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It’s late on the bus, most players having slumped against their seat mate to get some sleep or are busying themselves with scrolling their phones in poor attempts at trying to lull themselves to sleep. Quinn is no different. This is the first road trip with the Wilds and while it’s normal for his nerves to keep him up at ungodly hours of the night, he doesn’t feel anxious right now. Just can’t sleep, or his body won’t let him sleep.
Kirill is sat beside him also not sleeping but at least he’s doing something considered productive, reading. It’s a book in Russian so Quinn has zero idea what the title even is but he finds his eyes stuck on the books edge, right where Kirll’s finger sits in waiting to flip to the next page, which he doesn’t take long to do. He reads faster than Quinn does. Maybe he should pick up a book at their next stop? People say it’s good for sleep, calms the nervous system or something.
Quinn shifts a little at the thought. While he isn’t feeling particularly worked up and anxious, he definitely isn’t fully calm. There’s a small thrum of- something- under his skin that he can’t place. He takes a quick glance around the bus and sees that nothing is amiss and peering out the window shows him that they’re about the only car on the road. It is three am in butt-fuck nowhere Oklahoma, of course everything’s fine. Just as Quinn is about to chalk his restlessness up to still riding the high of the game they just won, his phone starts to ring.
It’s Jack.
Everything makes sense when Quinn sees the name light up the screen- he’s always had a weird brotherly sixth sense when it came to Jack or Luke needing him. He remembers not sleeping a wink when Luke went off to college for the first week and sure enough his brother finally called him four days in to vent about all the change.
“Hey Jack, what’s up?” It hits Quinn right as the words leave his mouth that he knows what’s up. The Jersey Devils took a pretty nasty loss against Vegas tonight, he had seen the headline a few hours ago and promptly texted Luke that they’d get them next time. He forgot to text Jack, shit.
“You busy?” There’s more mumbling in Jack’s words than normal and even more pieces click into place for Quinn. He leans forward in his seat so hopefully his phone conversation won’t disturb any of his new teammates.
“On the bus, heading down south. How’re you doing? I couldn’t watch the game but I heard you lost.” Quinn offers softly and hears his brother sniffle a little. His heart aches that he can’t be there with his brother in person, if nothing else but to wrap him in his arms to protect him from whatever criticizing thoughts Quinn knows Jack’s having right now.
“It was so bad Q, they were so mean.” His words pitch up with a small whine that has Quinn clutching his phone tighter. While he’s used to Jack calling him after a bad game and kind of falling back into his childishness more, he usually isn’t this upset.
“Who was? Did they say something?” Chirping is normal and Quinn has heard from multiple people that his two brothers have absolutely no problems throwing out their fair share of insults but it could’ve been taken too far. The Vegas Knights can be ruthless assholes to anyone but especially a lower ranked team like the Devils.
“Said a bunch of stuff. The fans were mad too.” Quinn can hear the frustrated hand his brother rubs at his face alongside the sadness lacing each word. Jack always takes the fans reactions harder than Quinn or Luke, which says something considering Luke has gotten booed personally at a game now and the Canuck fans seem to want Quinn’s head on a stick.
“We all have bad games bub, you can’t let whatever they said get to you.” A huff is the reply Quinn gets as a small smile tugs at his lips. Jack’s overtired and needs some sleep, Quinn can feel it in his damn bones from states away.
“S’not fair, I tried really hard. I thought- I thought I was doin’ good.” More of a lisp appears with the mumbling Jack’s already doing so Quinn has to strain his ears to fully understand what’s being said. He could always ask Jack to repeat it but he knows it’d be useless, when Jack gets into this headspace and tone it isn’t easy to get him out of it.
“Oh bub. Of course you were doing good, you put your everything into that team and that’s you can do. The rest is- out of your control.” Not that Quinn himself is good at following that sentiment but he knows Jack needs the assurance.
“One of the defense guys said I- said I shouldn’t be in the league.” For a brief moment Quinn sees red and debates buying a plane ticket to Jersey just to hunt down whatever defense man said that, but he takes a steadying breath and reminds himself he needs to be there for Jack. He’s his big brother and that is the most important thing, even more than hockey.
“Well he’s dead wrong. You’ve worked so hard for your spot on the team and the league is lucky to have you. Do you hear me?” Another huff from Jack and Quinn reaches to rub his tired eyes, wondering if he was too harsh with that last sentiment. It’s hard to know when he’s so sleep deprived and can’t see Jack’s face to judge his reactions more.
