Work Text:
Let’s be honest, mixing work and personal feelings is a bad idea. Everyone knows it. Catching feelings for a coworker, whether it is your teammate or your boss, almost never ends well. Most of the time it happens just because you spend too many hours in the same place, day after day, until your brain starts confusing comfort with something more.
Lando knew that. It did not stop him.
He had been carrying these feelings for years, and they both kept him going and slowly tore him apart. The thoughts followed him everywhere. In the shower. At work. Late at night when he stared at the ceiling instead of sleeping. It was always Oscar. Always. He was painfully, hopelessly obsessed.
Sometimes it felt mutual. And when they talked, when they laughed, when Oscar leaned just a little closer than necessary, Lando let himself flirt. Soft at first, then bolder, half-joking, half-serious. He did not even care anymore if other people noticed. And Oscar always responded, smiling, playing along, like it meant something.
But it never went anywhere. Never past work, never past shared jokes and long looks. And that was what hurt the most, the quiet fear that maybe all of it only existed in Lando’s head.
Sometimes Lando tried to remember when it all started. Because in the beginning, he really had not thought much of Oscar at all. Just another teammate. Not even his type, if he was being honest. He remembered that first day, that first glance, the way he had shrugged it off.
And now he could not imagine not wanting him.
As time went on, Oscar opened up more. At least to Lando. He was calm, steady, the kind of person who made you feel like things might actually be okay. When Lando got too anxious, too stuck in his own head, Oscar was always there to pull him back down to earth. It felt like they were getting closer. Sometimes too close.
But Oscar always knew when to step back. He always knew where the line was, and he never crossed it. When Lando did, even just a little, Oscar would gently, quietly put the distance back between them.
Sometimes it stung. But Lando knew he had no one to blame but himself. He was the one who had fallen for someone who was just being kind. Just being decent. Just doing what teammates were supposed to do.
He knew all of that. He really did. He tried to be logical about it, tried to convince himself that this was just his brain looking for something to hold on to. That he was bored, lonely, tired of the same routine, and desperate for feelings. So his mind had picked the easiest target and clung to it.
But knowing that did not make it hurt any less.
And eventually it stopped being something he could ignore.
He thought about it for weeks. Went over every possible scenario in his head. Thought about drinking first, just to make it easier. Thought about sending a casual message on Christmas and letting it turn into something more honest. He thought about a hundred different ways to say it.
And still, he said nothing. Because he knew what he could lose. Not just Oscar, but the balance of the whole team, the thing they had built together. And that scared him more than rejection ever could.
Until one day, when they were leaving the MTC together, and Lando finally caught him near the exit.
He could tell something was wrong. Oscar had been off for weeks. Too tense, too quiet, his jokes edged with something nervous that did not quite fit the calm front he usually put on.
Lando stepped into his space without really thinking and asked if they could talk.
To his surprise, Oscar did not pull away. He just hesitated for a second, then nodded and suggested getting coffee, then maybe walking through the park nearby.
It almost felt like a date. And that thought alone made Lando’s chest ache.
Until Oscar told him the truth.
“I’m transferring,” Oscar said quietly, staring at the ground, turning the cup in his hands. “It’s already happening. They’re finishing things up.”
Lando felt like all the air had been knocked out of him.
For a moment, all he could hear was his own heartbeat. Too loud. Too fast. His eyes burned, but he refused to let the tears fall. Instead, he forced a smile that probably looked as broken as he felt.
“So… what about me?” The words came out rough, almost shaking. He swallowed and tried again. “I mean. I want you to be happy. I really do.”
“You’ll be okay,” Oscar said softly. “I believe in you.”
That hurt more than anything else.
A single tear still slipped down Lando’s cheek, traitorous, and he tasted salt when it reached the corner of his mouth.
The worst part was that he had expected this. Some version of it, at least. But expecting it did not mean he was ready to hear it. Did not mean he was ready to lose him like this.
He did not want to believe it. But he did. Oscar would never lie about something like this. Not now.
They sat there for a long time after that, not talking, just watching the sun sink lower and turn the water of the pond gold while ducks drifted across the surface.
Finally, Lando spoke. Because if he did not say it now, he never would.
“And just so today can really finish me off,” he said quietly, almost laughing at himself, “I like you. More than I should.”
Oscar looked at him for a long second.
“Yeah,” he said, gently. Like he had known. Like he was not surprised at all. “I’m with someone.”
Lando nodded. He had suspected it. Especially these past few months. The late calls, the reservations, the change in the way Oscar dressed, the photos that looked too carefully taken to be random. He could have put it all together a long time ago.
He just did not want to.
It still hurt. But it did not shatter him the way it might have, because part of him had already been bracing for this.
“Will we see each other again?” Lando asked, quietly now. Right now, all he wanted was a little more time. Even if it only made things harder later. “Just… one more time?”
Oscar hesitated.
Then he nodded.
“Yeah. We will.”