Work Text:
The photo stared back at him like a mockery.
BaekHyun hadn’t meant to see it. Truthfully, he hadn’t even gone into his social media for a while. He had avoided it like the plague. His friends complained that he never reposted their stories or replied to the reels they sent him. And they were right.
For a long time, he had pretended that breaking up with his ex and ending on good terms had been easy. They stayed as “friends,” if they could even refer to each other that way. Simply acquaintances. SeulGi and he hadn’t kept much contact, but they still followed each other on Instagram.
And BaekHyun had just seen a photo that reminded him of how stuck he was in his life.
His ex looked radiant: she had a wide smile on her face and was hugging her boyfriend with the same tenderness she had once hugged BaekHyun with—except it wasn’t him. It was someone else, someone she posed with under the Christmas tree of the new house they had bought together, and BaekHyun couldn’t say he wasn’t feeling a lot of envy in that moment.
It wasn’t that he wanted to get back together with her—that wasn’t the point. He simply… missed that feeling of being loved, of loving. Of being important to someone, and of being able to give his love too. The reciprocity of a relationship.
“Wow, they look cute,” SeHun said, passing behind him.
BaekHyun hid his phone on his lap as if he’d been caught doing something wrong. SeHun was one of the people he had lied to, saying it didn’t bother him at all to have his ex on social media. There was no way he planned on telling him it was her—though his face probably said everything.
“Yeah, right? They’re some influencers I follow,” he lied shamelessly, locking his phone. He turned to look at his cubicle neighbor with a wide smile. “They look like the perfect couple.”
SeHun raised an eyebrow at him. He knew him well enough by now to know BaekHyun was full of shit. Still, he didn’t say anything and nodded, continuing on to the cubicle next door.
BaekHyun peeked over the divider between their cubicles and gave him another smile.
“What are you doing this Christmas?”
“I don’t know, I think I’ll go to the company party. What about you?”
“Yeah, me too,” he said. In reality, he hadn’t planned on it, but if SeHun was going, at least he wouldn’t end up standing like an idiot in a corner drinking cider. “Want to go together?”
“Sure.” SeHun smiled. BaekHyun was still leaning over the divider. “What’s wrong?”
BaekHyun stared at him. Why hadn’t SeHun called him out on his lie from earlier? They’d known each other for years—almost three years working together—and he could say they had enough trust to be honest with each other. It was strange that SeHun hadn’t said anything about it. Was he really just going to let it slide?
“Nothing,” he replied. His eyes wandered over his coworker’s handsome face, and he felt a little bad for making him go to the party with him. With a face like that, SeHun could invite anyone and no one would say no. “Thanks for agreeing.”
“You’re acting pretty weird today,” SeHun said. “Why are you thanking me?”
“You’re acting weird too!” BaekHyun exclaimed.
“Me? Why?”
“You saw the photo and didn’t say anything.”
“Because it’s your ex,” SeHun replied, as if it were obvious. “What do you want me to say?”
BaekHyun let out an almost indignant exclamation. He felt heat rush to his face.
“So you did know!”
SeHun rolled his eyes and turned his attention back to his computer.
“Don’t be so grumpy. Get back to work before we get in trouble.”
With a huff, BaekHyun sank into his cubicle chair and tried to focus on the screen. His eyes saw nothing. Why did he feel so embarrassed?
Maybe he hadn’t wanted SeHun to see a more vulnerable side of him. He always presented himself as cheerful and confident, and being the older of the two, he’d somehow wanted to set an example as his hyung. But there he was, feeling pathetic over his ex’s photo, and SeHun simply knew.
A company chat notification chimed on his computer. BaekHyun sighed and opened the private message he’d received.
It was SeHun.
OSH: You don’t have to pretend with anyone. Having your ex on social media sucks.
He bit his lip, feeling his stomach twist unpleasantly. The topic made him more anxious than he wanted to admit.
BBH: We said we’d stay friends. I’m just doing my part.
OSH: She’ll understand if you delete her.
Feeling bile rise in his throat, BaekHyun closed the chat and stood up to go to the bathroom. He had to pass by SeHun’s cubicle, and SeHun immediately turned in his chair and grabbed his hand before he could get any farther. His hand was warm. BaekHyun felt his skin burn under the touch.