“Real Jersey fans love you even when a game goes bad, it’s only the fake ones that are rude about it. And I’m so proud of you bub, always, you know that.” He makes sure to keep his words soft and airy the way Jack always falls into. Even when they were kids he’d sober up from crying or a rage fit if Quinn talked to him extra gently.
“Wish you were here.” Quinn’s heart squeeze again.
“I know, me too. I’ll see you in a few weeks when we come to Jersey okay?” It’s not nearly soon enough for either brother.
“Promise?”
“Promise. You feel any better?” A small laugh escapes Quinn when Jack yawns loudly on the other end of the phone, making a barely coherent sound that could be considered a yes.
“Lukey’s here, he wants t’talk to you.” Quinn bids Jack a quick goodbye before he hears shuffling and then a deep sigh that can only belong to the youngest Hughes brother.
“Hey Luke, you holding up okay?” It doesn’t seem that Luke is in that childish state of mind that Jack is, he rarely is unless Quinn talks him down into it, but Quinn can hear how tense Luke is by the way he flops down onto whatever he’s sitting on.
“Rough game. Jack’s taking it hard.” Another sigh and Quinn really wishes he could be there in person to triage the boys’ emotions. Even years on different teams and living so far from each other, Quinn finds himself feeling like he should be at the edge of the ice to congratulate them when they win or wipe their tears when they loose after every game like when they were all kids.
“I heard. He asleep yet?” Luke hums through a chuckle and Quinn finds himself leaning back against his seat, happy to hear his brother loose some of his tension so quickly.
“He’s got your Canucks sweatshirt balled up by his face, he’s gonna suffocate around that thing.” The picture is clear as day in Quinn’s head- Jack laid by the top of their hotel bed, knees tucked up like always, Quinn’s old oversized hoodie smothering him as he hugs it tight, and probably small snores escaping him. It’s a nice thought, comforting to know Jack has moved on from the game enough to sleep so peacefully.
“I should probably get him a new one since I’m not a stupid Canuck anymore.” Luke snorts.
“Good luck prying that thing away from him, I don’t know the last time he washed it.” Knowing Jack and how sentimental he gets, a long ass time ago. Quinn cringes thinking of how much sleep drool and sweat has to be accumulated in the fabric.
“Do you still have yours?” One of the only items Luke let Quinn give him when he had slipped at the lake house two summers ago- that day will surely haunt Quinn for the rest of his damn life.
Him, Jack, and Luke had the house to themselves and while everything had been going fine there was one night when Quinn woke up to Luke screaming bloody murder. He doesn’t think his feet ever moved so quickly than how fast he burst into Luke’s room to see what was wrong. It was just a nightmare but it left Luke crying and whimpering out for Quinn. He remembers wrapping Luke up in his arms and carrying him down to the couch like they were still kids. Luke had looked so scared anytime Quinn moved even an inch away that Quinn had to negotiate with him so he could go calm Jack down since he also woke up to Luke screaming, that’s how Luke ended up with Quinn’s favorite Canucks hoodie as his own.
“Mm yeah but I want a Wild one, I like the green better anyway.” Luke seems to be fidgeting with something from the background noise and Quinn’s inclined to think he’s already wearing the Canuck hoodie Quinn was asking about.
“I’ll get you both one. You sure you’re okay after the game? Jack said Vegas was pretty mean.” He doesn’t like to change the topic to something so depressing but if he doesn’t ask he knows Luke won’t tell. He’s a lot more hesitant than Jack is to open up to Quinn over the phone, preferring to see him in person.
“Just chirping, normal shit I guess. I was tuning it out so I didn’t hear much of what they were saying.” So he was dissociating during the game. That’s not good.
“Jack said someone told him he shouldn’t be in the league.” At that Luke grumbles something under his breath and moves around, Quinn lets him take his time to answer.
“I didn’t hear that. I would’ve punched that fucker out, I swear it.” Both of them would’ve.
“I know. You weren’t engaged in the game?” He makes sure it doesn’t sound like an accusation, their parents used to be so hard on Luke for not paying enough attention to things or purposefully ignoring them. He never did, not really, he just zones out the same way Quinn does.
“I don’t know, kinda not, it was hard. The Knights always talk so much and our team was kinda floundering around not knowing what to do. I think it got to everyone’s head.” Not unheard of for the Devils to be uncoordinated in their playing but Quinn can tell it’s bothering Luke more than he’s trying to let on. He’s probably sick of it the same way Quinn was sick of how the Canucks played before he traded.
“That it?” An opening for Luke to lean into Quinn’s brotherly comfort or to move on completely.
