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Shane and Ilya were both sitting on high chairs facing across from each other against the backdrop of a plain white wall in an office of the Centaurs practice Arena. A tripod fitted with an ipad was facing them, and Harris stood behind it, occasionally studying the footage it was capturing.
This was just supposed to be a quick promo for social media, introducing Shane to Ottawa fans, where Ilya as captain would ask Shane a few questions. “No big deal, very informal.” Ilya had told him that morning over breakfast.
Ilya had told Shane to dress casually, so Shane had put on a pair of light wash jeans and a well fitting blue t-shirt his stylist had picked out for him, and a necklace. He still found it difficult to express himself with clothes, but he was experimenting more with jewelry and found he liked how it looked. It made him nervous, but he felt like he had been able to get away with chain necklaces without getting any odd looks. Ilya, however, was wearing a burgundy button down, dark formal slacks and dress shoes with his unruly hair gelled back out of his face. He looked fucking incredible, but Shane felt a dull sense of apprehension around whatever Ilya and Harris had clearly planned without telling him.
“Shane Hollander.” Ilya said formally, pronouncing every syllable the way he used to when he was goading Shane during face offs on the ice.
When Ilya made no move to speak again, Shane finally spoke. “Ilya Rozanov.” He said, parroting Ilya’s tone.
“Are you ready?” Ilya asked him.
“For what exactly?” Shane replied. “What is this?”
“I will ask you a series of serious and hard-hitting questions and you will answer them. And then we will see if you are Centaurs material.”
“I literally signed the contract two weeks ago.”
“Ignore him, Shane.” Harris called. “It’s just a get to know you video for the fans.”
“We will see about that.” Ilya said. He took a small case out of his pocket and opened it, taking out the glasses inside and sliding them onto his face.
“What– are those my glasses?” Shane demanded, because sure enough they were the navy blue rimmed reading glasses Shane had left sitting on his night stand the night before.
“Don’t know what you are talking about.”
“Ilya, those are prescription. You’re going to fuck up your eyes!”
“Is true, you have kind of bad eyesight, ha?” Ilya said, "Lucky for me because you look very handsome in glasses."
"Ilya."
“It's no problem, I will just wear them like sexy librarian for the rest of this interview.”
Shane tried to keep a straight face as Ilya stared at him over the rim of his glasses and lost the battle. Ilya looked like he was fighting a grin as well.
Shane felt his apprehension fade. There was nothing to be nervous about. It was just Ilya. And Harris too, who he was sure would allow Shane to watch the footage back and edit anything he didn’t like. There really were no stakes and he had nothing left to hide. For the first time since he could remember, he could just relax and be honest.
"Take the fucking glasses off idiot. You're going to bend the frame with your big head."
"I have very normal sized head." Ilya said, but he obediently took the glasses off and placed them carefully back in their case.
Ilya cleared his throat obnoxiously. “Ready to begin?”
“Sure.”
“Okay. Shane Hollander. What are you most looking forward to in this upcoming season?”
Shane blinked. “Oh. That’s like, a real question. I thought for sure you were going to ask me something stupid.”
“I would not do that, this is very professional environment. We are serious professionals here.”
“Right.”
“Well? Answer question, time is ticking.”
“Um, what am I looking forward to?" he repeated, trying to get at least partially back into his 'talking to media' headspace. "Same as usual, I guess. Winning points, scoring goals. Ottawa is my home town, this is my home team. I grew up coming to this arena to watch hockey with my parents. If I could help bring a cup back for my hometown, to the same arena I used to watch games in, that would be kind of the ultimate honor for me.”
Ilya nodded. “Boring answer, just as I suspected.”
“Oh, fuck you.” Shane said without heat. “Wait, can we curse in this?”
“Depends on the platform.” Harris called from behind the tripod. "Don't worry about it, we'll bleep it out."
“Well, what are you looking forward to this season?” Shane demanded.
