Chapter Text
Remus was just finishing the last touch of today's dinner when the door to the flat creaked open.
The smile that blooms across his face is instant and embarrassingly wide. His heart does that fluttery thing Remus pretends he's grown out of, the thing that makes him feel seventeen again, standing in Hogwarts courtyard with Sirius Black's fingers laced through his for the very first time.
He can't believe that even though so many years have passed, he's still just like a lovestruck fool.
Their apartment is suspiciously quiet considering Sirius is back home. Most days, Sirius would announce his return like a soldier from war or a prince from exile. He would call out something like: "Darling, I've survived bureaucracy once more!" or "Moony, I've brought home the spoils of battle! Well... mostly ink stains." Sometimes he'd just shout "I'm home and still devastatingly handsome!". Sirius's greetings were mostly loud, and it was rare for him not to announce his presence dramatically.
Days like this happened though, quiet days without a sound, without a crash, usually when Sirius was planning something, when he returned with flowers, or when he was very tired. And today must have been one of those days.
Remus paused, the wooden spoon still in his hand. The walk from the door to the kitchen was short, ten steps (maybe twelve if Sirius was being theatrical). It shouldn't take this long and that made Remus frown.
It was one thing that Sirius returned quietly, and another that he didn't immediately run to Remus like a dog upon seeing his favorite person. It was starting to get worrying, but before Remus could speak up, call out: "You alright there, Cariad?", or turn around, he already felt arms wraping around his waist, body pressed gently to his back, forehead resting against his shoulder.
"There you are," he murmured, smiling as he set the spoon down. Sirius was home, he was close and that made everything fall into place, everything was fine. "Hello, you."
Sirius didn't answer right away, he tightened his arms around Remus's waist and sways them both side to side slow and aimless. His fingers curled into the fabric of Remus's sweater like he's anchoring himself.
"Hi, Moons," he said at last, Remus felt Sirius's smile grow even though he couldn't see it. It was comforting to know that Sirius was just as smitten as Remus, if not more so.
There was something in the way Sirius leaned on him, all boneless and heavy, like gravity had gotten stronger, but Remus didn't mind, he turned in the embrace, ready to kiss Sirius hello, to show off the pasta, to bask in the ridiculous joy of being twenty-four and in love and pretending he knew how life worked.
Sirius's eyes were a little too dazed, his smile a little too slow. Remus, still smiling, still holding him close, felt the first flicker of something he couldn't quite name. Not worry, not yet.
"Long day?" Remus cradled Sirius's face like he was checking for cracks. His thumbs brushed over pale cheeks, tracing the exhaustion written there in soft shadows.
It's not often that Sirius comes home from work so tired but this week was terribly difficult, Sirius got a task from his boss... Only Merlin knows how Sirius invented a spell that the Charms Department had been working on for months in just four days, and what's more, he accomplished it practically flawlessly. Well, maybe that's why Sirius worked there - if something was impossible, Sirius made it possible.
Sirius hummed, eyes fluttering shut as Remus leaned in to capture his lips in a kiss, that sweet, gentle, grounding one. When they parted, Sirius blinked at him delighted, and then grinned so wide it nearly split his face.
"You made us dinner," he said amazed, like Remus had conjured a feast from thin air. "You, Remus John Lupin, you made a meal. Like a real one, with ingredients, and heat?"
"I did, I'm incredible," Remus grinned proud and smug. They didn't cook often, well... Remus didn't cook often.
Shockingly, Sirius was the one who cooked more, three years ago he discovered his passion for cooking, and he made it everyone's problem. Sirius forced all their friends to share all the different recipes they knew and any cooking tips that they could think of. Effie took it upon herself to sit in the kitchen with Sirius for long hours, and Remus became the taste tester and a connoisseur of his boyfriend's creations.
After two weeks of culinary failures, Sirius was actually quite good, by now he was amazing, his skills were really high, he could make and prepare every possible meal, even some of the muggle ones. Well, all that didn't change the fact that the two of them lived mainly off the food Hope forced upon them whenever they visited and the leftovers Effie used to send them quite often.