“I felt so- lost. On the ice, I mean. Nobody was working together and I couldn’t figure out what to do with myself. At least Jack was making plays and doing what he was supposed to do but I just… I don’t know…” a frustrated groan leaves Luke but he quickly snaps his mouth shut and Quinn guesses he remembered Jack’s sleeping in the same room.
“You guys have been playing a lot lately and have won a decent amount of games, try not to overthink tonight. You’ll feel better when your team gets their shit together.” It comes across as more of a dig than Quinn intended but Luke laughs in earnest.
“Yeah, yeah you’re probably right. I might try and talk to Nico about it at practice tomorrow.” That’d be a good step in the right direction to try and get the Devils more on the same page as one another.
“As a former captain, that’s a good idea.” Luke chuckles again but it dies off a little too soon to be natural.
“Hey Quinny?” His words are too small for Quinn to ignore and he feels his brow furrow in confusion. His brother was just fine two seconds ago.
“What’s up kid?” He silently curses himself for picking up the nickname so easily for Luke when Luke isn’t in that headspace, but surprisingly Luke doesn’t fight him on it.
“When are we gonna see you again?” Something has entered Luke’s mouth but Quinn doesn’t know what. Maybe a hoodie string? Maybe a finger? Maybe the corner of his shirt? Who knows but Quinn can hear the object being talked around.
“A couple weeks. Missing me?” He grins when Luke rushes out the fakest ‘no!’ he’s ever heard. Quinn’s always found it so funny how opposite Jack and Luke get in this state and how obvious they both are.
“Wanna know something?”
“Yeah! Tell me, tell me, tell me!” For three am Luke has way too much energy and Quinn finds himself fondly chuckling as he lightly tells Luke to be quiet so he doesn’t wake Jack.
“I miss you guys all the time. Every day, Lukey.” It’s smooth and gentle flowing from Quinn’s mouth, the truth. He lets his eyes slip shut at the sound of his brother’s huffed out embarrassment that’s probably got his cheeks painted a rosy red color.
“Fine, miss you too. You’re so far away all the time, it’s not fair.” It’s drawn out in a whine that pierces Quinn’s ear a little but he refuses to move his phone away. He’d never miss a second of this.
“I know bug. But I’ll make you a deal, I’ll do whatever you and Jack want next time we see each other okay? I’ll risk my career sneaking into the Devils hotel and everything.” Luke giggles carefree and happy and Quinn swears this is his life purpose. To take care of his baby brothers and make them forget how hard things can be, like he’s always tried to.
“Movie night? With a fort?” Jack will surely want to do something more adventurous than that but Luke only ever really cares that Quinn’s as close to him as humanly possible.
“If that’s what you want. But you and Jack have to agree on something cause we only get one night.” A small sad sound leaves Luke and Quinn feels about the same.
“No fair. Your new team gets to see you all the time and we only get a night, that’s a rip off.” He must be feeling more like a kid by the thin jealousy and old sayings Quinn doesn’t hear Luke use anymore. He’s usually a fair bit older than Jack gets if Quinn isn’t there in person.
“Well me and my team aren’t sitting around watching movies like I do with you two.” All Quinn gets is a groan that’s too loud for three am that he does his best not to laugh at.
“I want you here… now…” Something desperate and pain filled flits across Luke’s words and Quinn’s whole demeanor falls with it.
“Woah, woah, hey I’m right here. I’m not going anywhere, it’s alright.” He hadn’t meant to upset Luke but Luke sniffs hard on the other side and it’s obvious he’s keeping himself from letting his emotions out.
“Talk to me, what’s wrong? You were just okay, what happened?” Quinn switches his phone to his other hand and leans forward again, wishing he could pace around to try and help calm some of his own nerves.
“It’s been so long since I’ve seen you and Jack’s sleepin’ and I’m all alone and I miss you!” It’s all but a shout that Quinn can’t help but wince hearing. Fuck, he hadn’t thought Luke was so tense lately.
“Kiddo you’re not alone, I’m right here and if you really want to you can wake Jack up. I don’t think he’d mind.” It’s got to be four something in New Jersey if it’s three something in Oklahoma so waking Jack wouldn’t be the end of the world.
“Not the same! I want you!” A sob bursts from the other end of the phone and Quinn’s whole body tenses. He’s never had to deal with Luke so upset over the phone before- Jack sure, he cries easiest out of the three of them but he also calms the easiest too. The way Quinn would normally sooth Luke isn’t an option right now since he normally just tucks Luke up to his chest and tells him to listen to his heartbeat. But right now it sounds like he’s being torn apart from the inside out the way his cries have become mixed into gasps and hiccuping breaths.