“I am asking the questions here.” Ilya said. “You are the newbie, I am the captain.”
Shane nodded. “For now.” He said, and was rewarded by Ilya grinning back at him. He felt his smirk melt into something fonder. Across the room, Harris cleared his throat, making him aware they had probably been holding eye contact for too long.
Ilya noticed too, looking down and shuffling his little interview cards in his hands, which Shane could see actually were not just blank props as he had assumed, but actually had little notes written on them. “You are more than welcome to try and take the C from me, but I will not make it easy. I am very good captain.”
“Yes, yes. You’re a great captain.”
“Wow. He admits it.”
Shane shrugged. “You are.” he said, and meant it. He was more proud of Ilya’s leadership of both the Centaurs and the Raiders than he felt comfortable admitting out loud, sometimes even to Ilya, let alone on camera. He had only just become able to silently admit to himself, with no small amount of jealousy, that Ilya was probably a better captain than he was. “But in the end I’m the one who led a team to three cup wins, and you have, what was it again? One?”
“For now.” Ilya conceded. “After this year, it will be two.”
“It will be.” Shane agreed. “That’ll be my cup too, though. So unless one of us switches teams again, I’ll always have more cups than you.”
Ilya straightened up in his seat, smile falling off his face as he stared at Shane. It was clear he’d never thought about that before. After a moment, he said. “Your application for the Centaurs is rejected. Thank you for your time.”
Shane forced himself to keep a straight face. “I already got the contract, Ilya. The captain even recommended me.”
Ilya shook his head. “The captain is a very stupid man, I think.”
Shane couldn’t stop himself from letting out a small laugh. On rewatch, he would, in fact, be horrified at how much it sounded like the giggle of an infatuated teenage girl.
“Now what?” Ilya continued. “I am going to have to wait until you retire and then win two cups in a row. I have no choice.”
“You think I’m going to retire before you?” Shane asked incredulously.
“You think I’m going to retire before you?” Ilya demanded back, pointing between them. “Don’t challenge me, Shane. We will end up two geriatric fucks with fake hips like Scott Hunter. Still fighting on ice trying to win one last record against each other.”
Shane knew he was smiling like an idiot, also knew he couldn’t help it. “I can think of worse things.”
“Bet you can.” Ilya said quietly. “Okay. Very competitive, unpleasant.” he said, pretending to write things down. “This is going in your record. You are not doing well on this interview.”
“You’re so fucking annoying.” Shane said, shaking his head. “Fuck you for telling me to dress casually too, asshole.”
“You look very unprofessional.”
“Fuck off.”
“Okay this conversation is now like 80% bleeps, boys.” Harris called.
“Shit- I mean- Sorry Harris.” Shane said startled. Five minutes on camera with Ilya and his lifetime of media training goes out the window.
“Yes, sorry Harris. Our new hire has a potty mouth.”
“F-Don’t be rude.” Shane said, catching himself at the last moment.
“I am never rude. Okay. What is your favorite historical match?”
“Oh, wow that’s a tough one. Let me think.”
“I know the answer.”
“Really?” Shane said. “I don’t even know the answer, how would you?”
“It is 1972 match Raiders vs Admirals, final goal scored with less than a second on the clock. You talk about this game all the time.”
“No that’s my favorite goal ever. I don’t know if it’s my favorite game. The rest of the match was pretty standard.”
“You have separate categories?” Ilya asked incredulously.
“Of course! Don’t you? You don’t have a favorite goal and match?”
“Favorite game is easy. The one where I won Stanley Cup. Favorite goal? Also goal when I realized I won Stanley Cup. Second favorite was goal I scored on you when we beat Metros in the playoffs in 2015. On the way to win Stanley Cup.”
“Asshole.” Shane said reflexively. “Really? You don’t have a favorite historical match?”
“Not really. Is fun watching old games with you, but what I like about hockey is playing it. I am not scholar of the sport like you are.”