A meal like today's one was a rare treasure.
They didn't have much free time, between Sirius's work, Remus's studies, and frequent visits to family and friends, they had very little time left just for themselves, all the evenings and weekends they had together they much preferred to spend in other ways than cooking, it was better to occupy their time with each other than dinner, really.
"You know," Sirius started eyes sparkling with mischief. "I made an excellent deal proposing to you." Remus arches a brow at that, already bracing for nonsense.
"Oh? Do enlighten me," Remus bit back a smile. Sirius's grin grow bigger.
"I've secured myself a domestic chef, a culinary genius, for life!" He announced as he let out a theatrical sigh. Remus gasps loudly and placed a hand to his chest, scandalized.
"If I'd known this engagement was just a ploy to trap me in a life of cooking, I'd have run screaming," he declared seriously. He couldn't help the fact that drama was communicable disease in this household (Sirius was patient zero). "Is that what it is? Seven years of devotion and you were only after my pasta?" Remus pulls back just enough to glare at Sirius, though the corners of his mouth keep trying to betray him.
"The pasta is very good," Sirius nodded then laughed, full and bright. He leaned in and kissed Remus again, harder this time, hands in his hair, mouth warm and insistent. "You've caught my contagious drama," he whispered against his lips.
"I'm doomed," Remus smiled into the kiss.
They kissed again, still in the embrace, Sirius's arms locked around Remus. The hug has gone on long enough that Remus's back is starting to protest, but he doesn't mind, not really. Sirius's warmth is lovely.
Still... the pasta smells really good.
"Pads," Remus shifted trying to ease out of the embrace. "If you don't let go, we'll never got to eat," he murmured, amused. "Don't you wanna try the pasta? It's getting cold," Remus sighed before pressing a kiss to the top of Sirius's head. Sirius lifts his head just enough to look at Remus, his eyes heavy with devotion.
"Of course I want to try it, this heroic sacrifice of yours must be honored," Sirius says solemnly. Remus snorted at the 'sacrifice' because it's just dinner after all.
"Yeah, well, I'd appreciate being allowed to breath long enough to serve it," Remus raised a brow amused waiting for Sirius to loosen his grip. Sirius did and took a step back, though he kept one hand on Remus's sleeve.
"Go on then," Sirius noded as if granting permission. "Led the way to your masterpiece," he grined. Remus rolled his eyes but he's smiling as he carries the plates to the table. Sirius follows close behind.
They settle into the chairs, knees almost touching beneath the table. Remus barely has time to adjust his napkin before Sirius's foot finds him, not even nudging him, just resting there, just a warm steady point of contact. As if Sirius needs the reassurance that Remus is still right there.
Remus glanced up, amused as Sirius pretends not to notice he's been caught (the pink at the tips of his ears gives him away).
And then there's the hand... every time Remus reaches for his fork Sirius's fingers brush his knuckles, like he's checking, again and again, that Remus is real, still there, still his. Remus doesn't pull away, he just lets the corners of his mouth curl into a soft smile. Sirius is clingy tonight, more than usual but it's gentle and warm and quiet and almost childlike in its simplicity and so... Remus can't bring himself to mind.
Sirius has bearly swallowed the first bite before making a delighted noise as if he were tasting joy itself.
"Moons," Sirius says already reaching for another forkful. "You're magic, this is- Merlin, this is so good," he declared. Remus's cheeks got warm traitorously as he ducked his head down to hide his reaction form Sirius (it didn't work anyway).
"Flattery won't get you out of doing the dishes," he murmured.
"Worth it," Sirius grins.
Remus managed to take two bites before Sirius hummed in a way that meant he had something to say, nothing new really. Sirius Black has never tolerated a quiet dinner in his life.
"So," Sirius said, leaning forward, eyes bright despite the exhaustion tugging at them. "How was study today, Professor Lupin?" Sirius wiggled his eyebrows.
"Don't call me that," Remus groaned. Sirius and their friends decided to torment him by calling him "professor" constantly, Remus hated it (he didn't).
