Work Text:
“Home sweet home.”
Rouge thumped down on the balcony of her apartment around 9PM with a sigh of relief, happy to be here and able to do a whole lot of nothing. That might seem a little strange to you if you thought about it too hard; a globetrotting super thief is the sort of profession you can’t imagine not working 24/7. Pulling heists, making deals in smoky casinos, sneaking and seducing and… Well, you get the picture. But it’s the wrong picture. There is a certain level of tiredness you can reach where “home sweet home” becomes the most magical phrase in the world, no matter who you were.
Her phone buzzed. The bat lazily pulled it free from her pocket giving it a look. More looking right through it, really. Familiar number. Familiar blunt style that somehow managed to convey itself through just one word.
Rouge.
“Already? He just can’t get enough of me, can he?” She shook her head and slipped back where it came from. Not in the mood for that conversation just yet. Instead, Rouge rubbed at one of her shoulders, a shoulder and trying to work a kink out of one of her wings as she scanned the studio with half-lidded eyes. Her path brought her over to the front door (which she very pointedly refused to use as a matter of principle, why wait for elevators when you could fly?) and a stack of unopened mail lying beneath the slot on it. She scooped up the fifteen or so unopened envelopes and made her way over to the kitchen island.
“Did you miss momma while she was away?” Rouge spoke aloud, thumbing through the envelopes in her palm. She was talking to, of course, a very green broad-leafed potted plant sat in the center. “Away for….?” She trailed off and looked up at the ceiling. How long had it been this time, again? A week? Two weeks, running around Spagonia and freezing her butt off in the snow at this time of year?
“You don’t know how lucky you are that you’re fake,” she lectured the extremely plastic piece of horticulture before throwing down the envelopes. Junk and bills. She had no time for such things, no more than she had time for watering plants. Who came up with bills, anyway? Money should be kept for yourself. To look at. Preferably in the form of gems and-
Again her phone buzzed. She plucked it from its place once more. The word quantity had, impressively, doubled.
Rouge. Answer.
“I really need to teach that man how to text. He’s about a step away from asking me what my favorite scary movie is.” Again the phone was stuffed away. Shadow did watch movies. It was hard to tell, with that super-soldier act he always did when they were on the job. Nothing scary though. Romances, typically. “Chick flicks,” they called them, though she’d never been terribly partial to them.
The inevitability of having to respond was making her a tad bit restless, and there was really only one cure for that when you were home. That wouldn’t do. She pulled a glass from where they were kept above her sink before fetching a bottle of red wine to match.
It was time to unwind. She pinched the stem of the glass and lazily aerated it as she walked. Her hips did not manage to maintain their usual exaggerated sashay as she wandered over to her couch and flumped down, kicking her boots off.
As of late, Rouge had felt stretched thin with her Team Dark duties. First it had been those mystery folks that had been creeping around swiping emeralds; they kept staying a step ahead of everyone, a long step, and she wasn’t proud to admit it. Really, it just wasn’t unfair! Almost like they were cheating and taking a peek at the future somehow.
The most recent job had gone a lot better. Protecting a museum from a gaggle of hoverboard-equipped bandits trying to swipe important cultural artifacts? That was exciting. Much more than following around gun toting GUN (hah hah) troopers. It let her stretch her legs. And even though the fiendish fowls were after some dusty old pottery that she found mostly just tacky, it gave her a chance to look at all the other interesting exhibits.
Buzz. She clicked her tongue and looked at her phone one last time.
I know you have it.
There were the magic words which finally necessitated a response. One thumb tapped out “Now what would give you that impression, Shadow?” As she did, she took her freshly poured wine into one hand and gave a tentative sip, stretching on her sofa and opting instead to scroll her social media. Little updates to her friends’ much less busy lives flitted past her vision. Momentarily, she was jealous, but delicious alcohol was numbing that. She rolled it around her mouth, letting the tannins conjure a dry tingle within. Rich. Luxurious. High quality. Who could blame her? She loved to spoil herself. What was the point of life if you couldn’t?
On her chest, at the end of a gold-and-diamond-studded loop, a fiery red ruby glinted in the dim sunset lighting of the apartment. Snatching that was an excellent example of spoiling herself. Spoiling and having fun to boot. It was only fair, right? After all the work she put in.
She’d have to call him, she supposed. He wasn’t taking the bait. First, though, this couch wasn’t enough; momma needed a nice hot bath. Actually… Why not kill two birds with one stone?
“Rouge? Are you there?” The gruff voice rumbled in her ear, a little tinny. Wherever he was didn’t have the best reception, if she had to guess.
“Well, yes . Who else would have hit the button to accept the call?” Rouge was quick to switch the call to speaker, propping her phone on the edge of the bathroom sink before turning back to her bathtub and starting the hot water.
“I see that now, but you didn’t say ‘hello’. Or anything. You just called and I heard laughing.”
“My, my. I’m getting etiquette lessons from Shadow the Hedgehog! First you interrupt my precious me-time, and now this?” She had gone about beginning to take off her blouse, nimbly moving from button to button before the rather form-fitting top flumped to the floor. There was a rather unusual stretch of silence as she did this, though eventually a hesitant Shadow spoke up.
“Um.” Okay, not really “spoke” so much as made a curious sound like he had something stuck in his throat.
