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Sam was ready to pull his hair out. Him and Dean had taken a case in the middle of Bumfuck, Montana and everything went smoothly, they killed monster, saved people and that was that. Since they finished earlier than expected, they decided to take a few days off, which turned out to be a bad idea because Gabriel decided to let them know he was alive by using his trickster power to screw with them.
And now here Sam sat, wondering if he could somehow steal Gabriel angel blade and kill him with it. The archangel arrived three days ago and started playing tricks on the brothers. His most recent one had sent Dean to god knows where. One minute him and Sam had been trying to think up a way to get rid of Gabriel and the next, Dena had disappeared. Sam was ready to lose his shit.
"Where did you send him this time Gabriel?" Sam asked as he glared as the grinning archangel. "Don't worry Sammy, Dean-o is fine" Dragging out the fine, Gabriel sauntered over to the large hunter and pointed the lollipop in his hand at the man's face. "You should worry about what I have planned for you" Sam continued to glare as he knocked the angel's hand away from his face. "You're not going to turn me into a girl again are you?"
Gabriel snicked at the memory. "It's not funny Gabriel! I went to sleep with a dick and woke up with boobs! That's not how I wanted to spend my morning" It was made even more awkward when Dean couldn't stop staring at his chest.
"Stop staring at my boobs Dean!"
"I'm sorry, I can't help it! They're just...right.. frickin there!"
Sam cringed slightly at the memory while Gabriel laughed. "That was great to watch, next time I'll turn Dean into a girl instead, that would be even funnier" As if it was already happening, Gabriel laughed even harder for a few moment before looking back at Sam with smirk.
"You'll stay a man today Sammy, can't make any promises about the near future though" Sam groaned and rubbed a hand over his face. "No what I have planned is much more fun, which is why I needed to get rid of Dean since he'd probably kill me"
"He already wants to kill so at this point, you're only making the want to kill stronger" Though if Lucifer couldn't even properly kill the archangel, he doubted him or Dean could either.
Gabriel merely shrugged and grinned up at the hunter. "I'll worry about him later, right now, I have plans for you" When Sam asked what those plans were the grin on the angel's face turned into a smirk. "I'm going to seduce you"
It was silent for a full minute. Neither of them said a word, just stared at each other. Then, Sam lost it. He started laughing so hard he had to put a hand on the nearby wall to keep him balanced. He heard Gabriel huff in annoyance which only made him laugh more. "Most people get all hot and horny when I say that to them, they don't laugh" Sam snorted and stood up straight as he tried catching his breath. "You've gotta be joking, I thought you liked Dean?" He wasn't blind, he saw the way the two stared at each other when the other wasn't looking.
"I do but, I wanna try out both Winchesters and figured I'd start with the younger one and worry about Dean later" Sam chuckled and shook his head. "Hate to break it to you but I already kinda have something going with someone else" His thoughts flickered to Kevin, who was currently back at the batcave trying to decipher the tablet.
"Who? Cas?" Sam raised an eyebrow and shook his head. "Who do you even know that's still alive besides Dean and Cas?" Sam frowned slightly at the reminder of just how many people he's lost over the years. "Kevin, the prophet" Came Sam answer to which Gabriel responded by laughing. "Didn't know you were a pedophile Winchester" Sam responded with bitchface number twenty-five. "He's nearly twenty, so I'm not a pedophile" Yes Kevin was still pretty young be he was still a contesting adult. Though, the two of them hadn't even kissed yet or even established what their relationship was.
"You said kinda though" The angel pointed his lollipop back at Sam. "Is there even anything happening between you two?" The pause and look on sam's face was all the answer he needed. "If you two aren't even dating then there's nothing to worry about, now get on the bed so I can rock your world" He plastered perverted looking grin on his face and sam rolled his eyes. "No, bring Dean back and go at with him" Even if him and Kevin currently weren't dating, Sam wasn't going to do anything that could ruin his chances. Plus, he didn't even have any kind of feelings for the archangel beyond annoyment.
"Fine" Gabriel pouted. "How about just a kiss then? After word I'll turn my attentions to your brother"
"The answer's still no Gabriel"
"I won't turn you into a girl if you kiss me"
"You'll turn me into a girl again even if I do kiss you" Gabriel crossed his arms over his chest and pouted again. "How about, you kiss me and I'll leave you alone for the next two weeks" Sam sighed, he had a feeling Gabriel wouldn't give up until he got what he wanted, the archangel was stubborn like himself and Dean. "Fine, but this doesn't get mentioned to anyone" Gabriel grinned before grabbing Sam by the back of the neck and yanking him down so he was eye level with Gabriel. "Pucker up big boy" He purred before bringing their lips together.
It wasn't an unpleasant kiss but it was definitely something Sam would rather be doing with Kevin. Still, he kissed back to please the archangel. Just when he was about to pull away though, Gabriel bit his lip, making him gasp, which the angel took advantage of and stuck his tongue down the hunter's throat. Sam let out an annoyed sigh through his nose but rubbed his tongue along the angel's.
They kissed for a few more moments before Gabriel finally pulled away from a flushed Sam with a smirk. "Have I changed your mind about letting me rock your world?" The hunter rolled his eyes. "The answers still no Gabriel and it's always gonna be no" Gabriel let go of Sam and shrugged. "Your loss, I'll go play with your brother now" With that, the sound of fluttering wings filled the room as Gabriel disappeared.
"I'm going to have nightmares about those two, I just know it" Sam grumbled running a hand through his and could've swore he heard laughter following his words.