Chapter Text
Chase calmly sat in his vehicle mode, idling while waiting for the Chief to return from making sure the day's report had uploaded to his office computer and for the others to return from their duties. Heatwave and Kade were the first to arrive, still smoking from a lab fire that afternoon. Kade hopped out as soon as they pulled in and Heatwave transformed barely a nanoklik after his human partner had exited.
"Ugh!" Heatwave grunted. Popping the doors on his torso open, he leaned from side to side, hopping a little as he did.
"Hey Heatwave, what're you doing?" Dani asked, sliding down the pole from the roof. The glare Heatwave shot at Kade from across the garage could've melted tungsten.
"I'm trying to get the food scrap Kade left in my cab out," Heatwave growled. Awkwardly, he reached around his own door to scratch at his floorboards. He shook an empty soda bottle loose, making a 'pop' as it bounced off the concrete, and a hamburger wrapper floated quietly out beside it.
"I'm not sure if some whiners have realized it," Kade announced from the other side of the garage, hanging his fire coat in his locker, his undershirt sweat-stained and his face ash-blackened, "But we had a busy day and I didn't have time to stop, I had to eat on the go, so maybe you should stop complaining already-"
"-well I can already feel your disgusting organic crumbs starting to decay, so maybe-"
"-what do you want me to do, vacuum you? I clean me, you clean yourself, I'm tired, that's all I'm saying about it-"
"-I'm just saying a little consideration when you're inside me wouldn't go amiss, that's all I'm saying!" Heatwave snarled. Kade whirled around to face him, an odd look on his face, and he burst out with a bark of laughter.
"Oh my god dude," Kade said, snickering, "Phrasing."
"How else should I phrase it?" Heatwave asked, irritable and now a little confused, "You're literally inside me- you too, Dani!?"
"Sorry, sorry, that's just- it's weird and funny," Dani snickered.
"What're you guys laughing about?" Graham asked as he and Boulder walked in, leaving wet tracks from having washed off the worst of the dirt from his blade.
"Heatwave wants me to be gentle with him," Kade snickered.
"No, I want you to not leave a fragging mess when you come inside me with- what the frag is wrong with all of you!" Kade and Dani were hysterical with laughter, and Graham had turned ruby red, covering his face with his hands.
"I don't get it either," Boulder said, "That seems pretty reasonable to me."
"I'm not explaining this," Graham said, power walking across the garage towards the entrance to the Burns' house, still hiding his face with his hands, "I'm not explaining, I'm not explaining, you are both terrible people, I'm not explaining-"
"Not explaining what?" Chief Burns asked, practically opening the door in Graham's face.
"Ooh, did I miss a joke? A prank? Oh my gosh, is it 'August Fools Day'? Can I join in?" Blades asked excitedly from the vehicle lift, descending from the roof.
"You have missed nothing," Chase said, transforming. "From what I observed, Heatwave complained about Kade leaving detritus inside him, something about the way this complaint was phrased was humorous to Kade, and the situation escalated from there, for reasons unclear to me."
"Wow, that's really weird," Cody said, peeking around from behind his dad, "Are you okay Kade? Did you breath too much smoke?"
"I'll show you too much smoke, kiddo-"
"Graham, you and Cody go set the table- no complaining Cody, you can play with the bots after dinner," Chief said firmly. Cody sighed dramatically but didn't protest as his brother stepped past their father and guided him back up the stairs to the family's home. Chief Burns shut the door behind them, looking sternly at his other two children. "Now I think you owe Heatwave an apology."
"What! Aw, come on dad-"
"It doesn't take a genius to realize you were making a crass joke at your partner's expense, which is extremely unprofessional." The stare Chief Burns leveled at his eldest was unyielding. Kade groaned.
"Ugh, fine, whatever, I'm sorry for making fun of you," Kade grumbled, rolling his eyes.
"I don't want an apology, I want to know what's so slagging funny," Heatwave said.
"'Being inside' someone refers to an intimate act between humans. Kade was just being juvenile," Chief Burns said.
"What? Humans go inside each other? How does that work?" Blades asked, surprised.
"Indeed. The relative sizes alone make an act like that improbable. I am curious to know how such a thing is possible," Chase said.
"Oh man," Dani said, covering her face like Graham, "Dad, can I go help Graham and Cody with dinner?"
"You may," the Chief said, "And I take it you've learned your lesson about crude jokes on the job?"
"Yes," Dani said, tossing her flight helmet on top of the locker with a clatter as she jogged towards the door, leaving it ajar as she passed.
"Well don't look at me! I'm not giving the bots 'the talk,'" Kade said defensively. The Chief pinched the bridge of his nose.
"Just go shower off, and try to be professional at work."
"Okay, dad," Kade said, stomping past the Chief, shutting the door a little too forcefully.
"That doesn't even work as sarcasm since I'm actually his father," the Chief muttered.
"Does that mean you're going to talk to us?" Blades asked. Chief Burns sighed.
"I'm going to talk to Kade and the other kids about remembering to treat you all like people and to be considerate about your personal space," Chief Burns said. "If you really want to talk about human intimacy and it's euphemisms, you can talk to me in private. Is there anything else?"
"I still have some fries caught in my seat," Heatwave grumbled, "Do you think you could...?"
The Chief nodded, and Heatwave quickly transformed, leaving his doors opened. Chief Burns leaned in, his smaller hands nimbly picking the last bits of garbage out of Heatwave.
"Better?" he asked, throwing the trash away.
"Better," Heatwave said.