"But you will be one! You should get used to that title," Sirius teased, Remus just snorts.
"Study was boring, mind-numbing and I swear my brain tried to escape through my ears at one point," Remus sighed, answering the question Sirius asked earlier.
"Tragic," Sirius gasps softly, scandalized.
Remus shrugs then leans in a little, voice dropping into that conspiratorial tone that means gossip incoming. He knew Sirius loved it. Remus shared with him every new drama that came out during or between lectures at the university.
"You know Professor Wimpelton? The one with the ridiculous long mustache?" He asked, Sirius nods. Of course he knew him, he was the professor that Remus told him the most about, he was actually the most problematic of all the professors Remus had faced. "He's gone bald."
"What?" Sirius freezes mid-bite.
"Completely bald," Remus noded seriously. "He got bald overnight and no one knows why. There's bets going around, either he went white and panicked or he's dying." Remus was betting on his hair turning grey, he definitely didn't know how to use the dye so he became bald instead.
"Poor man," Sirius gasps loudly, Because for Sirius, there was nothing worse than going bald, so of course he considered it everyone's personal tragedy. He almost fainted when Mary told him he looked like he had a predisposition to receding hairlines. It was an interesting month after that... full of ridiculously expensive serums and special lotions and potions.
"Alright love," Remus rolled his eyes fondly. "What about you? Did the Ministry survive your presence today?"
Sirius blinked slowly, like the question had to travel a long way to reach him, but then his eyes light up like someone's cast Lumos directly behind them.
"Oh, Moons," he said, laughing already. "You wouldn't believe."
Remus raised an eyebrow, already bracing himself, because that tone, that gleeful breathless I've been waiting all day to tell you this tone means Sirius has a good story, story involving chaos and questionable decisions.
"Hit me with it," Remus gives him his full attention. He loved all the stories Sirius brought home from work.
"There was a mishap in the Department of Magical Accidents today," Sirius leans forward grinning. "Someone left a wand in storage room that was absolutely stuffed with leftovers spells. And get this," Sirius made a dramatic pause because, of course. "The newbie didn't check the core!"
"Oh no, that already sounds bad," Remus winced. An Accident Department and an unstable wand? This couldn't end well.
"Oh yes!" Sirius chuckled. "It was dragon heartstring, which- unstable as hell. The second he picked it up the whole room went flying. The wand screamed, like actually, it did, I heard it and the whole department just," he made an explosive gesture with both hands. "Boom! Mild explosions, desks flipping, papers flying, spells everywhere. Pure chaos."
"Pads that's- Merlin that's awful," Remus is already laughing. "But also that's exactly what I imagine a normal day looks like in Magical Accidents," he snorts.
"Exactly!" Sirius beams delighted. "That's what I said! Everyone acted shocked but honestly? If something doesn't explode once a week, I get suspicious."
"Tell me more," Remus urges curious about the failure of the week.
"The wand goes off again and again, and Moons, listen to this- suddenly I'm on the ceiling, just dangling there like a chandelier!"
"You were on the ceiling?" Remus gasped, he imagined Sirius flying there and laughed a little.
"Yup," Sirius said proudly. "For a whole minute, maybe more."
"Sirius, are you- are you alright?" Remus laughs as he ask it because honestly what else can he do? This is Sirius, this is ministry, this is... their life.
"I'm fine," Sirius grins waving his hand dismissively. "Bit floaty still, might've inhaled some spell residue, but I'm fine I promise."
"Allright," Remus rolls his eyes but he's smiling hopelessly thinking Yes, this is the one, yes, this is the man I choose to love forever.
After diner the kitchen settles into warm domestic hush. Sirius flicks his wand lazily and the dishes float into the sink, the washing charm activating with a cheerful little whirr. He leans against the counter as if the spell took more effort than it should have. Remus notices of course but he chalks it up to exhaustion. It was a long day after all.
"There's enough for tommorow," Remus hummed, packing the leftover pasta into container and sliding the lid on.