“Okay, hey, shhh, it’s alright. Bug listen to me, you gotta calm down before you make yourself sick. Take some deep breaths with me.” In an attempt he isn’t sure will actually work, Quinn starts to exaggerate his breathing extra loudly so Luke can hopefully hear it over his own sobbing.
“C’mon kid just follow me, you’re okay. That’s it, I’m right here.” In what Quinn counts as a miracle Luke actually starts to try and listen to him.
They sit on the phone for a few minutes just breathing while Quinn murmurs out praise for how well Luke’s doing and how he’s not going anywhere. The kid isn’t exactly breathing normally by the time he goes to speaks again but it’s a very big improvement. Quinn’s just relieved that Luke’s panic isn’t untouchable like he was worried about.
“Why don’t you try and wake Jack up, hm? He can stay up with you for a little.” Quinn offers. Luke was trying to murmur something but it was so small that Quinn really couldn’t catch it. He hates being so far from the two of them.
“He’s already awake.” A small shuffle sound before Jack’s voice comes sleepily across the phone.
“Hi Quinny. Woke up cause I heard Lukey cryin’.”
“Hi bub, you think you can sit with Luke for a bit? He’s having a rough night.” The two younger brothers talk to each other but Quinn can’t make it out from wherever they have the phone. It makes his stomach churn thinking about how they’re all alone like this.
“I’ll stay up with him, don’t worry Quinny!” Jack says very triumphantly and Quinn can only imagine what position those two are in now. Jack definitely pulled Luke into his bed or has crawled into Luke’s but either way he doubts they’re more than five inches apart.
“Thank you honey. You gonna be okay?” The bus is starting to pull into a rest stop that’ll surely have anyone who isn’t still awake waking up and probably hearing Quinn’s phone call.
“Mm Luke wants to say good night, he looks sleepy.” Another phone trade off and Quinn gets to hear the absolutely adorable little yawn Luke lets out. Not crying anymore and definitely relaxed, Quinn doesn’t think he’s been this relieved in months.
“You and Jack laying together?”
“Yeah, he’s holdin’ me like you do. M’tired.” Quinn hums along softly.
“I’m sure you are bug. Get some rest okay? I’ll call you tomorrow.” Technically today but it’s hitting four am here and there’s no way either younger brother will be showing proof of life til it’s at least four pm.
“Night-night Quinny.”
“Night-night.”
-
The call ends and Quinn lets his head fall back against the seat with a huff. He’s exhausted himself and as the bus rolls to a stop, he really wishes they had a hotel lined up or even just a parking lot to stay in rather than continuing to drive all night. He’s about to say screw the rest stop and let himself drift to sleep but a hand on his shoulder jerks him back awake. It’s Brock, more accurately, everyone on the bus seems to have their eyes on him from their seats or even standing in the aisle.
“Everything okay?” Brock asks sincerely and Quinn nods along easily.
“You sure? Didn’t sound like it on that phone call?” His face screws up momentarily, not wanting to reveal his brother’s biggest secret that he knows they’ve only ever shared with Nico but also not knowing a good lie.
“Ah yeah, Devils just lost pretty bad and Jack and Luke were… feeling it.” It’s a horrible explanation but Brock drops his hand from Quinn’s shoulder so he assumes it’s enough.
“Hey Quinn which one’s bub and which one’s bug?” Matt asks from a few rows back where he’s leaned over the back of the seat in front of him. Quinn’s whole face lights up red as he sputters around nothing with how taken aback he is by the question.
“Don’t be a dick! He’s allowed to comfort his brothers y’know, he is the oldest.” Jesper swats a hand at Matt who just rolls his eyes.
“Think Luke is bug and Jack is bub.” Kirill says beside Quinn easily and Quinn can only gap at him.
“Kap!”
“What? I sit next to you, very easy to hear.” Jesus.
“Christ just- just don’t bring this up to my brothers, they’d kill me and all of you too.” Kirill just laughs and shakes his head while mumbling something in Russian under his breath, probably how he’d snap the Hughes brothers like twigs.
“Don’t worry Quinnsota, we’re all sworn to secrecy.” Brock assures before starting to actually walk off the bus with others following. Quinn can only hope Brock’s right and the team won’t say anything. He can worry about it later, for now he goes back to looking at Kirill’s book and letting himself drift off to sleep knowing his brothers are safe and together in Jersey.