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Atsushi Nakajima is a normal kid.
He does his homework, he hangs out with his friends, he goes to parties, all that jazz. He’s the cheer captain, which he’s very dedicated to. He lives the life that all kids dream of them they think of being in high school. But there’s one teensy, agitating, infuriating issue.
“Miss me, tiger?”
Akutagawa Ryuunosuke.
“Oh fuck off, Golem, I’m not in the mood” Atsushi snaps right back at him, continuing his escape to the locker rooms for cheer practice. Ofcourse, Akutagawa follows, because god forbid the emo man leaves Atsushi alone for once.
“Are you ever?” Akutagawa says, catching up to Atsushi’s stride and walking beside him.
“Not around you, I’m not”.
Akutagawa’s snort echoes through the dilapidated walls of the Gym corridor. It always catches Atsushi just slightly off guard when he does that. Laugh. Well, not really laugh, but snort or snicker. It’s just that almost everyone else has this view of Akutagawa. Quiet, unbothered, just wants to be left alone. Clearly, they’re wrong, because Akutagawa’s favourite activity is to piss Atsushi off.
Atsushi turns, finally meeting Akutagawas gaze. “Ok, actually fuck off now. I have cheer practice and if you make me late I’ll kill you”.
Akutagawa’s amusement only grows, as it now tints his usually flat, stormy eyes. “Ah, and what a tragedy that would be. Missing precious time that could be spent.. what? Bouncing around a field with Pom-Pom’s?”
Anger flares in Atsushis stomach, bubbling and boiling into a dangerous potion. Last time he hit Akutagawa, it sparked into an actual fight. (Atsushi thinks he won. So does Akutagawa. If you were to ask any sane being, they’d tell you the truth, that they were exactly the same level of beat-the-hell-up, so it was most definitely a tie). And Atsushi really doesn’t feel like being suspended again, infact he shudders just at the memory of how his adoptive father, Oda, reacted.
“Can you even talk? You don’t do anything but brood on the bleachers and take up Chuuya’s time” Atsushi says, crossing his arms.
“Hah. Funny. Me and you both know I’m on the soccer team” Akutagawa snarls, kissing his teeth. His eyes sharpen just so, but Atsushis own have such a burning contact with them that ofcourse he notices. “Don’t you have something to do?”
The memory of ‘oh shit, practice’ rushes through Atsushis bones, and he doesn’t waste a second before snapping a quick ‘fuck you’ to Akutagawa before sprinting through the door of the changing rooms.
__________________________________________
“And where have you been, captain?” Dazai sasses, a hand on his hip.
Atsushi momentarily considers telling the truth, because then he’d get to rant about how much of an asshole Akutagawa is (again), but then he’d also have to confess that he stayed speaking to him, for longer than he realised at that. “I had to show a first year where their class was”
“Hm, is that so? Seems odd, considering we’re halfway through the year. Surely they’d know by now?” Dazai teases, feigning confusion.
Ah yes, Atsushi almost forgot. Dazai’s a freak of nature who seems to know anything. Also doesn’t help that Atsushi happens to be an awful liar.
“Uh. Yeah, um. First years, you know how they are” Atsushi stutters, scratching at the back of his neck with a nervous giggle.
Dazai isn’t on the team, but he likes to hang around nonetheless. Mostly just to annoy Atsushi, but that’s a given anyways. They’re best friends, and have been for as long as Atsushi can remember. Infact, they first met on Atsushi’s first day of nursery. Life wouldn’t be the same without Dazai, as simply said as possible. He was there for Atsushi when he was still with his biological parents, abusive and neglectful in a way that no child should have to endure. Infact, when Atsushi was 12 and Dazai was 13, Dazai went fist for fist with his dad just to protect him. Atsushi knows there’s no way he could ever repay him, but the best he can do is take him down from nooses and drag him out of rivers every other day.
