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“Your boyfriend seems mad,” Johnny oohs with all the intrigue of a second grader watching their classmate be called to the front of the class.
Mark hums, noting from across the bustling Waffle House the taut purse of doll-like lips and a murderous glint in his round brown eyes – all the marks of a very angry Lee Donghyuck. “Mm, yeah. He’s probably mad that he didn’t get to go to the concert with us, since he had to work.”
As Ten sheds his coat, warmed by the stove and griddle heated air, he awes sympathetically. “Should we have come to this particular Waffle House then?” He chuckles, “If he poisons or spits in our food, I wouldn’t be shocked.”
“Don’t worry baby,” Johnny takes Ten’s winter frosted knuckles and kisses them gently. “He’ll only poison Mark. He’ll probably just spit in ours.”
Ten snorts, “Well, it’s not like I hadn’t eaten worse before.” And then he shares a secret sort of laugh with Johnny that, okay, Mark really doesn’t want to know why that’s so funny.
“Anyway,” Mark notes Donghyuck making his way with a pen and order pad in hand, “look just play it chill, like the concert sucked or something and maybe he won’t feel like he missed something cool.”
“It was Taylor Swift though-“
“Hello.” Donghyuck stops at their booth with a tight smile and saccharine voice. “How are we this morning?” It’s really just shy of midnight, but like Mark is going to bother correcting him when he looks like he might stab the next person with a waffle spatula.
The table gives a very cautious, “Good….”
Donghyuck chuckles, “You guys can relax,” he assures, dropping the cold act. “I’m not mad at any of you.”
“You do look mad, though,” Mark says, nervously.
“Oh, I’m mad,” he agrees. “Just not at you guys.”
“Ooh, spill,” Ten says, leaning forward. “Work drama?”
“As a matter of fact, yes. Mark’s little boyfriend decided to get cute with me today, you know, after I had to miss an awesome concert to be yelled at by boomers and truck drivers all fucking night.”
Johnny and Ten give Mark twin looks of confusion. Mark doesn’t have to ask why. “He’s talking about Jaemin who was never my boyfriend,” he says pointedly to Donghyuck like they’ve had this conversation a million times- and nearly have. “We, like, met once at this stupid party-“
“And he sucked your dick-” Donghyuck added cheerily while a vein in his hand nearly popped from gripping his pen so hard.
“Baby,” Mark sighs, and really has nothing else to say because. Okay, yeah, Jaemin definitely did do that; he can’t fix that stupid very drunk mistake now though. “Can I just get a coke and a coffee, please?”
“Of course, baby,” he says the endearment with all the sweetness of an artichoke, “it’s my pleasure to serve you. You must be so dehydrated from dancing and jumping and screaming your heart out singing along with Taylor at one of the biggest events of a life-”
“Hey!” A voice accompanied by the snap of fingers intending to get the attention of Donghyuck grouses, “Can I get another refill of coffee? I’ve been waiting for thirty minutes!”
Mark can hear the plastic of Donghyuck’s pen crack under the pressure of his grip as he smiles all prettily and says, “Of course! Just a second~” He turns back to his table of friends and says with a pearly smile, “I’m going to add fiber glass to his sugar container,” before he prances off to fulfil the order.
“Maybe we should have gone to a different Waffle House…” Mark sighs.
“Are you kidding,” Ten is practically beaming with glee. “This is so entertaining. God, I love Donghyuck. I hope he throws coffee at somebody.”
Johnny laughs, “I guess you guys have some issues about Jaemin?”
“I mean, no? Sometimes, I guess. At first Donghyuck was pretty jealous about it, because he’s always like that- I mean, he likes to play it up sort of thing, but he’s not usually like this, you know?” Mark wipes his palms on his jeans. “I feel bad because I think he’s just having a rough night. I should have gotten him some merch or something.”
Before more can be said, the devil himself shows up. “Hi guys!” Na Jaemin grins a perfect set of white teeth at them, his Waffle House nameplate gleaming under the florescent lights. “Has anyone taken your order tonight? Some of our staff are running a little slow this evening…” He pointedly glances at Donghyuck who is smiling and nodding at an old man berating him about tipping culture.