“I’m sorry if I crossed a line,” SeHun said.
Swallowing, BaekHyun nodded and slowly pulled away, leaving without saying a word.
When he returned a few minutes later, there was a can of coffee on his desk with a post-it note stuck to it, a smiley face drawn on it.
After all, SeHun wasn’t the worst coworker.
***
JongDae, on the other hand, was the worst coworker of all.
“I don’t believe you.”
“Great! Then don’t believe me!”
“I mean, seriously? You’re going just as friends?” He lowered his voice to almost a whisper. “The whole office thinks you’ve been fucking for months.”
BaekHyun bit his lip hard to keep from swearing.
“And who started the rumor, may I ask?” he said, knowing full well it had clearly been JongDae, loudmouth that he was.
“I didn’t start anything. It slipped out once when I was drunk.” He shrugged, narrowly dodging the smack BaekHyun aimed at the back of his head. “But you are doing it, right?”
“No! We’re not—!”
The break room door opened, and speak of the devil, SeHun appeared with a distracted expression.
BaekHyun shot JongDae his deadliest glare. It clearly said: say something and I’ll cut your balls off.
The problem was that JongDae wasn’t afraid of anything—and he was a bastard.
“SeHun! Man of the hour. Tell me something, isn’t it true that you and BaekHyun are f—?”
“Planning to go to the company party together!” BaekHyun interrupted, elbowing him hard in the side. JongDae let out a groan that echoed through the small room. “I was telling him we’re going together.”
“You’re going too?” SeHun asked, walking over to the counter to make coffee. A cortado, with two spoonfuls of sugar, well stirred. BaekHyun had made him coffee so many times he knew exactly how he liked it.
“Nope. I’ve got a date,” JongDae replied, rubbing his side. “But you two are definitely going to have a great time without me.” He wiggled his eyebrows suggestively.
BaekHyun started pushing him toward the exit, praying he’d shut up. He managed to get JongDae out, and before he could turn back to say anything else, BaekHyun slammed the door in his face.
He turned around, leaning his back against the door to look at SeHun, who was watching him with his usual neutral expression. He took a sip of his coffee without breaking eye contact.
“What?” BaekHyun said, self-conscious.
“Did you do something to your hair?” SeHun asked, tilting his head slightly. “You look cute.”
At thirty years old, BaekHyun couldn’t say many things still made him blush easily. And yet, SeHun seemed to have acquired that new power.
“I didn’t style it today.” He lowered his gaze to his shoes. They needed polishing, and one of them had a stain. They suddenly became the most interesting thing in the room.
SeHun’s shoes appeared in his field of vision. He gently nudged the tip of BaekHyun’s shoe to get his attention, and BaekHyun looked up to find him closer than expected.
“Don’t feel pressured if you end up not wanting us to go together,” SeHun said softly. There was no need to speak loudly; it was just the two of them.
“It’s not that, it’s just… it’s my first Christmas alone.”
“You have me.”
“I mean I’ll be single.”
“And I mean you won’t be alone because you have me,” SeHun repeated, firmer than before.
BaekHyun felt his cheeks heat up again. The SeHun effect was wreaking havoc on him. Was he really implying that?
“That’s silly. We should go back,” he murmured. Without looking at him, he left the break room, unable to face the situation just yet.
He could feel SeHun’s gaze burning into the back of his neck, but he still wasn’t ready to confront what his words suggested.
¨***
Over the next few days, the weather grew colder, and along with it, the company filled the building with Christmas decorations.
BaekHyun did a great job of avoiding SeHun’s gaze during that time. The party was approaching quickly, and he was becoming an expert at avoiding his cubicle neighbor.
Obviously, SeHun had noticed. It wasn’t as if BaekHyun had been subtle. Still, he let the evasive attitude slide. BaekHyun wanted to believe SeHun associated it with his first Christmas single in years, and not with the fact that his words had caused chaos in his head.
He had to admit that despite knowing him for years, he had never imagined the possibility of something between them. Now, thanks to SeHun, a door had suddenly opened in his mind, and a tornado of impure thoughts rushed in. The idea intrigued and scared him. BaekHyun had zero experience with men.