“Are we actually gonna practice now or are you gonna continue this mother’s meeting?” Lucy says, crossing her arms as her Pom-Pom’s rustle.
Cheer is one of the only consistencies in Atsushi’s life, other than Dazai. He’s been doing it ever since he was 13, when he told Odasaku with all the shyness you’d expect, that he’d seen it on TV and wanted to try it. Ever supportive, Oda signed him up for both cheer and gymnastics lessons, despite their financial issues. He found it to be his freedom. People liked it when he cheered. He got to support the players while the crowd supported him. Not to mention the way his body seemed to know the moves even before his mind did. It’s a talent he can’t explain, only show.
“Alright, that was good! Now remember, the match against Nagasaki High is on Saturday, and we get on that bus at 7am sharp! So get good sleep, mkay!” Atsushi chirps, ignoring the chorus of groans from the squad.
Atsushi trots over to Dazai, waiting on the bleachers. “Hey, you ready to go?” The brunette grumbles. Atsushi only nods, exhausted from practice, and slips into place next to Dazai on the way to the older man’s car.
“So, I was meaning to say, Junichiro’s throwing a huge party on Friday. You gonna go?” Dazai asks, drumming his tan fingers against the leather of his old, yet expensive car. Courtesy of his father Mori, ofcourse.
“Uhh, I don’t know, I have homework and.. stuff” Atsushi knows it’s a shitty excuse, but he couldn’t think of anything else in the moment.
Dazai huffs out a laugh, “And stuff? What kind of stuff would that be, Sushi?”
“Ok, god forbid I don’t want to go to one party” Atsushi mumbles, face flushed with embarrassment.
“One? When was the last time you went to a party, dude?” Dazai says, smirking with a grossly smug look on his tan face.
“I don’t go because every time I end up having to take care of your drunk ass!” Atsushi huffs, crossing his arms with a pout. Unfortunately, it’s not an exaggeration, he literally always ends up dragging Dazais blackout drunk body out of some random house every time he decides it would be funny to go to one party.
“Well then let loose, just this once! Don’t worry about what I’m doing, have your own fun! Hey, you could always ask Junichiro for a little something. Everyone knows he has the good weed” Dazai knows damn well Atsushi’s not gonna smoke anything unless Dazai’s the one who’s dragged him into it, as everything he’s done has been at the fault of.
First time sneaking out? To see Dazai. First time drinking? At Dazai’s place. First time smoking weed? With Dazai. It’s probably the reason why Oda still has such a wobbly trust for him even after Atsushis been friends with him for 13 years.
“I dunno… are you sure I can just leave you to your own devices like that? What if you get in a fight, or get hurt, or anything?” Atsushi mumbles, worry forming in a crease between his brows.
Dazai sighs, looking over him for just a moment before looking back to the road. “You don’t have to take care of me so much, you know? You don’t owe me anything”
The statement in itself burns Atsushi to his core, because he simply just can’t believe it.
“…Ok. Yeah, I’ll go” He says, a genuine smile adorning his soft face.
It’s silent for a while, ofcourse, until Dazai turns on his god awful music.
“Oh would you turn this shit off-!”
__________________________________________
“I’m home!” Atsushi calls to the walls of his home. Kyouka, his younger sister, should be home by now, and Oda has been working on his most recent book nonstop so he’s probably home too.
Unsurprisingly, he’s met with silence back. Not surprising, in a house of introverts.
Their house isn’t very big, but it’s homey. Atsushi treasures how warm it always feels as he walks to Oda’s office. Once the dark wood of the door meets his eyes, he takes a deep breath and knocks. “Come in”
Slowly opening the door, Atsushi replies, “Hey, Dad. I was just wondering if I could go to a party on Friday? Junichiros throwing a big summer thing at his place, and Dazai asked if I could go”
Oda plucks off his glasses, finally lifting his eyes from his notebook. “And will there be alcohol?”