“Um, listen, Jaemin – well, first off yeah, can I get my coffee and coke? But also, like, I don’t know what you and Donghyuck talk about but, um, he’s just having a rough time so if you could…” Mark doesn’t know how to finish his sentence. On the one hand, he wants to be supportive of his boyfriend, he loves him after all but also Donghyuck kind of has a habit of hating on someone one week and loving them the next, so. He’s also not sure what spurred Donghyuck’s bad mood in the first place, if Jaemin had even been intentionally trying to make him mad. So, he’d hate to accuse Jaemin of something he didn’t do, but as a boyfriend, he should say something…right?
“Oh, don’t worry Markie,” Jaemin says, sickly sweet – and despite the ruckus of the restaurant, Mark can see Donghyuck’s head snap over in their direction, his sharp hearing no doubt picking up on that nickname, “I know how uptight your boyfriend is, I’m treating him with velvet gloves tonight.”
Mark could practically hear venom dripping off every word, slipping right through his teeth. It’s a little uncanny how much it reminds him of Donghyuck—it’s a wonder they’re not best of friends, they’d probably be quite the dynamic duo. Well, Mark shudders at the thought of the terror those two could wreak, so maybe for the mental safety of everybody, it’s probably better they stay enemies. “Um. Oh, okay-“
“Baby~” Donghyuck practically shoves Jaemin aside and gives Mark what can only be described as a sweet and sultry smile. It’s at once lovely and incredibly off putting in this black and yellow public setting of the Waffle House at midnight. “Can I get you anything? A chocolate chip waffle maybe?”
Mark blinks some of the charm out of his eyes, “Just the coke and coffee-“
“Donghyuck,” Jaemin says, rather tersely, “This is technically my area.”
“I thought you were on break?” Donghyuck says, writing what Mark hopes is his order. He looks over to Johnny and Ten, sure they’re getting tired of not being able to even voice their drink order, but their eyes are glued to the daggers being shot from the two servers’ gazes.
“I’m back.” Jaemin snips primly. “So maybe you should take care of those truckers you’re shaking your ass for tips for.”
Donghyuck’s sticky sweet smile evaporates completely. “Don’t act like you don’t do the same.”
“I don’t, actually, because I love my boyfriend too much to whore myself out for two bucks a table.”
Donghyuck scoffs, “I make two hundred on slow nights, actually, but I wouldn’t expect you to be able to dream up that number considering your customer service is ass. Just because you have a pretty face doesn’t mean that amounts to natural charm and charisma.”
From presumably out of thin air, a tall, nervous looking ‘chef’ approaches, looking like he’s about to shake right out of his uniform, the name tag Jisung dangling off his apron. “Um. Sorry, um, I just.. I thought it was weird that I haven’t been making waffles for a minute and um, just thought-“
“Donghyuck, if you took your head out of your own ass long enough to really take a look at yourself, you’d realize you don’t have any of those things, you’re just so goddamn annoying and desperate for attention that people pity you.”
Ten’s mouth drops open while Johnny covers his own with his hand. Mark is pretty sure ten seconds ago, this eatery was filled with noise- now it’s a little disturbingly quiet as Donghyuck doesn’t react immediately. Instead, he hums contemplatively, tapping his pen on the pucker of his lips.
“I’m confused,” he says with an exaggerated pout, “is pity something that you give someone whose boyfriend cheated on them? Because I was doing some math the other day, when you reminded me about how you sucked Mark’s dick at that party, and that was a month before he and I started dating, but only a week after yours and Jeno’s second anniversary?” At Jaemin’s murderous glare, Donghyuck asks, “So would we pity Jeno? Or pity you that you’re so cock hungry you’d toss your loyalty out to wet the first dick that comes along? Maybe we should ask him?”
Mark isn’t entirely sure how it started, he thinks he might have blacked out a little from the stress honestly, but the next thing he knows, he’s watching his boyfriend grip the dyed blonde of Jaemin’s hair while the other server slaps and gnashes his teeth intending to bite wildly.
