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“What happened to you?” Rowan had stopped eating, silverware cast aside as he stared at his meal. It was some cut of meat from something he didn’t bother asking about with a medley of vegetable and lentil side dishes that would have taken the cook hours to prepare. It disgusted him. He yearned for something horrible for him with enough salt to paralyze an elephant.
Anubis didn’t pause as the question was asked, simply cutting into his prey and taking a bite before responding.
“A lot of things have happened to me, darling. You'll need to be more specific."
It was bait. They both knew it was, Anubis only called him pet names when trying to provoke a reaction. Rowan would not rise to it, not with the exhaustion of a week's emotional turmoil settling into him.
“Why are you like this?” Rowan spoke firmly, hands moving to his lap to dig into his thighs. It was rude to have your elbows on the table after all. “I can’t stop thinking about how you used to look like a…..a person.”
That was what gave Anubis pause. He set his own cutlery down, patting his mouth dry with a ridiculous fabric napkin that Rowan hated so much. He let no shock show that Rowan has ended up finding pictures of himself when he was a young man, lean and gothic and an addict who spent more time high than aware. It was bound to happen eventually after so much time together.
He stayed silent. He was thinking hard enough that Rowan could almost feel the gears turn in his mind.
“I wasn’t willing to risk my own death for something I didn't care about. As much as I mourned my friends at the time I stopped feeling anything for it. Why keep taking drugs and harming myself for people and experiences who meant nothing to me.”