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“Go celebrate” Harvey says to Mike, while accompanying him to the elevator.
“Whoa. Hey, hey. Don’t you mean ‘let’s go celebrate’?” Says Mike, stepping inside.
“Am I really the person you want to celebrate this big murder trial victory with?”
“I don’t know. It depends. Do you put out?” Mike says, smiling lopsidedly.
Being as quick-tongued as he is, the next words scape from his mouth before he can do anything to stop them “Do you wanna find out?”
Mike’s eyes widened for a second. He’s suddenly very still. Uncharacteristically so, like he’s trying really hard to be. And that’s when Harvey realises that maybe he went too far. It’s fine. It’s not like Harvey can’t handle rejection. Ehem. The elevator doors are about to close so this could go both ways. Either Mike let’s them close in Harvey’s face or he stops them. But when Harvey sees that Mike is about to react, it’s already too late.
Well, that sucked.
When Harvey gets off in the first floor, he’s already sobered up, his “I don’t do feelings, nothing can affect me” façade up again. But when he gets out in the streets and is almost halfway into his car, it cracks again a bit.
“Wait! Harvey, wait!” He hears Mike scream.
Harvey gets out of the car and faces him and Mike says “Wanna go somewhere?”
So Harvey moves out of the way and signals Mike to get in the car, surrounding it and getting in on the right side.
They go to Harvey’s favourite bar. Mike is sipping his beer and suddenly Harvey can’t handle the tension anymore. “So, you’re here.”
Mike frowns. “That’s quite the observation, Harvey. You impress me.” He says, mockingly.
Harvey feels his chest tighten. “Okay. You really don’t have somewhere else to be?”
Mike’s smile slips from his eyes and all the way to his mouth. Harvey follows it. And maybe he feels a bit hopeful. Just maybe. “I wanted to celebrate with you.” He says.
Now is Harvey’s turn to frown. “Why?”
“Cause I like being around you.” Mike says, shrugging and taking another sip of his beer.
Harvey doesn’t know what to say, so he says nothing and instead, he takes a sip from his beer, trying to play it cool.
It’s been almost two hours and they are still at the bar, they’ve had a few more beers and have now moved on to tequila shots.
“Okay” Mike says “Let’s play a game. Truth or dare. But with a twist. If we don’t want to answer or don’t want to do the dare, we have to drink.” He’s smiling loosely, Harvey mirroring him. They are both in that state where everything feels like an incredibly good idea so Harvey says “Perfect!”
What could go wrong?
Mike claps his hands together. “All right! Let’s do this! I’ll start. Truth or dare?”
“Hm. Truth.”
Mike smiles, mischievously. “Is your middle name really Reginald?”
Harvey snorts “Yeah.”
Mike winces “Oh, that’s terrible, I’m sorry.”
“Fuck off.” Harvey says, but they are both laughing. “Okay, my turn. Truth or dare?”
“Truth.” Mike says.
Harvey thinks about it for a second “Let’s see” he puts his hand in his chin theatrically “oh, I got one, did you really enjoy working with Louis?¨ Mike laughs, loud, which makes Harvey smile even more. “Remember, you have to tell me the truth.”
“I did! I don’t know why it’s so hard for you to believe!” Harvey lifts an eyebrow. “Okay, I do know why it is so hard for you to believe, but we had fun, we discovered we had some things in common.”
Harvey feigns disgusts so Mike says “Don’t make that face, he’s not all that bad.”
“Whatever” Harvey says, still smiling.
Mike says “Truth or dare?”
Harvey, still apprehensive, and honestly a bit scared to find out what could Mike dare him to do, decides to keep playing it safe (which goes against everything that Harvey is, except when it comes to Mike) and says “Truth”.
Mike has suddenly gone a bit serious “Did you really want me to have someone else to celebrate with?”
Harvey tries, and fails, to keep a poker face and matching Mike’s serious expression says “No.”
They play a few more rounds of truth, and then, when it’s Harvey’s turn again and Mike asks “Truth or dare?”
Harvey, feeling a bit more brave, says “Dare.”
In a heartbeat Mike says “I dare you to kiss me.”
