Chapter Text
“Are you seriously bringing this up now!?” Tim shrieked over comms.
This is exactly what this night needed, Tim and Jason getting into an argument, yet again.
“Yeah, I am, because Red Robin should be mine, not yours,” Jason shot back. Gunshots could be heard over his side, because apparently it wasn’t embarrassing enough to rehash this debate over the comms where everyone could hear. He just had to air this out to anyone who could listen.
“We’re on patrol, can this wait?” Tim groaned, he was in the middle of fighting a group of muggers who had cornered a girl, he absolutely did not want to deal with Jason’s shit tonight. Tim’s sure that civilians and criminals alike have heard more embarrassing conversations than this, but also he still would rather not be having this discussion right now.
“Nope, not a chance in hell, you’ve copied me with Robin, and then you took Red Robin from me, you cannot keep doing this,” Jason replied. Currently, Jason was dealing with a sizable brawl that had broken out after he broke up a drug deal. Normally Jason would let deals like that slide on his territory, but the shit the dealer was selling was particularly bad, so it couldn’t be ignored. Much to Tim’s displeasure Jason could not care less about how low level thugs thought of him for the stuff he yelled over comms while he was fighting them.
“You let me have Red Robin!?” Tim sputtered out, at an absolute loss for words, because what the hell. Tim absolutely did not have time for this. He hit one of the muggers hard in the shins with his staff, taking them out of the fight, before turning and throwing a batarang at the one charging at him.
“Did I? That doesn’t sound like something I’d do,” Jason said, and Tim could practically hear Jason grinning on the other side, the piece of shit. Jason was shooting at a few of the combatants in the brawl, he wasn’t shooting the kill, just trying to down some of the worst aggressors so he can try to calm this fight down.
“As entertaining as this is, can you two do this later?” Barbara asked, cutting through the two’s squabbling, “or do you want me to put you two in a private channel? Some people are trying to focus.”
“Wait wait wait,” Steph said, wheezing, she had clearly been laughing, “Please put me on their line I need to see who wins.”
“Spoiler.” This was quite possibly one of the worst things to happen to Tim. Not only was Jason making a fool out of them both, but Steph (and probably the other bats too) now have new material to give him shit over later.
Fantastic.
“Look, I’m just saying, Red Robin does have a pattern of taking shit from me,” Jason said.
“Okay I’m putting you three on a private line, Spoiler let me know if they kill each other.” Babs sounded so done with their shit, and unfortunately for her, it will happen again.
Thankfully Tim was able to wrap up the fight he was in pretty quickly, and get away from there before he could make an even bigger fool of himself than he already had. Despite this Jason was still engaged in his fight, but from what Tim could hear over the comms his fight was beginning to wind down.
“Hood don’t take this personally but I’m rooting for Red Robin because I don’t want to owe Nightwing money,” Steph said once the three had been relegated to a private call.
“You guys made bets!?” Tim shrieked yet again, he was going to lose his voice at this rate.
“Oh I’m so wounded,” Jason said, he sounded overly hurt and offended, he was always the type to be overdramatic.
“Hood I hope you die again,” Tim said, running a hand through his hair.
Jason and Steph were silent for a long moment, long enough to make Tim worry if he went too far this time, before Jason started laughing hard.
“Can you wait until I’m not in the middle of a brawl to say shit like that next time?” Jason said, trying to shove down a laugh, he was absolutely not in the time nor place to lose his composure.
“Oh my god?” Steph said, absolutely dumbfounded at the whole situation, at least she wasn’t actively engaged in a fight, or she would’ve stopped dead in her tracks mid combat just to process that.
“Well, if I did die again, you’d probably take Red Hood from me, and we can’t have that,” Jason said after a few moments, having finally wrapped up his engagement.
“Okay so, who won?” Steph asked, “I need to know who owes who money.”
“Me!” Tim and Jason yelled at the same time.
“Oh. I owe Orphan so much money.”
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“For what it’s worth, you weren’t invited,” Kon said, leaning back against his seat, “This was kind of a me and Tim thing.”
“Yeah yeah, but I figured Tim probably couldn’t get shit done while constantly flirting with you,” Jason replied, shrugging.
Tim and Conner had been looking into a case regarding the smuggling of Kryptonite through Gotham. Normally Bruce would take issue with heroes who weren’t from Gotham working in his city, but considering the sheer amount of Kryptonite and the likelihood of Lex being involved an exception was made for the sake of getting this dealt with as soon as possible.
The thing was, Tim had specifically planned around him and Kon being the only two infiltrating the base, and Jason just had to make his life harder, because of course he did. At the very least Jason had butt in before the plan had actually begun to go into motion, but still Tim was on a time crunch to try and get Jason to stay out of this.
“This is a two-person mission,” Tim said, “I don’t have time to rework this plan, as well as plan B if the first one falls through, we only have until tomorrow morning before they start moving again.”
“I’ve seen you make plans under more of a time crunch, at this point you must only be doing this because you don’t like me,” Jason shrugged, sitting down on the floor of the Batcave.
“If I say I don’t would that get you to leave us alone?” Tim asked.
“Not even slightly,” Jason replied.
“You don’t even follow my plans half the time anyways, why should I have to plan around you for a case you aren’t even supposed to be on?” Tim replied, running a hand through his hair. Jason was going to be the death of him. He had actually tried that more than once.
“Because I’m bored and have nothing better to do,” Jason said, a wide grin on his face.
“Can’t you do something with the outlaws, or in crime alley or something other than interfering with what we’re doing?”
“Also, I don’t want to work with someone who tried to kill Tim,” Kon said, he had been abnormally quiet during Tim and Jason’s argument.
“It was one time, let the past be the past,” Jason answered, waving his hand to dismiss Kon’s concerns.
“It literally wasn’t,” Tim sighed, looking at Jason, “Also that’s rich coming from you.”
“Oh yeah, like the time with the shitty Robin costume,” Kon said, “Honestly, I’m pretty sure I’ve seen kids in Halloween costumes that looked better than that.”
If looks could kill the glare from Tim that Kon received would have killed him so much quicker than any amount of kryptonite ever could. Kon knows Tim well enough to know what that look means, so Kon decides, for once in his life, to not push it.
“Jason, you're not going to be a part of this. You’re far too much of a liability, and we don’t have time for your shit,” Tim said, looking at Jason now.
“Nope, I’m coming with and you can’t stop me,” Jason replied.
And they couldn’t, much to Tim’s frustration.