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They did it. They killed the fucking clown.
Eddie beams at the thought, looking up at the sky and reveling in the victory itself, and the beautiful September morning he’s stepped into.
As all seven losers walk to the quarry Eddie takes a moment to pat himself on the back. During the final battle Eddie finally realized something. He is not weak, he is not fragile, he is a grown ass man that won't collapse into a wheezing fit from a little bit of running. Even though he's always been told different.
“ I would've expected some bitching from you by now” Eddie jumps as Richie murmurs close to his ear, walking beside him towards the back of the group.
Instead of sighing and chopping the air with his hand, Eddie smiles and laughs.
Richie's face flushes “ Ed’s you're kinda scaring me here. Come on at least F bomb or something”
Eddie fucking giggles and doesnt even correct Richie. “ I’m… fucking happy” he looks up at Richie and smiles.
The taller man blushes and opens his mouth to speak before Ben cuts him off. “ Here we are! Who's jumping first?” he turns around with a smirk “ I know Eddie doesn't -” Before he can even finish Eddie is jumping off the edge of the cliff whooping and cheering before he hits the water.
When he resurfaces from the refreshing cold, he looks up to see his six best friends gaping down at him in shock. “ Come on! Don't leave me hanging!” he shouts.
Stan is the first to end the shocked silence with a guttural laugh “ you heard him!”
And soon all of the losers are jumping into the quarry, all with their own cheers and shouts before disappearing under the water.
Everyone seemed to pair off after that. Mike and Bill huddled close together, Ben and Beverly fully making out, Stanley trying to revive his phone to call Patty, and Richie swimming circles around Eddie, looking deep in thought.
Eddie watches him move with a soft smile on his face until the taller man eventually pops out of the water right in front of him.
“ C-can we t-talk Eddie?” And usually Eddie would have said something like “ about what dickwad?” or “ drop the stutter, you're not Bill, spit it out” but in this tranquil state he just nods.
Richie gently grabs his wrist and pulls him further away from the rest of the losers.
“ What's up Rich?” Eddie asks softly.
A million different expressions seem to cross the sharp planes of Richie's face until it finally lands on something akin to courageous.
Suddenly his big hands are on Eddie’s cheeks ( his right hand featherlight to not hurt his stab wound) and Richie's lips are on his. The kiss is chaste but somehow passionate. Like he's pouring all of his feelings into this one touch.
The kiss is over almost immediately after it begins and Richie is staring down at Eddie with hearts in his eyes. “ I love you” he blurts.
There's a silent moment before Richie begins to laugh, he could never be quiet for long, Eddie still knows that well enough despite how frazzled his brain currently is.
“ I guess… almost dying in the sewer made me realize that life is way too fucking short to not tell you how I feel and i know thats so cliche but it's the truth. I don't know what I would've done if you died in there and I never got to tell you. So yeah.. I love you” he starts doing fucking jazz hands.
Eddie's good mood evaporates. He loves Richie but he doesn't love Richie. They’re best friends and for god sakes he didn't even know Richie existed again till last night.
Eddie takes a step back and tries to mask the sadness in his expression. “ Rich.. I don't-”
Richie doesn't need to hear the rest. His entire face crumples, along with Eddie's heart, seeing his friend hurt so deeply and knowing it's all his fault.
“ your my best friend” Eddie states like that will make it better.
Richie plasters on a very obvious fake smile “ it's okay Eddie Spaghetti no hard feelings here” his eyes are glistening.
“ I’m sorry Richie I'm not gay I have-” It's at that moment he remembers his wife Myra. How he left her in New York with little to no explanation and hasn't been in any contact with her since he walked out.
“ Oh my shit i have to go- Myra- fuck” Eddie starts fishing for his own phone and pulls it out of his soggy pocket, recreating what he saw Stanley do to his own cell.
He turns around and starts walking towards land, looking for a connection to call his wife.
As he's stepping away from Richie he hears his best friend call out for him. “ Eddie, wait! Eddie please no… I was just joking! Eddie please” but they both know he's lying. They both hear the crack and wobble in his voice, the sob following his words.
Eddie can't turn around. He knows he’ll see a heartbroken Richie Tozier standing in front of him if he does and he’ll know he's the reason for it.
