Chapter Text
Today was another of the several days were Saeyoung's shift didn't match Saeran's appointments, so instead, Zen and Yoosung had accompanied him to therapy. The three of them were chatting quietly - or well, Zen and Yoosung chatted and Saeran listened quietly - as the waiting room was quite filled. There were many children there, and Saeran was particularly gazing at a toddler and her mother. That little girl would grab a book from the kids' shelf and her mother would help her read it... She grabbed one with an elephant in the cover, and the mother would point her to it and ask 'what animal is it?', 'what's it called?' 'what does it say?' as the little girl would excitedly respond.
The mother would stroke her little girl's curls, the girl would rest her tiny head on her mother's lap. Saeran bit his lip, he felt his eyes particularly more watery than usual... It was so weird. At some point the girl threw a little screech that pierced through everyone's ears, yet her mother wasn't mad, she didn't even scold or kindly corrected her... She just somehow peacefully managed to get her to stop. Why was it so moving? Why did that feel so warm?
At some point Zen and Yoosung realized their friend wasn't paying attention, so they looked at what he was looking. "Hey, Sae, are you okay, bud?" asked Zen, looking at his timid body language and getting his eyes' attention.
"...Oh... I'm fine" Saeran responded quietly, rubbing his left eye slightly. "I just... I was looking at that mother. Her child is so cute... And she's so kind to her... So... so kind..." As soon as he said that, both men knew what was going on Saeran's head... None of them knew how to react to it, but they let him be.
"Your mother never really did any of that to you, right?" Yoosung had the bravery to ask, immediately regretting it after receiving a bad stare from the actor.
"...Not really. She was always so mad, I thought it was because she had children way too young, when she didn't want them... But this mother seems young too, and... she's still so warm and patient. That kid just screamed in a waiting room full of people and she... she didn't tell her anything."
A moment of silence followed, the two men almost felt guilty for pitying him. While Yoosung thought of something to say, Zen tried to relate, empathy usually was his first approach; "...My mom wasn't that kind with me either. It sucks, right? I'm glad that little girl has a kind mother..."
"...Are... Are those kinds of moms, like... normal? Is this what it should be like?"
"It's definitely what it should be like." replied Yoosung. "Not sure if it's exactly the norm... I can't remember how I was at that age, but I think my mother was kind of like that."
"Yeah, and you're the only member of the RFA who still has a relationship with their mom" Zen reminded him quietly with a raised eyebrow. "Sae, your mother was really bad, right? But it shouldn't have gone that way. You should've been loved as much as this little girl is."
Saeran did not respond. He came back to looking at the toddler. She was sitting on her mother's lap, her reading the kid a book.
"...Some part of me still doesn't believe you... But I'm grateful that at least Saeyoung...."
"Oh, Saeyoung read you stories as a kid, right? He told us about it" said Yoosung with a soft smile. "It's nice to have at least a brother by your side..."
"Same, I had an older brother that would treat me more kindly than my parents..." added Zen. It was impressive that even when Saeran was the theme of conversation, he still managed to be so quiet. It was kind of adorable, he thought. "Sae, did you have a favorite children's book?"
"Mmh... I had one... But it's a little embarrassing." For the first time in the conversation, Saeran's lips curved into a slight smile. "It was about a king who had dark powers, and he was really strong... He was the strongest of them all, and nobody could stand against him, but also everyone feared him; so he was always sad inside... So the king broke his spell because he realized it was better to be weak and happy."
"That's a strange way to put the Dark Lord story" Zen chuckled. "But I guess that was your interpretation as a kid... It kinda reminds me of the old aggressive Saeran that MC told us about."
"Yeah" Yoosung seconded with a giggle, "And you also gave up the power and strength to be happy, right? Everything's better now..."
"...Yeah... The little girl must be imagining a good story with that book too. Saeyoung and I... well, I guess not everything about my childhood was bad. I should cling onto that happiness when I see a nice mother and her child... So I won't become bitter of a toddler's life."
"I mean, you do have a right to envy that kid" replied Yoosung, "You should've been treated that way..."
Then, Zen added; "It actuallly speaks better of you that you want to see this through a merry lense, so don't worry."
"Yes... Instead of wishing I had that mother... Today I'll be grateful I had a brother." He said, one single tear escaping his bleached eyelashes. He rubbed his cheek softly as he turned around to see his therapist's door opening, revealing one last patient and the man in question. "...Oh, it's my turn... Will you wait here for me?"
"Yup! Take your time, we'll be here" nodded Yoosung excitedly.
"Good luck, Sae..." Zen said in a calmer, almost more tired tone than his friend's.