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Hunter was bolting out of the door before anyone can even get a word in to comfort him. Not that it would have made a difference, Luz was certain. A family — yes, family — of criminals is not the group that Hunter would want trying to talk him down from a panic attack. It’s a valid reason to freak out. His entire world must be collapsing around him. Luz recalls this feeling from when her dad died. One of the most important people in her life just vanished. One moment, he was holding her hand. The next, she was being pulled out of the room by a nurse as the doctors attempted to resuscitate him.
However, Luz reminded herself that she knew for certain her father was a good person. He wasn’t around any longer, but he was kind and generous and cherishing of her and her mom.
Hunter didn’t have that closure.
Maybe he felt like his Uncle Belos had died and all that remained was the cruel, twisted emperor. Maybe that’s what he was telling himself as a false comfort. Maybe he wanted to cling onto the idea that his love and devotion to the emperor wasn’t a forgery of centuries of lying.
Though all these thoughts had the time to pass through Luz’s head before she could instruct her body to react to Hunter’s sudden escape, she was on her feet only seconds after he was, sprinting after him through the front door, past the cape he’d left on the floor.
”Hunter!” She yelled after him, willing the tears that stung her eyes to disappear. Her legs stilled only a few feet away from the Owl House. Why her body refused to pursue Hunter, Luz didn’t know, but she felt nauseous with worry as she watched him disappear within the trees.
Eda and King had stepped outside, too. Eda was approaching Luz, a hand outstretched and her voice in that tone that was so gentle yet concerned. She sounded like Luz’s mom.
Luz wanted her mom.
For a brief moment, Luz glanced back at Eda. She would understand. Eda was all too familiar with how persistent Luz was when it came to taking care of her friends. Even her enemies.
She took off into the forest. Eda didn’t stop her.
—
Run. Run. Hide. Run. They’re coming. Faster. Hide.
Hunter should be faster than this. In all his coven scout training, he’d been the most athletic, most agile, most stealthy. Now, he felt anything but. Maybe it was something to do with the burning in his chest that refused to let him breathe. He’d dealt with this before, but never this extreme. It wasn’t terribly rare for him to hide in his room after a mission until his minor lapse in breathing had passed before returning to his duties.
He was convinced everyone suffered the same experience that he often did. Now, as he collapsed behind a bush, he wondered if anyone else ever felt it this extremely. He clutched his chest with one hand and covered his mouth with the other, like one quiet whimper might give him away. He was breathing harshly through his nose, scrunching his eyes shut as he thought over what awful fate could possibly await him when he was caught by the coven scouts and brought before the emperor.
He couldn’t help but think back to that graveyard in Belos’s mind. All those previous guards, dead. He felt as though he was walking their very footsteps to his own execution. Maybe his grave had already been dug out in the mindscape. Hunter seemed to have a habit of putting himself in graves.
It was poetic, he considered. He was basically born out of the grave. Unlike every single other living creature on the Boiling Isles, Hunter was not conceived or birthed or even looked upon for a moment by a mother and father who created him out of love. No. He was spare parts grown together to replace some old friend Belos had.
Hunter’s skin no longer felt like his own. He clawed at his arms and let out a soft sob. Crying? How pathetic. He wipes the tears away in frustration and punches the ground of the forest he’d found himself in. Looking about the trees, he realised he was probably more like them than he was any witch or even human. It was almost laughable.
His train of thought is instantly snapped like a twig. Probably because he heard the snapping of a twig mere feet away from where he was hiding. He couldn’t see himself, but he knew his eyes must be open so wide in terror that it might be covering his eyebags as he became aware of the approaching footsteps. He flinched as he heard his name.
”Hunter?”
No. Not Luz. She was the one who got him into this mess. If she had just left him alone and not sucked him into Belos’s mind with her then—
Then nothing. The emperor would still be evil. He would just be blissfully unaware as he always was.
Was he bad for wishing that was still true?
”Hunter, I can hear you breathing.”
He stopped breathing.
The footsteps paused and Hunter swore he could hear Luz sigh.
”Don’t suffocate yourself. Come on, Hunter. Can we talk?”
Hunter suddenly felt embarrassed for holding his breath when Luz had clearly already located him. Despite that, the fear coursing through Hunter’s veins (or roots, more like. He doubted grimwalkers had veins) had tensed his muscles too much to allow him to move.