So instead of turning around he keeps walking. Despite Richie's choked shouts and the other loser’s questioning calls of his name. Eddie goes straight back to Neibolt, climbs on his bike, rides to the inn, and packs his bags to leave Derry forever. It's time to get back to his old life, his old job, his wife. Playtime with his friends is over.
Though the flight wasn't very long, Eddie still feels extremely jet lagged.
It could be chalked up to all the stress that he had felt the last few days, with the loser’s reunion, killing the fucking clown, Richies confession and the subsequent thoughts that came with that confession, or maybe it was the fact that Eddie hadn't slept in a good 40 hours.
Eddie decided it was because of the confession. It's what plagued his mind the entire plane ride. He thought about the look of pure adoration in Richie's eyes, the things he said, and the way Eddie had always felt when he was around his best friend.
Sure Eddie had always admired Richie. Yeah he believed Richie was the funniest person he’s ever known, of course his pulse has always rushed around him, obviously he felt something within him clicked into place when he saw his best friend at the jade of the orient again.
But those were normal things a man felt around his best friend. Eddie has not had many friends in his life but he still feels like this is how it's supposed to be... Right?
Eddies thoughts continue to spiral.
But nevermind any of that. He's on his way back to his wife. His wife of 7 years to whom he loves very deeply. Did they sleep in separate beds? Yes. Did the thought of making love to her disgust Eddie to his very core? Yes. Did she sometimes lose her temper and take it out on him-
“ Eddie!” he hears the shrill voice through the door before he even opens it, completely throwing his train of thought off the tracks.
Eddie steps into his and Myra’s apartment with a loving grin on his face, one he expects Myra to be wearing as well. But no. Eddie is met with possibly the angriest look his wife has ever given him.
“ Marty… hey” he tries to lighten the mood with the nickname that always makes her laugh.
Myra is not amused. “ Look who decided to come back!! Gone for days without a word and you just expect me to-” she's cut off when Eddie pulls her into a tight hug.
You would think that at this point Myra would change her tune and start feeling concern for her husband. For the bags around his eyes, the deep scar on his cheek, and blood stains on his clothing, but no again. She doubles down.
“ are you fucking kidding me Eddie?” she squawks and roughly pushes him away, so roughly he wheezes.
While she starts to scream, Eddie's mind wanders back to Richie of all people. Richie would never yell at him like this. He knows that Richie would see something was wrong and take him in his arms , not roughly, just consoling him with sweet words and stupid jokes that would make him snort. Richie would politely ask him what happened and kiss him sweetly until he felt better.
Hold on. Hold the fucking phone, what was that last thought? Eddie goes cold, his entire body tensing as Myra rips him a new one and he tries to block that thought from his mind.
“ MARTY” he cuts off whatever she’s onto next. “ I’m sorry. I'm back now for good, okay?” He puts his arms out.
Myra pauses for a beat then sighs, her fight over. “ Never do that to me again Eddie bear”
Eddie is already nodding, he knows what happens when he disagrees with her.
Myra slowly closes the distance between them, finally giving her husband a real hug and Eddie expects to feel relieved but… it still doesn’t come.
He shakes it off and lifts his head from her shoulder for a kiss. This’ll make him feel better, this will bring him comfort.
When Myra’s lips touch his… Eddie almost recoils.
He forgot about the lip gloss she’s always wearing that makes it feel like Eddie is kissing slime, he forgot about the perfume she wears way too much of that smells absolutely rancid, and he forgot how she puts no emotion, no love, into her kisses. It's nothing like kissing Richie at the Quarry. With Richie he felt loved, more loved than he had ever felt in his entire life. He almost wishes the taller man was there with him right now, in this current moment.
That thought makes him take a step back, well it's not so much as a step as it is a stumble. His head hits the door he left open and he groans.
“ Eddie… what am i going to do with you” Myra sighs, crossing her arms. A pang of fear threatens to topple Eddie over, fear he should not feel towards the woman he married.
When he looks up from the floor and meets Myra’s eyes something inside him clicks. I don't love her. He never had.
He had married the carbon copy of his mother because he was afraid of the insurmountable amount of relief he felt when she died.
How did he just come to this conclusion? The things he knows he's supposed to feel for Myra, he feels for Richie right now. He would never leave him behind to go to fuck ass Derry Maine. He would never push him away, deny his kiss, or be afraid of Richie hitting him like he is with Myra.
Fucking hell. Eddie is in love with Richie fucking Tozier. And as much as it terrifies him, it liberates him even more.