“Well.. yes. But I promise I won’t drink much, and I’ll get a ride home from Chuuya!” Bringing up Chuuya is basically his ticket to a yes, since Oda is convinced Chuuya’s a good influence.
Oda doesn’t say anything for a while, mulling over his options. So, Atsushi pulls out his secret card, a grin stretching across his face, “Oh, also.. I heard Mr Sakaguchi is going out for dinner on Friday night… all alone… no one to accompany him…”
Oda’s eyes widen in shock, and his cheeks bloom into a startling red. “Hn. Well, I suppose you can go… but be home by 12” His blush deepens, so much so that Atsushi restrains a giggle, “actually, nevermind, just.. be back by morning. And don’t make any bad choices, okay?”
“Thanks, dad! When you and Mr Sakaguchi get married, make sure to tell him it was because of me, mkay!” Atsushi chirps, skipping out the office.
“Shut it!” Oda’s flustered voice calls from inside the room, but Atsushi’s already gone, giggling his way to his room, dreaming of his bed already.
His fantasy of a warm, peaceful, long nap is rudely interrupted immediately, however, by the sight of his little sister perched on his bed. “Jesus, Kyouka!” He jumps, clutching at his imaginary pearls.
“Hello.” She says, monotone as always
“….Hey, kid…. You wanna explain why you’re in here, or are you gonna continue acting like a ninja” Atsushi asks, pretending to be creeped out. Pretending, because it’d be hard to be scared by her personality when they’ve known eachother for 4 years. She’s only 13, but she’s one weird kid, and it really did freak him out when they first met.
“I heard some things”
Atsushi sits at the foot of his bed next to her, tucking his knees up to his chest. “Okay, and what were these things”
“My friends said you have a crush on Akutagawa” Her burning eye contact is finally cut when he coughs up a lung in response.
“What?! No I do not! Gross!!” He chokes out, a deep flush of embarrassment(?) coating his cheeks.
“Hm. That’s not what my friend said” She replies, crossing her arms with a huff.
“Who are these fucking kids you’re talking to?!” Atsushi screeches.
“Language!” Oda calls from downstairs.
Atsushi simply can’t stop choking, and clearly it gets to a point of concern because Kyouka pats him on the back sympathetically. Finally, he manages to catch his breath, pounding his fist against his stomach. “Look. Akutagawa is an evil, annoying, brooding, hell-sent, rabid dog who I hate with all my might. I would rather sh-…. poop.. in my hands and clap than ever, ever, ever date him!”
“I didn’t say you were dating. I said you have a crush on him”
“Yeah well you’re wrong!”
She gives him the most judgemental, up and down look manageable, before humming a ‘Mhm’ and trotting out of his room.
As Atsushi slumps onto his back, staring up at the white ceiling of his room, he comes to a conclusion. His sister must be an idiot.
As if Atsushi would ever, ever have a crush on Akutagawa Ryuunosuke. Blegh
__________________________________________
The sound of teenagers gossiping, lockers slamming shut, and Mr Fitzgerald ranting to a poor first year echos around the hallway of Bungou High. The same as always.
As Atsushi trots through the halls, headphones blaring, his eyes catch onto Junichiro and Tachihara, bickering about something. Atsushis shocked they’re still pretending they aren’t madly inlove. It brings a small smile to Atsushis face.
Just behind them, Dazai is being screamed by Kunikida, the older boy being slammed back and forth against the formers locker. But just as Sigma passes by, a dazed smile spreads across his face, as he waves to the Polish exchange student. Blushing, Sigma speeds off, but Dazai is quickly distracted by Kunikida’s anger.
Love must be in the air, then. Not for Atsushi though.
With an annoyed pout on his face, Atsushi slams his locker shut and walks up to Lucy. Or atleast, he would’ve, if she wasn’t with her girlfriend Louisa.
Why is everyone all lovey dovey today!