The washing charm finishes with a soft chime, the kitchen is clean. It's too early for bed but too late for anything productive and that means it's exactly the right moment for sofa.
Sirius sinks into it first, Remus follows letting himself be pulled in until they're a tangle of limbs and warmth. Sirius curls in immediately. Remus's fingers slide into Sirius's hair without thinking and Sirius melts, actually melts, his shoulders drooping and whole body going pliant against his lover.
Remus doesn't comment on it, doesn't even smile to widely, he just holds him. He knows the version of Sirius, the one that comes home frayed at the edges, magic still buzzing all over him, the one who needs touch like oxygen.
When Remus brushed his lips against Sirius's temple, he sighs and presses closer tucking his face into Remus's chest. Remus presses another kiss to his temple just because he can and because Sirius sighs like it mends something invisible.
"So?" Remus murmurs voice low. "What are our plans for tomorrow? You mentioned visiting Regulus at some point?"
Sirius planned to visit Regulus in the next few days, as his baby brother was alone since James left for a week-long Quidditch training abroad yesterday. Sirius knew how much his younger brother hated being alone, so he wanted to keep him company, he was lovely like that. The weekend was the perfect opportunity to meet up, and also Regulus had to give back Sirius's sunglasses, the one he had stolen from his brother not so long ago, hoping that Sirius wouldn't notice - that was also a reason to meet up.
"Mm, yeah, I did say that," Sirius hums sleepily. "I wanna see him, maybe we'll invite him for Sunday dinner?" He suggested, Remus nodded because it was a good idea. "For now all I want is to stay right here, with you. Rooting in love until Monday," he mumbles eyes half closed already.
"Rotting in love, huh?" Remus laughs softly brushing his thumb along Sirius's cheek.
"Deeply, tragically," Sirius agreed solemnly. "I'm to tired to be a functioning adult, tomorrow I'll bounce back, for sure," he assured but it doesn't seem like it really. Remus didn't mind, he would happily stay and cuddle with Sirius all weekend if needed.
"Tonight, you're staying right here," Remus hummed and Sirius huffs softly enjoying the warmth Remus gives him.
"But! We shoud do something cool this weekend," Sirius said sounding much more awake now. "Something fun, something date-y."
"Oh?" Remus raised an eyebrow even if Sirius couldn't see it.
"Yeah, I've got a date planed," Sirius grins against Remus's chest.
"A date?" Remus echoes amused. "With who?" He teased.
"My Moony," Sirius declared smug yet sleepy. "But it's a secret, you'll have to wait and find out."
"You never fail to amaze me," Remus huffs a soft laugh and Sirius tilts his head just enough to meet Remus's eyes.
"Good, I plan to amaze you forever," he whispers and Remus kisses him. If that's how the weekend begins Remus can't wait for the rest of it.
As the night crept in, the flat is queit, the only sounds are the soft rustle of Remus turning a page and Sirius's breathing already drifting toward sleep. When Remus finished his chapter he closes the book and glanced at the clock.
"Are you planning on showering tonight?" Remus nudges Sirius softly, there's still that faint shimmer on his skin, spelldust catching the light but Remus doesn't mind, it looks almost pretty.
"Heartless," Sirius groaned as if Remus asked him to climb a mountain. "Why do you demand hygiene from me?" He mumbles miserable into Remus's shirt.
"You know the rules. No shower, no bed," Remus only shrugs.
Sirius does know the rules, because they're his. He's the one who insisted on them: no stray magic in bed, no spell dust on sheets, no collapsing into sleep still shimering like a cursed Christmas ornament. Sirius declared their bed sacred and as much as Remus wouldn't mind they go to bed right away he knows Sirius will mind.
"I'll go," he said eventually, and then lifted his head just enough to wiggle his eyebrows. "But only if you join me, Moons."
"You're incorrigible," Remus rolled his eyes.
"I'm romantic," Sirius said, but then he sighed. "Seriously though, Moons..." He mumbled eyes half-closed. "I don't think I can be trusted to stand for more than half a minute."
