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Charles Augustus Milverton kept watching his secretary from the corner of his eyes. Ruskin was sitting next to him on the seat of the carriage and looked out of the window. He seemed to be lost in his thoughts, because he didn't notice that Milverton was fixating on him in the last ten minutes. There was a wish inside his heart while he watched his secretary, an urge he wanted to obey, but he kept himself back from it. He wanted to hold Ruskin's hand and warm himself up. It was really cold even inside and Milverton craved some warmth.
He was sure that no matter the weather, Ruskin's hand must be warm all the time. Ruskin, with his warm brown tones, chocolate hair and almond skin, reminded him of autumn, while he was more like winter with his own cold paleness. He didn't doubt that Ruskin didn't feel the cold, not even now. He seemed so leisurely and dreamy. Milverton sometimes found himself envious of him and yearned for his warmth.
Was this really all about Ruskin's supposed warmth? He didn't know and he didn't want to find the answer to this question. As the King of Blackmail, he was not allowed to form bonds like this. Ruskin was his secretary and right-hand man and he wished him to be his warmth-provider and nothing more.
Milverton let out a sigh. He should just ask Ruskin to put another blanket in the carriage next time and he will not feel what he feels now. But somehow, he doubted that it would fully chase the cold away from him. Probably only Ruskin could do that.
But it would be embarrassing to grab his hand, wouldn't it?
*****
Ruskin could feel his employer's gaze on his skin and it burned a mark in his soul even if he purposefully didn't look in that direction. He knew that if he would, he would immediately turn red as his eyes met the beautiful golden gaze. And in that moment, he didn't doubt that Mr. Milverton would know what was inside his heart.
That how much he loved him, desperately yearning for some intimacy.
Ruskin was in love with his employer for long, long years and as his feelings grew stronger, it became harder and harder for him to hide it. Mr. Milverton was his life and making him happy was what Ruskin lived for. He didn't wait for his feelings to get returned - yet, it was breaking his heart that there was not even a chance for it. After all, Mr. Milverton was his higher-up and Ruskin was his subordinate. He was aware that even if Mr. Milverton valued him, he would never initiate anything with Ruskin. The King of Blackmail made fun of other people's love and never fell in love himself. It was fate's cruel joke that Ruskin's heart was beating for Mr. Milverton, but he knew that he would rather stop it than let it beat for anyone else.
Mr. Milverton was his everything - and it was as it was meant to be.
Ruskin let out a sigh. He was happy when he could bring joy to Mr. Milverton, but he secretly wished for something more. A little touch, holding his hand in his own on a cold day like this. It would have been enough to make Ruskin feel content, but there was no possibility of this ever coming true.
Not at all... right?
Ruskin suddenly felt something cold at his hand - then it clasped around his fingers like a snake around its prey's body. But this touch now didn't come from a predator, it was cold, but gentle - and Ruskin felt that the warmth spread in his body for it. He blushed and shyly turned his head over. It was Mr. Milverton who took his hand unexpectedly. He didn't look at Ruskin, he didn't say anything - but he didn't let him go.
Ruskin didn't know the reason behind the touch, but it didn't even matter. His fingers embraced Mr. Milverton's hand and he didn't let go of him either while the joy was bursting in his heart.
Who knew that it is so quick for a dream to come true?