“Huh.” Shane said. He couldn't fathom anyone, especially a professional player, not being interested in the historical intricacies of the sport.
“Yes, you are huge hockey nerd. Is this news to you?”
“I mean, not really. I love hockey, it’s literally my job to know about it. Are you not a nerd about hockey?”
“No. I am a jock. This is classic nerd-jock relationship.” he gestured between them.
“Well, maybe if you were more of a nerd about it you would have more than one cup.”
“Mm.” Ilya took out a pen and pretended to write again as he said “Big. Huge. Jerk.”
“Next question.” Shane said, because otherwise he was just going to cuss more.
“Okay, what is your favorite sport to watch that isn’t hockey?”
“Oh good question… probably basketball? The Raptors have have a surprisingly good season which is exciting. Canada isn’t really a huge name in basketball historically, so that’s nice to see. I’m not a huge football guy, but I like watching rugby. Some of the women’s rugby games from the last olympics were incredible, like peak athleticism. And it’s violent like hockey, so I do like that. Your favorite is soccer right?”
“Yes, like everywhere else in the world except for this strange continent.”
“I think Mexico might resent that implication.”
“Fair enough, Mexico is full of normal people who have good sports taste.”
“Canada isn’t?”
“Of course Canada is.” He looks directly at the camera. “Canada is the best country on earth. Citizenship office, if you are listening, please approve my greencard application.”
“Obviously they're going to. You’re married to a citizen.”
“Well I wish they would hurry up.” he muttered. Ilya had been too nervous to take an international trip until they did as he had developed a paranoia that he wouldn’t be let back into the country. But what did Shane know? He had never had citizenship issues, maybe it wasn’t paranoia. Certainly the last thing he wanted was to put Ilya at risk of ending up back in Russia. He was probably the most famous Russian queer person alive at this point.
“What is your favorite thing to do in off season?” Ilya continued.
“Um, I mean I still like working out. I like to read more on off season.” He smiled at Ilya. “I know this is probably a boring answer, but my favorite thing to do is just going to our cottage with Anya and like, hanging out. Going hiking, swimming in the lake, cooking together, basic stuff."
Ilya looked at him with an odd expression. “Our cottage?” he repeated.
Shane frowned, unsure why Ilya seemed confused at answer that he should obviously know. Then he realized. Softly he said, “Yea, of course. We’re married, Ilya. I mean, I guess I haven’t officially added you to the deed, but I can.” In fact, he resolves to do just that when they get home.
Ilya just nodded. Shane could tell now, when something got to him but he was trying not to show it. After a moment, he said. “Is nice being married to a real estate mogul.”
“I’m not a real estate mogul.”
“Really? Do you still own that building you bought for us to meet up in?”
"Oh my god." Shane felt himself blush, which, unlike Russians, he was unfortunately very prone to do. “No, I do not, Ilya. I sold it like five years ago!”
“Buying and selling buildings sounds like real estate mogul behavior.”
“Hey guys” Harris called. “You’re really cute and all, and I’m 100% gonna need to know more about you buying Ilya a building. But Troy and I do have a dinner resy soon so can we…”
“Yes, god. Sorry Harris. Also the building wasn’t for him it was–”
“It was what?” Ilya asked, grinning.
“It was a mistake. Like making this video with you.”
“Don’t say that moya lyubov, fans will love this. We are so charming and handsome. Okay. Here is some rapid fire questions. Pick one option.”
Shane nods.
“Sweet or savory?”
“Um.” His stomach does something odd. He honestly isn't sure. He’s only just allowed himself to relax slightly about what he can and cannot eat, especially during the season. He’s been so disciplined about his diet for so long, that the idea of having preferences sends an odd spike of anxiety through him.
“I know answer to this too.” Ilya said after a moment. “Depends on his mood, but he likes ginger ale as a treat.”
“That’s true.” Shane said, sending Ilya a grateful smile.
“How about you let him answer the questions, Cap?” Harris called.
“Sorry. Okay. Morning or night?”