“What are you thinking about?”
BaekHyun almost spat out all his coffee. He swallowed and started coughing, setting the cup down on his desk.
“Nothing!” he exclaimed, feeling his face about to catch fire.
SeHun gave him a sideways smile and leaned against the side of the cubicle with his arms crossed. His shirt stretched tight across his chest, emphasizing his pecs. BaekHyun stared longer than he’d like to admit.
A cough snapped him out of it. ChanYeol, who worked behind them and got along far too well with SeHun, was giving him a gotcha look. No wonder he and JongDae were the most annoying duo in the company.
“I feel like you’re nervous about the Christmas party,” SeHun said, oblivious to the silent war of looks. “I already told you there’s nothing you need to worry about.”
“I know.” He sighed, looking away. He began spinning his chair back and forth, restless.
SeHun placed a hand on the armrest of his chair and stopped it. Their eyes met.
“It’ll be fine, I promise,” he murmured softly.
BaekHyun felt like he couldn’t breathe. Still, he trusted SeHun. He knew it would be fine. Those dark but kind eyes had never lied to him.
***
A few days before the party, BaekHyun was lying on his bed with his phone, scrolling through reels. He’d been doing it for over an hour. He felt anxious, a knot in his stomach that wouldn’t leave him alone. This time, it wasn’t about SeHun. It was about his ex-girlfriend.
She had sent him a message wishing him happy holidays and a good end to the year. It was kind, short but sincere. BaekHyun checked her profile, the photos she had posted with her boyfriend, the man’s comments on her posts.
Why was he still in contact with her? Was it really necessary to maintain a bond that constantly made him anxious? He didn’t feel like it brought anything good into his life, and yet cutting it off after ending on good terms felt almost impossible. Like betraying a silent pact.
With his throat tight and his breathing shaky, he returned to SeulGi’s profile. He had loved her deeply, and their years together had been good, but it was enough. He didn’t want any more surprises. Seeing her face made his stomach hurt. He didn’t want to feel like this anymore. He had the right to move on in his own way, and staying tied to her—even through a stupid social network—wasn’t good for him.
Slowly, with a trembling finger, he pressed the “unfollow” button.
It felt like a weight lifting off his chest. His heart was still racing, but it was something. A step.
He locked his phone and stared at the dark ceiling. He could hear his heartbeat in his ears. Adrenaline threatened to consume him, but he was proud of himself. Maybe it wasn’t much, but for him, it was a huge step. He had finally taken the leap to leave behind something he should have walked away from a long time ago.
His kitten, Kira, jumped onto the bed and walked across his stomach to announce her presence. BaekHyun let out a soft chuckle and stroked her back.
“The world didn’t end after all,” he told the cat, who meowed in response.
The Earth kept spinning, and life continued on its course. He would too. He had to; more than that, he could. He was free to be happy.
***
His coworkers wouldn’t stop talking about the party. For the first time in a while, BaekHyun didn’t feel anxious thinking about it, or about going with SeHun.
During lunch, BaekHyun sat with him in the cafeteria. They talked about trivial things, but since he’d been ignoring SeHun over the past few days, he felt a little uncomfortable, knowing he owed him an apology.
He didn’t find the right moment to apologize until they shared an elevator ride, the cafeteria noise fading away. As the numbers on the panel climbed, BaekHyun took a breath.
“I’ve been acting like an idiot lately, and I wanted to apologize. I had too many things on my mind.”
SeHun shrugged, trying to downplay it.
“It’s fine. It’s understandable. You already told me this Christmas would be different for you. I didn’t want to make you uncomfortable.”
“You don’t make me uncomfortable,” BaekHyun replied immediately, wanting to erase that idea. “Actually, I’m excited about the party. It hasn’t happened in a long time. And I don’t think it’s silly to go with you. I didn’t mean that.”
The elevator doors opened on their floor. They both stepped out slowly, wanting to stretch the conversation a little longer before returning to the office.
SeHun, his hands in the pockets of his dress pants, stopped at the office entrance, making BaekHyun stop as well. The silence made his heart race for reasons he couldn’t quite explain.
