Work Text:
When George's alarm beeped, he groggily pressed buttons on his phone, his mind more than a little bit asleep. He lay in bed, definitely too tired to get up right now, but he felt himself drift back into sleep and pulled out his phone as a way to wake up his mind and fried attention span, "drivers are iPad kids", he once heard Alex Albon say. So he played a simple game, not willing to scroll on social media and possibly see hate this early in the morning. The colourful blocks slid into their spots so well, he wondered if humans were like that too. Did they have a spot? Was he in the right one? It felt good, but not perfect. Something was missing in his life, despite having a really fun and well-paying job. He came to the decision that his dopamine hit was good enough, and climbed out of bed to go to the bathroom.
The bathroom door closed behind him, and he sat on the floor just to pull out his phone again and this time use Instagram. The first thing that showed up was a picture of two faces, Alex and Lily. They were smiling so brightly and beautifully, then he saw the dazzling ring on Lily's finger and his stomach dropped a million feet. His vision went dazed and unfocused, not from tears but from shock and disbelief. Then he felt an uncontrollable wave of happiness for them and thought about how perfect they were together, they were an amazing fit.
His mind was spinning, everything with Alex would never be the same again, but they were really good for each other and all they deserved was someone like the other who could love them.
But there was always something there, there were small things, like glances and smiles, and there were more clear signs, like kisses between Alex and George. Alex had never explicitly cheated on Lily, George knew that they truly loved one another and would never even consider cheating, but he and Alex had something too. It was never said, only in between the lines. They did things couples did, holding hands, making out, cuddling, sharing beds. But it hadn’t been enough to satisfy either, they could never really be a pair.
George stared at his screen for several minutes, letting the knife sink deeper into his skin while his head spiralled. However, he always knew this was coming, hadn’t he? It was obvious that he and Alex would never date, and certainly never get married. It would have been basically impossible in the world of F1 to be gay, since they were in so many countries that were not supportive of the LGBT community.
Eventually, he got his shit together and told his brain to tap his screen, opening the comments. Everyone was so happy, Alex and Lily were one of the most loved F1 couples. Even Oscar Piastri, who tended to text really dryly, said “Congrats!!”, so the bar was slightly high for him to say something. He sided with just liking the post, because he was truly happy for them and that was the best part.
He texted Alex privately with some funny congratulatory slop that would only be acceptable when texting him as his best friend, and set his phone down.
Everything hit him at once, and he just sat on the floor with his back to the wall, curled up with his head in his arms.
All the memories of him and Alex in the slightest romantic light ever hit him and he let the sadness and almost grief like emotion flood over him, knowing that this feeling was inevitable and it was better to get it over with alone than ever.
He missed Alex so badly, everything he ever missed in life was someone who was really and truly *his*, they were each other’s number one person in the world and would always be there for the other, and Alex was as close as that as he ever got and might ever get. His phone buzzed and, yes, it was a message from the one who occupied his mind all the time - Alex.
Alex:
yeah man it will be wild
George:
It’ll be easier if you name a child after me
[wink emoji]
Alex:
haha, yes, little baby georgerussell albon muni he. sounds beautiful.
George:
Or you could name them all after me?
Alex:
geez man i don’t know if we’re even gonna have any kids forget that many kids
we can name them after you
at least a middle name
George:
Maybe you can name your next pet after me?
Alex:
maybe if you settle down with someone you can name your house after me?
George:
Fair deal.
Alex:
alright then, time to go get the most annoying animal ever and name them george. or georgerussell. or georgewilliamrussell
George:
Just bought a shack! Time to name it Alex.
Also how tf do you know my middle name
Alex:
we should have a party in your shack
wait
wanna go out for dinner sometime next week
are you free
George:
You know what’s free?
Lobster pasta place.
You still owe me
Alex:
i mean, we could go. when r u free next week?
George:
Most days, really, after five or so.
Alex:
same, i guess?
sooo
sunday?
that’s the day you were born on [wink emoji]
George:
[scared emoji]
HOW TF DO YOU KNOW THIS. FIRST MY MIDDLE NAME, NOW THE DAY OF THE WEEK I WAS BORN ON.
Wait like
I know this about you too mate.
Alexander Phillippe Albon I can’t spell your very last name but you do have another.
Born on Saturday, March 23, 1996
Alex:
how did we even learn this about each other
do i avidly stalk your wikipedia page
do you avidly stalk my wikipedia page
ok soooo
dinner on sunday?
George:
Sounds great, how’s seven pm?
Alex:
good. see you there, if we don’t talk sooner.
George put the phone down, thinking of Alex and their unusually close bond. Yes, there was some extreme romantic tension or actions at times, but they were really the other’s closest friend.
He got up off the bathroom floor, that sure as hell wasn't helping his mood, and sat at the kitchen countertop with bread currently in the toaster. He pulled out his phone and wrote messages to Alex that he'd never send.
'Man, please don't be a stranger. Love Lily, never ever stop, but please stay. You're so dear to me, dare I say my first love, and I know you'll never read this but I already miss the idea of us never having a thing again, can you just appreciate us as a relationship, not even romantic, but I will always, always be here for you no matter what. Can we still be best friends? You're in my best memories and will never be replaced by anyone else. I hope you and Lily have a beautiful life together and I truly wish you two the best in life, the very best. I'm always waiting, just in case. Goodbye, the Alex Albon I loved. The world will never know you. Don't be a stranger.'