Now it’s Harvey’s turn to very intently try, considering the alcohol levels that are currently in his blood, to keep still and not fall off the stool. He watches Mike’s expression very closely, reading it, looking for signs that he’s not serious, that he’s joking, that he’s gonna say ‘ha, got you!’ in the next second, but the proof he’s looking for is not there, instead what he identifies is hopefulness? Harvey thinks he can read Mike pretty well, after all these years. He thinks he’s not wrong. He hopes he’s not wrong.
Harvey shakes his head “No. Not like this.” So he takes the glass and drinks his tequila shot.
Mikes mouth is hanging slightly open while Harvey takes out his wallet, puts some bills on top of the table and says “Good night, Mike. I’ll see you tomorrow.” He stands up and leaves without looking back.
The firm is pretty quiet the next morning in comparison to the last few weeks, and since Harvey is not as busy he has (purposefully) not gone to the bullpen looking for Mike, the same way that Mike (probabbly also purposefully) has yet to appear in Harvey’s office eagerly looking for something to do. So, looks like they’ve been actively avoiding each other. Good to know. Just as Harvey is dismissing this thought someone knocks on his door.
“Where’s Mike?” Donna asks, coming in.
Harvey looks up at her “How would I know?”
Donna rises an eyebrow “It’s kinda your job.”
Harvey scoffs “My job is not to babysit him.”
Donna half-laughs “Since when?”
Mike has been racking his brain since last night, he has barely slept and he could've gone home already but he's still in his cubicle waiting for… No. This is stupid, Harvey is not the kind of man that holds back when he wants something, he is intense, he gives his everything, he is ferocious, but when they seem to start to go somewhere, he shuts down, retreats, like he feels he is overstepping, like he's not welcome, as if Mike would even doubt to go anywhere with him, do anything with him. Mike stops spiralling when he catches someone’s figure in his peripheral vision.
It’s almost half past six when Harvey decides that his day is over. So before heading to the elevator to go home he goes to take a look at the bullpen. Of course, Mike’s there, with his earphones plugged in and waving his pen at the rhythm of whatever music he’s listening to. Harvey feels a wave of a warm feeling that makes him a bit dizzy and cracks a private smile. He steps into the room and stops in front of Mike’s cubicle.
“Hey” Harvey says.
“Hi” Mike answers, stoping his music.
“I haven’t seen you all day, are you okay?”
Mike touches the back of his head and simply says “Yeah, I was just busy, sorry”
“Okay, just thought I'd check up on you” He says, trying to dismiss the feeling rising up his throat, averting his eyes to not look at Mike.
Mike looks at him like Harvey is a riddle that gets harder to decipher every day that passes, “I’m fine.”
“Okay” Harvey says, and turns around to leave. And, maybe not so surprisingly, Mike says the same thing, again, in less that 24 hours “Wait.”
So Harvey stops and watches him pick up his stuff, turn off his computer, hang his bag on his shoulder and pick up his jacket from his chair. “Wanna grab a beer?”
“I was thinking on spending the rest of the night at home, actually”
Mike looks kind of defeated so Harvey offers "If you wanna join" To which Mike smiles and says, “Sounds great.”
So when they get to Harvey’s condo they change into some comfortable clothes (Harvey gives Mike a t-shirt and a tracksuit, to which Mike, in awe, says "I didn’t know you even knew what these were", to which Harvey answered "You can keep your suit pant on", so Mike laughed and took the pants from Harveys hand).
“What were you thinking on making?” Mike asks, sitting on one of the stools of Harvey’s kitchen isle.
“Nothing in particular, why?” Harvey answers, rummaging through the fridge.
“Can I... cook for you?” Mike asks, tentatively.
Harvey turns to face him “I didn’t know you knew how to.”
Mike smiles and gets up “I guess there’s stuff we still don’t know about each other.”
So while Mike cooks, Harvey gets two beers and passes one to Mike and then goes to set the table. When he’s done, he sits on the couch and puts on the TV, scrolling through the channels, not deciding on anything and leaving some repetition of some sitcom on, just for the background noise. And then, he turns to look at Mike. He has his back to Harvey so he can indulge himself for a bit, he has an spatula on his hand and a towel on his shoulder. And Harvey can’t help but think how okay he is with that image. Mike. In his kitchen. Cooking for both of them. Can’t help but think that he wouldn’t mind at all that this became his usual view, them coming home together after work, changing into comfortable clothes, cooking and having dinner together, going to bed together... He’s so into his own train of self-destructive thought that he half jumps when he hears Mike say, “Staring.”