“When you asked me to go together, I assumed you meant as friends,” SeHun said, clearly wanting to lay everything out in the open.
BaekHyun nodded. He wasn’t going to lie; nothing else had crossed his mind when he impulsively suggested it.
“But I don’t want us to go as friends,” SeHun added, his expression serious.
BaekHyun believed him. Heat spread from his chest up to his neck and cheeks. He was probably blushing. It had been a long time since he’d felt this way—his heart racing, his stomach tight with excitement and nerves.
“Neither do I,” he replied, breathless.
“Then… Can I be the one to invite you this time?”
Unable to speak, BaekHyun nodded enthusiastically. If SeHun wanted him, he would give himself willingly. The anticipation had him feeling like he might burst through the ceiling.
SeHun stepped closer and gently took his hand. BaekHyun almost choked on his own saliva. It was a minimal, innocent touch, and yet it made him incredibly nervous. That dormant feeling slowly began to wake inside him—a word he still couldn’t name, but it was there.
It amazed him to think that he had spent so much time beside SeHun and was only now realizing what he truly felt.
“Do you want to go to the party with me?”
Words felt unnecessary in that moment, so BaekHyun followed the first impulse of his heart: he stepped closer, rose onto his tiptoes, and kissed SeHun on the cheek.
“Yes, I do,” he finally whispered, smiling.
And if SeHun’s ears were red, that would be a secret just between the two of them.
***
SeHun’s house was nice. BaekHyun had no way to argue with that. It was decorated with Christmas ornaments from top to bottom on the front. It was almost ridiculous.
“Hi!” SeHun’s smile stretched from ear to ear. BaekHyun couldn’t say it bothered him. All he was missing were pointy ears to be a Christmas elf. BaekHyun couldn’t help letting out a small laugh. “No teasing, I didn’t invite you so you could laugh at me.”
“I’m sorry, it’s just that you look so… Christmassy,” he replied. Even though his clothes weren’t flashy at all—he was wearing an off-white sweater and black dress pants—his aura was very warm.
“I’ll take that as a compliment,” SeHun said, rolling his eyes. He stepped aside at the door to let him in.
Immediately, a white ball of fur launched itself at BaekHyun. He caught the little dog almost midair.
“Vivi!”
“Wow,” BaekHyun exclaimed, holding Vivi in his arms. SeHun’s French Bichon, whom he bragged about practically every day, squirmed happily in his grip, delighted to see him. “Who’s the prettiest dog? Yes, it’s you…”
“He doesn’t even get this excited when he sees me,” SeHun said with his arms crossed. There was a strange look on his face, and slowly, a smile formed. “Looks like he really likes you.”
“Just like his owner,” BaekHyun replied playfully.
“Yes.”
BaekHyun raised his eyebrows. “Yes”? Was he not going to say anything else? He felt warmer than it actually was. He’d probably blushed. With that in mind, he lowered Vivi to the floor, and the dog ran off through the living room, leaving them alone just like that—the traitor.
With an awkward twist of his mouth, BaekHyun looked around the living room. It looked cozy. SeHun fit right in. There was an open book on the couch.
“What are you reading?” he asked, just to fill the silence.
For some reason, SeHun was making him more nervous than usual. Maybe because they were going to the party together today? Was it really like that? They hadn’t even talked about whatever it was that was happening between them now. It was a tension that hadn’t been there before—or maybe it had, and he had deliberately ignored it.
“A self-help book someone gave me,” SeHun replied. “It’s entertaining, even if it’s not exactly my kind of book.”
“Books are hard to give as gifts.”
SeHun nodded. He walked over to the couch and leaned over the back to grab something. A bag. BaekHyun watched him, not quite understanding what was happening.
“I have a gift for you, even though it’s not a book,” SeHun said with a smile.
He stepped closer with the bag. When he stopped in front of him, BaekHyun had to tilt his head up to look at him. SeHun’s straight hair tangled with his eyelashes.
“You didn’t have to get me anything,” he murmured, taking the bag.
Inside was a white, fluffy scarf. BaekHyun picked it up slowly and smiled. It was very soft to the touch.
