Chapter Text
Atsushi stood in the open field of the orphanage letting the wind blow through his horrible terribly chopped ass looking hair.
There wasnt much in the orphange grounds. It had a foresty looking area, some grass and some crops.
However despite the orphanages low income, it still had a suprisingly big open area and somehow they managed to keep the grass green.
But thats all there was to the grounds. A bunch of green grass and an area that had alot of trees. Kids would often go to play in the forest like area. They usually played tag.
Still, there wasnt anything special to it.
Once a flower managed to grow, one lone beautiful white flower that stood out and glowed beautifully beneath the moon
Atsushi was the first to see it. He had been wandering around at night since he couldnt sleep when he came across it
Unfortunately, because of how much it stood out it was quickly surrounded by kids and sqaushed into the ground.
A flower like that never grew again.
Atsushi walked to where he had seen the flower. It used to be just outside the little forest area.
It wasnt dark outside and there were other kids playing in the grounds too.
While walking he passed by the same kids that had been with him for the "sleepover". He stopped to look at them again.
The girl was running after her friend, attempting to catch her in her arms. They were both laughing.
Slowley they both stopped, having run out of breath. The girl stood with her hands on her knees, taking deep breaths.
When she managed to get herself together, she looked turned to the side and atsushi watched as her smile dissapeared.
They held eye contact for a minute before the other girl put her hand on the girls back and led her away as if atsushi was someone who brought up trauma (as if she wasnt the reason he was beaten)
He continued his walk to the graveyard of the flower.
He sat down by a near tree and watched everyone else. It was kinda boring but what else should he do.
"Hey" atsushi opened his eyes. He hasnt realised he closed them.
He knew the voice and he wanted to ignore it. But he couldnt could he? He cant ignore others. Hes not better than them, in fact theyre the ones who are better than him (and deep down he will always hold a hatred towards them for that)
"Hi hisaharu" atsushis voice came out small and tired.
Hisaharu eyes widened slightly when he got to see atsushi properly. He took in his eye bags and disheveled state and coulnt help but feel bad. (He also looked kinda cute?)
Hisaharu sat down next to atsushi and brought his knees to his chest (a trait atsushi would later pick up)
He stared infront of him for a second before speaking again
"So.....do you like flowers?"
Atsushi was slightly surprised by his question. Was it about the flower that once grew here?
Atsushi didnt reply, only nodded his head. Hisaharu hummed at that.
"The flower that grew here," so it was about the flower, "i planted it. Its called a moonflower. Pretty right?"
Now atsushi was intrigued. Hisaharu had planted the flower? He turned to look at hisaharu.
The wind blew around his redish hair and the sun reflected beautifully of his yellow eyes. He looked beautiful.
Atsushi sheepisy turned away when hisaharu caught him staring.
"You planted the flower? It must have taken alot of care and time to make sure the others didnt ruin it" he said quietly, staring at his hands. Could he every give that much care to someone? Father ways said he would just bring misfortune to everyone.
"Oh yeah!!! It did believe me. It took so much effort to stop others from running over it!!! Especially the younger ones!!!" Hisaharu laughed out. He was loud and his smile was big. Atsushi liked that look on him.
Hisaharu moved to lie down on the grass, keeping his arms spread out. Atsushi followed suit except he kept his hands to his side.
Atsushi turned to his side, keeping one arm beneath his head. Hisaharu did the same.
Atsushi could see his freckles and his eyelashes. He was simply stunning.
They talked more, avout anything that came to mind. The stars, the moon, the sun, the orphanage staff (the were alot quieter while talking about that one) and different chores they had to do.
Overtime they moved closer to eachother, now they layed shoulder to shoulder, staring above them and pointing at whatever.
They hadnt noticed when their hands both moved to eachother
They hadnt noticed when they both held eachothers hands.
Atsushi was momentarily distracted by whispering from the sides. He turned to look at where it was coming from.
A girl and a boy stood whispering to each other and sparing quick glances at hisaharu and atsushi
Hisaharu had also noticed by now and had quieted down. They both sat up, still not letting go of eachothers hands.
Atsushi strained his ears to find out what theyre saying and safe to say he wasnt happy when he heard it.
He slowly unravelled his hands from hisaharu and brought them to his lap again. He stared down at his hands.
"Atsushi? Whats wrong? What are they saying?" Hisaharu asked, worring growing in his heart. He didnt like seeing atsushi sad. He hated when he saw new marks on atsushi but was too afraid to say anything.
If only he was stronger.
"Theyre calling us gay" atusshi said in a small voice. He looked away from hisaharu
"Gay?......were not gay though. After all, thats a sin."
Atsushis shoulders tensed a bit and his hands had an almost imperceptible twitch.
"Yeah....a sin" atsushi replied. He knew he liked boys.....well atleast he thinks he does? Maybe. He definately didnt like girls....well maybe a few girls? But like...........only one or two snd they werent any in the orphanage. Just ones he thoight about one day meeting. He preferred thinking of himself with a boyfriend though.
Atsushi knew it was a sin. Thats what he was taught by father. Thats what they had all been taught.
So he never told anyone, he hoped this would go away eventually. That one day he would wake up and realise he actually did like girls and that it was all just a phase.
Suddenly a loud bell broke jim out of his thoughts. He looked towards the orphanage building and saw the large bell standing atop the library building. Hisaharu stood up and turned to atsushi. He held his hand out.
Atsushi hesitated for a minute before taking it. If he wasnt going to be able to be with a guy in the future then he could savour whatever he had now.
They didnt get to talk as much for the rest of the day but they spared glances at eachother through out the day.
At night, atsushi was forced to sleep in the basement as always.
That night it rained.