Out of the corner of his eye, he spotted movement. He didn’t move, though. He couldn’t move. Even when Luz’s silhouette emerged from the trees, he remained frozen. Even when she crouched down beside him. He remained with his knees drawn to his chest as he attempted to contain his sobs. He wanted Luz to go away. He was vulnerable, and Luz could completely take advantage of him. She could kill him and he would be too busy crying to fight back. She’d be doing the world a favor, too. He was a monster and he knew it.
”I’m scared too.”
What?
Hunter’s body must have reacted in some way, because he felt the leaves shift under him and he noticed Luz’s eyes flicker back towards him before she continued.
”I’m scared because all my friends are in danger. I’m scared I’ll never see my mom again. I’m scared that people will find out that—” She stopped. Hunter knew what she was going to say. He had heard that she’d unknowingly helped Belos in the past. That didn’t make her a bad person, though. That was an accident. Hunter had been serving this witch hunter his whole life and never once suspected that he was anything but pure of heart.
After another few seconds of Hunter not saying anything, Luz turned to him. “What I’m saying is that it’s okay to be scared. It just helps to talk about it, y’know?” She went quiet again, like she knew Hunter wasn’t going to respond.
Hunter tried to zone out. He didn’t know why Luz was saying these things, but they made his stomach feel strange and, if anything, he only felt more vulnerable. He didn’t like that. What he did like was the fact that his breaths seemed to come a tiny bit easier. He wasn’t sure why. Maybe the air was becoming clearer. His eyes flickered in Luz’s direction before settling on the ground again.
”…h-he’s g-g-gonna… k-kill me…” He whispered. His voice was so small. So shaky. He hated it so much. His breaths picked up in speed again, like he was trying to re-inhale the words before Luz could hear them. She probably thought he was so weak and worthless.
He probably was.
However, instead of confirming his self-deprecation, Luz shifted closer to him. “I won’t let him.”
Those words made Hunter choke out a sob. He quickly covered his mouth again, but it was too late. The tears were pouring, his breath was hitching and his brain was overloading. His sobs were loud and painful, like he was letting years of fear and misery explode out of him in one giant breakdown.
He didn’t realise Luz was holding him until his sobs had died down, and that wasn’t for a full minute. He seemed to like the feeling of being held. Realistically, Luz alone wasn’t going to protect him from the wrath of the emperor, but he sure felt like she could. He wasn’t fully sure what being safe felt like, but it definitely felt something like this. It was stupid, he knew that, but somehow this human that had been nothing short of irritating since he'd met her was providing him more comfort than he'd felt from the emperor in a lifetime.
—
Luz didn’t expect Hunter to let her hug him like this. He was a very defensive person that clearly hated affection, but now he was clinging to her like she was keeping him from drifting off into space. As the boy bawled into her shoulder, she wiped his tears with her thumb, just like her mamá always did for her.
“I-I d-don’t w-w-wanna d-die..!” He confessed through heart-wrenching cries, like he was begging her to save him. Maybe he was.
”You’re not gonna die…” Luz whispered, knowing it was true. She wouldn’t let the emperor hurt Hunter like this ever again if it killed her.
It took a long time for Luz to feel that Hunter had calmed down enough her get to make her offer. “Hunter? Would you like to come back to the Owl House with me?” She asked in such a patient tone.
Luz couldn’t force Hunter to stay at the Owl House, but she couldn’t help but think that he didn’t exactly have a choice. Despite that, she still felt a pang of anxiety with his long it was taking him to decide. Eventually, his head bobbed only slightly once in confirmation. Luz smiled very faintly as she stood up, offering a hand to Hunter as she did.
He took her hand, but released it as soon as he was on his feet. Each step was shaky, but Luz walked alongside him like nothing was wrong. That always made her feel better when she was having bad anxiety. Subtle reminders that she was normal. She wasn’t fragile. Neither was Hunter.
On several occasions, Hunter stumbled and almost fell, but Luz's grip on him kept him upright every time. He was like a baby deer stumbling through the woods, and Luz imagined that if the ex-Golden Guard wasn't already overwhelmed with anxiety, confusion and betrayal, he'd be utterly embarrassed. Perhaps during the night he'd calm down and realise how defenceless he'd been acting, startling him into running away again. Luz willed her prediction to be false, because she couldn't stand the idea of Hunter being so traumatised that he'd be hesitant to trust even her.
