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The air was buzzing with the sounds of a 90’s Ministry garden party, jazz fusion playing from hidden speakers, the clinking of champagne flutes, and the distant, dry laughter of Sister Imperator.
Copia and Perpetua, were dressed in matching black velvet suits that they both hated. They had escaped the formal reception, they were on a mission to find the secret stash of imported European chocolates that Terzo had hidden from them.
“We haven’t looked in the West Library, yet.” Copia whispered, his face a mask of intense, ten year old focus. “It’s probably behind the volumes of Historical Sacrifices, thinking he is so smart.”
“He is twenty now, Cope.” Perpetua noted, moving with his usual silent, predatory grace. “He thinks he’s an adult. Adults always hide the best stuff in the most obvious places.”
They reached the heavy oak doors of the West Library. They didn’t knock, they were Ministry royalty, and the Ministry was their playground. They pushed the doors open just a crack and slipped inside.
They didn’t find the chocolates. Instead, they found Terzo.
He was on one of the velvet chairs, and he wasn’t alone. A young pretty woman sat in his lap. Their mouths connected in a passionate kiss, and the hands were roaming.
The twins stopped dead. Their eyes went wide as saucers.
“Oh… oh no.” Copia said, letting out a tiny, high pitched gasp that sounded like a deflating balloon.
Perpetua’s jaw dropped, his hand shooting out to grab onto Copia. “Terzo… what… ew! Do you know how many germs are in a single human mouth?! It’s like a swamp in there!”
The woman let out a startled shriek, nearly toppling off Terzo’s lap as she scrambled to adjust her dress. Terzo, however, didn't scramble. He leaned back against the plush velvet of the chair, his hair a magnificent disaster of hairsprayed curls and his silk shirt undone just enough to be scandalous.
He looked at his ten-year-old brothers with a lazy, half-lidded amusement, the adrenaline of the moment fueling a wicked grin.
"Swamp bacteria?" Terzo chuckled, his voice sounding deeper and smoother than the twins remembered. "Honestly, Perpetua, you have the soul of a tax auditor. And Copia... you look like you’ve just seen a ghost. It’s just a kiss."
“A kiss?! You looked like you were trying to eat her!” Copia practically shouted, “and why were you touching her boob?”
Perpetua looked absolutely disgusted as he looked at his older brother.
“I’m never going to recover from this,” Perpetua mumbled, “this is going to be burned into my brain forever…”
“I can feel the yuck in my very bones! We’re never going to survive the night!” Copia wailed dramatically as he clutched his twins jacket.
Terzo finally pushed himself up from the chair, a playful glint in his eyes as he smoothed his hair back. “You two are more dramatic than a funeral in the rain. You’ll understand one day.”
The twins looked at each other, their faces scrunched up in complete distaste.
“Absolutely not! I will not be eating someone’s face like that… or touching.” Copia protested, crossing his arms over his chest.
Terzo reached into the secret compartment of a globe bar near the desk, pulling out a hidden box of dark, gold wrapped Belgian truffles. The ones the twins had been looking for. He tossed them towards the boys, Perpetua caught them with a silent, practiced snap of his hands.
“Take those, and disappear my little ravens,” He said with a smirk, “I highly doubt you’re going to want to stay for the next part.”
Their eyes widened, “no, no, no… you’re not!” Copia said, his voice too high.
“Consider that a bribe to keep your mouths shut.” Terzo shooed the children out and locked the door behind them. “Now where were we?” He said, as his voice dropped to a smooth low hum.
The twins fled down the hall, their bribe tucked tightly under Perpetua’s arm. They didn’t return back to the party, they ran to their room. Copia slammed the door shut and turned to his brother.
“Why would he ever want to do that!” He questioned as he flopped down on his bed.
“Because he is awful… he is… horrible,” Perpetua replied, joining his twin.
“At least we got the chocolates,” Copia offered with a smile, “so… maybe it's not that bad…”
Perpetua looked at him with a flat expression, “we’re scarred for life, Cope. I will never unsee those hands.”
Copia opened the box of chocolates and stuffed two truffles into his mouth. “Ew, Pet. Don’t mention that!”
The breakfast room was flooded with California sun, smelling of fresh espresso and the rosemary growing outside the windows. Sister Imperator sat at the head of the table, her face hidden behind the morning’s financial reports, though the occasional twitch of the paper suggested she was more attentive than she appeared.
Secondo was meticulously organizing his planner, while Primo was staring into his coffee as if searching for the meaning of life in the crema.
Terzo strolled in late, his silk robe fluttering, looking remarkably pleased with himself. "Good morning, family," he chirped, reaching for the silver tongs to grab a croissant. "Beautiful day for the Ministry to shine, isn't it?"
The twins, sitting side-by-side, stopped mid-chew. They turned their heads in perfect unison, their eyes locking onto Terzo’s right hand.
"He’s using the tongs, Pet. Do you think it’s because he knows? The... contamination?" Copia whispered so loudly that the entire room heard.
Perpetua was still looking at Terzo’s hand. "It’s a wise choice. If I were him, I’d never touch communal food again. I’d wear gloves. Leather ones. Up to the elbow."
Terzo’s hand faltered for a second. He gripped the tongs tighter, his smile stiffening. He knew exactly what they were referring to. "It’s just a croissant, boys. Don't be weird."
"We saw the hands, Terzo. We saw where they roamed." Copia replied, curling his lip in distaste.
Secondo looked up sharply, his pen hovering over his planner. "Roamed? Terzo, did you leave the Ministry last night? I checked the logs at midnight and your car was accounted for."
“I didn't leave the Ministry, Secondo. I was in the library. Studying." Terzo replied, as nonchalantly as he could.
"He was studying 'The Anatomy of the Swamp.' It was a very... hands-on lecture." Perpetua commented dryly.
"Do you think he washed them, Primo? Or are they still... sticky with sin?" Copia leaned towards Primo, who was doing his best to stay out of the conversation.
The word sin acted like a physical trigger for Secondo. He slammed his planner shut, his eyes narrowing behind his spectacles. "Sin? What sin? Terzo, did you break a ritual seal? Did you interfere with the consecrated oils? If there is stickiness involved in a spiritual violation, I need to know the viscosity immediately for the report."
Terzo looked like he wanted to swallow his own tongue. "There is no viscosity, Secondo! It was a metaphor! They’re just being children!" Terzo was beginning to turn red, he shot a murderous look at the twins.
Sister Imperator lowered her paper just enough to reveal eyes that were dancing with amusement. She had seen Terzo slip into the West Library with the daughter of a prominent donor, and she had seen two small black-velvet shadows following him ten minutes later.
"The boys are simply concerned with hygiene, Secondo," Sister Imperator said, her voice smooth and dangerous. "And Terzo... I do hope your studies in the library were productive. I’d hate to think you were wasting your twentieth year on... unrecorded rituals."
Terzo cleared his throat, quickly sitting down and hiding his hands under the table. "Productive. Very. I learned a lot about... historical sacrifices."
Copia grinned, his mouth full of strawberry jam. "The sacrifice of his dignity!"
Perpetua nodded. "And the sanctity of the West Wing bookshelves."
Secondo began a lecture on the proper cleaning of library mahogany, entirely missing the point, while Terzo spent the rest of the meal staring at his plate, refusing to touch anything with his hands.