"My children's immaturity aside, you all did excellent work today. Have a good night." The Chief nodded, and took his leave. The bots made their way to the vehicle lift and lowered the platform.
"Sooo...? Are we gonna talk about it?" Blades asked excitedly.
"What's there to talk about," Heatwave said, stepping off the platform onto the bunker floor. He teeked of unreleased irritation and his optics were fixed on his sparring pole.
"Uh, hello?" Blades said, "Being inside another person is an act of intimacy for humans! This whole time we thought we were just working but we've actually been cuddling!"
"I don't think so," Boulder said thoughtfully. "Humans drive vehicles all the time and don't think anything about it."
"Sometimes they do! Like in movies or TV or songs, they call them 'sweetheart' and 'baby' and they love them... Oh my gosh, do you think I'm Dani's 'little deuce coupe'?"
"You're not a coupe, Blades."
"'Little deuce copter... you don't know what I've got-ter!'"
Boulder and Blades' laughter was broken by the crack of Heatwave's fist against the training pole as the firebot began a particularly frustrated training session.
"Aw, sorry Heatwave!" Blades called. "I'm sure Kade'll come around!"
"Chase is the luckiest out of all of us," Heatwave grumbled, "He and the Chief are different- Chief's always treated him like a person- he hasn't had to put up with half the slag we've had to."
"That's true," Chase said, a little surprised to realize it was, then feeling foolish for being surprised. More than an Earth-quartex into their assignment, and Dani and Blades were finally settling into a working rhythm, Blades getting the hang of flight and the human pilot easing off her punishing grip on his instruments. Since finding out Boulder was an engineer in his own right, Graham had seemed almost intimidated of him, and of course, the power struggle between Kade and Heatwave showed no sign of abating. But the Chief-
"Hey guys!" Cody called cheerfully, interrupting Chase's thoughts as he slid down the pole to the bunker. "Are you ready for movie night? Dani recommended me another pirate movie, and it's a musical!"
"Busy," Heatwave said, aiming a kick at the training pole.
"Did you finish your dinner?" Boulder asked.
"Ye-es," Cody said. Blades had already raced over to his favorite position against the couch and was turning on the tv, queuing up Netflix. "What about you Chase?"
"I... think I require recharge tonight, Cody. I wish you an enjoyable film," Chase said.
"Okay," Cody said. He leaned in and hugged the police bot's leg. "'Night Chase!"
Chase very carefully petted the human child's head with two fingers. "Good night, Cody," he said, watching as the boy scampered off to find a spot on the couch not obstructed by bot. The strains of human music started playing from the television, and the irregular thuds of Heatwave's fists on wood nearly covered the sounds of Chase's steps as he walked to the back room of the bunker. Their stasis pods were set up along the back wall. He felt agitated, his processor distracted by fragmentary thought trains. He needed a full defrag- that would set his coding straight.
And yet.
Irrationally, he found himself walking to the simple bunked berths Boulder had constructed one afternoon, suitable for light recharge. He lay down on the lower berth, shifting to align his joints along the slab, and let his processor wander. He was not sure why he was so agitated by Kade's comments. He knew, logically, that Boulder was correct. The humans viewed them as vehicles, and there was no special emotional significance to riding in vehicles. In this they were like Cybertronians, even though on Cybertron non-sentient transport hadn't been common till after the war began. Most in the transport caste had minimal sensors on their interiors in order to avoid discomfort or unnecessary stimulation, and mechs in the Rescue Bots size class used their interior to transport equipment, but almost never other mechs. The space that served as a cab in their Earth alt-modes was more of a crumple zone in their native forms to prevent their spark chambers or vital parts from being crushed by falling debris, with thick armor rather than open windows. Chase had assumed carrying his human partner was akin to carrying a forensic minicon to a crime scene. But it wasn't.
No, it wasn't Kade's joke that was bothering him- it was Heatwave's words. He and the Chief are different. The Chief had always treated him well, recognizing the cab as an extension of Chase's body but not shrinking from that knowledge. He was neither messy nor rough, a calm presence that guided Chase without dominating him, his hands resting on Chase's wheel, grip reassuringly firm but not controlling. It was unusual- like no relationship Chase had had previously, not even with Trigger- but, he allowed himself to acknowledge, it was very nice. The agitated feeling had returned, a restless excess of energy. The window on the left side of his torso rolled down almost of its own accord, and he jerked his helm around to check the door. No one was there, no one could've heard. His charge crackling higher with embarrassment, he awkwardly angled his arm to reach a servo inside. He pressed it against the seat, triggering pressure sensors, running it from headrest to base. As he traced his servo up again, he hesitated and diverted left, tugging at the safety belt. The synthetic straps that had once served to secure cargo had a small amount of charge to keep him cognizant of shifts. He pulled and released the strap that the Chief wore everyday, focusing his internal sensors on detecting the faint stimulation the belt generated. It wasn't even any one action, but rather the cascade of sense memories each one triggered that raised his charge. The memory of the weight of the Chief against him, his fingers on his sensors- and the irrational fantasy that these weren't mere practicalities, weren't even intimate acts, but were an Act of Intimacy, an opening, an invitation, a sign of want.
What he was doing was unprofessional, it was illogical, it was embarrassing, it was glitched- and yet as his fingers groped and traced at his auxiliary instruments inside, he couldn't stop his engine from revving as his EM field went wild, surface panels crackling with discharged static as his optics whited out in overload. Overwhelmed, the tangential thought trees finally shuttered, and his processor was able to fade black into recharge. His last thought was of hoping his teammates wouldn't be able to smell the ozone and know what he'd done.