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‘I am the problem. I am the reason that everything falls apart in the end. I’m not like them. I don’t act how they act, I don’t dress how they dress, and I’m just all around nothing.’ Lily wrote on her paper in messy font. She was supposed to be paying attention to the lecture going on but her mind kept going to the boy sitting directly in front of her. The boy that used to be her closest friend, the one who told her everything would be alright.
“Hey what’s that say?” The person next to her asked.
“Oh it’s just a bit of free write. Not really coherent enough for reading.” Lily quickly covered the spot on her paper with the writing. The person just shrugged and went back to the lecture.
As she was packing up she felt a tap on her shoulder; the boy from in front of her was standing there. His light eyes met hers and she felt her chest tighten with both joy and pain.
“You dropped this. And uh you should write more.” He handed her the paper and pointed to the scrawl down one side. Her eyes widen when she realized that he had read it. “Also you aren’t a problem. You don’t need to be like ‘them’. I think you’re just fine the way you are.” He smiled at her.
“I didn’t...uh...write this about-“ Lily started
“I know you. I know you wrote that. You’ve told me something similar in the past.” You knew me, she thought to herself,
“Well thank you for returning the paper.” She mumbled quietly and put the paper in her backpack. They both walked out of the classroom together, neither of them speaking. They reached the stairwell when Jess walked up to him. Seeing as how they weren’t talking Lily assumed that she could leave with no problem. Boy was she wrong.
“Lily! Wait up a sec.” He called after her. She turned and raised her eyebrows at him. She watched as he whispered something in Kelly’s ear and then pressed a kiss to her cheek. Seeing this made Lily’s blood boil and she resisted the urge to make a crude comment. “Sorry about that. But uh I think we need to talk.”
“Really? About what?” Lily raised one eyebrow and started down the hallway.
“About everything.” Lily could feel his gaze on her but she didn’t meet it. “But I’m not sure where to start honestly.”
“You could start with the things that are most recent. Like how you want to fix the bridge with her, a girl who screwed you over twice now. But will burn the bridge with me, someone who actually gave a shit about your wellbeing, and not have any fucking problems with it.” Lily stopped walking and her voice got progressively angrier as she spoke.
“I haven’t burned the bridge with you. I treat you how I treat everyone.” Lily almost laughed.
“Yeah right. You do that now once I’m just fed up with your bullshit. You didn’t do that when I was confused, hurt, and a lot less angry then I am now. You did nothing but taunt me. Then out of nowhere I see that you and Jess are together which is news to me because last I heard you two despised each other.” He tried to get a word in edge wise but Lily just wouldn’t let him.
“You know what? No, I’m not doing this right now. You need to sit on what I said and come back to me once you’ve pulled your head out of the clouds and realize that the people who give a shit aren’t the ones that screw you over.” Lily left him at that. She wasn’t ready to hear his side, but she needed to tell him hers or she was going to lose her mind.