Can’t Atsushi get a damn break from everyone reminding him how painfully single he is!
Exhaling a frustrated huff, he trots off of Dazai instead. Since he’s ever so generous, Atsushi manages to pull Dazai off Kunikida by the scruff of his neck, “Sorry, I need to borrow him”
At the sight of him, Dazai lights up, “Ah, Atsushi! My dearest, kindest, prettiest friend! Do you think you could give me ¥5000-“
“Absolutely not”
“What?! Why not? I’m your best friend, you should be nice to me!” Dazai whines.
“Ok, first of all, that’s definitely not a rule. Literally last week you tried to hit me with your car-“ Atsushi scoffed.
“Ok, but you didn’t even move! Clearly you couldn’t have cared that much if you just let me run you over” Dazai says, rolling his eyes.
Ignoring him, Atsushi continues, “Secondly, even if that was true, I still wouldn’t lend money to you when I know damn well you only want it to pay back Kunikida! And then you’ll never pay me back! Find your own money, dude”
Dazai sighs, but accepts it, as he slips into his natural strut beside Atsushi. “So, are you ready for final practice? I heard a lot of people are coming to watch”
“Uh, yeah. I mean, I’m as ready as I can be” Atsushi replies, nervously playing with the strap of his bag.
“Hm. I’m sure it’ll be fine. You’re good”. The words are awkward, as they always are when Dazai tries to reassure him about- well, anything. He’s not great at the emotional stuff.
Just as Dazai said, there was a crowd of people on the bleachers near where cheer practice was about to happen. Nerves cause a shudder to wrack through Atsushis body, but he continues walking nonetheless, determined not to show his fear.
Their faces blur into a sludge of eyes, noses and mouths, Atsushi can’t make out who he does and doesn’t know anymore. His breathing picks up by itself, and he can’t hear what Dazais saying anymore.
But through all of it, one face prevails. One face shows. One face is familiar. Akutagawa Ryuunosuke.
His thin eyebrows, and big nose, and grey eyes, thin lips, pale skin, that mole on his cheek, god it’s all so oddly comforting. And all of a sudden nothings scary anymore. His hearing isn’t fuzzy, and his eyes seem to work.
With a grin, Atsushi trots off to his team, waving at them excitedly. “Hey, team! You guys ready, cause it seems we have quite the audience this time!”
Their voices come out in a chorus of ‘yes!’, and he doesn’t waste a second before getting into position and ushering Dazai to play the music. Faintly, Atsushi can see Akutagawa in the crowd, just looking at him. There’s something simmering behind his eyes, but Atsushi can’t quite tell what it is yet.
As soon as the music hits his ears, he begins his routine like muscle memory. He barely registers the audience, he can’t really hear their cheers anymore. All he can hear is the lighting fast rush of his own blood through his veins. All he can feel is the grin on his face ever growing, and his brow furrowing slightly in concentration. And that furrow only deepens when he realises it’s his time. His time to fly.
He feels Tachihara grip his waist as he jumps back, ready to be thrown into the air, and for a reason he’s unsure of, dread settled deep into his stomach.
The second he hears a voice call ‘Hey Tachihara, over here!’, he knows his gut was right. And sure enough, across the field, some random second year holds a plank of wood, the tip of it glowing with the warm tones of fire.
Tachihara is afraid of fire. It’s his worst fear.
And Atsushi can’t even do anything. He’s suspended in the air by a grip that falters in mere seconds. Before he knows it, he’s tumbling to the ground as Tachihara backs up in horror.
The sound of the impact when he hits the group is gruesome.
Snap.
Gasps echo through the crowd, but Atsushi can’t hear it over his screaming. The pain is searing, cutting down to his core and ripping apart his nerves. He faintly hears Dazai yell ‘Atsushi’, and thank god he’s here to help him, is what Atsushi thinks as he’s helped into a sitting position against Dazai.
