Chapter Text
They never said hello.
Even in the very beginning, the most common greeting was too ordinary for the two of them.
They bumped into each other for the first time in the company hallway, their gazes met and locked. Warm caramel on auburn brown, a connection was established almost immediately. Chanyeol was the first to smile, wide and goofy, full of energy – It was both an offer and an invitation. After a second of hesitation, Baekhyun allowed himself to smile back. Shy but sweet; it was a marker of his acceptance of the friendship potential laid out before him.
From there it started. A tiny spark of friendship weaker than candle light. Barely enough to be noticed, let alone provide warmth. Yet it was real, something that shall become increasingly rare in their lives now that they had chosen the path of fame. So they both held on to it, nurtured it without thinking. As the consequence, that tiny speck of light turned into a full grown flame. Their greetings turned from smiles into waves. Then playful swats and bumps to the side. Their laughter became familiar to each other, to the point where the absence of those cheerful sounds would be a cause of confusion and concern.
For a while that was enough, but then greed came.
One night, anger and alcohol acted like a fierce gust of wind that swept across their flame. Baekhyun thought it was over, they were over. Fate, however, had different plans. Instead of extinguishing the flame that was their affection, the wind encouraged its spread into a wild fire. Hot was Chanyeol’s breath against his neck. Burning were those hands gripping his hips. There, pressed against the cool stone tiles of the bathroom floor, Baekhyun felt for the true, scorching intensity that came with lust. Yet he was unalarmed. With half lidded eyes and trembling arms, he drew Chanyeol closer, calling out with broken words of needs and wants until they were one in the fiery pit of hell.
They did not speak of love, yet something was there in their eyes when their fingers laced during moments of their forbidden tryst. When they lay in bed together, with their chests touching and heart racing, it felt like perfection.
Yet secrets were meant to be exposed, just as promises were destined to be broken.
One day, many months from their first night, they were called into the office. Chanyeol walked in first and was immediately greeted by a thick envelope slapped into his face. He stumbled and fell, nearly landing on Baekhyun, who was right on his heel. The yellow envelope hit the floor as Chanyeol did, its contents scattering across the carpet. Baekhyun knelt down, picking up the photo closest to his foot. It wasn’t as scandalous as their manager’s expression suggested. In fact, some might even call it innocent. Only a kissed, shared between two people who looked like they were among the happiest of the world.
There was no way to hide it. Baekhyun realized right away. Anyone with eyes could tell what was going on. This was their love, captured by unknown onlookers and spread out for the world to see.
Chanyeol didn’t get up. He too, had his eyes glued to the photos around him. His lips parted for a moment as if with the intention to speak, but words never came.
Tension gathered in the air as the eyes of their managers grew colder.
Still Chanyeol said nothing. He remained still, face paled and brows stitched together. His fists clenched and released. The right thing to do here was fairly obvious, and for once, it wasn’t oblivion that held him back.
He looked so different without his usual dorky smile, Baekhyun noticed. Was he afraid? He should be. This was their career on the line. Everything they worked for in the past years. All the pain they suffered practicing, all the time they invested on stage. The family they left behind and the parts of themselves that they buried. All for this, and now they might lose it, just because the two of them couldn’t hold back what countless other idols had to.
Baekhyun took a deep breath, and then he did what he needed to do.
He apologized. Pleaded. Promised.
Eyes were turned to Chanyeol after in expectation. The rapper, after giving Baekhyun a look that the other will never be able to forget in this life time, made the same plea and promise as his fellow EXO member. Childish stubbornness prevented him from apologizing, though. He waited until the managers left before stepping out, slamming the door behind him and leaving Baekhyun to clean up the photographic mess on the ground.
I did it for us.
Baekhyun’s tears were free to fall once he was alone.
I took the burden of making this decision, so you didn't have to.
Because, Park Chanyeol, I think I love you.