“I’ll wear it today.” He smiled, wrapping it around his neck. “It’s really nice… thank you, SeHun.”
Without saying anything, SeHun adjusted the scarf for him, his touch gentle and careful, never overstepping. Their skin didn’t even touch. Even so, BaekHyun felt it deep in his soul.
They looked at each other. There was a moment of silence, where neither of them moved—not even a little. It was as if time had stopped for an instant. BaekHyun felt short of breath, and he saw SeHun lean just slightly toward him. His heartbeat shot through the roof.
A bark made them both jump and pull apart, breaking the moment.
“Vivi! I told you to behave!”
The dog spun around twice, barked again, and ran off once more.
SeHun rolled his eyes and gave him an apologetic smile.
“I’m sorry, he does whatever he wants.”
“Just like his owner,” BaekHyun repeated.
SeHun burst out laughing. They exchanged a look that, in the silence, said absolutely everything—and yet neither of them dared to say a word.
***
The party was livelier than BaekHyun had expected. Even though it had nothing to do with the parties he’d gone to back when he was still in college, he couldn’t say it wasn’t fun. There were far more people than he’d anticipated, and alcohol flowed from one side to the other in glasses of cheap champagne.
No one found it strange that they arrived together. In fact, many coworkers from their floor came up to them right away to include them, offering them seats among tables full of canapés and other appetizers. ChanYeol, especially, was the first to grab BaekHyun and yell a “congratulations” into his ear.
BaekHyun danced all night with his coworkers, even with SeHun from time to time. They didn’t talk much, but that was fine; every now and then they’d look at each other and smile, checking how drunk the other one was. Every time they made eye contact, he felt like his heart was about to leap out of his mouth. Something had changed between them, and he needed to know if it was real.
Before he realized it, he was suffocating from the heat. The heating system wasn’t giving anyone a break, and people were fanning their faces.
BaekHyun grabbed his coat and stepped out into the building’s backyard. Some people were smoking and chatting animatedly, sitting on the small concrete benches that surrounded the outdoor Christmas tree, with its dazzling lights and shiny ornaments.
He settled onto a bench away from the other guests, hidden behind the tree. He didn’t really feel like talking or socializing. The music was still pounding in his ears.
He stared at the pattern of the tree lights turning on and off until he forgot about his surroundings. He felt much freer than he had felt all year. It was definitely a relief to know that even if he opened Instagram that night, he wouldn’t see anything from his ex anymore out of pure obligation. He had finally freed himself from that weight that had been tormenting him.
Still, a knot of nervousness twisted in his stomach when he thought about SeHun. Was there something between them? Or was it just his imagination? The thought made him quite anxious. He couldn’t deny that he felt attracted to the man, but since they had never made anything explicit about what was happening between them, the truth was that BaekHyun had no idea whether or not he was getting the wrong idea.
As if summoned by his thoughts, SeHun appeared from around the tree and walked over to him. Without saying anything, he sat down beside him on the bench, their arms barely brushing. SeHun’s ears were red from the cold, and when he spoke, a small cloud of vapor escaped his lips.
“I was looking for you,” he said, gazing at the tree. His face, lit by the colorful lights, looked beautiful on that clear night.
BaekHyun’s heart flipped when he realized his own thoughts. SeHun was beautiful. And even though he was his friend, deep down he wanted something more.
“It was really hot inside,” he said softly.
“I got scared when I didn’t see you. I thought you’d left… and I felt like an idiot for not telling you what I wanted to say.”
BaekHyun bit the inside of his cheek. He thought carefully about what to say. It felt like all of this had to mean something.
“But I’m here,” he finally said. “You found me.”
SeHun turned his head to look at him. His eyes were wide open, as if the statement had taken him by surprise.
“Really?” he asked, wanting to make sure he’d heard correctly.
“Yes. Really.”
“You leave me speechless… I really wanted to tell you that I like you a lot. And it’s kind of silly, because I’ve been waiting for years for the moment to tell you.”
BaekHyun felt his face heat up. There it was. The confession he’d been waiting for. He knew it couldn’t have been easy for SeHun to say that. He had to be brave too.
“I like you too. I’m sorry for being so slow… about everything. But now I’m free.”
