Chapter Text
Look, Billy could tell them the truth, but well-
“My Technically-husband’s clone/cousin/daughter from another earth (Universe? Reality?) destabilised. She’s a ghost by the way. So I am pregnant with her, and therefore would like paternity or maternity leave- since I’m pregnant for 5-6 more months, and will need leave for 2-4 months after having the baby. Oh and I don’t really need to be benched, but I think he would be more comfortable if I wasn’t working too hard while pregnant.”
Just seems like a mouthful. And even though he would rather not lie when it wasn’t needed, a lie of omission wasn’t really a lie.
It was just leaving out details and keeping the sentence short!
”Oh I’m going to need paternity leave in five- to six months”
In hindsight he probably should have expected the shock and confusion, maybe even chosen to pull one of them aside or just told them when he had more time.
Oh well.
***
Batman was the first to get himself together. “Could you elaborate”
“Yeah, of course, about what part, mister Batman sir?”
“You’ve had se-“ Flash said, his mouth open in shock, spluttering stopped, Marvel hadn’t even noticed it until he stopped.
‘Yuck’
“What?” Marvel said, tilting his head at Flash, confusion marring his features “No, why would you think that?”
“You reproduce asexually?” Batman questioned, not relenting to the diversion.
Marvel’s face only looked more confused. “Of course.” How else would he even do it.
“What gender will the child have? If it is of your choosing. I propose female. I would be honoured to show her Themyscira”
“Oh I don’t choose, but she is a girl, I would love for her to see the island with you!” He said, sounding giddy, confusion gone, replaced by a blooming smile.
“You’ll have to wait a bit though, she’s still being made… Should only be five to six months though!”
“Wait, wait, wait… so you’re pregnant” Flash finally broke out.
“Well yeah, but it’s not the same process”
Flash only seemed more confused. “Wha-“
“How does your… pregnancy differ” Batman obviously trying his darnest not to be too invasive, though failing horrifically in his pursuit for knowledge.
“Well you can’t see a difference, unless you can see souls, then you can see I have two.” He replied, trying to find useful and truthful information, without giving enough away for him to have anything ‘on him’.
“Is there anything of your health we should know brother mine. Do not fret, if you grow weaker I shall stand tall beside you” she said, earnestly.
“Oh…”
Well he couldn’t lie to her, lies of omission, when needed but…
“Well I don’t get weaker until after I’ve had her, but I’ll be fine though, just won’t be able to work for 2-4 months, in 5-6 months ”
“How is the birth in question, when you’re in such a state after as to not fight for almost half a year?” She questioned.
“Oh…” How was birth? …It will be fine for you. Soloman answered. Well mom always used to call him a gift.
“It’s fine, i just need the leave, because when she’s physical she’ll need me for- Well like how a baby needs mik, but instead she gets the-” Nourishment, Solomon provides. “-nourishment from me. That will be a little painful, but fine.”
“What!” Flash screeches, his disbelief clear.
“Good, good” she comments, ignoring Flash’s outburst entirely.
“Well, I have to go back to Fawcett now!”