“Holy shit,” Johnny gasps, phone already in hand and recording. Ten is standing in his seat, coaching his friend, “Donghyuck, don’t leave yourself open! Watch his hands!”
The nervous chef from earlier passed out at some point – or at least Mark hopes for that as opposed to getting smacked out of consciousness from a stray hit, while another server hesitantly (and weakly) tries to diffuse the fight, but Mark already knows there’s little point. Donghyuck not only starts fights, but he tends to finish them, one way or another.
As the boyfriend, he knows he should probably do something…as it were, though, Donghyuck seems to be winning, Jaemin tearing at his apron while he tries to land punches anywhere he can and Donghyuck yanking him around and smacking his face when he maneuvers it right.
“You gotta put him in a headlock, Donghyuck!” Ten yells.
“Guys, c’mon, help me get them to stop-” Mark says.
“Dude, Donghyuck is fucking crazy right now,” Johnny scoffs, still recorded. Mark actually thinks he’s livestreaming this, “I’m not getting in the middle of that.”
Mark is completely at a loss until Donghyuck gets a good enough grip to slam Jaemin into the nearest booth- which happens to be theirs. Screams from other tables erupt and Mark sees more filming than calling going on but he’s pretty sure at this point police could be called.
“Donghyuck, baby, you got to stop now!” Mark tries his best, but now as Jaemin lies on the table, his legs kick out and try to knee Donghyuck, but instead Donghyuck grips his ankle hard enough to stall him and then literally shoves him off the table, landing headfirst onto the sticky, tile floor of the Waffle House. An array of noises sound around them, some cheering, some worried, someone still asking for their order, but Mark has to focus on the fact that Donghyuck is now clearing the table, fully intending to jump and elbow drop onto him like some fucking pro wrestler.
Mark catches him just in time though, wrapping his arms around Donghyuck while some other servers rush to Jaemin’s aid. Donghyuck wiggles in his hold, his body warm and his face red from anger. “Donghyuck, calm down, it’s okay,” Mark assures him, now able to talk more calmly since he’s so close to Donghyuck’s ears. “You won, you’re good, it’s okay.”
“You’re a fucking psycho!” Jaemin spits, his hand on his head – but thankfully not seeming to be too hurt.
“God, shut the fuck up!” Donghyuck practically screams, probably not disproving Jaemin’s point.
“Guys, we should get out of here before like police come or something.” Johnny says, still filming.
Donghyuck wriggles out of Mark’s hold, and for a second Mark is worried he’s going to keep fighting, but instead he rips off his apron, throwing it at Jaemin’s face and stomps towards the exit. “And by the way!” Donghyuck stops midway in the open door, “The guy that washes dishes here doesn’t even bother using soap! Enjoy your meal, darlings!”
Mark, Johnny, and Ten don’t bother to stick around for the reaction to that. They hurry after Donghyuck who is already waiting by Johnny’s car, and shuffles in along with them as they make their getaway.
“Donghyuck!” Ten screams – but in glee. “You made my whole night even better, thank you so much!”
“Are you hurt?” Johnny asks.
“Nah,” Donghyuck says, the adrenaline seeping out of him now and making him look sleepy. “He just scratched me some.”
“Where?” Mark asks, reaching over to gently brush over his arms. “Do you need some peroxide or-“
His words are stopped with a kiss. When he blinks his eyes back open, hearts and sparkles falling away, Donghyuck smiles, “Did I do good?”
Mark snorts incredulously. “Dude, you just got into probably the gayest Waffle House fight I ever saw,” he says, “and won. Of course you did good! That was crazy, forreal – I mean, you definitely shouldn’t have done that because, like, I don’t know if that was morally right, but you looked really cool, so, it’s okay.”
Donghyuck giggles, folding his legs up and sighing happily while he leans into Mark’s side. “So, boys,” he says, “Where should we go?”
“Well,” Mark says, “I never got my coffee and coke…”
The car is quiet for a second until Johnny says, “Should we go to the Waffle house two blocks over?”
“…”
“Okay.”