SeHun smiled widely.
“I’m proud of you. I know it wasn’t easy.”
“Actually, it was, because I was thinking that I could be with you if I let go of everything that was weighing me down.”
Slowly, SeHun reached out and took BaekHyun’s hand. Their cold fingers intertwined immediately. They shared a smile, and BaekHyun felt warmth spread through his chest.
“Just so you know, there are some downsides to being with me,” SeHun said, gently stroking his knuckles.
BaekHyun leaned closer to him on the bench.
“Oh yeah? Like what?” he asked, amused.
SeHun’s expression was pure happiness.
“Vivi,” he explained. “He’s very possessive.”
“Then I’ll have to kiss you when he’s not looking.”
SeHun turned his body a little more to face him and lifted his chin with his free hand. His eyes shone. BaekHyun felt breathless at the sight.
“The other downside,” SeHun said, looking at his lips, his voice low and seductive, “is that I’m very possessive too.”
BaekHyun lost his breath at the declaration. His heart was pounding wildly.
“I don’t care if you are.”
“Then… would you go out with me?” he whispered.
With a smile, BaekHyun nodded.
“Yes, yes, and yes.”
His eyes lingered on SeHun’s lips, and before he realized it, he was leaning toward him, seeking that sweet contact.
He received it almost immediately. SeHun’s lips were warm. He kissed him with the same gentleness that defined him. Maybe SeHun wasn’t a man of many words, but that kiss made it clear to BaekHyun that his feelings were just as genuine as his own.
Fireworks began a few moments later. Hand in hand, they both watched the sky explode in many colors, just like their hearts.
One year later
Snow fell slowly outside the window. BaekHyun watched it with a smile, curled up on the living room couch. His lap was occupied by Kira, who minutes earlier had hissed at Vivi, who was running back and forth trying to climb up too.
He gently stroked the kitten’s back while watching the pets’ antics. Since BaekHyun had moved in with SeHun, it wasn’t that their pets got along particularly well. Sometimes they played or slept together, but most of the time they ignored each other—except when it was time to cuddle with BaekHyun. That was when the fighting began. SeHun hadn’t lied when he said Vivi was possessive. Nor when he said that he was too.
For example, that year SeHun had begged him on his knees not to go to the work party. He said it was the only day of the year when he didn’t have to share him with his coworkers, and that he wanted him all to himself. BaekHyun had no way of saying no to that puppy-dog face his boyfriend made when he wanted something. And after all, spending the day in bed with SeHun was a privilege. As far as he was concerned, the party could be canceled; he couldn’t care less about what happened beyond those doors.
“I see you’re already comfortable,” SeHun said, entering the living room with two cups of coffee, made exactly the way BaekHyun liked them. Over time, BaekHyun had learned to drink coffee the way SeHun did, and he loved those small moments when they could share that flavor together.
He handed one to BaekHyun before sitting down beside him on the couch. He immediately received a furious glare from Kira.
“I’m sorry, my queen, I didn’t mean to bother you.” He kissed the kitten on the head. Vivi barked, clearly jealous. “And to you, my king, I’m very sorry too. Come here.”
Vivi immediately climbed into SeHun’s lap, and the world seemed to fall into a state of absolute calm. There they were: on the couch, watching a movie while drinking coffee, cuddled up with their pets. Was there any greater pleasure in the world? Probably not.
BaekHyun took a breath before saying the words he had felt deep in his heart for the first time in a year of dating.
“I love you so much. You know that, right?”
SeHun looked at him with a smile that made his eyes disappear into crescents as the movie continued in the background. Neither of them was really paying attention, as their bodies sought each other beneath the warm blankets, trying to be as close as possible.
“I love you too,” he replied. He leaned in to kiss him on the cheek, the nose, and then the lips. “I hope I get to hear it many more times from now on.”
BaekHyun rolled his eyes, amused. God, he really loved him.
“Don’t tempt fate.”
“I won’t,” SeHun said with a laugh. “Merry Christmas, darling.”
At that moment, BaekHyun had no doubt that he would look forward to every Christmas that followed, just so he could spend them together.
“Merry Christmas, my love.”