“And now you’ve forgotten what you’re going to say.” Her hands began to work behind her back to finish the job of undressing her top half. “Maybe you should call back later and try again.”
She had to admit, she didn’t mind all that much no matter how much she was teasing him. Largely because, well… Teasing Shadow was stress relief all on its own. Tall, dark and handsome here was a frequent (and unwilling) little game she loved to play that pretty much boiled down to trying to fluster him. She rarely won, but that didn’t make it any less fun.
“I didn’t… Ugh. Nevermind. You know what the problem is. The museum staff took all of an hour after we left to find out the amulet was missing.”
She left her pants and underwear behind, carefully climbing over the edge of the tub which had begun to bubble up. The scent of rosewood oil had begun to fill the room and it was stealing away all the achey sensations from her, physical and mental.
“You keep saying ‘it.’ Never saying what ‘it’ is.” Water washed over her lower half, and she had to resist letting out a happy little groan. “I can hardly defend myself if I don’t know what I’m being charged with taking, now, can I?”
“The Amulet of Princes. The sacred antique piece of the Spagonian Crown Jewels.” Bone dry and unamused by this, he added after a pause. “That you’re wearing around your neck right now.”
“That is a very inflammatory and baseless accusation.” She didn’t bother to open her eyes, reaching over to her half-full wine glass and taking another sip. The bottom of it clinked gently against the ruby resting in her cleavage, just above the bathwater “But also a damned good guess.”
“It wasn’t a guess.”
“Then I guess you know me a little better than you let on, Shadow. I’m flattered.” She grinned, fangs glinting. She heard a grunt and a huff from the phone. Shadow never laughed, but that was the last thing in the world that would keep her from poking and prodding him with jokes.
“ Do you know how much hot water GUN. is going to be in if the Spagonian government finds out one of our agents-”
“Shadow, what if I told you that even if I did take it, I was just wondering how it’d look on me and I was always planning to bring it back? When I got around to it, I mean.” Tan legs crested the water and crossed, Rouge getting comfortable as she took another drink. “When I was in the neighborhood. If I remembered.”
“I’d say it doesn’t matter and you shouldn’t have done it in the first place,” was the predictable answer he gave. “Don’t just casually start up international incidents.”
“And what if I also said that I don’t really feel sorry for our employers when they were very much aware they hired a jewel thief and keep giving me jobs to protect things in the general vicinity of jewels?”
“If all you cared about was stealing, GUN wouldn’t work with you. And neither would I.” His voice lowered, and just for a flicker, she could hear a miniscule degree of softness in it. “You’re better than that.”
Rouge paused,wine halfway to her lips. And then, stuffing away the mild warmth hearing that made her feel into a very secret and special place, she shut one eye as she took that drink: “Aww…You really think that? About a rotten thief like me?”
“You aren’t going to fish more compliments out of me,” Shadow said flatly. Oh, boo. But they felt so nice!
Still, she’d had her fun and summarily been called on said fun. She supposed there was no choice but to give in. “All right, all right. You’ve made your point. I’ll give it back. When I get the chance.”
“As soon as you can,” the hedgehog stressed.
“When I can. I just got home. This old necklace can survive a little longer until I can get to the post office.” She smirked. “Unless you’re planning to swing by and take it off yourself…”
“Pass.” Of course. The smirk broadened, another little pick-away at the grumpy hedgehog loading itself up before it was interrupted. “Go as soon as you’re finished with your bath.”
Rouge’s lips pursed and her head tilted: “Was I being that loud?”
“… Do you really not realize what you did?”
The bat blinked, and for the first time her eyes were drawn over to the phone she’d left propped up on the sink. On the screen, pointed (very much by accident) towards the tub, a stony-faced Shadow the Hedgehog rather dramatically off to the side. Her mouth opened slightly, then a little more, then a full on gawp. “I… Why is it-“
“You probably hit the video call button by mistake.”
“And you didn’t say anything?!” Rouge huffed, dipping herself a little deeper below the water.
“I, um.” The trademark dagger-glare was interrupted. The tough guy arm cross he loved to do was a little less effective when he was blushing. “Thought… If it was an accident, saying something would be rude. And if it wasn’t, calling it an accident would be rude.”
“....”
“So I’ve just been staring at a wall since your shirt came off.”
This man. Honestly. Constantly doing ridiculous things, but always a little too adorable when you call him out to actually get mad at him. What were you to do except reluctantly smile as she was doing now?
“So, uh.”
“Hang up, you lunkhead. So I don’t have to get out of the water.”
“Are you going to send the jewels back-“
“Yes, I’m going to. After the bath. Talk to you later, Shadow. Hopefully with more clothes on next time.”
“Mmm.” Mission complete, as far as he was concerned. The accidental video feed flicked off, leaving Rouge with her bath and her jewels. The bat let out a long breath before slouching in the tub, mouth momentarily dipping underwater. Most anyone else, she would have been mad at such a thickheaded response to her mistake. Shadow, though…? He was too much of a good boy under all the brooding to lie about his intentions. So tough, but so innocent. It was hard not to let it drive her crazy.
Ah, well. The blushing in his face at the end softened the blow of losing her brand new accessory in such short order.
“On one hand, only ever calls when he wants something.” She finished her wine and closed her eyes, returning to the business of relaxation. If only for a few minutes more. On the other hand? Well, I suppose if he’s that cute when he blushes… I ought to misbehave a little more often.”