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Alice briskly ran down the path to the Mad Hatter and March Hare’s house. She was looking forward to having a nice afternoon cup of tea with the odd couple, or at least as nice as their wily antics would permit. Her spirits rose as she caught sight of the mad duo’s house in the distance, and she hastened her pace. Stepping through the gate to the house, she cheerfully announced her arrival.
“Good afternoon!” Alice said. “I hope I didn’t take too lo-“
Alice stopped in mid-sentence as her eyes locked with the last person she expected, or wanted for that matter, to meet: The Queen of Hearts. Her royal highness was seated at the large red chair at the far end of the table, and the King was seated in a smaller chair adjacent to her. The Queen’s steely gaze struck fear into Alice’s heart.
“Oh, dear,” said Alice.
“YOU!” boomed the Queen.
“W-W-Who?!” stammered Alice. “Me?”
“Who else?!” shouted the Queen. “How dare you show your face in my presence after all the trouble you’ve caused me!”
“Now now,” said Alice, waving her hands as if to defuse the situation. “Let’s not do anything hasty. I didn’t even expect to meet you here.”
“SILENCE!” shouted the Queen. “OFF WITH HER HE-“
“Dear!” said the King. “We can’t execute her here! You declared these premises to be neutral ground, remember?”
“Neutral ground?” inquired Alice. “When did this happen?”
“Just last Fluesday,” said the Hatter.
The Queen folded her arms grumpily and murmured a few unintelligble words under her breath.
“Well,” said the Queen, “there is one thing you could do to… temporarily get in my good graces.”
“What is it?” asked Alice.
“There is a conspicuous lack of butter at this table,” said the Queen. “You must bring me some buttercups!”
“Buttercups?” inquired Alice. “But that’s nonsense. Butter doesn’t come from a flower.”
“Of course it does!” shouted the Queen. “Just look for a flower garden and you’re sure to find some! Now go, and make it snappy!”
Alice didn’t dare to delay any further. She quickly rushed out the gate and made her way back to the path through the woods. As she walked along the path, the Queen’s words brought back a bitter memory of her first visit to Wonderland.
“A flower garden,” Alice said to herself. “Oh, I’d rather not! After all, those flowers were so beastly to me!”
Alice had revisited many of the Wonderland denizens on subsequent trips to the strange world, but one group of characters she absolutely went out of her way to avoid was the garden of live flowers. The flowers’ horrible treatment of her especially stung, what with their elitist personalities repelling her. The thought of having to meet them face to face even once more made her stomach turn.
“Perhaps I should just leave Wonderland for today,” said Alice. “After all, those flowers would surely bully me again. They might even try to do worse, unless I were my right si-“
Alice suddenly stopped before she could finish her sentence. Her demeanor shifted from irritated and reluctant to a more mischievous one upon coming to a realization.
“I am my right size!” she exclaimed. “Well, that changes everything! I won’t have to leave Wonderland early after all. I know just how to deal with those flowers.”
Alice retraced her steps to the White Rabbit’s house. Upon arriving at the house, she surveyed the area for a tall flower bed. Sure enough, there was the very same flower bed she had visited on her first trip to Wonderland. Alice slowly marched up to the flower bed and looked around until she saw the flowers who had given her so much grief. The snooty plants were in the middle of a conversation she could barely hear. As soon as Alice drew nearer to them, they stopped and took notice of her.
“Excuse me,” said Alice.
“Who is it?” said the Daisy.
“Someone you’ve met before,” Alice said smugly.
“Wait a minute,” said the Lily. “She looks awfully familiar.”
“It couldn’t be!” said the Iris. “It’s that yellow-topped weed!”
“She must be a mile high!” said the Daisy.
“I’m not a mile high!” boomed Alice. “And I’m not a weed either!”
“But how did she get so big?!” said the Lilac.
“May I remind you,” said Alice, her voice lowering to an almost sinister tone, “what I said would happen if I returned to my right size?”
“Y-You said you could pick every one of us?” the Tulip replied meekly.
“You have quite a keen memory,” said Alice. “Such an act is well within my power.”
“Oh, my goodness!” cried the Daisy.
“Please spare us!” shouted the Lilac.
The entire flowerbed was in an uproar. They were all jabbering in a panic, seeing as how they wished to be rid of Alice but had no means to run away from her. Alice saw reason to make good on her threat; for as much as she disliked the talking plants, she had no intention of harming any of them. Standing proud, she decided to cut straight to the point.
“If you wish to avoid a most horrible fate,” said Alice, “you could help me. I am looking for a buttercup.”
“Buttercup?!” the Iris shouted indignantly. “What could someone of your status possibly want with a buttercup?!”
"That's none of your business!" snapped Alice, furiously stamping her foot. "And you're in no position to ask anything of me!"
“Please, Iris!” cried the Daisy. “Don’t infuriate her!”
“Girls, please!” shouted the Rose. “All this commotion won’t get us anywhere! If I may be so kind, I can point you in the direction of the buttercups.”
The other flowers quickly quieted down. Alice leaned down closer to the Rose. For as bad an impression as the flowers had made on her during her first visit, she still remembered how moderate and understanding the Rose had been to her.
“I’m listening,” Alice said politely.
“You will find the buttercups over there to your left,” said the Rose, pointing Alice in the right direction.
Alice looked to her left, and, sure enough, there she saw a patch of buttercups. The odd plants more than lived up to their name, for their buds resembled cups of butter.
“This is just what I was looking for!” exclaimed Alice. “Thank you so very much! It’s nice to see there’s at least one flower among you with manners.”
Alice plucked two buds of buttercups. Having attained what she had been looking for, Alice turned and walked away. While most of the flowers were still cowering, the Iris scowled at the enormous girl.
“Hmph,” scoffed the Iris. “Even at her current size, her stems still look very scrawny.”
This remark did not evade Alice’s notice, and it brought back a particularly unpleasant memory that made her clench her fists. She remembered the embarrassment she felt when the Daisy pulled up her skirt and pointed at her legs. It wasn’t so much the comment about her legs as it was the lifting of her skirt in front of so many spectators that made her blood boil. The girl immediately rushed back to the flowers and stood over them, her face full of fury. All the flowers yelped in terror.
“What was that?!” snapped Alice, lifting her right leg as if to step on the Iris. “Perhaps you would like to become better acquainted with my scrawny stems?!”
“N-N-NOTHING!” cried the Iris. “NOTHING, I SWEAR!”
“I see,” said Alice, her furious face instantly morphing into a gleeful smile. “Very well. I will be off then. Fare you all well!”
The flowers didn’t dare say another word. They just sat silently and watched the blonde-haired girl walk off into the distance.
Meanwhile, Alice was feeling rather proud of herself. This moment had more than made up for her last encounter with the flowers. She giggled with glee as she pondered the willfulness she had displayed today.
“That went rather well,” said Alice. “For as much trouble as the people here give me, it feels great to stand up for myself. Still, I could go my whole life never having to see those awful flowers again!”
After about half an hour, Alice had finally made her way back to the March Hare and Mad Hatter’s house. As she walked through the front gate, she could see the Queen impatiently seated at the table.
“Took you long enough!” said the Queen. “I was beginning to think you had snuck off and left us waiting!”
“I would never!” Alice replied cheekily with a curtsy. “And here’s the butter, just like you requested!”
The Queen’s face quickly brightened into a gleeful grin at the sight of the buttercup buds.
“You’ve done well, child!” said the Queen. “I may yet commute your sentence!”
Alice breathed a sigh of relief. If she was able to get on the Queen’s good side this time, she very well wouldn’t have to worry about losing her head in future visits to Wonderland.