It seems never ending. The pain, the crowds whispering, the wait for the ambulance. But when it finally comes, the relief makes the wait almost worth it. Almost.
But as Atsushi is being put on the gurney and carried away onto the ambulance, one thing hits him.
There’s only three people who know Tachihara is afraid of fire. Atsushi, Tachihara himself, and Akutagawa.
__________________________________________
“So.. when am I gonna be able to cheer again? It’ll heal soon, right?” Atsushi damn near begs, looking up at his doctor with tearful eyes. He’s surprised he has any tears left, to be honest.
“I’m sorry, Nakajima-san, but your injury was rather severe. Your tibia and fibula were shattered on impact. It’ll be atleast 2 months before you can walk without support” The doctor says, a sorrowful look on his face.
2 months. 2 months before he can walk. How long will it be until he can cheer?
He can’t manage to choke out any words, they’re lodged in his dry throat.
The game next week against Nagasaki. The tournament next month. Weekly practice, for gods sake. It’s all gone. For months.
Since it’s been a few hours since he got dragged into the hospital, he’s had a lot of time to think. About what happened. Some kid, a second year of Atsushi’s correct, waved a wooden plank on fire at Tachihara, who has a crippling fear of fire. The shock of seeing the fire caused Tachihara to panic, and therefore drop Atsushi.
The only reason Atsushi knows about Tachihara fear is because last year, Atsushi found him having a panic attack in a hallway because of the experiment they were doing in chemistry. It’s one of Tachiharas biggest secrets, and Atsushi swore he’d keep it a secret for the rest of his life.
The only other person who knows about it is Akutagawa, because he and Akutagawa have been best friends since pre school. However, they aren’t friends anymore, after a nasty argument a few months ago.
No one else knows, so it was Akutagawa who orchestrated the whole thing.
But that’s the thing. Sure, Akutagawa and Tachihara have drifted apart a bit ever since Tachihara and Tanizaki started dating, but still- Akutagawa would never do something like that just for the sake of scaring him.
So Akutagawa didn’t do it to harm Tachihara. No, he did it purely because he knew it’d end up with Atsushi injured.
On the list of asshole things Akutagawa has done to Atsushi, this has knocked everything far off the bored and taken the first, second, third, fourth, fifth and sixth spot. Not only did he cause Atsushi immense pain, but he also took away one of the only things that make him feel like himself. Cheer.
All of a sudden, Atsushi doesn’t feel the need to argue, or bicker, or punch Akutagawa anymore. He’s too tired for that stuff anymore.
He just never wants to see that awful man ever again.
__________________________________________
He sees Akutagawa again.
Infact, he sees him exactly 2 days later, after being dismissed from the hospital. Thankfully, Atsushi didn’t have to go to school, since it’s only a Friday so Oda gave him the grace of peace.
And he wouldn’t have had to see Akutagawa again, if it weren’t for fucking Dazai.
“What the fuck are you doing here at,” Atsushi checks his phone with a tired huff, “ten at night. I want to sleep Dazai. I had to hobble down the stairs, for what?”
“Well- for the party, ofcourse! How could you forget?” Dazai chirps, inviting himself in.
“Excuse me? I am going no where, nevermind a damn party” Atsushi barked, tightening his grip on his crutches.
“But Atsushiiiii, you promised you’d let loose just this once! You promised, you can’t go back on a promise!” Dazai whines, draping himself over Atsushi.
“Ow ow ow get off get off my leg-!”
With a small ‘ah’, Dazai sets Atsushi free, before walking into his living room and collapsing on his sofa. “So, are we gonna go or what?”
Atsushi thinks. Deeply. For a solid 20 seconds before remembering this is Dazai he’s speaking to, so there’s no point in even trying to say no. “Alright, fine. But you’re helping me change, dude, I can’t get anything over my legs alone”.
With a grin, Dazai hops out of his seat, “Why, ofcourse Atsushi-kun.”