Remus frowned, the smile slipping just slightly, enough to show the shift inside him from fond amusement to quiet concern. He didn't say anything right away. Just looked down at Sirius, studying the way his eyes blinked slowly, the way his limbs seemed heavier than usual and the floatiness he mentioned earlier.
"Are you just being dramatic," he asked gently. "Or is something actually wrong?"
Sirius didn't answer with words. He pushed himself up, slowly, carefully, and stood... he wobbled. Remus was on his feet in an instant, hands steadying him before Sirius could even sway.
"Alright, no shower," he said, voice firm but gentle. "I'm running you a bath."
"You're a hero," Sirius blinked at him dazed and grateful.
"I know," Remus kissed his temple.
He guided Sirius to the bathroom, heart ticking a little faster now, it's not panic, not even fear, just the quiet something's off that won't let up.
The bath steamed gently, scented with lavender and something vaguely citrus, Sirius lay half-submerged, hair damp, eyes half-closed like he was dissolving into the water. Remus sat on the edge of the tub, sleeves rolled up, fingers trailing lazily through Sirius's hair, he works through the familiar routine.
"You know," Sirius murmured, soft and queit. "I think some of those spells hit me." At that Remus's hand stilled.
"From the mishap?" His heart skipped, a sharp little jolt that hurt.
"Yeah," Sirius nods, eyes drifting shut again. "It was chaos, proper one. I think one clipped me. Or maybe two," he admitted.
Remus's stomach tightened, he knows... he knows he shouldn't stress. If anything serious happened, the Ministry would've kept Sirius for observation or send him to St. Mungo's, they're really strict about that. The familiar tug of worry won't disappear anyway.
"You should've said something earlier," Remus murmured trying not to sound too sharp, but he was already panicking a little.
"Didin't want to ruin the evening," Sirius offered a lopsided smile. "And I'm fine really, just floaty. I'll sleep it off, it's nothing big," he assures.
Remus knows Sirius is probably right, he knows the Ministry wouldn't have let him walk out if there was any real danger. He knows if anything was really wrong Sirius will react, Remus should trust his instincts.
"I'll tell you if anything feels worse," Sirius promised, calming Remus down a bit.
Soon enough they lay in bed with the lights low and the window cracked open just enough to let in the cool night air. Sirius was curled against Remus's side like he belonged there, which, of course, he did. He was tracing slow fading patterns on Remus's chest.
Remus glanced down at him, Sirius looked peaceful, bit flushed from the bath. He also looked young, softer than usual and... almost fragile, in a way Sirius Black never was.
Remus's mind won't settle it keeps looping, circling, snagging on the same thoughts, he lies there with his eyes open, feeling his lover warm breath against his skin, he keeps one hand on Sirius's back, thumb moving in slow circles.
That spells, that mishap, the way Sirius had said it, half-laughing, like it was nothing. Like being hit with stray magic was just another Thursday... It probably was... This wasn't the first time Sirius had come home with a magical hangover, and it wouldn't be the last.
Tonight something feels different, off, a half-step away from normal. Sure it could be exhaustion, it should be, Sirius had a long week and a chaotic day and well he always gets clingy when he's worn thin. Remus knows the pattern. He tries to reason with himself, because if it was serious the Ministry wouldn't let Sirius leave, if it was dangerous Sirius wouldn't laugh while telling the story, Remus knows all that, but he can't stop thinking: is Sirius alright?
Sirius shifted, nuzzling closer, Remus tightened his arm around him protectively without really meaning to.
"Love you," Sirius whispered.
"Love you more," Remus whispered back and pressed a kiss to Sirius's hair.
Remus told himself it's fine, he told himself Sirius is fine and that he's just overthinking. But... his eyes stayed open, he stayed awake a little longer listening to Sirius breathe, keeping him close and safe (even if just from the shadows of Remus's own worry).
Tommorow everything will be better, everything will be back to normal, for sure - Remus thinks as sleep finally found him too.
(Oh how little did he knew)