Chapter Text
"Your Highness, don't run!"
The sound of footsteps echoed across the lawn around the Palace and the servant maids chased after the small figure in front of them.
It was as if the person was one with the wind and with another turn, the person they were chasing after disappeared in a blink around the tree.
One of the servant maids bent her waist, gripping her skirts and panted hard.
"Usually, his highness is well behaved, but the moment the Royal teacher starts teaching about Governance, he finds every opportunity to slip away", the maid wiped the sweat from her forehead and sighed.
"I heard the Second Prince told on him to His Majesty last time?" Everyone serving the Royal family were well aware of the personalities of the three Princes. So no one was surprised to hear this piece of news.
"But what of it? I heard that His Majesty only laughed heartily and dismissed it saying that he is healthy enough to still sit on the throne and he can afford one of his sons living his life without worrying about court affairs"
"Did he really say that?" One of them asked, hushing her tone. Clearly, they no longer cared about the Young Prince who slipped away and were already immersed in the gossips.
"Why would I lie?", The maid dramatically folded her arms across her chest. She was serving at the Emperor's side yesterday and thus spoke confidently, "Isn't it obvious that the Emperor doesn't really put any hope on the Fourth Prince?"
"Shh", the other maid lowered her tone, "Speak quietly. Fourth Prince isn't even 18 yet"
"So what?" The maid had a natural bias for the Second Prince. "In the history of Royal family, which other Prince has ever taken the surname of their mother? Isn't it obvious that—"
Before she could finish, she felt a chill on her back. As if scalded, she turned around to see an imposing figure clad in black looking at them with narrowed eyes right across from them. His look was condescending as if they were but ants in his vision, a single wrong step and they would truly be crushed to their deaths.
The maid took a step back and bowed instinctively, knees going weak.
"General."
"General.", Others followed suit.
The man was tall and imposing, his shoulders broad and when his eyes weren't curved in a smile his aura made others unable to even lift their heads.
There was only silence.
Wind blew past, and the General's gaze drifted from the worthless ants to the rustling leaves of the century old tree below which the servant maids stood, bowing their head.
When the maids grew nervous at the silence, the General finally moved his lips speaking a single word.
"Leave.", The General was a man of few words, that they've heard already but they could tell that he was in a bad mood at that moment. They didn't know what they've done to anger the General but it wouldn't be wise to stay any longer. So without waiting for a second word, they quickly walked past him.
But right then, the General seemed to have quickly changed his mood and added a few words.
"You all are from the Second Prince's manor, right?" His voice drawled, even when all they could see is his back, they couldn't help but shudder in fear.
"I'll remember."
After that, he didn't care about the state of those behind him and stepped forward. With each step, his lips curved up a bit, the smile that could scare others out of wits was instead replaced by something close to genuine.
He came to a stop before the tree. His arms across his chest, he didn't even look up before calling out softly, "Xiao Shen."
Silence. The leaves rustled twice with the wind as if to tell on the bird that is hiding amidst it.
The person above seemed to even hold his breath, trying to minimize his presence as much as possible but the person below didn't move as if he was amused.
The General chuckled softly before calling out again, "Xiao Shen, are you coming down or should I come up to..."
before he could finish, the branches of the tree swayed, and a figure clad in white plopped— more so, flew down.
The General's pupil shrank for a moment before he held out an arm to capture the bird that drifted his way.
"...catch you."
The world seemed to have paused for the Fourth Prince. His face buried against the General's layers of robes, but even through that, his nose could catch the other's unique scent.. it was refreshing and he could still hear the steady heartbeat of the other person which was completely opposite to his own erratic heartbeat.
He might find out.
The next moment, he heard the rumble of the other's chest and the deep voice close to his ear, "Is this a new way of greetings me?"
As if scalded, he dramatically jumped out of the other man's arms and stepped back quick. He was too focussed on the person before him that he forgot his back was to the tree. But before he could feel the impending pain of crashing into the tree, a gentle arm was placed on his back.
He sucked in a breath and looked up to see the General's sharp chin and the lips that always seemed to be curved up in a smile that's not really there. He could see the lips move but not a single word entered his head.
All he could sense was the warmth of the other's body close to him.
"Were you listening?"
His face immediately flushed red and heart filled with guilt at being caught red-handed.
The General seemed to remember something else from the past as he shook his head with a smile.
"Kids.. they always grow up."
But all Shen Pingan could think about is their proximity. The General's hands were still placed on his back, his breath still fell at the top of his head, his chin could graze his ear if he so moved forward, leaned forward even a little..
They were impossibly close, closer than ever before.
Suddenly, he could feel a warm touch below his chin. A jolt spread through his body and his eyes flew wide. He blinked his eyes rapidly, looking into the General's calm yet... teasing gaze.
"...General?"
"Weren't you always interested in asking me questions before? Why so quiet today?"
Shen Pingan gulped. His throat dry.
"All grown up, so you don't care about this old General anymore?"
He was obviously just teasing but Shen Pingan could feel his own knees grow weak. "You're not that old..", he squeezed his voice from the bottom of his heart.
The General's eyes curved up in a smile before his thumb rubbed a teasing curve on Shen Pingan's chin before he took a step back. The scalding touch left Shen Pingan's head dizzy, he stood there still, with his back to the tree.
He saw the General took another step back and immediately called out in panic, "Is.. the General leaving?"