__________________________________________
The party is loud.
Very fucking loud.
Honestly, it’s like- the second worst thing to deal with right now, the first ofcourse being Akutagawa. But even the thought of his name brings a shudder through Atsushis spine, like the dudes Voldemort or something.
“Atsushi, dude! I didn’t think I’d see you here, after what happened! Anything I can get ya? A shot, cocktail, brownie?” Junichiro chirps, excitedly patting him on the back.
“Yeah, I’ll take whatever you’ll mix up for me. No thanks to the brownie though, I’m not really feeling that today” Atsushi sighs, following Junichiro to the drinks table.
“I can only imagine, man. Not to be rude or anything, but shouldn’t be at home? Recovering from your, like- shattered leg?” Junichiro asks, genuine concern lacing his voice. He passes Atsushi the drink, a furrow in his brow as he watches him take a sip and choke over the very strong mixture.
“God- what is this? Uh- yeah, though, I should be at home. But Dazai dragged me out, so..” He says, trialing off at the end as he catches a certain eye. The one he did not want to see today. At all.
Akutagawa’s stormy eyes, that is.
Immediately, he feels sick, and he grabs a half empty bottle of cherry vodka as he sprints out. Or atleast- he tries. His crutches definitely slow him down, but damn does he try.
Because there was something in Akutagawas eyes. Something that Atsushi hasn’t seen before. And it looked an awful lot like guilt. Regret. Sympathy, even. Which is ridiculous, because Akutagawa doesn’t have emotions. Nevermind towards someone else. Even less so, towards Atsushi.
The second he spots a seemingly empty room, he’s throwing himself inside, dropping a crutch in the process. With a deep sigh, he slides down the wall, relief pumping through his bloodstream. The second he’s managed to half himself down, he’s reaching for that bottle. It burns as it runs down his throat. The rancid taste brings him back to his surroundings. He’s kinda stuck for the time being, since he only has one crutch, but he’s not sure he’d leave even if he had the option.
Time ticks by, but Atsushi can’t find himself bored. Not with so many thoughts to entertain himself with.
Over the last few days, Atsushi has done some looking into that second year. Apparently, he’s known to be a bit chaotic, and he’ll do anything for money. Anything. And Atsushi knows he wasn’t looking too deep into it when he remembered Akutagawa happens to be filthy, old money, borderline aristocracy rich. A low blow from Akutagawa, but then again, Atsushi’s not shocked. This is Akutagawa, for gods sake.
Just as Atsushi thought he’d finally gotten peace and quiet, the door opens. And in walks the last person he wants to see. Ryuunosuke fucking Akutagawa. “Oh for fucks sake, it’s you”
“Yeah, yeah, I don’t want to be in the same room as you either. But there’s no rooms without anyone hooking up, so deal with it. Or, if you’d like, you can join Kunikida and Chuuya in the bathroom? Or maybe Dazai in the master bedroom with Sigma-?”
“Ok, ok! I get your point, don’t put that image in my head.” Atsushi says as Akutagawa hesitantly sits down next to him, back ramrod straight.
It’s silent. Awkwardly silent, which Atsushi attempts to cover up with a clear of the throat. It only makes the tense atmosphere worse.
The alcohol is slowly getting to Atsushi. He’s always been such a lightweight. Unfortunately, he’s also a blabbering drunk, and all of a sudden he feels the urge to just scream his frustration at the man next to him. It doesn’t help that Akutagawa is clearly tipsy too.
Inhibitions out the window, Atsushi can’t help the volume of his voice when he talks, “Why would you do it? Why would you do this do me? I didn’t- god, I didn’t even do anything. You’ve taken everything from me. I don’t get why. Why, akutagawa, why?!”
Akutagawa flinches sharply at the yell, hunching in on himself subconsciously. He doesn’t reply for what feels like ages. And when he finally does, it’s a meek whisper. “I didn’t mean for it to hurt you that bad. I just.. meant for you to fall”.