That was a stupid thing to think. Hunter had always been in complete denial that Luz was trying to help him. Why would now be any different? So what his whole world was turning upside down, his trust issues were cemented in place.
Luz wondered if there was therapy in the Boiling Isles. She wondered even more if Hunter would accept going to it.
—
The walk back to the Owl House wasn’t as far as he remembered running. Maybe it felt like further in his head. Maybe he hadn’t been running at all and he’d simply been so wrapped up in his own racing thoughts that he hadn’t registered that his body wasn’t moving at the same pace. All these maybes and no answers were starting to drive him insane. More insane than he already was.
Hunter felt like a zombie as Luz guided him back through the front door of the house and into the living room. He glanced at his discarded cloak and tried not to gag. It was hard not to feel sick upon realising he had basically been involved in a cult for sixteen years.
He averted his eyes to the Owl Lady, specifically her shoes because he was too afraid to meet her eyes. She seemed to understand his apprehension, but handed him a mug of what smelled like cocoa anyway. Hunter was grateful, even if he didn’t say a word as he was guided by Luz upstairs. He stared at the liquid. Twelve hours ago, he would have never excepted a beverage from a convicted criminal, but now it felt safer than anything he'd been given in the confines of the castle. The idea sent a shiver down his spine, which he quickly quelled by taking a large gulp of the liquid, savouring in its taste and the way it burned his throat. The burning was better than the bitter coldness he'd received his whole life up until now.
Something was wrong with him.
The Owl House was just as quirky as he thought it’d be, but he liked it more than he anticipated. He gazed upon every wall, surface and door, admiring how much more character it had compared to the castle, which was barren and soulless. Like the emperor, he supposed. Wanted posters were hung like achievements, and illegal magic artefacts were on display with little-to-no protection despite Hunter being certain that majority of them could easily cause serious damage if it were to slip off the shelf one day.
Luz was standing by a door at the end of the hallway, watching Hunter take it all in. She'd been nothing but composed throughout Hunter's whole spiral, always taking it slow. She must have understood quickly that Hunter didn't adapt well to new things. He caught her gaze and nodded a little, signalling he was done surveying the hallway, and she pushed open the door before her. Inside was a room full of old junk that looked like it belonged at a yard sale, but in the middle of the room there was a sleeping bag surrounded by Luz-esque items. A fantasy novel, a nightlight, an otter plushie. It made Hunter’s heart warm a little to see it.
“Y-your room?” He asked in a quiet voice. Luz nodded, glancing back at him.
”Yours too, now.” She smiled the tiniest smile as she picked up a bundle of blankets and pillows, handing them to Hunter. He stared at the soft items in his arms and willed himself to not tear up again. He simply nodded once and began to set up his makeshift bed.
As he arranged the cushions into a mattress, he pondered over whether the Owl Lady had another room in the house to sleep in and if Luz just wanted to make sure he wasn’t alone when he slept. He wasn’t ungrateful, obviously. If anything, he was so happy that he wouldn’t be alone. Had Luz suggested he go in a separate room in a stranger's house when he knows the entire emperor's coven must be after him, he would have outright refused. Actually, he probably wouldn't have. He would probably have curled up in the corner of the room, too afraid of the nightmares to even consider sleeping, but he also didn't want to bother Luz and the Owl Lady after they'd given him their hospitality. Regardless, he was able to breathe a little calmer knowing that someone else was in the room with him.
He didn’t want to be alone.
Looking over at Luz as he tucked himself into the blanket, he thought to himself that maybe he wasn’t going to be alone forever.
Or maybe the emperor was going to kill everyone he knew just to make sure he was always alone.
But he wasn’t alone. Not since the kind and irritably persistent human girl had saved him from the emperor. Come to think of it, he hadn’t thanked her.
”…L-Luz?”
”Yeah?” She called softly from her sleeping bag.
He froze. “Nothing.” He said quickly, then internally hit his forehead.
Luz seemed confused, but let it go. “Goodnight Hunter.”
Hunter wiped his eyes and murmured goodnight in return. It wasn’t until he was moments away from nodding off that he murmured. “Thank you."