The General's lips still curved in a smile as he gave a dramatic sigh, "You want me to stand here while your heart is elsewhere. Do you think it's fair?"
"No" Shen Pingan almost lost his composure while denying. "The General wants to talk?"
The General raised his eyebrows, "So I'm the one who wants to talk and not you?"
"No— General, you.."
"That's fine, you don't have to hold back in front of me. I shall take my leave.."
"General, I didn't—"
"I came all the way to the Palace so I can rendezvous with a certain Prince who sneaked a letter to my carriage last time I left for the border, only for the person to have a change of heart when I came back."
At the reminder, Shen Pingan's face flushed red. He clearly didn't mean to put that letter! It was the General himself who roguishly took the secret letter!
"Was I too late that.. your heart that once ached to hear the sound of the cavalry's return now aches for a young lady's melody instead?"
How can he still remember those words from his letter!
Unable to find the right words, Shen Pingan stumbled over his words, his heart still beating in a frenzy. The General was just teasing him! He knew that. The General only thought of his words as a child's nonsense and he just loved to tease him but to Pingan, the scene painted an intimacy that he could only secretly long for.
"General, don't tease me..", he mumbled low.
"Now, you don't even take this General seriously"
"You—" Shen Pingan looked up, utterly helpless, only to see the General who was now smiling wide and then the person shamelessly broke into a laughter.
Was it that good to tease him?
"Ok, ok, I won't tease you anymore." Even if he said that, there were still traces of laughter in his words. "I really have to attend a meeting at the Palace Hall. I have to leave."
"Oh.", Shen Pingan blinked, reluctance still written all over his face.
"Come on, give me a smile" The General reached out to tousle his hair as usual but his hands paused midway through, as if he suddenly realised something, he only chuckled before drawing his hand back.
"Kids do really grow up."
That was the second time the General brought it up today. And this time, he could see an air of melancholy surrounding the person.
And when the General stepped back to leave this time, Shen Pingan couldn't help but call out. "General."
The person paused in his tracks and tilted his head to the side, not turning back.
Shen Pingan could only see his side profile but he was still nervous. "I hope you remember our deal." He fidgeted with his sleeves, clearly all the bravado was only for the words. Deep down, he was afraid that the General never considered him even as an adult.
The corner of the other person's lips hooked up. "How old are you this year?"
"Seventeen."
Then, the General seemed to laugh and completely leave his back towards Shen Pingan. "Grow up quick then."
"Until we meet again, dianxia."
Shen Pingan stood rooted at that very spot for a long, long time. So long he couldn't even see the shadow of the other's cloak in his sight. It was as if this encounter, the arm that caught him safely when he slipped, the gentle embrace that followed, the scalding heat on his chin and the teasing that the General reserved only for him were all but a dream that he made up to satisfy his own inner shameful desires.
It was only a long time later did he take a deep breath and close his eyes while muttering a secret so silent that not even his own heart could hear it, lest it betray him.
"You have made a promise to me"
Qi Fengge.
.
.
.
Shen Pingan once truly believed that he could soar into the sky without a care in this world, for whenever he happened to fall, there would always be an embrace waiting for him.
Then, why?
He couldn't find his voice. He wanted to scream, but not a word came out. His back was still plastered against that very tree that he used to lean against and nod off. But surrounding him was screams of maids, bloodshed and the flames of war.
It can't be like this..
He didn't realise that he was kneeling, he didn't realise that tears were streaming down his eyes, he didn't realise all those wounds big and small on him. He couldn't register his own pain as he watched his Dage, the Crown Prince scrape at the ground before him with his nails, using the last bit of strength to mutter a few words.
"Run away."
"Xiao-Shen, run away."
"Keep running."
"Don't look back."
But how can Shen Pingan move?
He knelt there, with his hands planted to the ground. His body shivering not with pain but with cold.
It was so cold.. everything was so cold.
He looked down at his hands.. everything was red.
There was so much blood.
That blood.. it was his dage's..
It was his own kin's.
He wanted to scream too, he wanted to run away too.. but, he couldn't. He watched as the last bit of life slip away from his dage, those eyes that were once filled with doting towards him now looked at him with despair.
And yet, he, Shen Pingan was still alive. Still breathing. Still.. useless.
A heart wrenching cry sounded.
He didn't even know if it was his own voice anymore.
He only knew that it was soon muffled as he was pressed against a solid chest. The moment the familiar scent engulfed him, he looped his arms around the other person, and buried his face at the crook of the other's neck. He thought he had already ran out of tears but who would have thought he would soak the other's armor wet?
But the person holding him said not a single word.
He carried him in his embrace, patting his back soothingly. There was not a single word said but Shen Pingan couldn't stop his tears.
It felt like he really had cried for a long time.
"General", he didn't even know if he managed to call out, and if he did, how hoarse his voice was or whether the General even heard him. "I am tired..", he mumbled, not even he could hear his own words. "I want to.."
He didn't manage to finish his words, for he no longer had a home to go back to.
Maybe it was an illusion, or it was a pity thrown at the noble who fell from his grace but the General hummed softly in his ears.
"I will take you home."
« An Emperor replaces another; yet there was no reprieve for the common folk. A dynasty can fall and rise overnight, but what of a home that one painstakingly built? »
— Jianghu Tales, 1462.