“Yeah, and fall I fucking did! What did you think was going to happen, I was practically thrown off Tachihara! Obviously I got fucking hurt!” Atsushis crying now, tears tumbling down his cheeks.
“You don’t get it, ok? You just don’t understand. You couldn’t” Akutagawa huffs, refusing to meet Atsushis eyes, the beautiful sunset of them blurred with salty tears.
“No, no I don’t understand! But god, just tell me! Tell me why you did it, because you’ve ruined my life, Akutagawa! You owe me a damn explanation! You owe it to m-“.
“I just wanted your attention, okay?! Is that good enough for you?! You just- god, you’ve become so obsessed with everyone else, it’s like you’ve forgotten about me! It’s always Dazai, or Tachihara, or Junichiro, or anyone else, you don’t have time for our arguments anymore!” Akutagawas voice cracks as he snaps, finally turning to Atsushi.
“…are you kidding me? You broke my fucking leg, ruined my life for the next, what, 6 months, just because you wanted my attention? You- you missed our bickering so much that you had to shatter my leg in 4 places?!” Atsushis eyes are so wide, so twitchy, that he can only imagine Akutagawa is reminded of their fight. That’s probably how he looked before he threw the first punch.
“…you make it sound dumb, when you say it like that.” Akutagawa huffs, damn near pouting.
“Because it is dumb!” Atsushi nearly screams, wincing as he accidently leans on his leg too much.
“You.. you just don’t get it. There’s so many people around you, I can’t afford to have them take you from me. You don’t see the way Tachihara looks at you. It disgusts me.” Akutagawa says, his voice souring.
“First off, I don’t belong to you, so fuck off with that mentality. Second off, Why is it any of your business who I date? If I wanted Tachihara, then that’s mine and his business only. Not to mention how he and Junichiro are so obviously into eachother, what are you, blind?” Atsushi scolded, crossing his arms.
Akutagawa doesn’t reply, and so Atsushi decides to continue with his thousands of questions. “And anyway, what did you think was going to happen? How would my falling garner my attention to you in any way?”
A flush adorns Akutagawas pale cheeks, and all of a sudden Atsushi needs to know whatever he’s thinking that’s got him all flustered. “It doesn’t matter. I didn’t intend for you to get this hurt, so we can move on and forget this conversation ever happened.”
“No, no, tell me. What were you planning, Akutagawa? What were you gonna do, sweep in like a knight in shining armour to save me from the evil Tachi?” Atsushi says, a grin creeping onto his face and leaking into his tone.
Clearly Akutagawa really must be tipsy, because after a moment of thought, he actually replies to Atsushi. “I- I was planning on.. helping you. Get up, that is. And- and I thought, maybe, if you saw that I can be.. somewhat- gentlemanly of sorts, you’d.. change your mind about me.”
Atsushi finds himself utterly speechless. And if he didn’t know Akutagawa, he would assume this is a confession of sorts. But as he thinks about it, really thinks, he realises that this is fucking hilarious. A laugh builds up in this throat, climbing and climbing in volume until he’s cackling.
Understandably, Akutagawa looks at him like he’s insane. “What is so funny? I am spilling my heart out to you and- and you just laugh?!” He barks, eyes wide with exasperation.
“I’m- I’m sorry, it’s just, you really thought that would work? What, were you gonna pick me up and carry me away like a true gentleman?” Atsushi wheezes, clutching at his stomach and rubbing away a tear of pure amusement from his eye.
“..Well yes, that was my plan.” Akutagawa scoffs, looking away in embarrassment.
Atsushi’s laughter only grows at the idea, “Oh please, as if you can pick me up”
“Excuse you, I could most definitely lift you. Infact, I have been working out as of late” Akutagawa says, snobby pride tainting his voice.