Okay, this one is easy at least. “Morning.”
“I think that depends on what’s happening at night.” Ilya said, wiggling his eyebrows.
“That’s a cut for you, Harris.” Shane said.
“Book or movie?”
“Depends, but usually book.”
“Beach vacation or city vacation?”
“Also depends, but I like relaxing vacations and big cities can be kind of overwhelming to me sometimes, so probably beach.”
“God, this is boring.”
“Hey!” Harris called. “People love a rapid fire question round!”
“Sorry Harris." Ilya said. "It’s true though, these are boring questions.”
“Leave Harris alone. Did you come up with any questions to ask me?”
“Of course.”
“Okay, try me.”
“Okay.” He shuffled his stack of cards around and pulled one out, nodding to himself with a serious expression. “So, when did you decide to become gay?”
Shane snorted, partially choking on the water in his mouth, which he was sure Ilya had waited for him to take a sip of before speaking.
“Fuck you!” He said once he finished coughing. “See, that’s the kind of dumb fucking question I knew you were going to ask.”
“So you refuse to answer. Noted.”
“You should probably know the answer asshole, you were there.”
Shane watched as Ilya registered the answer, his face lighting up with a grin. “Yes, I suppose I was. Good memories.”
Shane shook his head. “We are so cutting this, by the way, Harris.” he said towards the camera.
“Yea, I figured. I'm also literally writing down questions to ask you later. But for now can you guys, like, focus?”
“Sorry. Focusing.” Ilya said. “Okay, now that we have shocked sports fans with Heated Rivalsgate-”
Shane physically could not hold in his laugh. “What? Is that a real term? Who says that?”
“I do.”
“No way. Who taught you that?”
“Uh, that would be me.” Harris called from behind the camera.
“Harris. Did you come up with that?” Shane said, still laughing. “Do you even know what Watergate is?” he asked Ilya.
“What, because I am immigrant, I don’t know anything?”
“What is Watergate, Ilya?” Shane asked him.
Ilya looked at him, annoyed. “I don’t know what Watergate is and I don’t fucking care. Big dam broke? I don’t know.”
Shane was truly laughing now. “It was a presidential scandal with Richard Nixon-”
“Richard Nixon?” Ilya repeated. “This is not even Canadian, it is American? Why the fuck should I care about this gate?”
“You’re the one who is using it as a term!”
“Harris told me to say this. Anyway, nerd. Now that we have shocked the world with our great love and romance-”
“Ilya, Jesus–”
“Are there any ideas you would like to clear up about us?”
“About us?”
“Yes, like our relationship. It is very surprising for people, and they are saying crazy shit online, especially now that we are playing on the same team. Do you have anything you want to say?”
At first Shane thought Ilya was joking, making another attempt at banter. But then he saw that Ilya was serious. This was Shane’s chance to directly address the misgivings people had about them.
“Oh.” He thought about it. “I mean. I think people might have the idea that because we’re, like, married and everything that our whole rivalry was totally fake and that’s just not true. Like, the media definitely hyped it up, and obviously we never actually hated each other, but it was totally real. We are incredibly competitive people, especially with each other. We've been together a long time, and that hasn't changed at all. And for the record, I would rather slit my throat with an ice skate than ever let you win on purpose.”
Ilya nodded. “I know this.”
“And also, I’d like to say that every team in the league should be scared shitless. Like I said, we’re both the most competitive people I know and we’re at our best when we have something to prove. And right now, we do. So we’re gonna win some games–”
“A lot of games-”
“A lot of games. And then we’re gonna win a cup.”
“Maybe a few.”
“And we’ll bring them back here, to Ottawa." Shane turned to the camera, grinning like a lunatic. “I can’t fucking wait.”
“Me neither.” Ilya copied him, turning to address the camera. “We’ll see you in October, hockey fans! Ottawa, get ready to win!”
“Nice landing boys.” Harris said, grinning. “That’s a wrap.”