she says as she waves her arm in between the two of them. “Let’s cross it.” She leans in close, making Farkle back up until he meets the wall of the closet, and she whispers against his lips, “Show me.”
All of the pent up tension leads him to press his lips against hers. Farkle’s thankful for the wall behind him because the way her lips move against his makes his knees buckle and his heart race.
They both pull back from the kiss and Riley is looking so intensely into his eyes. The smile on her face makes it seem like she’s just discovered something new, but for a second Farkle’s terrified that it’s all fake. Her starry eyes, her sunny smile, and god, those lingering stares. But then her voice comes out of the darkness, more confident than before.
“Why can’t we have both sides? Maybe I’ve realized, quite recently, that I want to talk to you about ridiculous diet fads and make out with you in closets. Do you think it’s possible?
She hugs him and presses her face into his neck with a soft chuckle. He lets his head fall back to the wall and laughs, “Definitely.”