Without thinking it through, Atsushi grabs onto Akutagawa’s bicep, squeezing to feel the thin but tough muscle of it. “Huh, you have. It’s all.. solid and shit.”
With no reply, Atsushi wonders if he’s done something wrong, so he looks up to see Akutagawa’s entire face a deep red. But Atsushi can’t bring himself to tear his hand away. The muscle tenses even more beneath the bare touch of Atsushi’s hand.
Atsushi doesn’t know when they got so close together. Or when Akutagawas hand made its way to his waist. But somehow, he finds himself nudging Akutagawas nose with his own, leaning in ever so slightly, teasing Akutagawa into making that final move.
Just as expected, the taller man takes the bait, lunging forward. It’s so very them, Atsushi knows it the second they meet. It’s passionate, and fiery, and not unlike a competition in the way they fight to lead (though Atsushi doesn’t put up a fight for very long, accepting Akutagawas forceful kisses).
As they part, Atsushi slips his eyes open, meeting the sharp ones ahead of him. “God, you’re such a loser. You know you could’ve just like- asked me out, right?”
Akutagawa scoffs at the mere idea, “You would’ve never said yes, I had to make you see I would be a good boyfriend.”
“I mean yeah, I would’ve rejected your ass so fast, but that’s why you persist, Akutagawa! Have some fighting spirit” Atsushi chirps, patting Akutagawa’s chest swiftly. Just as he’s leaning away, he registers what the older man said. “Wait- boyfriend?”
Clearly caught off guard, Akutagawa coughs, attempting to school his flustered expression. “Well, if you would have me as such, I would be honoured to take such a position in your lif-“
Atsushi cuts him off with a soft kiss, and Akutagawa immediately melts into it, repositioning his hand at Atsushi’s waist.
As Atsushi pulls away, he grins at his new boyfriend, “You get all 1800’s speak when you’re flustered. It’s cute. And yes, I want you to be my boyfriend. I want to be your boyfriend. I want to be yours.”
Akutagawa’s face lights up so fast that Atsushi almost doesn’t finish what he was saying. “But! First, you have to apologise to Tachihara. He deserves it. Not right now though, I’m pretty sure I saw him walking up to Junichiro when I left”.
“…Must I? I haven’t spoken to him in a while. I don’t want to” Akutagawa complains, crossing his arms.
“Yes, you have to. You really freaked him out, Ryuunosuke” Atsushi scolds gently.
At the sound of his given name in Atsushi’s voice, Akutagawa pipes down. Lifting himself up off the ground, he offers his hand to Atsushi.
“Ah- um, I can’t, I dropped my crutch in the hallway.” Atsushi says sheepishly, rubbing the back of his neck.
Akutagawa hums an affirming noise, but when he goes to grab the crutch from outside, it’s nowhere to be seen. Immediately, Atsushi realises the idiocy of his own actions. Ofcourse his crutch was stolen at a high school party.
“Hm. Well, I suppose I must prove I would’ve been able to carry you away, then.” And with that, Atsushi finds himself lifted off the ground with a squawk, yelling meaningless words of ‘put me down, idiot!’.
And as they walk out the party, Atsushi pretends he doesn’t see Dazai’s look of ‘I told you so’. If he brings it up on Monday, then Atsushi can always just tease him about what’s apparently happened tonight with Sigma to change the subject.
__________________________________________
The following Monday, Atsushi is escorted to school in Akutagawas black Mercedes. Because of this, his new boyfriend meets the infamous Odasaku, and Atsushi has genuinely never seen Akutagawa so afraid.
Just as he’s bullying the man about it, Kyouka decides to chip in with an ‘I told you so’, so Atsushi pipes down.
But as they walk into school, Atsushi finds he doesn’t really care about the gossiping of the students around him. Not at all. Because, though he doesn’t really know when the line between enemy and lovers blended, he couldn’t be any happier.
Especially not with his handsome, protective, utterly ridiculous Akutagawa right beside him.