“ I have to go,” he shouts suddenly.
“ Eddie?! This is fucking ridiculous you just walked in and promised you weren't leaving- this is a joke” She turns pale.
Eddie laughs “ I-I just realized i need to leave. Sorry” he grins at all of it.
Myra is fuming. “ Eddie if you leave right now… im not going to be so forgiving when you come back”
Eddie only cackles. “ good fucking riddance”
And with that he turns around and leaves. For good.
Eddie is regretting a lot of things on his flight to California.
Maybe he should have waited a day or two before hopping on a 6 hour flight. At least take a nap or something. Now he's running on 46 hours of no sleep and still hasn't gone to the ER for his clown injuries like the hole in his cheek.
Oh well! Eddies on his way to confess his love so that makes everything okay. If everything goes his way, he’ll sleep on Richie's couch.
He checks his phone ( it survived the quarry but it barely functions) and sees that Richie already put his home address in the losers group chat that Mike hastily made. Lucky him.
He gets off the plane with the same luggage he brought to Derry, then brought home, then brought to California. God he's so underprepared for this.
He knows he looks absolutely disgusting as he walks through the airport and hails a cab. Is it the cheek wound, the dark purple eyebags or the blood stained clothes though? That's the question.
Maybe it's a combination of all three he thinks while the taxi driver leers at him through the rearview window. He's sure the driver wouldn't care if he knew Eddie was going to confess his love to his long lost crush.That makes it all better!
God he needs sleep. His thoughts are barely coherent.
On the walk up Richie's driveway (yeah he has a whole fucking house with a fucking driveway) the doubts set in. What if he hates me? What if he already moved on? And now he's angry at nothing. great.
And that's why Eddie is already worked up when Richie opens the door to his house, fully in sweats, looking like a wreck. “Eddie?!” his eyes widen “ holy shit what are you doing here?” he breathes.
He looks like he’s going to grab Eddie's shoulders but his hands stop midair, as if he's remembering their exchange by the quarry. It makes Eddie feel so guilty for what he did 24 hours earlier he completely forgets about what he just made himself angry at.
" I lied to you Richie. At the quarry yesterday... or the day before I don't fucking know." he chops the air in front of him to really show how serious he is.
A small smile appears on Richies face at the gesture, probably reminding him of 13 year old Eddie.
" Lied about what Eds?" he asks tentatively.
" Do not fucking call me tha-" he stops himself and takes a deep breath.
" when I said I wasn't gay... I was lying. Holy shit I was totally lying im so gay Richie like so gay" Eddie finally smiles up at his best friend after lifting that weight off of his shoulders.
Richie barks out a loud laugh ( like he's ever laughed quietly before). " Really?" he asks teasingly.
"yeah" Eddie breathes. " I've been thinking about kissing men the entire day" he laughs.
Richie grins and leans his full body weight on his doorway. " Well Eds I don't know what you want me to do about that. Set up your account on Grindr?"
Eddie can't tell if he's joking or not. He still decides to yell at Richie anyway, ever the extremist.
" What? No you fucking dickwad I'm gay for you. Just you Richie." He smacks Riches broad chest for emphasis.
Richie, sadly, looks shocked. " Me?" he whispers.
" oh my god yes you idiot. I'm fucking in love with you" he yells it for some reason. " and I'm sorry this took me so long" that comes out much gentler.
Richie grins so widely his eyes are almost closed. " You love me" he whispers, not a question, a statement.
Eddie giggles " yeah I totally do"
They both stand and stare at each other laughing softly for a moment. This shared moment between them. This beginning of something new.
" Kiss me" Eddie suddenly demands.
Richie flushes before saluting and exclaiming, " yes sir!"
Eddies laugh gets cut off by Richies lips on his. Eddie wraps his arms around the taller mans neck and hums into the kiss that's mostly just two grins pushed together.
He feels that he'll remember this for the rest of his life. The day he completely changed for the better, the kiss that started the greatest, and hopefully last, relationship he'll ever have.
When Richie pulls away he immediately puts his forehead to Eddies as they continue to smile at each other.
It holds for a beat before Richie just needs to fill the silence.
" I would take you to my bedroom but its currently covered in ice cream cartons and dirty tissues"
" shut the fuck up Richie" Eddie says with a disgusting amount of love in his voice.
" I'll help you clean it" he whispers before he pulls his boyfriend in for another kiss.