Harvey’s sight focuses again and he can see that Mike is still not facing him, “How the hell-”
“I can feel it, Harvey, you’re not the only one who looks when you think the other one isn’t.”
So Harvey turns to the TV again, and waits for Mike to be done.
They eat in a comfortable silence, Harvey compliments Mike’s culinary gifts with an “Is there something you don’t know how to do?” to which Mike blushes. And they continue talking about random things until they are done.
“Mike, that was delicious, I may also have to hire you to be my personal cook.” Harvey says, grinning.
Suddenly Mike asks “What did you mean?” So Harvey rises his head to look at the somber expression that he’s suddenly wearing.
“What do you mean ‘what did I mean’?”
“Yesterday.”
Harvey rubs a hand through his face “Nothing, it didn’t mean-”
“Didn’t it? So why did you avoid me today?”
Harvey sighs “I didn’t avoid you.”
Mike arches an eyebrow, meaning Really? but says nothing.
“Well, is not like you were eagerly looking for me either!”
“I told you! I was busy.”
Now it’s Harvey’s turn to raise an eyebrow.
“Okay” Mike says, surrendering, “I asked you a question, though.”
“And I answered.” Harvey says, defensively.
“Harvey, don’t lawyer me. I’m not accusing you of anything, I just wanna talk.”
Harvey can feel the tension building in every single one of his muscles. This conversation is taking a turn that he doesn’t know if he’s ready to visit. He has feelings for Mike. Has for a long time. But when he thinks Mike can reciprocate them, something makes him falter. He doesn’t know if it’s because the enormity of his feelings makes him see things where there’s nothing, like when they are walking together down the street and Mike continues to get closer to Harvey’s side until their shoulders bump together all the time. Or when Mike hands Harvey some paperwork and their hands touch, but Mike’s doesn’t withdraw for a few seconds too long. Or that time when they shared that stupid star-shaped pineapple in his office. But then, Mike also does things like hit on the barista that gives him his coffee in the mornings. And at the end of the day Harvey thinks that really, it’s all in his head, and he goes to bed thinking that he will stop trying to look for a double-meaning in all that Mike does. And then, the next day, he does it all over again.
So he simply says “I’m just confused.”
“About what?”
“About you.” He says looking straight into Mike’s eyes.
“What do you mean?” Mike says, confused.
“I can’t tell what you want.”
“Can’t you? I’ve already told you.”
Harvey's mind conjures up the "I dare you to kiss me" from last night, but he still can’t believe his luck so he dismisses it. Again. But this time is kind of a full-blown confession so it only gets halfway buried in his brain.
“Mike, please.”
“What?”
“Don’t.” And with that, he gets up to put the plates in the sink.
“I thought you wanted this.” Mike says, getting up.
Harvey has his arms spread in the kitchen sink, with his head hanging low. He can feel Mike getting closer, but can’t get himself to look at him. Can’t get himself to look at him when he says “I want it too much”.
So he can’t see Mike’s surprised expression, followed by a hint of happiness that rapidly changes into a frown, confusion. “Then what’s the problem?”
He then turns to face Mike, who is closer than he anticipated. “I’m confused.” Harvey repeats.
“I thought I made what I wanted pretty clear last night.”
Harvey scoffs, “As if. What about that barista? The one that always smiles at you? She even wrote her phone number on your cup.” Mike laughs, wholeheartedly. So Harvey counters with “And Rachel? I’ve seen the way you look at her."
At this, Mike stops smiling and with a very serious face says “Have you seen the way I look at you?”
Harvey takes a step back, but doesn’t say anything, so Mike continues, “I’m not gonna deny that I haven’t looked at Rachel in the past, but I have also seen you look at Donna, Harvey. Or at Scottie, for that matter. Attractive people are a thing, Harvey, that doesn’t mean I have the same feelings for them as I have for you.”
And with that statement Harvey can't ignore it anymore. The feelings that he has been bottling up suddenly burst through every pore of his body, so he closes the little distance that was between the two of them and kisses Mike like he has been wanting to do since yesterday, like he has been wanting to do for months. And when they pause to catch their breath Harvey says, very quietly, “I meant something like that.”